Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Its either 0 or 100

Pandora

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There is no point dating an American girl unless the girl is at 100% interest level. Anything less than a 100% might as well be a zero percent. Western women have so many options that they have become capricious for all but the most desirable men. This is all you need to know about modern women. We keep thinking that we will smash that 75% interest girl. You won't. Ever.....well maybe when she runs out of options in 5 yrs. Or maybe when she is black out drunk and immediately regrets it the next day.

When a girl likes you it is unexplainable. Most of the work is already done for you. We think that our "game" got the girl. No it didn't. Your game is the icing on the cake. Take a one night stand for example. Most of the time a girl was already planning on going home with a guy. She was in that type of messed up mental space BEFORE she went to the bar. It just took a halfway decent guy who was her "type" to close the deal.

Most of the time a girl already has a strong deeply idiosyncratic predisposition to a certain type of guy. Often this guy reminds her of a family member. The guy might be a member of the racial group she strongly fetishizes. The guy might remind her of a guy that used to abuse her and she is into that. The guy might be high status and she might be a gold digger.

There are many guys that are perfect on paper. Tall, good job, good social skills etc.They go on a date with the girl but the girl just doesn't feel the spark. She knows he is good on paper but he just doesn't do it for her. She has very personal preferences that are not tied to logic. That guy could be an objective 10/10 but just not to her. Girls also reject guys who are too high quality because of insecurity. THEY ARE CHAOS.....dont take them too serious.
 
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Pandora

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The only time these girls go for the " good on paper" guy is when they are running out of time. They go for him when they need to settle down for a beta bucks dude. She will divorce him later. When a girl likes you she will bang you even if you live in a van by the river. All that self improvement stuff is cool and all.....but it has limits. Just get in good shape and dont be a weirdo. The rest is out of your hands playa.
 

Who Dares Win

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So you are saying that attraction CANT be created and its either there or not?

Naaa bro come on, didnt you get the memo that is all about game, seduction and "frame?
 

mrgoodstuff

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So you are saying that attraction CANT be created and its either there or not?

Naaa bro come on, didnt you get the memo that is all about game, seduction and "frame?
Frame and game position your image to be "attractive" and you'll attract whatever you attract. Without it you'll be overlooked.
 

Who Dares Win

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Frame and game position your image to be "attractive" and you'll attract whatever you attract. Without it you'll be overlooked.
Your frame comes from who you are not what you do while "game" is the normal behaviour of someone according to his value.

A successful guy has a great game cause he is successful, its not that he is successful cause he has a great game.
 

Lookatu

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There's a quote: Seduction is nothing but a mirage and with enough time and repetition that mirage will slowly fade.

I do believe this based on my experience. I believe you can get girls to like you but to find someone that likes you for the long term, is very hard unless they are 100% into you like OP believes. If you just want plates or non serious STR's then this really doesn't apply as long as your game is on point.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Your frame comes from who you are not what you do while "game" is the normal behaviour of someone according to his value.

A successful guy has a great game cause he is successful, its not that he is successful cause he has a great game.
So a guy goes around his uncles for a few yrs who are good with women and the game gets into him and now he knows how to behave... And thus gets women. That was "game".
 

Barrister

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There's a quote: Seduction is nothing but a mirage and with enough time and repetition that mirage will slowly fade.

I do believe this based on my experience. I believe you can get girls to like you but to find someone that likes you for the long term, is very hard unless they are 100% into you like OP believes. If you just want plates or non serious STR's then this really doesn't apply as long as your game is on point.
Agree with this. We now have another thread getting started about how nothing we do matters outside of how we look/other latent characteristics. Yes, our looks are often very important. But to say that game makes no difference is just flat out wrong. For an LTR -- yes, that often is going to involve a lot more boxes being checked (by both parties) that may not necessarily have anything to do with "game." That is where your self-improvement comes into play, however. You can make them check more boxes if you are successful, in good shape, and have overall good drive. You DO have control over those things.

Get so tired of the fatalism on this board these days.
 

Lookatu

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I think game was more effective back in the day to make a less physically attractive guy seem more confident and therefore more attractive.
Yeah I remember that.
Is it me or do any of you older guys think game has evolved into more of how to act like a normal guy these days?
Eversince the internet and with guys addicted to porn, chatting online, reading various literature that would influence and shape their attitudes and behaviors these days, is it possible that game has evolved to wrangle back in guys to be "normal" again and not be socially awkward, creepy, clingy, and regain a sense of manhood that used to exist in more guys back in the day?
 

AttackFormation

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These days it does seem to be more random or entirely looks based.
I saw a girl in the store the other day and instinctively checked out her hip area, which she noticed. Then she slowly made her way over to her hair thinning, out of shape fat boyfriend in the queue. When they were leaving, she turned her head back to look at me in the eyes. I thought - she's with that guy who probably fvcks her every other day, but yet if she was swiping on OLD she would most likely swipe left on me for sure.

For me this is anecdotal evidence that, within a certain spectrum of not being too ugly or too model good looking, your personality and your lifestyle matter more than your looks do. If you don't have the personality to enjoy the numbers game process of pickup in itself, and you aren't in social contact with open single women, then you are handicapped. You anecdotally confirm that too when you say how your SMV and sex life are night and day between your rat race life in San Francisco and flying up here to the european vacation islands.
 
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Mike32ct

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So you are saying that attraction CANT be created and its either there or not?

Naaa bro come on, didnt you get the memo that is all about game, seduction and "frame?
Or my blue pilled favorite.....

“It will grow over time.”

“My wife wasn’t interested at first. But we got to know each other over 15 years. I was very ‘persistent,’ and now we’re married.”
 

mrgoodstuff

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I think game was more effective back in the day to make a less physically attractive guy seem more confident and therefore more attractive. After all you were only competing with men in your close proximity. These days it does seem to be more random or entirely looks based. I think the big point these days too is that if she is 75% interest then it's not worth the effort even if you get a few tepid lays out of it. It's not going to be worth the time spent and the rejection after the fact.
We said "game" is knowing how to behave, charisma and mannerisms. Its not PUA lines or routines.
 

samspade

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I saw a girl in the store the other day and instinctively checked out her hip area, which she noticed. Then she slowly made her way over to her hair thinning, out of shape fat boyfriend in the queue. When they were leaving, she turned her head back to look at me in the eyes. I thought - she's with that guy who probably fvcks her every other day, but yet if she was swiping on OLD she would most likely swipe left on me for sure.

For me this is anecdotal evidence that, within a certain spectrum of not being too ugly or too model good looking, your personality and your lifestyle matter more than your looks do. If you don't have the personality to enjoy the numbers game process of pickup in itself, and you aren't in social contact with open single women, then you are handicapped. You anecdotally confirm that too when you say how your SMV and sex life are night and day between your rat race life in San Francisco and flying up here to the european vacation islands.
"What's she doing with him?" is the good looking chump's lament. (Not calling you a chump of course, you know what I mean.)
 

AttackFormation

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Those types of relationships these days are usually born out of pairing early on or settling down post 30
Yeah about pairing early on, I guess that would be it. I looked up this girl from gymnasium a while ago, saw her pudgy husband and was like "who the fvck is that guy", "she's got a kid with him?" - but then I went back in the pictures and saw "wait, this is the same guy" and he used to be in shape. Same thing with another guy, although he has now gotten into better shape. So I guess what I saw was a similar case, the guy probably used to be in better shape.

You know what? If the universities here keep being online throughout the autumn due to corona, I want to relocate outside of the country during that time. One point is that I wanna go somewhere with warm winters. But the other is that I want to experience a different social culture, or see if it's the same everywhere as I suspect. I want to experience a social culture where exchanging IOIs in day to day life between strangers is seen as normal by women and they're happy to make eye contact and give a slight smile or wink, instead of pretending like you're not there even if you catch them looking at you after they thought you can't see. I'm tired of feeling like a fvcking prisoner even though I'm tall, pretty good looking, groom myself and make sure to have good posture, dress well and keep myself in good shape. It really shouldn't be this god damned hard.
 

Lookatu

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I want to experience a social culture where exchanging IOIs in day to day life between strangers is seen as normal by women and they're happy to make eye contact and give a slight smile or wink, instead of pretending like you're not there even if you catch them looking at you after they thought you can't see.
I felt so liberated and free when I was in South America last year. I could hit on any girl without even a thought and know things were cool with them. It definitely felt like I went back in time pre-feminism. I've never approached so many gals before that in some time in the way I did.
 

AttackFormation

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You would actually do well in the US I think
Well.... that american chick was the one who gave me the worst and most disrespectful rejection I'll probably ever experience.

But on the other hand, in my single week in St Louis I did experience more clear IOIs than I probably have in my whole life in Sweden outside of the cliques I earlier happened to be part of. The very first day, one girl either had a 6th sense that I was checking her out or she wanted to check me out too anyway. But instead of pretending like I wasn't there as girls here would do, she immediately turned to me and smiled while holding eye contact. I didn't do anything both because I was unsure whether she was a child or not, and frankly shocked to experience clear IOIs at all. I felt like I was staring into another dimension. Then another day, a store clerk's jaw dropped when she saw me and she couldn't hide her obvious interest inquiring about me. I thought to myself in the moment that she made a good effort and if she was tall, more pear shaped and pretty like the chick I went there for instead of being short and frumpy, I would've gotten to know her.

And that was with me living an asocial lifestyle while there in the winter (which by the way was extremely capricious! one day I was walking around in a t-shirt, the next it was a cold that made even me freeze like hell). Here I will go multiple summers walking around all over the place, and not experience a single IOI from a young woman.

Where would you suggest I'd go then?
 
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AttackFormation

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I felt so liberated and free when I was in South America last year. I could hit on any girl without even a thought and know things were cool with them. It definitely felt like I went back in time pre-feminism. I've never approached so many gals before that in some time in the way I did.
Wow, that sounds unbelievable to me dude. Here, if I hadn't grown up with an internet connection, I literally wouldn't even have known of the concept of hitting on strangers. It's just not in the culture here - as far as I've ever seen or heard of. But because I've never really experienced anything else, this is "normal" for me and I interpret it as a coping mechanism fantasy to imagine that it could be otherwise. But that's really what it was like for you there? And where else have you lived as comparison points?
 
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mrgoodstuff

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Wow, that sounds unbelievable to me dude. Here, if I hadn't grown up with an internet connection, I literally wouldn't even have known of the concept of hitting on strangers. It's just not in the culture here - as far as I've ever seen or heard of. But because I've never really experienced anything else, this is "normal" for me and I interpret it as a coping mechanism fantasy to imagine that it could be otherwise. But that's really what it was like for you there?
Over here in the states and before the internet took off, we would notice people in the street or area and simply say "hello". Other guys would "mack" to them. The real "macks" don't necessarily try to get laid, they are just having fun with the conversation. For the non stuck up women, it's fun for them too. People talking, bullshytting and having fun.
 
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