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Atom Smasher

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That's the attitude that works for me on these silly girls. Yesterday I went into a radiology place to get an x-ray, and a cute Latina was registering me. She took me into a back office, and as an experiment I was very cool and detached with her, almost like I found her to be an annoyance but I was putting up with her. I was on the verge of unfriendly, but not quite.

Naturally I was sitting with legs apart, taking up lots of space, but being quite indifferent toward her, looking off at this and that as I was talking to her.

Now 5 years ago, this girl wouldn't have given me the time of day. Yesterday she was supplicating like nobody's business, working overtime to attain my interest.

To think I've spent 40 years not having a clue that this was what attracts women! All those years I was nice, friendly, and everything society taught me to be, and although I always had a girlfriend, general female acceptance was hard to come by.

Frankly, I would rather just be a decent, friendly guy without all the games, but that doesn't play as we all know. For me, projecting a definite "I'm better than you" vibe makes all the magic happen.

Remember, guys, that a woman MUST think you are more valuable than she is in order for her to be attracted to you. If she perceives you as less valuable or in most cases even equal, she must reject you. It's her nature. A women has an innate drive to submit, and she can't do that unless you project that you are above her.
 

cablecow15

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Very nice , can you explain a little on how you "detached" yourself from her

the only thing I can think of is to not pay her any attention , or have very delayed responses to questions or what not
 

Atom Smasher

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cablecow15 said:
Very nice , can you explain a little on how you "detached" yourself from her

the only thing I can think of is to not pay her any attention , or have very delayed responses to questions or what not
Kind of looking around the room, only occasional eye contact (but direct and unflinching when I did), seeming to be almost bored, generally half-heartedly answering her questions as if I were just "putting up with her" and trying to be friendly even though she was on the verge of boring me (she wasn't really... I was only pretending to be). I noticed that I subconsciously did a very slight hesitation before answering her questions, as if I am on my own time frame and will answer if and when I want to. All this was subtle, so take what you are imagining and notch it down to barely perceptable.

Interestingly, I just now re-read your post and see that you yourself mentioned delayed responses. I didn't know you said that. You're on the right track. It's all a big experiment in fun so give it a whirl.

I'm not sure if these tactics I've been stumbling upon (see my "Zero Eye Contact Opener" thread in Tips) are universal in effectiveness or if it's just that I can pull it off because of my personality. I tend to suspect that they are universal but I could be wrong.
 

Eternal_water

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Atom Smasher said:
Kind of looking around the room, only occasional eye contact (but direct and unflinching when I did), seeming to be almost bored, generally half-heartedly answering her questions as if I were just "putting up with her" and trying to be friendly even though she was on the verge of boring me (she wasn't really... I was only pretending to be). I noticed that I subconsciously did a very slight hesitation before answering her questions, as if I am on my own time frame and will answer if and when I want to. All this was subtle, so take what you are imagining and notch it down to barely perceptable.

Interestingly, I just now re-read your post and see that you yourself mentioned delayed responses. I didn't know you said that. You're on the right track. It's all a big experiment in fun so give it a whirl.

I'm not sure if these tactics I've been stumbling upon (see my "Zero Eye Contact Opener" thread in Tips) are universal in effectiveness or if it's just that I can pull it off because of my personality. I tend to suspect that they are universal but I could be wrong.
It makes sense but there seems to be 2 issues, you can only use it situationally like that, where she has to talk to you. You couldn't exactly use disinterest in a bar/club other than by not approaching anyone.

2 it seems like a paradox because you didn't actually get her, you walked away.


How can you get this attitude into a genuine approach.
 

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Ease

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Health staff are trained to be polite and friendly.

Maybe she thought you were annoyed and was trying to ease your mood?


Being rude and disinterested to someone that owes you nothing and isnt obligated to talk to you is never a sufficient and sustainable tactic. There are many ways to skin a cat but this is one of the lesser ways.
 

Nutz

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Ease said:
Health staff are trained to be polite and friendly.

Maybe she thought you were annoyed and was trying to ease your mood?


Being rude and disinterested to someone that owes you nothing and isnt obligated to talk to you is never a sufficient and sustainable tactic. There are many ways to skin a cat but this is one of the lesser ways.
I'm forced to agree. I'm finding faster success and way more investment from women when I move fast, get in their space, and escalate quickly. What really helped me recently with this is when I started using the escalation pointers in the 60 Years of Challenges.
 

HariPoter13

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Nutz said:
I'm forced to agree. I'm finding faster success and way more investment from women when I move fast, get in their space, and escalate quickly. What really helped me recently with this is when I started using the escalation pointers in the 60 Years of Challenges.
Promoting your bullshit material eh Nutz? Good thing you copy pasted that same post in two different threads, now I'm sure it's fucking bullshit.



Atom Smasher said:
That's the attitude that works for me on these silly girls. Yesterday I went into a radiology place to get an x-ray, and a cute Latina was registering me. She took me into a back office, and as an experiment I was very cool and detached with her, almost like I found her to be an annoyance but I was putting up with her. I was on the verge of unfriendly, but not quite.

Naturally I was sitting with legs apart, taking up lots of space, but being quite indifferent toward her, looking off at this and that as I was talking to her.

Now 5 years ago, this girl wouldn't have given me the time of day. Yesterday she was supplicating like nobody's business, working overtime to attain my interest.

To think I've spent 40 years not having a clue that this was what attracts women! All those years I was nice, friendly, and everything society taught me to be, and although I always had a girlfriend, general female acceptance was hard to come by.

Frankly, I would rather just be a decent, friendly guy without all the games, but that doesn't play as we all know. For me, projecting a definite "I'm better than you" vibe makes all the magic happen.

Remember, guys, that a woman MUST think you are more valuable than she is in order for her to be attracted to you. If she perceives you as less valuable or in most cases even equal, she must reject you. It's her nature. A women has an innate drive to submit, and she can't do that unless you project that you are above her.
5 points to you sir.
 

n00bPimp

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Yes, the "I'm better than you" works like a charm for communicating confidence and maintianing the role of leader in the interaction BUT it has to be done in a playful way. If you do it in a serious manner, as if you really are better than them (as humans, we are all equal), you will fail.
 

Atom Smasher

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Ease said:
Health staff are trained to be polite and friendly.

Maybe she thought you were annoyed and was trying to ease your mood?


Being rude and disinterested to someone that owes you nothing and isnt obligated to talk to you is never a sufficient and sustainable tactic. There are many ways to skin a cat but this is one of the lesser ways.
Ahhh... my little gnat is back. Where have you been?

For those of you not in the know, Ease occasionally follows me around and negates whatever I say. I must have hurt his feelings in the past.

Because I'm so kind I will address his concerns. He/she will not understand, but this is for the benefit of others reading.

Around here (NYC suburbs) they must have missed the training. Health staff are generally quite unprofessional and can be very rude and unaware of general manners and professionalism. The professional ones are actually quite rare here, especially the young ones.

If I was being "rude", she would not have been dancing around to gain my approval now, would she? If I had been the old Atom Smasher, as I said above she wouldn't give me the time of day. I turned the tables on her and had her seeking my approval. Not a bad day's work.

I wasn't trying to "close" with her, just experimenting with attraction. I'm fairly sure that at age 54 I've developed the ability to determine the difference between a professional woman who is "trying to ease my mood" as you put it, and a women who is genuinely attracted.

Ease, I've noticed that you are extremely miscalibrated in your understanding of what you read here, because you THINK you have all the answers. I continually see you misunderstanding other's (not just my) posts and assigning them meaning and motivations that just aren't even there.

Take a deep breath and try to determine the ACTUAL meaning of a post before replying in your typically confused fashion. Whatever the heck you're mad about from the past, let it go and stop letting it color your perceptions and responses.
 

Eternal_water

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But still, you can't use that in many situations

I mean you couldn't go up to a girl in a bar say Hi and then look in the other direction ignoring her
 

Atom Smasher

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I understand your point of view, but the main thrust of this thread is not how I specifically related with this particular girl, but rather that you need to approach with the attitude, "I'm better than you".

Why is this? Because we are always at a major disadvantage. We are hard-wired to immediately emotionally (sexually) respond to her appearance, which is a contrivance of make-up, hair style, clothing, etc. We are responding to the affectations of femmininity, and not the natural human being underneath all the facial putty. You know, the person who took a great big, disgusting dump just like you this morning.

Because of this disadvantage, we as a rule have great difficulty avoiding judging ourselves as worthy enough/not worthy enough based almost completely on her appearance and/or projected sexuality. This is a judgment based on nothing more than perceptions that have been manipulated and enhanced by her artificial amplification (or manufacture) of projected sexuality.

To counter this, our job is to humanize her and to:

Value our strength of character above her appearance and sexuality.

The fact is that a woman's power base collapses when humanized, when the illusions of appearance are neutralized. A woman's power is based on manipulation of appearances, by-and-large. Our own power is based on character and personality, things that are forged by taking the hammer to ourselves.

So my point in this thread is that we need to shift the balance of power in our favor. One effective way to do that is to value ourselves above them, thereby restoring natural balance and facilitating her NEED to find a man to submit to.

I'll say it again for emphasis: Most women (feminists included) CRAVE a man who will tame her and value himself above her. A woman cannot be attracted to a man who she sees as lower than her in worth.

Go into the game knowing that you are projecting worth and value, and that any women you interact with is being judged as suitable-unsuitable for you. I contend that this mindset will likely work in club game just as it does in day game (my specialty). At least give it some thought and see if you can calibrate it to work wherever it is you operate.
 

Ease

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Atom Smasher said:
Ahhh... my little gnat is back. Where have you been?

For those of you not in the know, Ease occasionally follows me around and negates whatever I say.

I wasn't trying to "close" with her, just experimenting with attraction. I'm fairly sure that at age 54 I've developed the ability to determine the difference between a professional woman who is "trying to ease my mood" as you put it, and a women who is genuinely attracted.
Wouldn't be so optimistic old acquaintance. I stopped reading this forum because I outgrew it and became bored.

Next time try to close the situation and report it, instead of speculating that she was interested/attracted to you.



Your last post is not great either in my opinion. Why do you neglect your own value? Women are just as interested in men as we are in them.

Be physically appealing, be a confident and alpha character and that is the key to becoming satisfied with females. The steps to reaching these goals are not playing mind games, they are playing sports, working out, socializing and approaching women. You preach the lesser ways to skinning the cat; simply put there are more effective ways.
 

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Well, I definitely agree with the "I'm better than you" vibe. That's the whole "I am the prize" mindset. You don't want to do this in a snobbish way, but more of a quiet confidence that you have higher value. It's almost like you know a secret. This works just as well at putting you in the right frame of mind to interact as it does on her.

As for the cool and detached bit, I'm too naturally cool and detached already. I do better when I'm fully engaged, laser eye contact, higher energy, bold action, etc.

If it's an exceptionally attractive woman, and I know I'm going to be around her on a continual basis, then I usually start out cool and detached. Like I barely notice her. Otherwise I feel like I'm making concessions to her beauty, and I don't want to give off that impression. Talk it up with the other girls, let her think I prefer their company. Then I just gradually let her get to know me.
 

PrettyBoyAJ

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Atom Smasher you are definitely correct. A girl will subconsciously be attracted to a man that has more value then her. The reason this is is because girls are naturally attracted to leader and they need to be lead. If your a man who has a lot of women in his life then that self-detachment in conversations will come naturally and girls will pick up on that easily.
 

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Atom Smasher

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zekko said:
Well, I definitely agree with the "I'm better than you" vibe. That's the whole "I am the prize" mindset. You don't want to do this in a snobbish way, but more of a quiet confidence that you have higher value. It's almost like you know a secret. This works just as well at putting you in the right frame of mind to interact as it does on her.

As for the cool and detached bit, I'm too naturally cool and detached already. I do better when I'm fully engaged, laser eye contact, higher energy, bold action, etc.
Exactly, brother Zekko. You get it, as did many others here, but your articulation in very good.

You're correct in that you don't do it in a "snobbish" way, but rather that it is so obvious that it bears no thought or question, a "secret" as you say. It's a given as much as the sky is blue and the earth is round.

I found your second paragraph interesting. You need to offset that cool and detached vibe because you're naturally that way, and I have to cool down that intense laser eye because I'm naturally that way.

Now that I'm older I've noticed that I've always been an energy vampire (until recently). What I mean is that I was always somewhat reactive with women, on a very deep and subtle level. I was doing what females are supposed to do... yuck! I cringe every time I think of it.

I would always notice a slight change in myself when relating to women, in that I was somehow being guided by their energy and timing instead of mine. I think that came from growing up with 3 sisters, no brothers and a very domineering mom, along with a largely absentee father. A recipe for disaster.

I remember having a sort of "longing" attitude about me that I know showed in my body language. It was almost a telegraphing of my desire for acceptance. I really can't articulate what I mean but it had to do with sucking the energy from women instead of providing it myself. I'll bet some of you guys can relate even if you haven't been able to put your finger on what the problem is. Please excuse me as I need to make a trip to the vomitorium.

OK, all better. Back to following up on Zekko's excellent post, he makes a good point that if we are too intense we need to moderate that with coolness, which is exactly what I'm doing, but to an extreme. That's because the extreme works like magic for me. By the same token, if you are too aloof and detached, more intensity may be called for.

But we can't deny the bottom line... There is a contrived advantage that women have that necessitates sites like this, which is the power of looks and their ability to maximize them. Therefore we must reject that contrivance as worth (because the only real worth of that is sexual and having a trophy to show off), and instead elevate our own worth.

Tell me, reader, what is the worth of your taking the hammer and chisel to yourself every day to make yourself a man of substance? Has it been painful to do so? Has it cost you? Has it cost you discomfort, pain, money, etc.?

You're damn right it has. Even if you're just starting out to improve yourself, you are paying a heavy price to be a man of substance. Assign proper worth to that.Your own character, that you are creating, is an investment in FOREVER. On the other hand, a woman's looks (her only currency) is temporary and fading every day.

What is the worth of that fact?

For you younger guys who are struggling and don't feel you have your act together yet, never forget that there is no actual destination. It is enough to be on the right track, making tiny decisions and corrections every day to better your station in life, whether financial or relational. Assign WORTH to that. If you fall off the track, you haven't failed. You're simply one decision away from getting right back on track. The track is the success, not the destination.

Go into your interactions with women armed with the knowledge that you are forging yourself into a masterpiece. She would in no way be able to understand that concept if it were presented to her, but your own innate knowledge that you are forging yourself and therefore have great worth will cause you to relate to her with a proper relative evaluation of your own worth compared to hers.

She WANTS you to be worth more than she. She NEEDS this. She pines away and longs for a man like YOU, if you will only just recognize the worth of a man's character in relation to face putty and a pretty dress.

Get out there and convey your worth to the world. Convey your worth to females. The secret is that you can do this while still conveying proper humility, kindness, etc. Start to think about how to aceive that balance, but err on the side of: "I'm better than you".

Because guess what, Clyde? Until you shine your light, she thinks she's better than YOU!!
 

Atom Smasher

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PrettyBoyAJ said:
Atom Smasher you are definitely correct. A girl will subconsciously be attracted to a man that has more value then her. The reason this is is because girls are naturally attracted to leader and they need to be lead. If your a man who has a lot of women in his life then that self-detachment in conversations will come naturally and girls will pick up on that easily.
Excellent, PrettyBoy. You're spot-on.

+1 for distilling things down into few words, something I haven't quite learned how to do! ;)
 

loveorlust

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Atom Smasher said:
Remember, guys, that a woman MUST think you are more valuable than she is in order for her to be attracted to you. If she perceives you as less valuable or in most cases even equal, she must reject you. It's her nature. A women has an innate drive to submit, and she can't do that unless you project that you are above her.
Sounds harsh but so true. Women are so different than men. If a man acted like he was above me, he'd be breading an enemy out of me. But with a girl, wow it's so different. So different it's funny. Like you could be very nice and considerate with a girl and next thing you know it's feels like they respect you less. like WTF!!! You're suppose to respect me more! But not the case with girls. It's a shame really, but they do it to themselves lol

Thanks for the post and continued success with women to you.
 

TopGun2000

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keep the frame, be confident, don't let other people affect you whether by their appearance or attitude
 
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