I don´t like her having contact with orbiters

JohnHeaven

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Hi everyone,

I am from another country, so sorry for my english.

I´m 25 and my girlfriend is 22. We are in a relashionship for almost one year. It is great, we understand each other so much, we have very often great sex and everything seems to be cool.
One thing bothers me. From the beginning of the relashionship she was in contact with other man, who wanted or want more than a friendship from her. When I saw these men sending her flirty things online, I started feeling bad. Rarely she is talking to them on the phone. A few months ago she wanted to meet one of them and I said that I don´t like it. She didn´t.

She doesn´t flirt back or writes sexuall stuff. She is saying they are just friends! She also said that she likes the attention. I said that theiy can´t be your male friends because the truth is, that they are still attracted and only write to you everytime because they hope to get more from you. I also said that I have nothing against real male friends, but I´m not cool with you staying in contact with them.

I asked her how she would feel if she was in the situation and she said that she wouldn´t like it and that it isn´t right.

Ok so I told her my opinion about that and she said, she will think about her behaviour.

What do you think about the situation? Should i freeze her a few days? I think I will wait till she will say something about that and if she is cool with my opinion, then I will start seeing her again.

Regards!
 
B

BeDJ

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She will think about her behavior?

You can't verbally put her in a scenario that you are currently in, you have to trigger her feelings. Hang out with existing female friends and make new ones. It'll click in her head that if she doesn't shape up, your female friends may become something more.
 

st_99

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she is 22. get used to it.

calm down and stop being so insecure.

if she fvcks her orbiter then so be it. you did not catch her heart.
try again with someone else.

and like beginingDJ said, game other girls. you are not married yet.
 

bukowski_merit

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JohnHeaven said:
Hi everyone,

I am from another country, so sorry for my english.

I´m 25 and my girlfriend is 22. We are in a relashionship for almost one year. It is great, we understand each other so much, we have very often great sex and everything seems to be cool.
One thing bothers me. From the beginning of the relashionship she was in contact with other man, who wanted or want more than a friendship from her. When I saw these men sending her flirty things online, I started feeling bad. Rarely she is talking to them on the phone. A few months ago she wanted to meet one of them and I said that I don´t like it. She didn´t.

She doesn´t flirt back or writes sexuall stuff. She is saying they are just friends! She also said that she likes the attention. I said that theiy can´t be your male friends because the truth is, that they are still attracted and only write to you everytime because they hope to get more from you. I also said that I have nothing against real male friends, but I´m not cool with you staying in contact with them.

I asked her how she would feel if she was in the situation and she said that she wouldn´t like it and that it isn´t right.

Ok so I told her my opinion about that and she said, she will think about her behaviour.

What do you think about the situation? Should i freeze her a few days? I think I will wait till she will say something about that and if she is cool with my opinion, then I will start seeing her again.

Regards!
I used to be a serial girlfriend stealer! I'm too old for all the sneaking around and such anymore, but I have a lot of insight into what leads a woman to cheat....


The #1 thing??????

Showing jealousy in the form you are displaying!


Either forbidding her from seeing a specific man, or forbidding her from seeing all men doesn't matter.... The result: will be her lacking in respect for you... and seeing the other men as tempting (see: forbidden fruit theory).

When I used to be working on a woman with a boyfriend and trying to break her - I knew sex was 100% the minute she uttered, "my boyfriend told me I'm not allowed to talk to you anymore."...........

Fireworks in my heart launched the minute I heard those word! Suddenly, her and I were a team playing against her boyfriend.

The words were better than, "I love you."

They translated to: "My boyfriend told me to go ahead and fvck you."


All this talking you're doing with her will seriously not help! All you're doing is telling her you're insecure. It's better to feel insecure than to show it.


The solution: If you want a real relationship with a loving woman who won't do things like this - - - pick better women who don't have an army of orbiters... and... learn to lead better...
 

corrector

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Sounds like you are insecure in this relationship. It's best just to break-up with her. This way you will not care what she does with these orbiters.
 

Aristippus

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I think everyone here hit the nail on the head. Another thing. If you find a behavior unacceptable you must have extremely low tolerance for it. And if she doesn't like it and insists, you have to be willing to give her the boot. Be a gentleman and expect nothing less from your woman than the behavior of a lady. She has to love you, respect you, and practically worship the ground you walk on to be considered fitting material for a long-term relationship.
 

GotED?

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The Viagra Pill you wish you had...- United Kingdo
This is all coming down to 'ESTABLISHING YOUR FRAME' in the beginning of a relationship.

This determines if you are Alpha or Beta in the eye of your woman.

It is always almost impossible to change this frame once you lose it in the beginning of a relationship.

Read up on establishing your frame. Never hesitate to walk away from a woman if she doesn't follow your frame. There are too many masculinized women out there who doesn't need to be with men. Neither do you want to be with another man hidden in a woman's body - fighting and power struggling for until the day you break up. What a waste of life and energy.

With respect,

Exodus
 

PrettyBoyAJ

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Just drop her. A girl who truely respects you wont even.entrrtain the thought of communicating with other dudes. I dont see how anyone in a relationship can put up with that disrespect.
 

betablaster

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i regret every second of staying together with my ex after i let it slide that she was talking with orbiter/old flame. Leave her now. it will feel better.
 
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