How to develop plates when in a "monogamous relationship?"

Swede54

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I've learned a lot about myself over the last few years. I've learned is that

1. I don't want kids.
2. I don't want to get married.
3. I need consistent serial monogamy to be at a good level of happiness etc. Just how I am, after 10 years I think that's just how I operate.

Here is my dilemma, and maybe you guys can help me out. Whenever I enter an exclusive relationship most other women sort of "evaporate" because I'm off the market and don't talk to me after. Usually I like my relationships to last 1-2 years, preferably with little gap in between :).

My ideal life set up is 1-2 year relationships with women where I have a friends with benefits mentality. However most women think it's more serious but whatever, that's not my concern. How can I keep spinning plates while being in my relationship, so that when I decide to end it I got options on the table? I hate ending a relationship then starting from square 1 with no women on the burner. You guys know how that is, it can sometimes take forever to get them from scratch. I'm also an entrepreneur that works at home, so I don't get to meet women through work or other things.
 

HeadLightsOn

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Im looking forward to seeing feedback on this scenario, hopefully without any white knight nonsense.
I would've thought that regardless if your relationship status you'd still have to do the same thing. You know, get out meet wonen form bonds, FBs etc. Are you doing any of that or OLD?
 

Swede54

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Im looking forward to seeing feedback on this scenario, hopefully without any white knight nonsense.
I would've thought that regardless if your relationship status you'd still have to do the same thing. You know, get out meet wonen form bonds, FBs etc. Are you doing any of that or OLD?
Usually when I get into a relationship, I'm just too damn lazy to put any effort into getting plates, but I realize I need to start doing it. I would love to be able to pull off the scenarios women do. AKA how they have 20 white knights waiting to give them **** soon as they exit the relationship. I'm looking to live the Bill Maher life. New gf every 1-2 years without having to do this massive amount of work between them because at the end of each relationship I have to start from square 1 aka going to bars and wasting my time with that ****.
 

Poon King

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Usually when I get into a relationship, I'm just too damn lazy to put any effort into getting plates, but I realize I need to start doing it. I would love to be able to pull off the scenarios women do. AKA how they have 20 white knights waiting to give them **** soon as they exit the relationship. I'm looking to live the Bill Maher life. New gf every 1-2 years without having to do this massive amount of work between them because at the end of each relationship I have to start from square 1 aka going to bars and wasting my time with that ****.
You answered your own question: Stop being lazy when you get into a relationship. Never stop meeting new women.

Pretty simple.
 

marmel75

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Well, glad to see you bought a cookie cutter relationship at Wal-Mart. Who the hell seriously looks at things like this?
 

PowerAbuse

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My ideal life set up is 1-2 year relationships with women where I have a friends with benefits mentality. However most women think it's more serious but whatever, that's not my concern. How can I keep spinning plates while being in my relationship, so that when I decide to end it I got options on the table?
Why do you want to drop these women after 1-2 years? Is there some formula, or do you anticipate certain problems happening at that point that would make you assume the FWB relationship would cease?

The only thing I can think of is they develop feelings. But if not, why drop them? And you would get tired after 1-2 years, then why stay with them that long in the first place and waste both her time and yours?

Why can't you just spin multiple plates or be monogamous? The idea that you have to stop seeing someone at some arbitrary point seems a bit weird. And also, you should be clear about it being FWB, and if they see it differently then you're not being straight up. And maybe that's why you feel like you have to bail.

But I'm in a similar boat as you, entrepreneur, work from anywhere... but let's say you had a banging hot wife, that cooked and cleaned and basically took care of you so you could focus on your business... you wouldn't want that? Maybe you're just not meeting quality women or enough women. Try meet ups and Tinder.
 

marmel75

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Maybe you're just not meeting quality women or enough women. Try meet ups and Tinder.
LMAO!! This is the equivalent of saying

"Maybe you aren't meeting quality women. Try going to a wh0re house."

"
 
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RangerMIke

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It's your mindset. You have to have the mindset that you sleep with lots of women. Don't be lazy or complacent... you should have the attitude that you are going to get better everyday... Always be trying to sleep with women. When you are dating women, be honest with them and let them know up front who you are and what you want. You will lose some women that are interested in monogamy... but the women you end up with will be okay with who you are... they'll use you for sex until someone else comes along that will settle down with them... Women like and need sex, they might as well get it from you.

Don't worry about upsetting women you are dating when they know you are with other women. They respond to negative and positive emotions... it is better to give them jealousy and anger, then nothing. I can't tell you how many times I've been with women who storm off mad because I did something to tick them off.... I let them walk away and never contact them, only to have them come back to me and apologize.
 

aforabi

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I am in a similar scenario.

I have a LTR with this gal, and she is really great. When she is not around, i am busy picking up new chicks and trying to bang them. Is it ethical to do this when i am in a relationship? Or, i can keep on playing safe so that she does not know about it? :)
 

PowerAbuse

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I am in a similar scenario.

I have a LTR with this gal, and she is really great. When she is not around, i am busy picking up new chicks and trying to bang them. Is it ethical to do this when i am in a relationship? Or, i can keep on playing safe so that she does not know about it? :)
If you're cool with her picking up dudes to bang when you're not around, then yeah go for it. But if you've told her you guys are exclusive, then I would question your LTR or why you're wasting her time, or why you haven't just been straight up at the start. It's really tough deciding on an open relationship after you've already gone exclusive. You have to establish that frame in the beginning.
 
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