Hot girls

[becker]

Ok, guys, I've honestly hit the mother lode of hot girls. This girl is easily the hottest physical specimen that I've had the opportunity to meet.

She loves to talk and just spilled her guts to me the other day about all sorts of crap. Anyways, she is very sweet, but very hard to get. Don't really know how to approach this one as far as getting her to do anything.

So far, I've asked her to do something and she had some things to do with her family. She just broke up with a BF of 3 years about 3 months ago. This girl can literally get any guy she wants.

I've been pretty good about not hanging around her all the time, but at the same time, it's one of those situations where it seems like if you don't at least maximize the time you are with a girl, other guys will be taking over. It's rare because this girl is like a 10 easily, and those have been the only ones I've been chasing.

I have a ton of 7s and 8s that I've flat out refused to take on because to me it's too dime-a-dozen. I'm seeking the holy grail, and it's difficult as hell. I don't do it for the challenge either, it's more that my thinking right now is that if I'm going to spend any time going after a girl, might as well shoot for the gold.

For those of you who have chased these women, what has been your experiences? I'm doing pretty well right now with this one at the moment, but it's going to take some time, since I've only known her for 2-3 weeks, and have seen her maybe twice a week at most. I've inched my way closer and closer though.

 

[jakethasnake]

She knows you're after her. Totally. Give her some credit, Becker. I would just play it cool, business as usual, you know? And I think you should stop posting about it... it's an indication that you're over-analyzing.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Stole my thoughts right outta my head jakethesnake!!


SHB's need an A+ game and if your already thinking about her after 2 weeks, your headed down the wrong path. Just chill out and hang out with HB's everywhere. If you focus on her too much, you already know what diease you'll catch.


PIMP

 

[becker]

The main thing about this girl is that she seems to have a hard time keeping eye contact with me and nervously spits out sentences when I'm around her.

I don't know if it's too good to make a girl feel like this. I think that I can be a little intimidating sometimes because I am pretty controlled around women and I don't say all sorts of random stuff to avoid silences around them, and I look into their eyes when I speak.

You think that I should keep up the steady persistency or just try to spend less time around her? I'm not a big believer in sitting on my arse and waiting for sh*t to happen.

 

[es_mer8]

The main thing about this girl is that she seems to have a hard time keeping eye contact with me and nervously spits out sentences when I'm around her.

Please, read this thread I whipped up for people just like you:

http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?threadid=40892

 

[becker]

es_mer8,

Your post is good, but that's not my problem here. If you read what I wrote, I approached this girl, I talked to this girl, I asked her out. There was no hesitation or overanalysis on my part. I'm pretty good about not overanalyzing before I approach a girl and ask her to do stuff.

However, after I've asked her, that's when I try to at least get a feel for what she might think of me, especially if she is unable to go. If she really seems that turned off by me, then I won't waste too much more time on her. I don't like to next too soon because in my experience, I've had women who didn't seem interested in me when I first met her, but then liked me after knowing me for a while. These are what I call the more "cautious" types of women, and many of them are like this. They don't want to jump in the pool before knowing that the water is warm.

What happens with me sometimes is that I will ask a girl to do something without really giving her much time. In these cases, I'll give her a second shot, and if there is always an excuse, then you know she probably isn't super interested. I'm not a big believer of the "counteroffer", because it's been my experience that sometimes a girl is a little nervous and won't do this because she isn't thinking straight.

 

[violator]

Becker, your situation is a carbon copy of what I have experienced with these ultra hot girls (9-9.5). Like you I pretty much am not interested in anything less than an 8 other than for a casual lay.

Basically, you have understand that they are getting hit on everyday and can have any guy they want. They know all the pickup lines and tricks guys use to try to get into their panties. What I have noticed is that usually they play along and take advantage of the guys that they are not particularly interested in to get them to do things like buy them drinks, do favors, etc. But, if she sees potential in you, like you are the prize or the high status male, she will put you through a series of tests to see of you are worthy.

First of all, you have to show qualities that make you excellent. It could be your professional status or a particular talent (i,e doctor, lawyer, musician etc.) or something else that sets you part from the others.

Second, you have to be a challenge because that is what sets you apart from most other guys who can't control themselves like calling everyday, supplicating, etc.

Also, you have to show that you are trustworthy and not feeding her a line just to get into her pants like most guys do when they confront a hot babe. Once you show her that you are for real and not some phony, you will have begun to break down her shield. That is why some of these hot women act like real bytches when you first meet them. It is because they assume that you are like the rest of the scrubs that preceeded you. When you earn their trust, these bytches will become some of the sweetest and most down to earth girls you have ever met.

Once you have done all of the above you have to withdraw your attention. That's right, disappear so to speak.
Make her wonder what the fyck happened to you by not contacting her for 2-3 weeks. This shyt really will get under her skin because she is not used to being ignored.

To sum it up:

1. Value
2. Challenge
3. Trust
4. Withdraw

I tried this formula on several hot girls including ones that approached the 10 level and without exception, they all ended up chasing me.

 

[becker]

violator,

You're the man. I'm actually not even interested in a casual lay with an 8 though, since I'm quite the picky bastard right now. I wasn't like this in the past though.

Anyways, you have a great formula there, and I have experienced quite the same thing, but not all the time. Sometimes a HB who I'm interested in won't be interested in me. I think it's a matter of whether they happen to fall for your type.

The thing with this girl right now, however, is that she was never a b**ch to me. She was always very nice, and if anything, she seemed more interested than not. I definitely have the power of professional status that you mentioned.

I believe the skill I need to master which I've gotten pretty good at already is knowing when to shift to being a challenge and disappearing. I can understand what you're saying though, because I think the same way. It's basically the give them what they want and take it away tactic. The other thing is that I never use pick up lines. I don't even know any. I just start talking to them.

So when do you withdraw from the girl? My instinct tells me that for this to work, you need to develop a good enough relationship with her such that if you were no longer in her life, she'd feel like something was missing. Then she'd think about you and would start to wonder. If she barely knows you, I doubt this will work. This means that you need to go through some bonding experiences or share some deep conversation which brings you two closer. Am I wrong? How do you do this without falling into the friends zone?

 

[Craig Reeves]

Hmm...

This sounds to me like you are basing the value and worth of women simply off of their looks. For some reason, you are restricting yourself from approaching anything but 9's or 10's. This is a really common problem that a lot of guys have once they start becoming more successful with women.

It sort of makes sense, right? Before you became successful, 9's and 10's were the women that you couldn't have (at least, THOUGHT you couldn't have). So now that you can actually get them now, it's only natural that you're going to gravitate to them first.

Well.....once you start dating these 9's and 10's and such, you will quickly began to realize that looks aren't everything. My very best relationships have never been with 9's or 10's. Now I'm not saying that 9's and 10's aren't as good as 7's or 8's - what I'm saying is that 9's and 10's are no better than 7's or 8's and vice versa. There are just as many crappy 9's and 10's as there is 7's and 8's.

A lot of guys (especially clubbers) believe that since they are ABLE to get 9's or 10's, then they SHOULD ONLY BE DATING 9's or 10's. They feel as if they have to date "up".

Even the most successful of guys with women will eventually run into that 7 or 8 that they just can't stop thinking about. But they will FORCE themsleves to get over her because they will not be able to impress their friends, or themselves!

There's this girl that goes to my school. She's a fairly good associate of mine. And truth be told this girl isn't really the most attractive woman on the planet. She's 23 years old, but you wouldn't think that if you saw her, she looks about 30 something. She doesn't really hardly dress to impress either. If you guys were to see her, she'd be about a 7, and that's kind of pushing it a bit.

However, I swear that there is just something very, very, sexy about her personality. She's so calm and laid back and charming - there's two guys that like her and she's always dating somebody all the time.

That's just one example, and I know a lot of you guys out there can relate.

The reason that most of us have taken the time out to learn about interacting with women was to FREE ourselves from any limitations of who we can date, or have a relationship with. So if you only limit yourself to 9's or 10's you are doing the exact same thing that you were trying to stop yourself from doing by getting educated.

 

[becker]

Craig,

Good post. I think you're right in many ways. I started getting more ambitious when I started having girls hit on me.

However, let me tell you, they never really started hitting on me until I started to increase my physical appearance. Dressed better, fixed my hairstyle so it was very up to date, etc. Personality sort of changed later, after girls started to notice more.

Don't forget the whole "eye of the beholder" thing, because this girl you mention who is a 7 may be a 9 or 10 in someone else's book. Probably the only way to get a gauge of this is to maybe have you rate someone that is famous, like my favorite, Jessica Alba. To me, she's a 10.

It's funny, because this girl who I'm talking about right now is probably not my normal type of girl. She has one of those large tattoos above her butt, I believe she has a pierced tongue, but I haven't been able to tell, she has like 3 piercings on each ear, she dyes her hair, wears tight clothes (with an amazing body I have to add), and overall, seems wild but is actually very sweet when I talk to her. It's just that her face is so crazy gorgeous that I can't help but be attracted to her. Seems very superficial, but like I said, she's quite sweet on top of it, and not a b**ch at all.

 

[CLOONEY]

Dont deny this and try to argue with me, but you are on your way (maybe already there) to infatuation.

I have dated a "few" of these babes, that all the other guys are chasing. Let me tell u, they are boring as hell some of them because their imagine is all they are about, a couple I have found are the funniest, nicest, craziest chicks I have ever met, however due to me being an assho*le and wanting to find the PERFECT chick, which I highly doubt I will ever find, none of them have ever worked out with me longer than a one year relationship. You want to know how to "get her", play your game as jake said. Seriously if she likes you, you will be able to tell, these "hot chicks" make it VERY obvious when they like a guy. Then u just gotta close. Ask her out, 3 months is plenty of time to get over her boyfriend. If she rejects you, simple, she doesnt like you, forget her. And seriously dude, dont wait longer, then another guy WILL close on her and u will DEFINATELY loose her.

Dont be intimidated, just get the digits and give her a call. As I think Jake said "business as usual".

 

[becker]

Nice, CLOONEY. You're probably right about me being on the way to infatuation, I won't deny it.

This girl is very sweet, and aside from a slightly screwed up home life (parents just divorced because her mom was a little nutty), she'd be perfect. I'm not totally into wild girls, but she's probably the exception because I think her image is wilder than how she really is. I don't know though, the piercings and tattoo always throw up red flags for me.

However, I'm not sure how much these women always make it clear that they like you. I've had women make it clear that they like me, but they've all been the extremely friendly type who are super-outgoing. This girl is a little more reserved and in our office, which occupies 2 stories of a building, so it's pretty large, she hangs out with like 2 people, this older lady who is a friend of her mother's, and this other guy, who is constantly with her during lunch, on breaks, etc., but I'm sure isn't her BF, although they might have dated (who knows).

Anyways, so far this girl has not given me any real surefire signs of disinterest, such as saying that she's dating another guy, or anything like that. Her last BF was extremely jealous, and didn't even let her work because he was afraid she would meet some other guy, and he just paid for everything so she wouldn't have to work. She told me they broke up because she took this job. Crazy relationship, and at the extreme. However, they were together for 3 years, and I'm wondering if it was because he was spending all this cash on her. Doesn't seem like she'd do that kind of thing, but I'm not going to rule it out.

 

[violator]

Clooney I agree with you that some of these hot bytches can be quite boring. In fact I dumped one of the hottest girls I have ever gone out with because of this. It goes to show that a hot chick with little or no persoanality will get her only so far. I guess the same thing works with good looking guys.

I disagree with you however, the the hot chicks make it obvious that they like you. In fact the hotter they are the more coy and challenging they seem to be. It is indeed rare that a really hot chick would be up front in revealing her feelings.

Becker, I would tread cautiously with this chick. She may appear sweet and wholesome, but you really never know what her background is. Her tatoos and piercings should be a red flag because these types of girls tend to have some serious issues hiding behind them.

 

[becker]

violator,

I see the really hot girls the same way you do. I have rarely been ignored by them since I think it's very strong to be able to just walk up and maintain eye contact with them as though it was nothing, and just talk. I have that part down.

What I don't have down pat is being able to decide when to continue the pursuit and when to back off, and if there are other guys, whether to back off at all. To me, backing off may not mean cutting off all contact, but perhaps making every minor contact memorable. If you see her only for like 1 minute at a time, like passing through the office, make sure she laughs every time she sees you, that sort of thing. I've gone around doing magic tricks for women in the office, and I'll just do it, and leave, and they'd be talking about it all day.

I also wanted to say that yes, I'm a little hesitant with this girl if only for the reason that she seems to have some issues. Bottom line is that her mom was crazy (heard voices, thought people were out to get her, etc.). I'm hoping that that's the extent of it. She is very close to her father, and she told me the other day that she just doesn't want to ever do anything that would make him think poorly of her. Dad has a GF who was living in their house, who is now moving out. Pretty heavy duty stuff, but I still want this girl. I guess it's just because she's so damn hot that I'm blinded right now.

 

[becker]

Ok, so here's another thing. What if I were to take this girl out to lunch. Should I be paying for her (normally I'd just pay because it's awkward to split the bill if you do the inviting)?

The problem here is that she was telling me how her ex-BF didn't let her work, etc., and paid for everything, and she got used to it. Then she said that now, she's working and paying for her stuff herself.

Is the better move to pay, and risk seeming like her ex-BF who paid for everything, or not pay, and seem like a total cheapskate? I would think that in this situation, not paying would work only if coupled with a really good C+F line. Any suggestions?

 

[CLOONEY]

I would pay for the first few dates, its the man thing to do, after that once u feel more comfortable around her tell her to pay half. Simple! As for you dont think they make it clear, oh yes they do, she will laugh at your jokes and look at you from distances while she is not directly talking with you, when you are sitting next to her, she will probably play with her hair etc, these are the signs to look for. If you dont think they are making it obvious enough and they just seem like they are being friendly with you like most other people, then it is probably because she DOESNT like you. If I were you I would just close, u have nothing to loose.

Oh and as for the tatoo and peircing thing, who cares dude, just date her and then u will find out. Stop thinking one step ahead of yourself, first you have to ACTUALLY ask for the digits. First things first man.

 

[jakethasnake]

This thread should have been closed after my first post. LOL!! That was pretty much the only thing that becker needed to hear, and he said so himself, when he agreed with CLOONEY (and CLOONEY's assessment was an echo of my sentiments).


You guys are ridiculous...

 

[becker]

Hey jake, stop ruining our fun, will ya?

I'm going to ask this girl out on Monday. I'll ask for her number, which I never felt I needed since I could see her every day if I wanted to. I think I'll hold off and just talk to her in person instead. I'm better face-to-face with these HBs than I am on the phone.

I think this girl does most of the stuff you say, violator, but I need to pay a little more attention and observe a little more so I can know for sure. What if she has very good eye contact but she breaks it before you do, or talks without looking right at you (but seems like she's more nervous than anything else), or she has candy and keeps grabbing for it while she talks to you? All look like good signs to me, but I don't want to make her feel so nervous that she's uncomfortable, do I?