Girlfriend is going away for 3-6 months. how to keep interest level?

quest

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my girlfriend has a new job. seasonal work. about 5 hours drive from where i live. we've been going out for a solid 2 months (seeing each other a month before that.) things are traveling quickly and we get on really great. her interest level is very high.

but during her time working in this new job, she'll be living with 2 male friends, and meeting many others while i'm back home. now she says she'll come back sorta every 2nd or 3rd weekend, i'm assuming it'll be more likely every 5th or 6th weekend. i'll probably go up for a few days (but that would be within the first month to fit in with my university course.)

as my subject line suggests, how do i keep up her interest level? i'm a tonne of fun in person, very funny and playful etc. she loves it. but over the phone i'm dead ****.. i hate talking on the phone, i can't see how i'll be able to keep her interest level high?

i need some help fellas.
 

Dirtheart

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It's difficult, but you have to make her miss you. Whatever you do don't saturate her with emails, letters and phonecalls. The best thing you can do is hold back on all of these, act like you are busy and keep her wondering what you are up to.

If you are constantly in contact with her, you'll put her mind at rest and she'll get on with her day without thinking of you. The longer she waits for you to call/email, the longer she will be thinking about you.
 

netman

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I'm in sort of the same situation, and I think Dirthheart's advice is right on the money. My girl is a million miles away right now, but she's been sending me e-mails and calling me at least once or twice a day, while I'll only e-mail her to respond to her e-mails and I haven't called at all, and her IL can't be any higher.
 

diplomatic_lies

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"B*tch, LOOK at another guy and you will never look again...."

One email, guarenteed to ensure your girlfriend remains loyal.
 

sux2bu

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Originally posted by diplomatic_lies
"B*tch, LOOK at another guy and you will never look again...."

One email, guarenteed to ensure your girlfriend remains loyal.
Please tell me that was sarcasm.
 

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You have been seeing this girl including actual dating time for 3 solid months not years right. So for 3 months your willing to sit at home and twiddle your thumbs and hope this woman is being faithful to you...correct.

I want you to go to this website:

www.hoslap.net

and slap ya self silly.


Your willing to keep a girl that you've only known a total of 3 months.....after she is moving away for maybe 6 months and will be living with 2 other dudes and meeting lots of other dudes....

YOUR WILLING TO WHAT!!!!!

That's sad man. This is why this site needs to be divided.

Players and Don Juans on one side

And LTR's programmed fellows on another side.

Ok now that I'm through with being shocked and I've puked all over my nightie...lol

Keep livin ya life kid. Don't worry about what she is going to be doing out there...don't call her in the middle of the night to see if she answeres cause your only going to get your feelings hurt...she will of course have some excuse as to why she couldn't answer right about at the end of month number 1.

Get out there and do as this site teaches you: Meet women!

You don't have to fixiate on just one at this point. Date lots of women:

"When you date only a few women you will fall prey to misconceptions and bitter downward spirals of attitudes which will block your ability to meet other women. When you date a lot of women you have the ability to learn more about what does and doesn’t work for you. You have the option of finding those traits that you desire vs those that don’t work for you. Thereby you learn to take control of your whole dating life.

-The Dating Black Book
 
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Something that you will NEVER hear PuertoRican_Lover say, "My girl will be living with 2 male friends"

A girl that lives with men is every body's girl and not just yours. Leave this ho do what she has to do and quit obsessing as if she is your wife. Do as Player said and date other women - this is only fair game since your ho is LIVING with other men!!!!!

You young bastards love to get disrespected!!!!!! Keep your dignity Bro!!!

Don't call her ever!!!
 

Click Here

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Keep your life extremely busy. As long as she doesn't think your waiting by the phone thinking about her she's going to be wondering about how to keep your interest level up.

my .2
 
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Originally posted by Click Here
Keep your life extremely busy. As long as she doesn't think your waiting by the phone thinking about her she's going to be wondering about how to keep your interest level up.

my .2
Worth more than 2 cent's this is a whole dollars worth!
 

NewMan

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Here ya go...

From experience:-

This is the timeline of what will happen:-

1) weeks 1 and 2.
She will email and call you every day. She'll even cry on the phone to you - tell you how much she loves you - and how this place stinks. How these 2 guys she's living with are a##holes and she really doesn't like them. How she can't wait to see you again - wants you to be there - and can't wait to leave.

2) Weeks 3 - 4.
The calls will slow. No crying. Emails will be every other day. She's meet some friends and she's socializing. It turns out that this place isn't as bad as all of that. You'll still keep calling her and emailing her every day. But now she's not responsing as quickly. She's busy at work so can't return calls. She reassures you that everything is cool - and that she's still coming home this weekend. She doesn't - because on of her new friends is having a party and she really wants to go. You'll except that - but inside your stomach is turning over.

3) weeks 5 - 6
She doesn't return your calls the same day. Hardly ever send an email anymore. when she does send it - it's short and sweet. The I love you at the end of the conversation is helf hearted. She's going to parties, to bars, dancing - bowling to the movies. You let's it slip that one of her new friends is a guy. But it's cool because he's got a GF at home to. And he misses her like crazy. You suck it up some more - and about this time call her at 11pm on a Saturday night. She doesn't answer - so you call every half an hour between now and 3 am. You can't sleep - your wondering where she is. You finally leave her a message telling her you just got back from this really fun party - when in reality you've been home alone all night. She finally calls you the next afternoon. She'll give you some BS excuse that you'll eat up - but deep down you know it's BS.

From here it gets worse before it get's better. You'll think about her all the time, wonder what she's doing, where she is - and she's always out. Eventually she'll give you the "Let's be friends" routine because she's away and doesn't have the time or energy to keep this thing going. By this time she's lost all respect for you - your phone calls - questioning - demands - emails - and general AFC attitude has driven her so far away. The new guy is tapping her A## - he's there with a GF at home - and he's playing both of them. He'll fvck the hell outta your girl - she'll think this guy is the sh#t - and that he actually wants a relationship with her - which is wrong. He play her like a fiddle.


Your probably still doubting this. but it will happen.

Take the advice above and go find yourself other chicks tonight.
 

quest

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well guys.. i appreciate your input.. some what i wanted to hear. and some i didn't want to hear.

the 2 guys she will be living with she's been friends with for a few years..

as strange as this may sound, i'm not actually that hung up on this girl.. i could never see her again, and sure it'd hurt me for maybe 2-3 days.. but i'd be over it very quickly..

i've never had trouble getting with girls, and i know that i'll be better for what i've learnt from this girl..
but things are pretty sweet right now..
i won't be sitting at home waiting around for her on friday saturday nights..
i'll be back in the game... i am not 100% against cheating, but i'm 100% against getting caught.. so i wouldn't even cheat infront of my mates.. i won't be actively searching for a new girl, but if i find one, see ya later snow queen..

she called me last night and was crying about how much she loved me, etc. and she hasn't even left yet..

i was stupid.. like 2 weeks or 1 month into going out she asked "will u stay with me if i work up at the snow?" i wanted to get a **** so i wanted to be sweet and i said "yes of course.. blah blah blah" mistake #1, and kinda uncoverable.. i know this is a recipe for disaster, but i could handle it well if it goes that way..

i'd just be pissed if she was hooking up with guys but not telling me, cause then i'd be wasting time down here instead of being right back into the game..
 

sux2bu

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^^^What NewMan said.
 

Juan_Man

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I know a guy who has been abroad for three months. His girl is making nice with some guy here on campus. Women can't stand to be alone. Think about it.
 

fieldman12

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Hey, all these guys are telling you the truth. Let me tell you my story. I had this good looking girl leave to be in Iraq about four months ago. Now when she was here we where great together. I never called her to much or was needy of her. She even told me that once. She was great untill the week before she had to leave for Iraq. Suddenly she was busy before she had to leave for Iraq and could not let me see her any that week, but would call. I could tell she was waaaaayy different but still a little caring. You know when she once got over their she always said that she was busy and did not have much time to e-mail. She was very short with her e-mails. I told my buddy the week before she left that I knew she was going to break up with me, but told him I will wait till she does it. I tried to be understanding of her since where she was and all that she had and was going through. I sent her an e-mail about once a week telling her about what was going on and telling her I missed her. I could tell it was over. She talked to me more like a friend than a bf. She did not have any sweet things in her e-mail to say to me, like calling me honey, darling, or I care about you. She would only reply to certain e-mails. I stood behind her because I felt I was standing behind my country. When she finally broke it off in an e-mail I told her I knew she was going to do this for two months. I told her how I stood behind her and all that . I told her I dont hate her, but I told her she done me wrong, and I pointed out all the stuff that she done that I did not like. I told her that I loved her and cared for her, and wish that she comes back instead of choosing full-time in military. I offered to help her with her problems if she needed help, but told her I was worried about her, not us being together. I truely beleive at times girls punish their self on purpose. if I had to do over I would not send her an e-mail one. She promissed me that she was coming back and that we where going to Hawaii. I guess what I am saying is go find another woman. I started looking for girls two days before she told me that she was breaking up with me. I have dated 4 girls since our breakup a little over a month ago. I have not contacted her once since I told her all this stuff about how I saw she was. Yes, I may have ruined ever being with her again, but I dont care. I stood by her in her time overseas in the military and I got nothing for it except a boot in the butt. She will make this right or I wont talk to her. I had actually four dates with four different girls the same weekend. I dont need a girl that will flake out and disrespect me.. Find another girl. No matter what, never be needy of a woman.
 
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WaterTiger

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Seasonal work for 3-6 months....five hours away???


Quest...if she had a high interest in you she'd have found something closer to you. Don't tell me this was the only job she could find. You're dumped and don't even know it.
 
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So true Water Tigress,

Quest, if you were into a girl would you move 5 hours away??? NO! Unless of course it was over or you want it to be over!
 

quest

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ok..
this has obviously been on my mind alot..
and i think i can do one of three things..

1) break up with her, good terms - no point not being friends.
2) break up with her, with the intent of getting back together when she's back.. sorta say, well we're both single now, but don't act on it unless u wanna end the chance of us ever being back together including one night stuff..
3) stay with her and hope she doesnt **** me over..

its kinda too late to say "you have so stay" as i let her go for the interveiw and do this and this and this.. but u guys are telling me pretty much exactly what i'm expecting to hear.. and i'm probably reacting in the way an AFC would, she's different, we're different. and maybe we are? i don't know..
i need advice on what to do, and how is the nicest way of doing it? because i've reassured her so many times that i won't break up with her...


and what do i do if she says she wants to stay? (which she has said she would do if i were to break up with her for the reason of her leaving)
 

OpenMind

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Women with HIGH INTEREST in you do not move away.... simple as that
 

Cremasta

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Originally posted by Click Here
Keep your life extremely busy. As long as she doesn't think your waiting by the phone thinking about her she's going to be wondering about how to keep your interest level up.
Click is on the right track... just to expand on that a bit more. Don't just make your life busy, make it FUN as hell!

You'll be having fun and not thinking about her all the time, she will be wondering how you can be having so much fun without her AND it will give you something interesting to talk about during those phone calls you hate so much!

Don't go through the drama of breaking up with her, what's the point of that? Just shag her silly before she goes and then leave it all up in the air, don't commit to anything. You have only been together 2 months so I doubt there is an engagement ring in the picture (at least I hope not). She is miles away, she will do her thing and there is nothing you can do about that so why stress? Just don't let it stop you from doing your thing.
 
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