Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Girl acting hot and cold what’s my next move ?

Jaydza1992

New Member
Joined
Sep 27, 2022
Messages
3
Reaction score
2
Age
27
So I was seeing this girl 6 months ago but my crazy ex was still involved and lingering trying to sabotage it. We recently started talking again and I arranged a date in the next few days which she agreed upon but her replies are now being long and cold. Like today I sent her a snap saying about The date what we should do and then she didn’t reply left me on unread for 10 hours whilst uploaded story’s so I just deleted the chat and she sent a message saying “Fxck you then ?” like wtf did I do wrong like why’s this girl agree on a date then act cold. So I replied “I’m not like these other guys I’m not gonna be begging for you” then she wrote back saying “shut up yes you are” I don’t want to message her back for talking to me rude like that nor I don’t want to ghost her. Ffs it’s a sticky one
 
Last edited:

oldmanofthesea

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 23, 2018
Messages
1,596
Reaction score
3,210
Age
46
I arranged a date in the next few days which she agreed upon but her replies are now being long and cold
Stop initiating conversation after the date it setup. Save the conversation for the date. You may be coming off as needy.

Like today I sent her a snap saying about The date what we should do and then she didn’t reply left me on unread for 10 hours
1. Never ask a girl what you should do on a date. Be a man. Be the leader. Girls don't want to be asked where they want to go or what they want to do. They want YOU to make that decision. If they don't like what you propose, they may discuss it with you, but they don't want to be asked what they want to do. They see this as very weak and lame.
2. She is likely testing you to see how you handle emotions........

so I just deleted the chat and she sent a message saying “Fxck you then ?”
...... to which you failed.
 

Jaydza1992

New Member
Joined
Sep 27, 2022
Messages
3
Reaction score
2
Age
27
Stop initiating conversation after the date it setup. Save the conversation for the date. You may be coming off as needy.



1. Never ask a girl what you should do on a date. Be a man. Be the leader. Girls don't want to be asked where they want to go or what they want to do. They want YOU to make that decision. If they don't like what you propose, they may discuss it with you, but they don't want to be asked what they want to do. They see this as very weak and lame.
2. She is likely testing you to see how you handle emotions........



...... to which you failed.
is there anyway back from it ?
 

BDDazza

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 10, 2010
Messages
139
Reaction score
74
So I was seeing this girl 6 months ago but my crazy ex was still involved and lingering trying to sabotage it. We recently started talking again and I arranged a date in the next few days which she agreed upon but her replies are now being long and cold. Like today I sent her a snap saying about The date what we should do and then she didn’t reply left me on unread for 10 hours whilst uploaded story’s so I just deleted the chat and she sent a message saying “Fxck you then ?” like wtf did I do wrong like why’s this girl agree on a date then act cold. So I replied “I’m not like these other guys I’m not gonna be begging for you” then she wrote back saying “shut up yes you are” I don’t want to message her back for talking to me rude like that nor I don’t want to ghost her. Ffs it’s a sticky one
I don't believe she is interested in you anymore.

As you said you recently started talking again so I presume there was a long hiatus. In that period she has probably met somebody else and is focusing her attention on him. She is looking for an excuse to distance herself from you, hence her replies becoming long and cold. The fact she swore at you shows her low level of respect and attraction towards you.


For the record, I don't agree with the others saying you should not message a girl before the date. If she likes you she will reply, every time
 

Warning!

Do not subscribe to The SoSuave Newsletter unless you are already a chick magnet!

The information in each issue of The SoSuave Newsletter is too powerful for most guys to handle. If you are an ordinary guy, it is not for you. It is meant for the elite few. Not the unwashed masses.

If you know you can handle it...

If you already have girls calling you at all hours of the day and night, showing up at your door, throwing themselves at you everywhere you go...

Then sign up below.

But if you're just an average Joe, an ordinary guy, no one special – then skip this. It is not for you.

Chilimili

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 25, 2021
Messages
189
Reaction score
90
So I was seeing this girl 6 months ago but my crazy ex was still involved and lingering trying to sabotage it. We recently started talking again and I arranged a date in the next few days which she agreed upon but her replies are now being long and cold. Like today I sent her a snap saying about The date what we should do and then she didn’t reply left me on unread for 10 hours whilst uploaded story’s so I just deleted the chat and she sent a message saying “Fxck you then ?” like wtf did I do wrong like why’s this girl agree on a date then act cold. So I replied “I’m not like these other guys I’m not gonna be begging for you” then she wrote back saying “shut up yes you are” I don’t want to message her back for talking to me rude like that nor I don’t want to ghost her. Ffs it’s a sticky one
don’t respond walking away is the only option here and to restore respect again. She is totally disrespecting you dude, if you tolerate that **** she will of course not date You
 

Stuffnu

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 2, 2014
Messages
454
Reaction score
602
Age
39
It’s been said time and time again. Mirror her actions.
if she’s hot, its okay to reciprocate but not instigate.
If she’s cold. go colder. .
 
Last edited:

Sleeperhead

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 12, 2022
Messages
36
Reaction score
35
Age
27
So I was seeing this girl 6 months ago but my crazy ex was still involved and lingering trying to sabotage it. We recently started talking again and I arranged a date in the next few days which she agreed upon but her replies are now being long and cold. Like today I sent her a snap saying about The date what we should do and then she didn’t reply left me on unread for 10 hours whilst uploaded story’s so I just deleted the chat and she sent a message saying “Fxck you then ?” like wtf did I do wrong like why’s this girl agree on a date then act cold. So I replied “I’m not like these other guys I’m not gonna be begging for you” then she wrote back saying “shut up yes you are” I don’t want to message her back for talking to me rude like that nor I don’t want to ghost her. Ffs it’s a sticky one
I've been in this situation before. Going no contact only works to get her back into a conversation.

Where you screwed up was once you deleted the snap you backed down. You communicated to her that you weren't happy that she didn't respond, but you didn't confront her directly about this. I would've gone "oh that got a response out of you" then she would've come out with some bull**** excuse to which you don't back down and call it out as a lie and demand to know if she wants to go out or not.

She either agrees to go out or she doesn't and you're not stuck playing stupid games and you can move on. A girl would rather string you along and not reveal her true interest level to keep you invested.
 

Cerwin Vega

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 29, 2014
Messages
647
Reaction score
129
Location
EU
It’s been said time and time again. Mirror her actions.
if she’s hot, its okay to reciprocate but not instigate.
If she’s cold. go colder. .
Classical conditioning. If she does something you like = acknowledge that, and reward her for that. Don't make the link too obvious though.

Additionally, if she does something you dislike = DO NOT acknowledge that. Withdraw your attention, and lower her status in your head. Depending on how bad is it, next her.
 

RangerMIke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 23, 2014
Messages
4,343
Reaction score
6,751
Location
USA, Louisiana
The OP lost his cool. Deleting a chat is something an emotional chick would do. Stop that sh1t.

What he did wrong:

(1) Asking chicks out via social media is a poor substitute for picking up the phone and calling her. If you don't have her phone number... ask for it.... if she won't give it to you... move on. Anyway, since I haven't seen the chat I have no idea what the OP asked her. Did he send her a date request with a specific time/place/activity? Or did he send a ubiquitous "Let's hang out sometime" request.

(2) Instead of deleting the 'chat', he should have left it the way it was. Then if she ever got back with him he should have just said he made other plans when he didn't hear from her. That's it....

(3) Having said that... the chick had little interest in meeting up. I woman that is interested would not have made you wait 10 hours. There really is nothing you can 'do' to change her mind.

(4) Don't be a d1ck, just don't put up with stuff like this. Dating is supposed to be fun, all this silly mind games isn't any fun... just go find women that are fun and ignore women like this.

(5) Having said all that, again... there is nothing you can do about a chick that isn't interested in you enough to respect you. If you are not getting respect then just walk away and ignore her... that's it.

I am not suggesting men should tolerate this... all I'm saying is the proper way to deal with this is not waste time and emotional energy on women that will not give you the time of day...
 

Jaydza1992

New Member
Joined
Sep 27, 2022
Messages
3
Reaction score
2
Age
27
So today was the day I was meant to be going out on a date with her and I haven’t messaged her. so I’m leaving it as that. The thing is when we was seeing eachother before the girl was constantly on her phone instant replies from her. I think her level of interest aint the same anymore or she’s talking to someone else. Either way Fxck her. Thanks for all your responses I appreciate it
 

sangheilios

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 25, 2018
Messages
1,696
Reaction score
1,503
Age
32
@Jaydza1992

It's pretty obvious you aren't going to get anywhere with this woman, especially after the conversation you quoted on the post. I don't mean any of this to put you down, I'd just suggest totally moving on from this and focusing on other things. One of the biggest problem men have in the modern dating market is chasing women that are behaving in a luke warm way that ultimately is just them getting lead on.

In the past, if a woman gave you her number, an actual one, it meant that she was interested in you to some degree and would be open for further communication, going out on a date, etc. Today, many women give out their numbers or social media accounts to men they have no interest in. Why they do this I'm not entirely sure, I personally feel it's a combination of wanting/needing attention and validation but also because many women lack the ability to properly reject men.

For instance, back in 2018 I approached this woman at the gym I frequented then that very often made eye contact, etc. Like any man, this would normally be recognized as a sign of interest. Anyway, I approach her and we have a short interaction that was a bit awkward on her end but I decided to ask for her number and then says she has a boyfriend. I then say "Ok, well it was nice to meet you" and walked away. This woman then proceeded to go out of her way to engage with me, smile, flirt, etc., so I decided to try again and she shot it down. Immediately after this she completely stopped this behavior. This is an example of a woman that not only does not know how to reject a man properly but also behaves in a manner that leads him on for nothing more than attention.

I've been out of the game for well over 3 years now, but my default strategy would be to have a very sensitive rejection radar with any woman that is putting up any resistance or wasting my time. I'd immediately next them and move on, I have too much going on in my life to waste time on time wasters.
 

BackInTheGame78

Moderator
Joined
Sep 10, 2014
Messages
8,387
Reaction score
8,406
This girl has your hamster spinning OT and she knows it.

Fair play to her. You need to work on yourself bro, she smells weakness and neediness.
 

image

Put away your credit card.

You can now read our detailed guide to women and dating for free - Right Here!

Joined
Aug 5, 2022
Messages
155
Reaction score
114
Age
31
Brother, go hit the weights and the pull up bar. Go for a run. Pray.
Rinse off that female from your mind
Do your integrity a solid one and walk.
 

Dragonfly

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 27, 2022
Messages
25
Reaction score
16
Location
California
Do an Iceberg Slim if you have read that book.

If i needed that babe in my rotation, i would be ice cold and heartless with unshakable words. Also I’d tell her I’d beat her ass if she wants to stay with me.

I’ve done this before and it puts problematic women in her place but it also says a lot about her. If you need to verbally freeze a babe and use wordings like you are a badass and abusive pimp, and she lays back and lets that ride, she has likely been with a pimp in her past.
 

Cerwin Vega

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 29, 2014
Messages
647
Reaction score
129
Location
EU
So today was the day I was meant to be going out on a date with her and I haven’t messaged her. so I’m leaving it as that. The thing is when we was seeing eachother before the girl was constantly on her phone instant replies from her. I think her level of interest aint the same anymore or she’s talking to someone else. Either way Fxck her. Thanks for all your responses I appreciate it
No sh1t, captain
 

Rainman4707

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 30, 2012
Messages
1,386
Reaction score
405
No question. Delete her number. I detest this kind of childish behaviour from women. My finger would hit the delete button so fassstt.
 
Top