GF broke up with me but wants to "date"

[Viper423]

Ok, so my girlfriend broke up with me a few days ago because she told me that she needed her space and felt smothered and doesn't want to be serious with anyone for a long time, she doesn't want to be tied down. She told me that she doesn't want me out of her life and still wants to "date". Meaning we both date each other and other people. I told her yes because I love her too much and don't want to lose her for good. She also said that we never know what the future holds and when she's ready to be serious again maybe we'll give it another try. What should I do, i already told her yes?

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by Viper423
I told her yes because I love her too much

Talk about jamming a rusty butter knife into your own eye. All this will accomplish is hurting you worse. You might have an okay time of it if you didn't care about her too much, but you already said that you do. Moving on is the only way to get over this.

It's like this: She wants to keep "dating" you while you're broken up so she can dangle you along as her second- or third-string boyfriend. Any time someone else comes up, you are once again nothing to her. You say that you can both date other people, but it's plain to see that you would not (you "love her too much") and it's also plain to see that you would be on the ledge of a tall bridge if you saw her with another guy.

Drop this now and save your dignity and your heart.

 

[Miles Davis]

Yeah, I second what GC said. You might think all is well now if you continue like this, but you'll feel it later. BELIEVE ME. Just focus on moving forward. Speaking from experience...

 

[Naked_Elephant]

Wakey wakey, eggs and bakey.

Read your own post imagining you're someone else.

This girl is having no consideration of your feelings. She knows what she is doing is going to hurt you. Regardless of the reason why she might be doing this (could it be a test? let the more experienced guys answer that question, I don't think I can), what you have to do is the same thing:

Drop it. Keep contact to as little as basic manners and respect allow. Date her sister if she's hot, or her mum. It's just fair after what she's done to you.

Have fun, be a man and move on.

 

[Fenderules]

Viper! i remember all the posts about your girlfiend b4. Man DONT DO IT! i'll give you severl reasons why:



i remeber you were wondering if your girl cheated cause she felt loose and then got all paranoid.



well........she is prolly dating another guy so to speak. or did and she might have some feelings for you and wants to keep you around. Or she might want to use you as an emotonal tampon/boytoy for her. Either way, when another guy comes into the picture.........your out!



if i were you i'd tell her that we could not go backwards. thats not fair after you developed feelings for her. How will you feel when she starts dating other guys and ****ing with them if not already? trust me it will happen and she will ditch you. As far as im concerned she is being just as bad as cheating. perhpas this is her excuse so she can cheat. It is none the less cheating to me since you shared a close bond togothor



the other reasons i see why you must not do it is:


from your actions i can see you are AFCish with her. Your actions previously have prolly lead her to be this way towards you. (its not your fualt she is doing this, but your afc ways contributed). the same bull**** is just gonna happen. YOur gonna care about her, and she does not for you. You will care about her more and drive her away while she goes have fun with other guys.




GET RID OF HER! i can tell from her actions you can do a LOT better. start dating other girls now. you will realize what you missed. From her actions she is NO good. Trust me man, you may be blinded because you have feelings but you are better then her. She is dirty what she did to you and cold hearted *****.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Guys, listen to what you're saying. Don't any of you have any imagination?

Viper, you are in a bad situation and normally a guy shouldn't be in the position you are in now. But since you're there why not make it worth your while?

If she wants to date you, fine; let her. However, she takes you out. Let her make the date, pick you up and pay for dinner, movies or whatever.

She probably won't go for it so she'll break it off cleanly, which would be good. BUT if she goes for it, WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF GIGOLOS! Nobody said that guys couldn't be professional daters. If she wants your company, let her pay for it!

 

[Fenderules]

thats not a bad idea. the only thing i'd worry about is oneitis which he clearly has

 

[belividere]

I haven't read your other posts but If you really are in love then start getting over it now and give up on her. Sounds harsh but what she will do is even harsher. If you can handle it then just set up the friends with benefits thing, string her along for awhile find someone new and then leave her.

 

[Adrian]

Ok, so my girlfriend broke up with me a few days ago because she told me that she needed her space and felt smothered and doesn't want to be serious with anyone for a long time, she doesn't want to be tied down.

Typical wh0re talk. Everytime a girlfriend has said this to me it was simply because she wanted to go have her little slutty adventures for some time and then later on in the future she unexpectedly tries coming back to me talking all this nonsense about how much she loves me, needs me, can't live without me etc. etc. etc. Giovanni Casanova also makes some good points. I just wanted to let you know how fvcked up the situation is from my expirience

She told me that she doesn't want me out of her life and still wants to "date". Meaning we both date each other and other people. I told her yes because I love her too much and don't want to lose her for good.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! .......Oh my God. That was so funny. It nearly made me cry. Thanks for the good laugh I needed that!!! Maybe if Puertorican_lover reads this he can give you better advice than I. Sorry for being a d1ck though. But before you get pissed at me ask yourself this question.... "If this girl had any consideration for my feelings (even if it's a little) would she do this to me?" Now after you ask yourself that question and already came up with a conclusion answer my question.... Are you going to believe everything she fvcking tells you? If your answer is "Yes, Because I love her" or anything other than "Hell No!" then you are a hopeless case man. I really feel sorry for you. Feelings are a ***** but thats life man. You have to drop this one. She isn't for you.

She also said that we never know what the future holds and when she's ready to be serious again maybe we'll give it another try.

Buddy I have some good news for you...... and some bad news. She's very likely to come back to you in the future. Since you love her so much just "date" her for now until she's ready to become serious again. In other words :Cough Cough: "Yours" again. But..... She'll be ready to become serious after she's fvcked at least 2 guys from names begining from the letters "A" - "Z". X= number of letters in the alphabet and multiply that by 2. You do the math. Thats the bad news. If you're willing to take her back after she's done (they never get done) with her wh0rish behavior than thats your problem.

I wish you the best of luck buddy.

 

[MindOverMatter]

your girl wants to go around f*cking other guys, while giving you a pitty f*ck every once in a while, and not only are you not disgusted, but are still in love? where is your dignity man. right now you are her f*cking puppet, if she gets tired of being f*cked by every guy in that city, she knows she has her little lapdog who will give her a loving relationship.

You're nothing but a Plan B to her in case she doesnt meet someone better, a small measure of security. This girl DOES NOT LOVE YOU, if she loved you, she wouldn't even consider being with another guy, she'd see you as her perfect match. You are just her backup guy, she wants to keep you around just in case she gets used up and can't find a decent guy anymore.

You've been here since 2002 and you still can't see through this bullsh!t? What's the matter with you man, be a man, kick this b!tch out of your life, and find yourself a girl worth keeping.

my 2c.

p.s. your girl is a wh0re.

 

[belividere]

alright if you have been on here for two f'ing years just give it up. It will be hard but seriously the girl is just fvcking with your head. hate fvck her. Be warned when you do this type of girl will love you back and want more of it. And wear a rubber she is a wh0re. Either do that or block her out of your life. You do not need this. Keep telling yourself that it is the truth and the sooner you realize the better.

 

[CLOONEY]

Walk away from this one. Thats all that needs to be said, the other guys have pointed out why in th earlier posts. If you choose to stay with her, dont come back here winging about what to do because your answer will be the same, time after time after time. Walk.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Guys, listen to what you're saying. Don't any of you have any imagination?

Viper, you are in a bad situation and normally a guy shouldn't be in the position you are in now. But since you're there why not make it worth your while?

If she wants to date you, fine; let her. However, she takes you out. Let her make the date, pick you up and pay for dinner, movies or whatever.

She probably won't go for it so she'll break it off cleanly, which would be good. BUT if she goes for it, WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF GIGOLOS! Nobody said that guys couldn't be professional daters. If she wants your company, let her pay for it!

Exactly! This mans knows what he's talking about. Make her earn her time with you, it will cost her. Don't do things for her (AFC trying to buy her time) without her earning it first.

Tell her you dont' want to date, but you can "see eachother" (womanesse for bangin'). If she insists on dating, then do what Francisco D. said, let her do the "courting."

She wants to scope out the men that are up for grabs, but still keep you under her thumb. She wants to keep you in the bullpen, while she finds herself a starting rotation of guys she can get attention/sex/etc. from. She will drop you and the whole idea of "we can still date" as soon as she finds somebody who she's interested in more than you, and that won't take long.

So not only should you have her take you out and pay, only give her sex when she earns it. You don't date her. Dating a broad who you have one-itis for is AFC. You only date women you are already sleeping with, and in this case, she needs to pay for it.

 

[dereklearnslow]

Why couldn't this thread be up around feb 2004 when I broke up with my ex. This is almost like looking into a mirror.

And if you guy's advice is correct, I've been doing the right thing by ignoring her as much as possible (she still likes to peek in on me from time to time).

Go me.

 

[J.C.]

So chick says bla, bla bla.
What should a DJ do?
He should say: Yeah, sure, whatever, let's fvck.

WTF is this talk of LOVE in here?! Like "she does not LOVE you man, drop her" Bah. Like her tits taste different if she does not love you anymore.
Is she hot? Yes
Is she available for a fvck?Yes
And your problem is...?


WHO CARES if she fvcks 100 other guys? As long as she treats him right and is there when he wants to bang her, what is the problem?
Shouldn't he have 2-3 girls waiting in line for (another) opportunity to get in bed with him?

 

[Phoenix_of_the_ashes]

Originally posted by Viper423
Ok, so my girlfriend broke up with me a few days ago because she told me that she needed her space and felt smothered and doesn't want to be serious with anyone for a long time, she doesn't want to be tied down. She told me that she doesn't want me out of her life and still wants to "date". Meaning we both date each other and other people. I told her yes because I love her too much and don't want to lose her for good. She also said that we never know what the future holds and when she's ready to be serious again maybe we'll give it another try. What should I do, i already told her yes?

This girl should have the **** beaten out of her.

 

[Sugarfoot]

Did you even bother to read the other thread you started? Several people gave you sound advice on getting over her, yet you've started a thread on whether you should get back together with this wh0re in an "open relationship" (that is, giving her the green light to f*ck as many guys as she wants, while you stay home jerking off). This one, my friend, is pathetic!

You don't want advise. You want people to encourage your weak and codependent @ss to go back for more abuse. Are you sure you have a penis? Go ahead, get back together with her. That way, if you're ever fed up with her torturing you psychologically, you can come back here and post another thread saying how she dumped your effeminite @ss again. I'll be the first to write "Good. You deserved it you little b!tch!".


No TOOTLES™ for you.

 

[Don Juanabbe]

Originally posted by Viper423
Ok, so my girlfriend broke up with me a few days ago because she told me that she needed her space and felt smothered and doesn't want to be serious with anyone for a long time, she doesn't want to be tied down. She told me that she doesn't want me out of her life and still wants to "date". Meaning we both date each other and other people. I told her yes because I love her too much and don't want to lose her for good. She also said that we never know what the future holds and when she's ready to be serious again maybe we'll give it another try. What should I do, i already told her yes?

Seriously man, this is f*cked. Completely f*cked.

You know what? F*CK HER.

Are you a sado masochist?

 

[Panda 2000]

I'd try and go for fvckbuddy status.

 

[Don Juanabbe]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Guys, listen to what you're saying. Don't any of you have any imagination?

Viper, you are in a bad situation and normally a guy shouldn't be in the position you are in now. But since you're there why not make it worth your while?

If she wants to date you, fine; let her. However, she takes you out. Let her make the date, pick you up and pay for dinner, movies or whatever.

She probably won't go for it so she'll break it off cleanly, which would be good. BUT if she goes for it, WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF GIGOLOS! Nobody said that guys couldn't be professional daters. If she wants your company, let her pay for it!

This is a good idea......BUT

Judging on the nature of his post, I don't think Viper has it in him to pull this off and remain detached.

No offense to Viper, but he's way too AFC at this juncture.