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Get Offended Less!

LiveFreeX

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Heres a quick rant:

If you are a person who is easily offended, you are not fun to be around. I don't know about you guys but when I'm with friends, we always insult and tease each other.

Me: Hey man wassup?
Friendl: "Sup FAG, beat your ass in CS the other day, are all canadians as bad as you?!"
Me: "You suck dude, noone beats me 33 to 2, re-match time... you're gonna get raped this time"
Friend: "Bring your friends, you'll need them, loser"

Guys generally don't get offended... and nothing said here should cause offense. Then you have the typical office broads who if you try and tease or have fun with, they are taking it literally and running to the manager to complain.. Then later, they wonder why no one wants to talk to them and they don't have a boyfriend? (which is also your fault)

I have these girls and guys in my office (from the west) and everything I say or do seems to be taken in offense. Fortunately, MOST of the Chinese don't really care and are quite cool about banter and having fun but then you have the westernized Chinese (Women) and PC Laowais(Western People) who take everything said in the office out of context and find a reason to be offended by it. These are also people who have no girlfriend/boyfriend and very few real friends (who don't bitterly complain about everything).

Are people's lives so meaningless that they need to feel offended by teasing, jokes or words... especially if the person saying it meant NO offense of any kind and is doing it with a smile and a laugh. If I let everything Chinese people say and do to me in the street, get to me then I would be a useless heap crying in a corner..

Part of the reason why I get hired is because adults generally enjoy my personality (and my classes) because I don't take anything seriously and I'm the type of person you can relax with and let your hair down. It's extremely important when creating a good learning atmosphere. If people would relax and not be so seriously serious all the time, I think there would be alot less stress in life. Why people actively CHOOSE to get offended and feel bad is beyond me. Why not CHOOSE to play along and fun instead?

There are a few guys in the office who I really get along and they subscribe to the same theory... we all sit in one corner. Then there are about 5 or 6 guys who are new univ grads (young people) and are extremely political and in agreement with everything that comes out of the women's mouthes. This is usually the point when the talk of 'sensitivity classes' comes into effect.

I'm offended by people getting offended! Why do people have to get offended? Is it an attention grab?

Anyway if you get offended by meaningless things, then I guarntee that people will simply not want to talk to or be around you. Something to think about for those PC guys and girls out there.
 

3countriesPlan

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Well, if its a professional environment they aren't gonna like you talking like that to them. You gotta be professional in the workplace as they are your coworkers not friends.
 

LiveFreeX

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Really? I don't like work places where people treat me like a tool as opposed to a person... especially when they are selling my personality as the product.
 
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LiveFreeX said:
I'm offended by people getting offended! Why do people have to get offended? Is it an attention grab?
I can think of a few reasons. I don't think people CHOOSE to be offended.

1. Low self esteem. This can cause them to be really thin skinned.

2. They don't realize you're joking. They could be a bit air headed and take that seriously. Or have shabby social skills that need work.

3. Maybe the environment you're in just doesn't call for that.

4. Finally it may be you. If this is happening frequently, you make think that you're coming across in a certain way but everyone else sees you in an entirely different light.

I admit that I get offended a bit, even when I intellectually know they probably just joking. But I try not to let it get to me though.
 

Mike32ct

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In a perfect world, everybody would be "just joking." But that's not reality. Everybody is NOT joking. Some people really are mean, malicious, bullying, and/or condescending, but act like they are joking. Or they lie and say they were just joking when you call them out on it. Is someone actually going to admit, "Yes, you're right. I wasn't joking. I just get sick pleasure from making you feel badly."? Of course not.

While at times I can be overly sensitive, for the most part, I know who is being playful and who is being mean.

I'm far from Mr. PC, but I do think it's best to save b@llbusting for people you know well. A person you don't know well might misinterpret it and think you are being mean.

But if the OP is recommending having a thick skin with everyone, whether they are mean or joking, I agree. It's just not easy when you sense someone is being mean or condenscending to you.
 

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