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General tip: Getting What You Want in Life


New Member
Jan 25, 2004
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Hi, I'm WinterFruit.

Over my teenage years i have been pursuing excellence in life.
I have always looked for patterns of success in successful people and i have asked myself what makes them different from me?
How can they achieve so much and get what they want and i can't? Basically my question to myself was, "How can I live a successful life?" financially, emotioanlly, physically, and with my relationships and etc...
"How can i live a successful life?" is the question i have been trying to answer for almost 6 years.

Many people try goign to self-improvement sites, read SI books, and listen to SI audio tapes but after reading it they never really change and they never develop themselves. They might gain a sense of knowledge in SI but they never really make their transformation. To make the transformation you have to DO.
Theres a big difference in understanding and doing and if you dont DO it then you really dont know it.

Some people who purchase these SI books and tapes never really even finish reading or listening to them. They either have it sitting in their book shelf, on their computer, in their stereo collecting dust or have touched it a few times but havent really finished it. Just having these SI books and tapes makes them feel more comfortable and secure so when they feel this way they just put it on the shelf and never touch it. This attitude reflects the attitude of lots and lots of people with their lives.

They are feeling good or relaxed at the moment and they tell themselves its okay not to do something they really must do. THey really dont follow through with things they ought to do and they make excuses. The stories you make up saying that you will do things later or you dont have time are the stories that are preventing you from getting what you want. The reason people dont start things is because they think it's too hard or they think they will do it later. They want immediate comfort and they tell themselves these things.

Stop lying to yourself. Stop saying that you will do it later because you won't. Stop making yourself feel good by accepting mediocrity. If your not giving your best effort in the things you do then you are not living a successful life. There should be no reason that you can't get what you want in your life. If you want to get a better body then go do it. Follow through on your desires and exercise. If you want to have better social life then go get it. Ask that cute girl in your English class out for some fun.

Stop lying to yourself saying that you will wait another year before you take action. You won't you won't you won't. I can promise you that. You will think that you will but you won't. The more time you wait the worse you will get. Change your life today. Change your life now.

What is it in your life that is not good enough? What is it?
Where do you want it to be? Ask yourself this and ask yourself why you MUST and HAVE TO change. Tell yourself the truth.
And then do it. Just do it. Don't think about it and then do it. Just do it. If you think about it the chances are you won't so tell your rational mind to shut up. You need to make these demands for yourself and you have to strive for YOUR best. Shut your rational mind up and give it your all.

Do things that really matter to you. Stop going out and drinking and partying with your friends when what matters to you is to finally graduate and get out of college. Stop using pleasure to avoid pain. Instead of making reasons that you shoudn't do something give reasons why you should. Put pain over pleasure. Do something to achieve what you want. Stop wanting and wanting and wanting and not doing ANYTHING to get you what you want.

Make a plan to make your desires a reality. The time you spend towards your goals is inversely proportional to the time you spend on things that don't really matter. What should matter is yourself. Stop doign things for others. Stop doing things that are immediate. Getting what you truly want may not be immediate but the sensation of the result will be 20 times more pleasurable. 20 times more exciting. You will reflect back on the day you achieved what you wanted and you will remember it for the rest of your life and everytime you recall that memory you will feel greater than great. You will feel success.


Master Don Juan
Jul 20, 2003
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Great post. There is something seriously wrong with either our society or humanity as a whole if people need to be told this. But unfortunately this is the case, as 95% of the people i know would forget your advice minutes after reading it. Personally, i make it a point to do something to get closer to attaining each of my goals every single day. I have quite a few goals in mind, some will take months to accomplish and others decades. But i've got all of them broken down to shorter-term milestones and that really puts things into perspective and tells me what needs to be done next.

Dj Tiesto

Don Juan
Oct 26, 2003
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I posted that this tip was great.

But now that I think about it, this post is just a short and well written summary of the basic ideas of SI material.
But this post goes beyond cuz in a way, it contradicts SI material and tells us that most people are not changed by SI books. While this same post is SI.

Hope u know what I mean.

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Don Juan
Mar 15, 2003
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Rational? You mean irrational right? Your mind does not, in any way, rationalize in situations like this. It irrationalizes, think about it. Rabbit has prepared a situation for you...But now, think logically..'rational' if you will about this situation. What's the worst that can happen? Oh no you get rejected and so who cares, you save yourself from a potential disfunctional relationship. You proceed to the next girl, process of elimination! Meanwhile you gain confidence, and seriously rejection sucks... but it's not the end of anything! It's a brief moment that soon passes as the wind, and you.. on the rebound.. find another girl! So does your mind rationalize? Hell no, your mind irrationalizes to great depths! If your mind rationalized you wouldn't have a problem with 'getting what you want'!
I have to disagree although I know what you are saying. I used to think this way. I have tried it. I have been in my mind going over something as stupid and useless as just talking to a good looking girl and my mind says "RUN, or punch her!" (fight or flight) and I have tried to logically tell myself that she is just some little girl that I am smarter stronger and funnier than. BUT, logic dies in the face of fear. I have realized that logic does not really comfort the mind. The mind does not care. Some peoples, read that as less confident people, minds are hard to shut up. I hate to say it but as long as the mind is there talking, that fear will always be there. It is like there are two levels of consciousness, the "logical" one and the "mind." The "mind" is the one concerned with the past and the future, the logical mind knows that nothing really can go wrong, I mean your pick up lines really have to suck for her to pull out a gun. Confidence is the ablity to SHUT DOWN that little mind, and let the true BEING come forth. READ Mr Fingers Authenic Confidence for the references to the awesome book "The Power of Now" to see what I am talking about.


Senior Don Juan
May 11, 2003
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The mass majority of people will never come to grips with the key to success. A lot of them think that you have to be rich in order to be powerful...not true. A lot of the richest people today started off with barely a penny to their names and over time, constructed multi-billion dollar empires.

Lets back up to two words that is important: over time.

This is where a lot of people fail at. Most people would rather just act like a worthless slug and drag through their jobs and rush to the couch in their house afterwards. Why are "Get Rich Quick!!!" schemes so popular? People deep down want to do the most possible with the least possible amount of effort. When the truth is, this cannot be done. You don't just *snap* become a millionaire overnight. Barring the lottery, most people who want millions will have to earn it the hard way.

The problem with this idea is dedication. If something doesn't yield amazing results in a short amount of time, then its not worth doing. Thats why you always see a huge increase in people at the gyms at the beginning of the year but at the end of the month, its back to the usual crowd that stuck with it all along. Another reason why Atkins diet is popular because people think you will lose 50 lbs in a month.

Another thing to become successful in life is passion. You have to like what you do. With my math skills, I could be a doctor. Instead I chose Graphic Design which is less glorious, pays a lot less, and isn't as interesting of a conversation piece. Why did I choose it? Because I didn't want to force myself to go through 8+ years of schooling, pay 5-6 figures a year in malpractice insurance (despite me not doing anything wrong), and get pressured by pharmaceutical corporations so I can get paid to ***** out their latest worthless placebo-drug. I'd rather take Graphic Design. Now that starts off at just $30k where a doctor is something like $80k. However for those that stick it out (it is estimated that as much as 40% leave the occupation after the first year), five years later you make $55k. If you get big enough to be recognized, start your own firm and make hundreds of thousands yearly.

I want to change the world with my style of imagery (black background with bright colors) but this isn't going to happen overnight. I need to prove myself and that is to be dedicated and stay passionate about the topic.


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