Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Do you like to "sleep around" with lots of Slvts, and expect to marry a virgin Trad woman?

Pick the dating habit which best describes yours in the poll options below:

  • I have/had Sex and relationships with Slvts, I want to marry a Trad Woman

    Votes: 5 19.2%
  • I had casual sex and don't want to settle down

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • I am in a LTR with a good woman

    Votes: 9 34.6%
  • I have a few plates that I am casually dating now

    Votes: 2 7.7%
  • I want to sleep around before settling down with a good trad con woman

    Votes: 7 26.9%
  • I am a virgin until marriage

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • No hymen no diamond

    Votes: 3 11.5%

  • Total voters
    26

Gamisch

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This thread is a classic. Its amazing to see that ( assuming most posters are from the usa) the way men think about partner count is still extremely conservative.

I mean, 5 cacks? That's easily reached by age 18 and imo that's not even that crazy( 15 ,1 bf, 16 ,2 bfs , 17 ,2 bf's) . And I am being generous here. Now, we get the party fase , alcohol and drugs, the discovery of old ,college and hook ups among women. C'mon fellows let's keep it real ...unless you live in a religiously driving environment 20 + count is nothing out of the ordinary. Do you even know how women function nowadays?

What I kinda missed though was the timeline what happens once you actually manage to get a LTR with a "virgin", or a low count notched girl. Ime most guys who managed to get this ran into the following problem;

" I wanna experience more, I missed out on dating, its unfair bc you got to play the field and i didn't "

I am not saying there is a good or bad but how do you guys wanna manage that drive? Seen it happen countless times, dude was all alpha bout his woman being this good girl but in this day and age there will always be some one in her circle encouraging her to play the field and " just date around". Hell , even religious women have a 5 + count.

And about having sex on the first date; I guess I am so arrogant I expect a woman to give it up fast bc of the chemistry I create. Maybe that's why most of my LTR's eventually failed lol.
 

Gamisch

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Settling for slvts because “virgins are unrealistic” and “virgins suffer from fomo” reads like a cope to me. You want a virgin, but it’s unrealistic to you.

I can tell you right now. Expecting a woman to be a virgin in exchange for marriage is Standard Self Respect in many cultures, even today. It used to be a standard in the West too.

In 2022, any LTR is going to be difficult to maintain regardless of virgin or not. The real issue here is the Laws governing relations between men and women. The Laws are whack. Change the Laws, and restore something resembling what we used to have and most of the issues around lack-of-virgins etc will resolve themselves.
Settling for slvts because “virgins are unrealistic” and “virgins suffer from fomo” reads like a cope to me. You want a virgin, but it’s unrealistic to you.

I can tell you right now. Expecting a woman to be a virgin in exchange for marriage is Standard Self Respect in many cultures, even today. It used to be a standard in the West too.

In 2022, any LTR is going to be difficult to maintain regardless of virgin or not. The real issue here is the Laws governing relations between men and women. The Laws are whack. Change the Laws, and restore something resembling what we used to have and most of the issues around lack-of-virgins etc will resolve themselves.
Yes you do have a point there. Its is a cope, and I think at this point I dont even call a woman a slvt if she has x amount of d!ck on her resume. It's a another " dont ask a woman " thing , like asking for age or weight lol.

I have a lot of Muslim friends , and for them it's a even more important theme then for "pure westernized " men like me. And even they give up once they reach 30+. Good luck finding any woman around that age with a low cack count. Personally I dont care right now , bc it would severely limit my pool of women, and I dont neccesarily look for marriage. I also believe you need societal structures to contain the dark sides of female nature, but realistically there's no going back at this point ( anytime soon at least)

But still I am curious how would you deal with the "virgin fomo"? I've seen it happen way too often to just neglect this aspect.
 

Zimbabwe

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I also believe you need societal structures to contain the dark sides of female nature, but realistically there's no
Why do so many men on here have this weird fantasy that all women are secretly Slvtty? You do realise the only reason women act so degenerate is because of rhe media and culture? Every channel has women naked and dancing for the pleasure of others.

The sex and city lifestyle is glorified on the media and families are shamed.
 

DonJuanjr

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Why do so many men on here have this weird fantasy that all women are secretly Slvtty? You do realise the only reason women act so degenerate is because of rhe media and culture? Every channel has women naked and dancing for the pleasure of others.

The sex and city lifestyle is glorified on the media and families are shamed.
Do you honestly think you're going to see change in your lifetime? Unless there is societal collapse, there is no going back to how women behavior was tamed. You can be a pointless sexual martyr, and be the sole guy treating them the way they need to be treated. It doesn't matter, because they'll just ignore you and go to the next guy. Have fun becoming incel for nothing...

It's ridiculous to even think for a second that there will be some unified mass worldwide public shaming of female behavior. The cat is out of the bag forever. Don't respond with complaining about simps, because you know what, they are humans with needs too. They can't be blamed that they're thirsty due to not having success, and fall to that behavior.

Just like people can't be unified against the powers that be, men can't be unified to hold women's actions accountable on a mass societal scale.
 

Gamisch

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So the choice is Slvts or Muslims? Is that what you’re saying?

Because you appear to be coping again. “My Muslim friends all gave up on finding a virgin too.”

No.



You suddenly know lots of virgins? And they are telling you they are all suffering from fomo?
You don't answer the question .

Let's first off say I count a woman with a low cack count as a virgin in this case( category Virgin - low count) .What I am saying on both posts is as far as I've seen dudes being in LTR's with these type of women, the woman sooner or later tends to show signs of fomo. In all my years I indeed seen a handful of these cases. Let's say around 10.

I said I personally dont care too much for the count, but my close Muslim friends do. Maybe a cope, but I am just curious how YOU say a man deals with that. So that's beyond the cope imo.

And to answer your first sentence; I do feel like in my country your biggest chance of finding a virgin is indeed a muslim woman. You'll be hard pressed to find a westernized woman ,age 25-30 with a count under 5(bc like I said over here sexual femalefreedom is stimulated) . If they exist maybe you can tell the forum how that works?

Btw I like your cut throat approach, but you gotta elaborate and answer.
 
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Gamisch

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You don't have to deal with anything. Men have it in their minds that they "have to" commit to a woman and settle down.

So, you cope and accept any sh1t sandwich you're served, while moaning "but my muslims friends accept slvts too. And all my friends say their virgin wives aren't happy.'

Dude. You absolutely suck. You're the slvt enabler-type. These types of men (men like you) have failed women collectively because you are so horny you'd fvck and beg for women your grandfather wouldn't have looked twice at.
If I read between the lines you trying to say " up your standards " , to men. You do have a point there I gotta admit that one. At the same time you blame it all on men(like me) , and say women are free of guilt. Doesnt work that way imo.

You cannot close your eyes for reality. Dont hate the player if you hate the game. Do you live in Iran or some country like that? Foth, like I am behind the sexual revolution and told women back whenever in the 70's 60's there should be sexual freedom and women should be free to play the field. Did you even read what i wrote? Over here women are STIMULATED to date , explore ,experiment ect = higher count. That means most men at some point might meet a girl they actually like ,but now she has a past.

I am a open minded type of dude so I try to listen to whatever point you try to make, maybe you can do the same. No need for insults my brother. I think you are a respected poster and I was just asking you something. Let's just have a conversation and if there's something to teach, then teach so all men(assuming there are more men like me) can actually learn something and improve.

I am saying third time now that even my Muslim friends feel like if they wanna be with a woman at some point they might have to lower their standard bc finding a woman with a low cack count is like finding a needle in the haystack. How is that my cope? I am not a muslim , I am not trying to marry a virgin .Maybe their cope ,not mine.

And regarding the sandwich , I'll repeat : I don't care if a woman wants to be a slvt . I can go on OLD and meet a slvt who pretends to me she is a good girl, who knows? I can't control all women on this planet bro. There's something called individual freedom .

Would be more constructive if you would actually answer the question, and that was just a question out of interest on how a man deals with fomo from women, bc that is a thing you know. Looking forward to your answer.
 

Gamisch

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Asking women to be accountable is like asking a monkey to be accountable.

That’s why, in history, society and laws have been managed by men. If you give a typewriter to a monkey and complain that it can’t type as well as you..that’s similar to you trying to blame women for the market and society. Women follow men. You appear to be following women and saying she’s accountable for the world that men have created for her. That’s whack. Men created this world and they wrote all the laws that enable consequence-free promiscuity for women and Alphas.
With all due respect , but you're all up in your feeling about this subject and I wonder why. I don't follow anybody but myself first and foremost.

If women would indeed followed men this whole board wouldn't exist, c'mon now. Most men end up here bc their rose tinted glasses were taking off with brute force. And check your history books, it filled with women who fought for sexual freedom ,equality ect. And yes perhaps when that happened things went to shyt. But its too easy to just ignore those facts my brother. Otherwise(bc my guess is you'll say these women were lead by men also) throw facts, sources and links, not just personal conspiracy theories.

The bolded sentences kinda contradict each other dont you think? First you say in history men made the rules and things were good, and then you say the same men made the current rules which f ed things up?? Make a decision bro.

I read your post before so I kinda know here you coming from from a political pov. But reading between the lines you are actually the one white knighting women by taking all blame away from them, while most men here learn to see things for what they really are. Imo that's whack and unrealistic and even part of the problem. That's why I bolded those sentences. Bc that's how we got here to this point in history. Men like you despise women and at the same time pedalstalizing women. At least I am realistic enough to accept something as a past or a count over 5.

You sound like that older brother who always fight when his little brother (women) gets in trouble without checking context, while the kid silently laughs, turns around and does it all over again knowing it wont be held accountable their actions and is always protected. Insane.

So on this topic I respectfully disagree with you. Any human being is accountable for their own actions, that how the (westernized) world works.women are not monkeys, their human beings. You need Shari'a kinda laws to prevent women from notching up their count, and that will never happen. And I am happy with that tbh.
 

Gamisch

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Asking women to be accountable is like asking a monkey to be accountable.

That’s why, in history, society and laws have been managed by men. If you give a typewriter to a monkey and complain that it can’t type as well as you..that’s similar to you trying to blame women for the market and society. Women follow men. You appear to be following women and saying she’s accountable for the world that men have created for her. That’s whack. Men created this world and they wrote all the laws that enable consequence-free promiscuity for women and Alphas.
And let me make one thing clear. I highly respect you as a poster, not ashamed to say that ,even when I was still lurking. Sometimes I think your vision is too black and white, but other times I see you really nail a topic. So I will definitely re read this and give it all some deep thought. Let's just refrain from personal insults.

We all here bc we both despise and admire women right? ( why are they so hard,why are they so easy?) This is a endless infinite topic, I have a thousand more opinions on this. If I made the rules every man was still together with his first love and we were all in 60 year plus marriages. But that's not reality.

Looking forward to your answer.
 

HaleyBaron

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And let me make one thing clear. I highly respect you as a poster, not ashamed to say that ,even when I was still lurking. Sometimes I think your vision is too black and white, but other times I see you really nail a topic. So I will definitely re read this and give it all some deep thought. Let's just refrain from personal insults.

We all here bc we both despise and admire women right? ( why are they so hard,why are they so easy?) This is a endless infinite topic, I have a thousand more opinions on this. If I made the rules every man was still together with his first love and we were all in 60 year plus marriages. But that's not reality.

Looking forward to your answer.
I told Pan before, that insult energy he gives off pissed me off. Cause he easily gets angry at you without anyone trying to instigate. That's female energy right there, and it makes the credibility of his posts get harmed. We're here to get away from the emotional spiel of beta men and women on other forums. Whenever I see a guy do the same here, I instantly assume they still have a lot of feminine nature to get rid of. Ain't their fault. Just gotta make them aware of it.
 

Murk

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Whenever I see a guy do the same here, I instantly assume they still have a lot of feminine nature to get rid of. Ain't their fault. Just gotta make them aware of it.
I never argue with anyone on here despite lots of negativity thrown at me, it's a waste of time and I have nothing to prove. Take advice, give advice, successful happy people are not trying to win points on a forum.
 

HaleyBaron

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I never argue with anyone on here despite lots of negativity thrown at me, it's a waste of time and I have nothing to prove. Take advice, give advice, successful happy people are not trying to win points on a forum.
I have argued before, but it was more of out of someone throwing the insult at or making a huge assumption of where I'm coming from "only an idiot would think that" or something like "childish view of the world." That kind of stuff. It's worse since this is all text so it lacks a lot of nuance of physical body so you also cannot tell if someone is joking or being soft boiled. I try to give the benefit of the doubt but then the following posts keep that same energy and then I conclude that they are genuinely acting that way. It also makes sense cause of these guys come from other parts of the internet where they can act like children.
 

BeExcellent

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Advice from the old lady:

Promiscuity hurts both men and women. There is a body of research to support this that is readily available. We can debate which gender it affects more adversely but it creates issues rooted in lack of trust & fear of vulnerability which you need for a deeply meaningful relationship. Those issues manifest in many insidious ways. But to the question at hand here are problems the man hore inadvertently creates by his slaying ways.

1. Difficulty bonding to a partner
2. Grass is greener thinking
3. Sexual impatience with inexperienced woman
4. Lack of openness
5. Jadedness
6. Lack of relationship skills (which are different than seduction skills.
 

s74rk

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Interesting thread, my perspective is that the obvious answer is "yes" as a way to maximize one's reproductive success, while still experiencing a stable family life later on. It's the best of both worlds in a sense, as you would achieve quantity and then quality.

This is just ideal maximization of male mating preferences. The female version might be something similar, like 'party around with hot guys' in their 20s, then get wifed up by the millionaire in her 30s, just in time for a kid or two. Alpha fvcks, beta bucks.

It's the interplay of these opposing dynamics which creates competition between humans and allows the 'better' (more attractive, stronger, smarter, more resourceful, etc) genes to eventually propagate. Our evolutionary strategies have evolved as such, and men and women's interests are often in opposition to each other (hence "the game"). Most women aren't pure party sloots because that strategy would not lead to keeping around a male partner (who needs to have a good idea of his paternity) to help support and raise the child. Humans are still the most complex species, and are mainly K-selected, i.e. the offpsring are weak, mature slowly, and need lots of investment.

But if you take away consequence and accountability from women, i.e. remove the risk of having kids due to easily accessed birth control, watch how their behavior and preferences change.

@BeExcellent I'd love to get a picture of how said old lady was acting in her 20s. In my experience with women, they rationalize their emotions relative to their current hormonal state and social value. It's so easy for a 30+, 40+, 50+, etc woman to espouse the value of not being promiscuous, settling down, etc. It's another thing whether they actually acted on those values *when it mattered* - when they were young and attractive with the most mating and reproductive potential.

There's exceptions, but most older women I've known and dealt with, hell even my own mother and aunt, who follow exactly this hypocrisy I described.
 

BeExcellent

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Interesting thread, my perspective is that the obvious answer is "yes" as a way to maximize one's reproductive success, while still experiencing a stable family life later on. It's the best of both worlds in a sense, as you would achieve quantity and then quality.

This is just ideal maximization of male mating preferences. The female version might be something similar, like 'party around with hot guys' in their 20s, then get wifed up by the millionaire in her 30s, just in time for a kid or two. Alpha fvcks, beta bucks.

It's the interplay of these opposing dynamics which creates competition between humans and allows the 'better' (more attractive, stronger, smarter, more resourceful, etc) genes to eventually propagate. Our evolutionary strategies have evolved as such, and men and women's interests are often in opposition to each other (hence "the game"). Most women aren't pure party sloots because that strategy would not lead to keeping around a male partner (who needs to have a good idea of his paternity) to help support and raise the child. Humans are still the most complex species, and are mainly K-selected, i.e. the offpsring are weak, mature slowly, and need lots of investment.

But if you take away consequence and accountability from women, i.e. remove the risk of having kids due to easily accessed birth control, watch how their behavior and preferences change.

@BeExcellent I'd love to get a picture of how said old lady was acting in her 20s. In my experience with women, they rationalize their emotions relative to their current hormonal state and social value. It's so easy for a 30+, 40+, 50+, etc woman to espouse the value of not being promiscuous, settling down, etc. It's another thing whether they actually acted on those values *when it mattered* - when they were young and attractive with the most mating and reproductive potential.

There's exceptions, but most older women I've known and dealt with, hell even my own mother and aunt, who follow exactly this hypocrisy I described.
Fair question. I was a socially awkward teen and although pretty I was extremely naïve and inexperienced. In high school I dated a boyfriend but I never saw him in any state of undress and we never had sex. He was a year older than me and went to the military. I was a varsity athlete and had a heavy academic load and very strict parents.

When I went to university I joined a sorority, was elected to student government and played soccer. I obtained both a BS degree in Biology and a BA degree in English simultaneously within 4 years. I was premed and academics took a lot of time. I did make many friends, many of whom I still am close to. I dated some but didn’t understand how to be girly, having been a tomboy as a teen, so I would have crushes on guys but typically they would find me socially uncalibrated, shy and inexperienced. I was great at being a buddy or friend but I had no idea how to be girly. I had no idea about sex as I hadn’t had any.

At 20 I met my first real boyfriend. We dated 2 years, yes on sex, he showed me many things but he broke my heart and cheated/left me for a far more experienced woman. Then I was 22. I met my now friend from Vegas, we dated a year. He wasn’t being serious enough about me so I broke things off and walked away. For him I have always been the one who got away. We remain friends and he is an investor in my business endeavors. I trust him with my kids and my money. But we are not going to rekindle things after 35 years, lol.

From age 22 to 27 in a LTR. He was very handsome and proposed 6 months into the relationship. This freaked me out since I didn’t feel we knew each other well enough to marry, so I said “Maybe but not yet”. We dated another 4.5 years until I found he was cheating behind my back being a playboy. I dumped him. Everyone thought we would eventually marry, his family, my family, all our friends…I dumped him, moved away & never looked back. His mother and I were very close. She told me that it shattered him when I left. He loved me but didn’t think twice about sneaking around. For him too I was the one who got away.

I never cheated. Not on anyone.

27-28 I dated a dentist from NYC who I met on the NYC subway. We stopped due to distance & remain friends today.

From 28-30 I dated a guy a bit older (41) and this guy too started talking marriage fairly early on. He had an anger problem however and I distanced myself until he started seeing other women. That way he could be the one who broke up in his mind as he was dangerous.

At 30 I dated the professional model for a few months but he was terribly insecure and a total workaholic, so I let that go. After I married friends told me how he had said what a mistake he had made in letting me leave…

And the next man was the nightclub owner who became my husband who I was with 20 years & three children. He proposed 6 months in. I was 31 when we married.

My fiancé of today proposed about 9 months in. So I’ve always been seen as marriage material.

Between LTRs I get literally bombarded with interest, the majority of which I decline. I date with an eye towards a man’s character because I do not date casually. If I award a man with my time it is because I like him & want to explore getting to know him. I do not sleep together quickly as I am still getting to know someone. And men have told me that they didn’t realize I liked them because I didn’t leap in bed right away. I come off a little aloof and at times a little austere. That isn’t who I am but that is the impression my cautious nature initially can give off. I didn’t do that with my fiancé. I made a conscious effort to show him that I had interest in him and we have both chemistry & connection which I saw early on. So I was less conservative, which was emotionally uncomfortable for me. It worked out well however so it’s all good.

There were a few instances where I lost interest after getting physically involved, and a couple times men picked someone else over me. So I’ve had a few STRs along the way. My pattern after divorce was I didn’t date at all for the first year, then an 18 month distance LTR, then a 3 year LTR that I left, 9 months LTR that ended (and I met my fiancé that same night.). I think I had been single a whole 2 hours.

I’ve always been a relationship gal and men figure out very early on that is who I am and they recognize my value. I’ve never pressed for a relationship. Men have always pursued that with me. Usually I’ve been the one to end things, with the exception of my first real relationship…which made me more cautious not less. That took some working through.

I am generous by nature and patient. But I won’t tolerate BS indefinitely. Men have mistaken my kindness for weakness at times…until they realize it wasn’t weakness at all. But by then it’s too late. My ex husband has never dated or had sex since I left. He has told me candidly that I am not replaceable. Certainly not now in his 50s as he let himself go. I wish he’d date. He just isn’t interested.
 
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Murk

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Agreeableness and getting along with everyone is extremely feminine. That’s what you’re advocating - ball-less masculinity like a true mangina posing as a male.
I agree but a forum like this isnt the time or the place for it. I’ve seen good posters tangle in back and forths and it’s just weak behaviour imo, debate and break down an opinion by all means.
 

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I think every human being has an inner slut instinct, Both females and males. I think it’s very rare for any female to be a good wife until she gets this out of her system. We guys on the other hand are more likely to give this up if we find a decent woman before we do. As for me personally I am married now but have had my share of sexual partners over the years. About the only thing on my sexual bucket list that I didn’t get to do was sleep with an Indian woman. Other than that I am good.
 

HaleyBaron

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Agreeableness and getting along with everyone is extremely feminine. That’s what you’re advocating - ball-less masculinity like a true mangina posing as a male.
Im advocating for logical debates because as I said, you cannot be non agreeable on a text only medium due to no idea of eyes, expressions, tone, etc. That is why I avoid them and rather people stick to topic. This is no different from texting. I kept things to the point. Which is what I advise to people like you. If you disagree with something, state why instead of making emotional appeals.
 

Gamisch

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I never argue with anyone on here despite lots of negativity thrown at me, it's a waste of time and I have nothing to prove. Take advice, give advice, successful happy people are not trying to win points on a forum.
I will definitely take this advice by heart, as tend to get drawn into arguments too easy.
No one is arguing, bro.

What happened is these guys try to draw me into debates like this purely so they can pretend to be offended, and then they say “Pan, please stop being mean to everyone.”

It happens a lot. Their goal is to ban me.
Dont neccesarily think you talk bout me, but let me just say that was absolutely not my goal man.

Was actually kinda disappointed you came at me like that bc I do appreciate and value your insights bro, and was sincerely curious to your opinion regarding the subject. But hey it's still a men space, and men sometimes clash, shake hands and laugh about it later. Let's just leave it like this and continue with this interesting subject. Peace and apology if I did came at you kinda hostile.
 
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