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Dealing a girl who rejected you

BasicInstinct

Senior Don Juan
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I posted about this situation earlier, but I decided to retell it because I think there are important points to be gained from it.

Last week I went out with my roommate and a couple of his classmates. There was a hot girl there who I started talking to. We hit it off and at the end of the night I asked for her number. She basically refused to give it to me. Well, later I found out that she had a bf. So I thought, ok fine, no big deal. Life goes on.

Well, we went out again a few nights later. I asked my roommate if the girl was going to be there. He said she was. Well, I didn't really want to see her again, but I thought oh well, I'll just play it cool and see what happens. So we're all hanging out, and I start talking to the girl again. I made no mention of what happened the other night. Towards the end of the night, we got kinda drunk and she started kissing me. We were making out for a while and I probably could have gotten laid that night if it wasn't for extenuating circumstances beyond my control.

Anyways, I'm sure this has happened to all of us at one point in time: there is a girl at school or work that we're attracted to. One day you get up the nerve to ask her out. She says she's busy that day, or that she's washing her hair, or simply just blows you off. You end up feeling stupid and like a loser. The worst part, though, is that you know that you are going to have to see her again eventually! She is in the same class as you or you work the same shift as her. How are you going to face her again?

When this happens, most of us do the wrong thing. Usually we get self-conscious and either ignore her or worse, we'll APOLOGIZE for hitting on her (yeah, I did this once!) Now ignoring her is probably the safest thing to do, but I don't recommend doing this unless she gives you attitude and flat-out disses you. This is because when you ignore her, you are acknowledging that SHE REJECTED YOU. You're giving up power and saying, "I don't want to talk to you anymore because you hurt my feelings!" The better way to handle this situation is to simply BE COOL with her. Say hi to her if you see her, make chit-chat, but don't mention anything about hitting on her. The reason for this is simple- it shows you're confident and not afraid of her opinion of you. But by ignoring the girl, you are simply cutting off your options. And all of you should know, being a DJ means maximizing your options. So play it cool and don't act like it affected you- because as I learned, if you keep your options open, anything can happen.

Good luck.

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Always outnumbered, never outgunned.

It's not safe to hope for the best, without preparing for the worst.
 

Fool

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Nice tip. Just what I need now.

I was thinking of using 'ignore tactic' as challenge. But you explained pretty well that why we shouldn't ignore her.
 

KCFlyer

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Good Post Basic Instinct. I think I've been using the ignore tactic too much. I'll not be outgoing, but if she talks to me, I'll open up. I also liked the point of how women change their minds and baffle us men in the process. I know it happens more than I like.
I have to agree that acting like something never happened is the bast tactic. Obviously, don't be an AFC and hit on her again, but be cool.
One mark of a Don Juan is how he takes rejection. If you are a sore loser, you look bad.
 

TheG02

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That is a great post and just what I needed cuz I have been ignoring this girl that dissed me for a while.

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This G, I'm out. Holla back!!!
 

Ricky

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Well guys this can give us all hope. Women can reject us one day and ride us the next. It's just the way they are!

Hmm, that reminds me of a girl from my past, maybe I'll give her a call

HAHHA
 

BasicInstinct

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Guys, just remember I'm not saying you should count on something like this happening and start clinging to her like an AFC. All I'm saying is keep your options open and play it cool. If you run into her great, but don't go out of your way to talk to her and don't stop working on other girls.

Good luck.

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"I think there is a rebellatory experience awaiting everyone that has to do with finding out who and what you really are. And when it occurs, if it occurs, you’ve reached nirvana-heaven. And to the degree in which you don’t reach that place of realization- you’re in an eternal hell.” -Don Simpson, late producer
 
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