Dating boring in early 30s, is this normal?

LARaiders85

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I never really enjoyed it to begin with, but at least you had some nerves and adrenaline kicking in. It was sort of sporting.

Now its like a job interview, and I feel like I can't be bothered to raise the energy level on these dates. I don't invest in the outcome and I prioritize family and friends, which is both a cause and effect of mediocre dates(I was hungover as **** for my last date lol).

The pool of women are getting older and more careerist, much less feminine and flirty so that might be part of it too.
 

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stormrider

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The only fun thing about women is their vaginas. That’s why we always preach young and dumb chicks who don’t ask too many questions and nag us to death. When I was on adderall and Temporarily lost my sex drive I literally stopped talking to women altogether. I acted like they were the plague. Strangely I had a sense of complete freedom. Strangely the only things I found interesting were meditation and reading. I think 50 year old non sex drive me is going to end up as a monk in the Himalayas.
 
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sosousage

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I never really enjoyed it to begin with, but at least you had some nerves and adrenaline kicking in. It was sort of sporting.

Now its like a job interview, and I feel like I can't be bothered to raise the energy level on these dates. I don't invest in the outcome and I prioritize family and friends, which is both a cause and effect of mediocre dates(I was hungover as **** for my last date lol).

The pool of women are getting older and more careerist, much less feminine and flirty so that might be part of it too.
true man, dating is like interview. better to get a woman that is into the things you are and wont perceive you just like one of 100 tinder options
 

LARaiders85

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The only fun thing about women is their vaginas. That’s why we always preach young and dumb chicks who don’t ask too many questions and nag us to death. When I was on adderall and Temporarily lost my sex drive I literally stopped talking to women altogether. I acted like they were the plague. Strangely I had a sense of complete freedom. Strangely the only things I found interesting were meditation and reading. I think 50 year old non sex drive me is going to end up as a monk in the Himalayas.
What's crazy is I've had amazing intellectual chemistry/legitimate friendship with women but that's not really that high on their radar in choosing men.
 

stormrider

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What's crazy is I've had amazing intellectual chemistry/legitimate friendship with women but that's not really that high on their radar in choosing men.
That's interesting. Every time I express my philosophical thoughts, women purposely try to misunderstand me, put words into my mouth, try to devalidate my beliefs and even experience, try to make me doubt myself, and generally just play a bunch of frame games until I get pissed off. In my experience, most women have a complete inability to engage in dialogue without some form of hidden agenda to control and manipulate for their own benefit. Even females in my family, lol.
 
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LARaiders85

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That's interesting. Every time I express my philosophical thoughts, women purposely try to misunderstand me, put words into my mouth, try to devalidate my beliefs and even experience, try to make me doubt myself, and generally just play a bunch of frame games until I get pissed off. In my experience, most women have a complete inability to engage in dialogue without some form of hidden agenda to control and manipulate. Even females in my family, lol.
Oh I know. You need to look for Myers-Briggs "Perceiver" types. Regardless, a woman you have perfect compatibility with will still reject you over lms, logistics, high score theory, abandonment, or any other reason. And they say men are superficial...my ass.
 

stormrider

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Oh I know. You need to look for Myers-Briggs "Perceiver" types. Regardless, a woman you have perfect compatibility with will still reject you over lms, logistics, high score theory, abandonment, or any other reason. And they say men are superficial...my ass.
Logistics - I lost so many lays in san francisco over logistics, lol. Like I could have a connection with her all night and in the end, she ends up with a random who happens to live a few blocks down. The guy could be belligerent and barely able to walk. Or let's say her friend likes a guy with perfect logistics. She'll take one for the team and fvck the fat guy over perfect connection.

After 10+ sexual partners, a woman becomes completely ruthless when it comes to sex. She's pretty much a manipulation machine at that point. If it were legal for her to stab you for approaching her, she would do it, lol.

The reasons I've been blown out of guarantee lays have been a variety of things from logistics, horoscope, to I like dogs and she like cats. One time I even said "I like women that have some meat on her bones" and she got upset and thought I called her fat. Another time I got rejected because I was getting amogged and body blocked by a bunch of douchebags but she thought I purposely ignored her. LOL.

Dating in san francisco was a trip. Everything had to be perfect. If the wind blew in the wrong direction, I was getting blown out.
 

LARaiders85

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Logistics - I lost so many lays in san francisco over logistics, lol. Like I could have a connection with her all night and in the end, she ends up with a random who happens to live a few blocks down. The guy could be belligerent and barely able to walk. Or let's say her friend likes a guy with perfect logistics. She'll take one for the team and fvck the fat guy over perfect connection.

After 10+ sexual partners, a woman becomes completely ruthless when it comes to sex. She's pretty much a manipulation machine at that point. If it were legal for her to stab you for approaching her, she would do it, lol.

The reasons I've been blown out of gurantee lays have been a variety of things from logistics to I like dogs and she like cats. One time I even said "I like women that have some meat on her bones" and she got upset and thought I called her fat. Another time I got rejected because I was getting amogged and body blocked by a bunch of douchebags but she thought I purposely ignored her. LOL.

Dating in san francisco was a trip. Everything had to be perfect. If the wind blew in the wrong direction, I was getting blown out.
Yeah I know, the women here resent men more than they like men, hence the sabotage tactics. I've never seen anything like it. They are always thinking about the balance of power, not even in the relationship but in the CONVERSATION on a given day lol.
 

Who Dares Win

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Dating sucks in your 30s? well welcome to the club, you will find the bar on the left and the mgtow lounge on the right.

Feel free to deal with women at your terms and just leave them to join the lounge the same moment you're done or you simply busted your nuts.

ps. dont forget to watch the people in their 20s enjoying each others company, you will be able to see them on the groundfloor from the mgtow balcony.
 

markfromeurope

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I never really enjoyed it to begin with, but at least you had some nerves and adrenaline kicking in. It was sort of sporting.

Now its like a job interview, and I feel like I can't be bothered to raise the energy level on these dates. I don't invest in the outcome and I prioritize family and friends, which is both a cause and effect of mediocre dates(I was hungover as **** for my last date lol).

The pool of women are getting older and more careerist, much less feminine and flirty so that might be part of it too.
I hear you mate, I'm 34, went monk mode month ago and I already feel much better/at peace with myself now.

I plan to date again in 2020 but I feel my interest in women dropped a bit after this year crash&burns - it's like it's much easier to get a date and score with a 25-35y old woman now when I'm 34 myself, but this whole dating dynamics is just tiresome. How many times you can go on the first date, how many times you can actually care about a new person in your life if she doesn't really give a phuck about you and your dreams or purpose?

It's really weird because even if I am not the most attractive guy around, I'm definitely experienced and can pick up really pretty women - yet they all start to sound the same to me after a while. I start to think that there's no female game that I've not seen until now. I feel bored and exhausted by lack of good prospects around me - I feel every time I meet a woman, not only she is beneath me, she also isn't worth LTR really.

I also started to think about going to prostitute - not because I cannot pick up some ASAP a.ss - on the contrary - I just don't want to pretend that I care either, especially if I see ONS or STR prospects around at most and I consider them waste of time. If it's only bargain for them most of the time then why not pay for play here and there and just be done with it?

I think abstaining from sex in our age is not an option as well.
 
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markfromeurope

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Just wait until you hit your 50s and try to muster up the energy to deal with women and date. It's fun for a few months, after that its just a lot of work. Wish I could be 34 again knowing what I know now but wisdom always comes at the price of age I suppose
Considering your age and experience, what is your opinion about that early-to-mid 30's crisis in interest in women? Perhaps it's because we tend too give too much interest to them too early and feel it's premature given what we know about women already?

All IRL alphas (like Dan Bilzerian) tend to say "Never chase"

Perhaps it's the matter of lack of proper hunting ground? What would you do if you were 35 again?
 

Who Dares Win

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I believe that once we reach a age past the "you are supposed to make kids now" phase, men and women drift apart because those natural forces pushing them to each other slowly fade.

At that point you have women that are spoiled physically and mentally but mostly emotionally while men are lacking the primal force attracting them to women, basically you have uninterested buyers and expiring goods combined.

Also at that point men are usually less tolerant in general to nonsense and to unpolite unfair behaviours.

Im in my mid 30s, no idea how it will be at 50 but I often ask myself what is the reason to even interact with women at that age, especially if they are your own age too.
 

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I never had a problem with interest in women in my 30s or 40s, trouble was I was dumb and let myself get locked down by 2 instead of valuing myself more and playing the field til I found the right one. Finding one good enough wasn't anywhere near good enough and to be honest back then I was just happy to find someone who would have sex regularly with me. I was skinny, had stupid looking glasses and didn't know my head from a hole in the ground.
If I could go back to 35 I would NOT have kids, i'd divorce the women I was married to at the time. I'd focus on putting on weight, looking my best and being the best version of myself I could be i.e pursuing more money and assets. I also would have stayed away from porn as that warped my reality. Most of all I'd stay patient playing the field, having fun, living MY life while waiting for the right one to come along all the while knowing id be fine if I never found her.
I just grew up in a female scarcity mindset for most of my life. Porn was playboy or penthouse magazines in my teens and 20s and dating was picking up drunk chicks at bars. Online didn't exist til I got my first computer at 32.
And of course I never had any type game til I hit 45 or so that that affected me
 

KindredSpiritzz

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Im in my mid 30s, no idea how it will be at 50 but I often ask myself what is the reason to even interact with women at that age, especially if they are your own age too.
you still wanna get your d*ck wet, you just don't want to marry or live with them anymore. It's easy to talk about picking up younger chicks but I haven't figured how the magic potion for pulling that off yet. Im paying child support on 3 kids for 2 more yrs so money and life style cant be used as bait.
 
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At this point ive realized all relationships have expirations dates so i dont get too invested or give a fuk really. I already met and lost my dream girl so fuk it
 

LARaiders85

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At this point ive realized all relationships have expirations dates so i dont get too invested or give a fuk really. I already met and lost my dream girl so fuk it
Same, or at least the good side she presented to me. I met some better women after but the idealism is impossible to get back regardless.
 

KindredSpiritzz

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At this point ive realized all relationships have expirations dates so i dont get too invested or give a fuk really. I already met and lost my dream girl so fuk it
ya know, Im in the same boat. That co worker I dated for 3 glorious months was what I thought my ideal women was. Kinda hard to get excited about women in general after being crushed like that. Kind of glad my sex drive is starting to dwindle.
 

Who Dares Win

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you still wanna get your d*ck wet, you just don't want to marry or live with them anymore. It's easy to talk about picking up younger chicks but I haven't figured how the magic potion for pulling that off yet. Im paying child support on 3 kids for 2 more yrs so money and life style cant be used as bait.
Top escorts would solve such need and probably will be less expensive.
 

markfromeurope

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I believe that once we reach a age past the "you are supposed to make kids now" phase, men and women drift apart because those natural forces pushing them to each other slowly fade.

At that point you have women that are spoiled physically and mentally but mostly emotionally while men are lacking the primal force attracting them to women, basically you have uninterested buyers and expiring goods combined.

Also at that point men are usually less tolerant in general to nonsense and to unpolite unfair behaviours.

Im in my mid 30s, no idea how it will be at 50 but I often ask myself what is the reason to even interact with women at that age, especially if they are your own age too.
I think it's the matter of positive and negative experience to a significant degree.

I've noticed that my IL in women took hit after several break ups inititated by them - its like my brain's reward circuit starts to signal me that's not a good idea for me to go after them with the same (high) IL as I did before which is an issue because if you are not highly interested in them, you won't really pick them up or game them properly (because you don't want to wake up with hot iron in your hand again so to speak)

I plan to:
- train a lot in 2020 (to raise my endorphine and testosterone levels)
- pay for play if I will hit really dry phase of dating (hopefully not)

You need to feel that what you are doing (work/self-development) pays in this area as well - you just need to. Sex is what you need to be happy, otherwise you will go monk mode and pray to birds and praise Mother Nature whole weeks when other guys will score and score more women :p

What I mean is you need to keep your happiness level in check - otherwise you will erase yourself from this competition (because that's what life is).
 
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