Daring or desperate? The cold, door-knock approach

[MichaelangelloB]

So there's this cute girl I work with and am quite interested in. She also lives in my apartment building, I found out recently. Having just ended a LTR I've been meaning to ask her out to move things along. I ran into her the other night in front of the building and we chatted for a minute (the first time we've actually talked) and I think it went over pretty well, though it was quite brief.

I intend to ask this chick out. My question is, do I wait and catch her on the job, or do I make a ballsy move and attually go up to her room and knock on the door?

Asking her at work seems the casual thing to do, while knocking on the door may make me seem brave, confident, or desperate.

What do you guys think? Has anyone ever tried the cold, door-knock approach?

And if so, what's the best way to tackle the situation? Opinions?

 

[MrCode]

I would not recommend the door knocking approach. It would probably creep her out and make you look desperate.

One time in my AFC days I was at Macy's and this cute chic rung up my purchases. While I was shopping she was making eye contact and being all nice (more than the usual salesperson bullshyt.)

Of course being the AFC I was, I didn't do shyt until I got into my car and realized I should have gotten her number or asked her out. So I actually went home and called up the store and got in contact with her. Needless to say it didn't go over well.

So while this isn't exactly the same, it is pretty close, so I would say just wait until you "run into" her again before trying to make a move. There is just something about going out of your way to make up for being a puzzy earlier that just says all the wrong things to a girl...

 

[Ricky]

I think the difference is making it look like it casually happened instead of being forced.

 

[Ricky]

This wasn't the most immature question I've heard asked, but the guy is 19 so it is not unheard of.

 

[ER!C L!VE]

Originally posted by MichaelangelloB
Opinions?

Stop posting in The Mature Man forum?

 

[MichaelangelloB]

Anybody ever try this?

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Relax dude, time is on your side - why not go with the SoSuave approach - don't force it - let it come naturally - you'll see her again!! Patience!! Next time you see her make your desires known!!!!!

Do NOT knock on her door!!!

 

[Big Pappy]

The thing that concerns me most is that you are trying to hard.

At this point in time, you've talked with her once. For about a minute. Let's just assume that you saw her right now and asked her out. Think she'll say yes? Unlikely. Why? Because she doesn't know anything about you other than what she picked up during that one minute that happened ... how long ago was that?

Definitely do not knock on her door unless you're delivering pizza.

Stay away from where she works, unless it's a place that you would go to if she were never there.

My recommended approach:
When you see her again, talk to her, make her laugh with some twist or stretch on an abservation. You tell her that you have to go, but you'd like to talk to her again. Don't say "sometime".

Get her number - IF - her nonverbal reaction to that statement doesn't involve a shudder or a chill or a grimace. If she's likes you, no problem. If she doesn't, she'll either flake later, or mention a boyfriend, or some such nonsense.

I guess my whole point is, at this point, she has no reason to meet you anywhere. I'm not saying you couldn't bed the girl the next time you saw her, but, it's unlikely.

Be patient and wait until you run into her again. Make her laugh. Tell her that you two should talk again later and get her number for that purpose.

 

[zentraveller]

My advice: don't overthink this, go for the quick approach next time you see her and be bold.

She's just one girl. Expand your circle of options and you may not even want to ask this girl out anymore.

If you do think she's worth it, I say knock on the door. But only if you can maintain your cool and not sabotage yourself with doubts and "what ifs" beforehand.

IF so, then just forget about her until you run into her again, then strike.

 

[OddTech]

Originally posted by MichaelangelloB
Anybody ever try this?

Knocking on a half-stranger's door in my apartment? Yes, I have. It was recent too and kinda fun. I got nothing to lose. There was a girl that live in my apartment, but recently, she sublet her place to a guy I know. After the guy moved out and she moved back in, I went and knock on her place, pretending that the guy still lives there. Of course, I was setting this up.

I pretended that I was looking for the guy and ask her where he is. Then I just put my best game on. I tried to make it look spontaneous and innocent and the girl was quite cool with me. But she made a BS excuse, so it's no go. Bottom line, it's a high-failure shot. I say meet her another time/place if you want a higher chance of success.