Cola's pic thread got me thinking

[KindredSpiritzz]

I expected more of the guy living in his mom's basement that gets his hair cut every 3 months

ummm are we supposed to get our hair cut more often or less often?? asking for a friend

 

[Glassguy]

ummm are we supposed to get our hair cut more often or less often?? asking for a friend

I get mine cut weekly.

 

[Toddz]

At what part of the attraction/interest process through the first couple of dates with a woman do you think you really need to improve? It can be any intent: Relationship, Plates, FWB, etc.

In short, what is the weak link that you would like to improve on your direct interactions with women to help you eliminate as much turnover as possible?

My weak link has become this sort of laziness/entitlement complex that has developed over the past few years when it comes to dating. I'm fully aware of it and it's not healthy. It most likely surfaced as a result of dating multiple women at once and having great success in seducing women and sleeping with them on the first or second date (sometimes in the first hour or two). My strategy was simple. Meet at a bar less than a mile from my house for a few drinks, then head back to my place where I had a bottle of wine or vodka always on hand. Often I would date and sleep with women for a few months, and move then on to the next ones. Most were relationship material and seeking that before I ended it. All of these women were from OLD.

Now, I've become lazy and the idea of the whole courting process is completely nonexistent. It's all about how fast I can sleep with a prospect and how little effort do I have to put in. Sex first and get to know her later.

I would like to settle down in a relationship, and I realize that's simply not going to happen with this current approach. So I would like to improve on the courting process and chill out on the seduction part. Actually get to know a woman and go on a few dates before even considering sex. To stop thinking with my dik basically. I feel like I need to hit the reset button when it comes to women and dating. But it's difficult when you've come up with a system that produces easy results.

 

[Glassguy]

I normally lose interest when:

1.) I get bored with a chick. Once the shine wears off I normally replace that plate.

2.) I become her source of entertainment. Lets face it, there are a lot of people out there relying on someone else to provide their happiness. I stay so busy and have hobbies so I know how to make myself happy. Once a chick expects me to do that for her, I am out.

3.) She starts bytching about my hobbies/busy life. Its my life. I choose what I do. The last thing I want to hear is "Your playing golf AGAIN this weekend?" Yep. And next weekend. And the weekend after that. Pretty much any weekend the weather permits. No I dont sit at home if I can be out doing something. If she doesnt like it, she is replaced.

 

[behimo]

I cant argue with that. Even jesus said the same thing.

Today you'll look to find rest by trying to understand your life, or you'll rest in the one who understands everything, including your life.

 

[nicksaiz65]

I get mine cut weekly.

I do every 2 weeks. How much does your barber charge you?

 

[Glassguy]

I do every 2 weeks. How much does your barber charge you?

$15

 

[Infern0]

My issue hasn't ever been about attracting women moreso it was keeping them in my life in a way that was positive.

I have improved that pretty good, still not perfect but overall a lot better than I used to be.

 

[forcerecon01]

It seams being in control is somewhat of an illusion. I think we choose a path and God provides the steps. That isn't to take away from drive desire and passion. Not to me it doesn't.
I have to have faith in something.
[/

I agree

 

[17 shots]

The women that really love me and care about me annoy me, and I usually push them away. Like damn stop smothering me with all your love, stop wanting to talk to me daily, stop calling me first, stop responding to my texts super fast with paragraphs... then months later I look back like damn, that girl really liked me, why was I acting like that with her lol

 

[BeExcellent]

The women that really love me and care about me annoy me, and I usually push them away. Like damn stop smothering me with all your love, stop wanting to talk to me daily, stop calling me first, stop responding to my texts super fast with paragraphs... then months later I look back like damn, that girl really liked me, why was I acting like that with her lol

FWIW this is exactly why men should reach out first & then women respond warmly. It avoids the smothering and maintains some tension & polarity.

It has been my experience as a woman that men get easily bored when a woman isn’t interesting or isn’t intriguing. Keeping something mysterious and uncertain keeps people’s interest.

Men who have been through myriad women (including men in this thread) are seeking someone who is especially unique as a consequence of having so much choice. Women like that exist but are rare. You know, the ones who are smart enough to satisfy your intellect, cool enough to chill with, hot enough to get you hard, and spunky/spontaneous enough to keep you engaged while also keeping some mystery and tension. That’s tough to find in one woman.

The players are used to pretty faces, boobs and bums. Looks are not enough to keep a man whose had lots of women. It’s the deeper characteristics that count. Sex first & get to know later is a strategy MOST players employ because sex has become a commodity really. But sex with someone you are connected to and care about is different. It gets deeper than the physical. It becomes a meeting of the minds/bodies/spirits...but sex right away is never at that depth (reported to me by MANY players who were either close friends (not FWBs) or lovers).

Screen for those deeper characteristics. Release women until you find those characteristics and then allow yourself to express yourself more. Allow yourself to become attached.

That’s how you find a meaningful partnership.

Rotating women isn’t going to get you a meaningful relationship. Those two things are inherently mutually exclusive.

At some point you gotta take a risk and pick somebody to try and share your story with in life.

Don’t take my female opinion about this if you think this is all chick speak look up what Paul Zanka in NYC and comedian Russell Brand have to say about it.

At some point you are perhaps going to want a real human being to human being relationship in your life. Early dating, plate rotating, and starting over with a new line up every 3-4 months isn’t going to get you this.

But there is relatively little content on SS about having a successful meaningful relationship. I think it’s something worth discussing.

And @cola it’s Ok you want to be a hero...most women want a man to be their hero in a sense...just think about what that means.

A little crazy is ok. It just needs to be a type of crazy you can live with.

So those are some thoughts.

 

[17 shots]

Screen for those deeper characteristics. Release women until you find those characteristics and then allow yourself to express yourself more. Allow yourself to become attached.

That’s how you find a meaningful partnership.

Rotating women isn’t going to get you a meaningful relationship. Those two things are inherently mutually exclusive.

At some point you gotta take a risk and pick somebody to try and share your story with in life.

Can I gently pull on your hair while I cry

 

[samspade]

/Edit

I had a reply typed, but ah, thought better of it.