Attracting older women

[Caveman]

This is not a problem or a question. It's just something that caught my attention and I would like to see what your take on this is.

All my life I had older women being attracted to me for some reason. I'm not quite sure if this is cuz I am comming across as sophisticated, the ideal 'son-in-law' or because I look like an old fart D). Many women tell me: "If I had been your age I would have defenitely made a move on you" In the process many of them try and find out if I am open to the idea of me being interested going out with an older woman. Now, I don't have to complain about attention from girls my own age I'm just wondering about this.

My personal opinion would be that older women have less time to play silly girlish games and get straight to the point.

Any of you experienced the same thing and if yes, what's your take on it?

 

[Austin Allegro]

First of all, you need to define 'older'. Do you mean 30 ish, 40ish or 50ish?

I think a lot of it comes down to hormones. Post menopausal women tend to admire young AFCs and say 'you'd make a great husband' 'If I were your age I'd go out with you' etc, because they are no longer thinking so much in terms of sex.

I used to get this a lot from girls' mothers. In my experience, if a girls' mother really likes you when the girl is under 25, that's the kiss of death, because most younger women want badboys who will create drama. If they create drama in their relationship with their mother, so much the better.

However, once they get past 25-30 women seem to change a bit. They realise they haven't got long before it all goes south and to an extent, the silly games do lessen, although they never go away completely.

 

[FratAndDiddy]

post menopausal women do cut down on the silly games, but they are trained to do the silly games and the skill never leaves them.
it's not that older women have less time to play silly games, its because they back off a bit on the games for the purpose of bagging a man, their looks are going south and need to bag a man, or the tick-tock factor tells them to back off a while so they can drop a baby or two.

 

[Caveman]

Austin.. Older in this case is 35-45.. I think you made an excellent point.. Actually I do get this from moms.. So some of them might mistake me for an AFC since I am very laid-back and kinda quiet. You suppose this could be it?

FratAndDiddy.. Like hell I am going to help them drop some babies.. I like the practise and the practise only!

 

[FratAndDiddy]

i don't blame you there bro !
child support for 18 years is really rough on the wallet; telling the court system where you are and where you work....not fun !
yep, stick with the practice ones

 

[Yotsuya-san]

Once a woman reaches a certain age, they realize that all of this cultivating drama just for drama's sake leads to unneeded stress and a lack of peace of mind. It may be entertaining when it's seen on tv (but then again, I suspect truly mature women would rather be watching something else), but it has no place in the life of a self actualized person. This also leads to a reputation that's hard to change. They want to settle down and get serious. Not neccesarily married or LTR, but they're at the age when they value having someone to talk to. That's not going to happen if they insist on wishing they lived in the world of trash reality TV, a genre that's aimed at the under 25 crowd anyway.

 

[WestCoaster]

Good post, Yotsoya-san.

The thing that truly opened my eyes the last few years was the immaturity of women in their 30's. I was stunned. When I was in my late 20's I dated (and almost stupidly married) a women in her early 30's, already had two kids. She was incredibly immature, very shallow and would not learn her lesson from her previous divorce. Found out she was sleeping around -- goodbye!

Later on in my 30's I dated some women who were equally shallow with no goals and had some of the same habits. Being a naive AFC at the time, I had this stereotype that most women in their 30's actually grew up and that divorced women actually learned from their lessons. WRONG!

Creating drama is stupid and energy-sapping, IMO. What's the purpose? I'm too focused on my career and outside activities and hobbies to troll through needless drama. It's so counter-productive.

And yes, they glean this from mindless TV. Best to find a woman who reads more books than watches TV. If not, you're shot.

* Another thing that shocked me was when I entered grad school a couple years ago, the intelligent/educated 20-25 year olds were more mature than most of the 30-40 year old divorcees I have met/dated.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Caveman, obviously these older women see you as a 'nice' guy!

Older women have wasted their youth on many sex partners and now that they have lost their so-called beauty they can no longer draw the crowd that they once did and are now looking for a 'nice' guy to settle down with in their older ragged years who won't leave them as they physically deteriorate. Hence they want a 'nice' guy - read 'chump' to keep them company in her old age - women hate to be alone - especially in their later years!!

These single older hos would have never wanted you in their youth because they were too busy screwing 'non-nice' guys!!

As they get older they've realized that they miscalculated and should have trapped a man while they had a semblance of beauty/youth. Now they fear it is too late to use their sex appeal because the goods (body) have incurred some major damage and only damaged men (chumps) would want damaged goods in a woman's later years!!! The well has already been sucked dry and only a fool will seek purified water from a dry well - of course the "nice" guy who marries this old ho is the fool!!

 

[Caveman]

Thanks for all of your opinions guys..

In fact I believe you all made good points. I believe i am percieved as a 'nice' guy since i am usually kinda quiet and laid-back. So that's probably why..

Thanks again.

 

[Yotsuya-san]

Originally posted by WestCoaster
Good post, Yotsoya-san.

And yes, they glean this from mindless TV. Best to find a woman who reads more books than watches TV. If not, you're shot.

* Another thing that shocked me was when I entered grad school a couple years ago, the intelligent/educated 20-25 year olds were more mature than most of the 30-40 year old divorcees I have met/dated.

I find that by not having cable TV, I don't feel like I'm missing anything. I'm not ashamed of the fact that I've never watched a single episode of Sex in the City, yet another show that so many misguided women are trying to emulate.

It seems like you had better luck with the girls you met in grad school than I did. But then again, not many girls in my field. However, I did notice that a lot of the ones I did meet, while obviously intelligent and educated were also inexperienced in other areas. I don't mean this in a bad way. As the price to pay for their education, especially in the highly intellectual fields, many do lead sheltered lives and have little contact with men that are not hampered by the same social deficiences that they are. Therefore, sometimes, they become more comfortable with these types of guys than they do with intelligent, educated guys who have been tempered and hardened by the outside world and have varied experiences that have nothing to do with their field of study. Call it the school of hard knocks. Also, I was a slightly older grad student at the time, so I was effectively returning to school after years in the real world. I got along with them fine but despite all we had in common, did these girls find me too cynical, too hardened?

 

[FratAndDiddy]

a woman with looks never loses her game. the ones best are the ones with money and past menopause. they can brag about their bratty grandkids and younger pups still chase them around.

simply tell them to quit sitting so close to you and watch their ego-meter burst. soooo cool !