Are you the nice guy or the good guy?

[soulforge]

What is a nice guy?

I consider myself a good person, in the sense that I don't go out of my way to hurt people. From time to time, I want to be generous to the people I know and care about.

I absolutely don't consider myself a push over, as I can be very firm on my expectations and standards. Disrespect is something I never overlook & would always challenge it whom ever it is coming from.

So when it comes to females, what exactly is it about a guy that makes him the "Nice Guy" in her books?

 

[Dr.Suave]

"Are you the nice guy or the good guy"?

Hmmmm I can tell you this: My girl told me that I gave her Vaginal tingles and that I have a f0ckboy vibe and f0ckboy attitude. I joke with her that I go on a forum to give advice and that my username is Dr. F0ckboy.

Hey @catsmeow2 and @BeExcellent Isnt "Nice Guy" girl code for "Low Value Simp who agrees with everything, doesnt have a backbone, and doesnt give me vaginal tingles"?

I think I have heard the words "Nice Guy" spoken by women both in good and bad context. It depends on How she says those words.

"Soulforge is such a nice guy but I only see him as a friend" = No bueno

"Chad sent me a good morning text after we had unprotected sex and he kum inside me. He is such a nice guy" = Different story

 

[oldmanofthesea]

An orbiter is a perfect example of what women refer to as a "nice guy." It is a guy who gives gives gives while expecting nothing in return other than the chance at romance at some point in time. In addition, most nice guys tend to be very platonic and not very masculine. They don't flirt, they don't challenge her, and they don't escalate. They think that by being platonically friendly, they will win romance.

When I say "challenge her", this can manifest itself in many ways. But one way would be questioning a girl when she says something that doesn't make sense or doesn't satisfy you. Like if you ask a girl, "So what did you like about Arizona?" If she answers with, "I don't know, it's nice." The nice guy response would be, "Oh cool! Yeah I could see that! Awesome!" The proper response is a challenge. Look at her with one raised eyebrow and ask her, "Nice? Ohhhh ok, I totally get it now.... sounds amazing! But seriously though - what did you actually like about it?"

Another way I have heard "nice guy's" defined is, "Someone who makes a contract with someone else without that other person knowing they are entering into a contract." Pretty funny really. In other words, they are doing something nice for someone with the expectation of getting something back, but without telling the other person that they expect something or what they expect.

 

[Mike32ct]

My best guess:

The “nice guy” is a guy that loses points for being too passive around women, but he is also not good looking enough to get away with being direct. He’s pretty much screwed but not in a good way.

All that aside, I think our female posters would be best to answer this. Even after 20 years, I can’t say I can fully wrap my head around why the nice guy is so repulsive.

 

[pipeman84]

Here's the answer from Doc Love, the first man in 6.000 years to understand women.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

This subject will never be settled. There are many factors, traits, and behaviors that can label a guy a "nice guy", "good guy", or "bad/f**k boy". It can also be subjective as one girl will correlate kindness to niceness, and the next girl can still see kindness in a bad boy. Most girls will correlate kindness with a good guy.

The way I see it, a nice guy is a guy that does not have or hold his own boundaries. This person will allow disrespect and others to disregard him. This makes him weak and low to no value. A nice guy will always put himself down to be liked by others aka an agreeable personality which is unnatural. Being nice is by far attractive. It stinks of low confidence and no self-respect.

A good guy is the next step up from a nice guy. Generally speaking, most guys are good guys. Good-hearted and kind that has boundaries but does not always uphold them. This is your typical beta blue pill provider. The guy that most females say they want.

A bad boy is a guy that knows well his worth and what he deserves so most girls don't phase him. Simply put, he has options. Therefore often ignores women and prioritizes his path and entertainment. He is full of mystery because he will not treat a girl like Disney has taught them they should be treated. He is also full of drama because this attitude often touches the jerk/ass**le behavior realm. Deep down women love drama so this is an attractive quality.

I have an article about this dilemma but it is for paid members so I will not post it here as my intention is not to profit from this forum. But you are welcome to read it.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Literally the only thing you need to know is that you are a "nice guy" anytime you act in a way you normally wouldn't act or do/say something you normally wouldn't do/say in order to gain something from her. Whether that be her approval, a kiss, sex, etc...

This almost always works against guys as women know why they are acting in this way and view it as weak behavior.

Guys that agree with everything a woman says and have no opinion of their own, guys that do things expecting to get something in return, etc etc etc...

That's it. Just don't act in this manner and you'll avoid being a nice guy. It is the not the act in and of itself, it is the expectation that goes with it...ie, tit for tat, quid pro quo, etc.

I do something nice for you, that means I am entitled to you having sex with me. That's literally how these numnuts think.

 

[Fortune_favors_the_bold]

Being a nice guy is not even about the desire to have something in return, most of them simply have such low self esteem that they believe it's their role to be like that.

Guys that never had the chance to do anything, create anything but have been programmed from their single mothers and absent fathers not to be a problem to anyone.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

A “Nice Guy” is just a kinder way of telling you that she’s not attracted to you. However, guys take this too extreme and think they have to go full prison greaser mode to attract girls.

 

[SW15]

A “Nice Guy” is just a kinder way of telling you that she’s not attracted to you. However, guys take this too extreme and think they have to go full prison greaser mode to attract girls.

It is better to be perceived as a huge douchebag than a nice guy.

A good guy is a guy who sets boundaries and is physically attractive.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

It is better to be perceived as a huge douchebag than a nice guy.

A good guy is a guy who sets boundaries and is physically attractive.

girl that she finds some attraction to is a douchebag or @$$hole, an ugly guy that's not nice to her is what lol?

 

[Serenity]

"Nice guy" is rarely ever used literally, as in a guy just simply being nice. The term doesn't seem to describe one distinct type of guy except they all having a lack of authenticity in common.

There's the guy acting nice even when treated poorly because they're afraid of standing up for themselves, but really they're just perceived as pushovers.

There's the guy acting nice expecting to gain something, they get toxic when the woman doesn't fulfill his desires. Hidden expectations is not how niceness works and it's not nice at all.

There's the guy thinking they're the nicest person around, they're really just delusional and extremely entitled. This is easily noticed by women and they avoid it.

None of the above types are actually nice because they're insincere and act nice either out of fear of being genuine or purely as a means to an end. Actually nice people are usually nice to be around, the above guys are not... It's a misconception among some men that being nice is just bad all around, but if you have clear boundaries and don't use niceness in not so nice ways, then there's nothing wrong with it in moderation.

The one advantage a jerk has over these "nice guys" is that the jerk is at least not hiding his honest opinion behind fake niceness out of fear or purely selfish gain. To the women who have bad and recent experience with a "nice guy" it will seem like a breath of fresh air to meet an assh0le who's at least honest about what he thinks, even though he might still ultimately be toxic to be around.

 

[Pierce.Manhammer]

Let me ask this:

Are you wanting to be the nice guy? Or avoid being him?

LTR or Plate?

But always remember:

Every woman wants a bad man that's being a good man just for her, and every man wants a good girl that's a naughty girl just for him.

What is a nice guy?

I consider myself a good person, in the sense that I don't go out of my way to hurt people. From time to time, I want to be generous to the people I know and care about.

I absolutely don't consider myself a push over, as I can be very firm on my expectations and standards. Disrespect is something I never overlook & would always challenge it whom ever it is coming from.

So when it comes to females, what exactly is it about a guy that makes him the "Nice Guy" in her books?

 

[soulforge]

Some interesting replies here. I have come to realise that I have a mixture of douch bag traits and then some nice/good guy traits.

For example... Sexualy I am pretty aggressive/dominant.. I don't do nice in the bedroom haha and I often talk to them in person/or text in a sexualy dominant way.

I give them orders etc, sometimes randomly I will tell her to turn around and bend over, so I can then spank her ass.. they happily comply.

I'm also not afraid to lead, and just tell her what we are doing for the day for example, if where we are going out for the day. I don't mind saying things that might upset or annoy her..

This one chick absolutely hates

On the odd occasion I let them maybe make a decision, however I prefer to lead vast majority of time. They also can tell that I am not afraid to speak my mind or even get angry from time to time.

Where I become the Nice/Good guy is.. I'm pretty reliable when it comes to texting. Even though I mirror them when it comes to response time, I tend to keep regular daily communication going (not over texting)

Sometimes woman get too comfortable with the communication. I wouldn't mind being the douche who forgets to text some days, takes a night to get back to her, cancels a date or two due to other chit..

I think naturally I don't like to play games or cause uneccasary drama and stress.

 

[retardedautist2020]

es

Nice Guy - compliant beta
Good Guy - respectful alpha
The Guy - doesn’t give a shrt what women think

Be The Guy

This is a good way to see things. I feel we can only be one of the above, and it’s ok. Just don’t be the nice guy.

 

[LTG71]

The problem with these definitions is that women themselves don’t know what they want. It all depends on their mood. Look at it from the male perceptive.

A ”nice guy” is like a used car salesman. He’s trying to find a connection to make a sale and will grease you up before sealing the deal. He’s not genuine and is only working you to get what he wants, a sale. He’ll make conversation and try to find a crack to work his way in.

A “good guy” is your buddy that spends several weekends helping you fix your car and only accepts a few beers as payment. He’s got skills and wants to help out because he doesn’t want a mechanic to rip you off. He’s not looking for anything in return. Helping you is his reward.

Women can sense this “nice guy” vibe too and know when they’re being worked. The guy that follows her around like a little puppy dog is annoying. He will do everything she wants without hesitation and that dries her up.

At the same time, she will flirt and sweet talk the “good guy” to get him to fix her car. Problem is, now she is acting like the used car salesman. Using her sex appeal and manipulation to get what she needs. Once she gets the car fixed, she happily drives away and fux a third guy, “the a$$hole”.

An “a$$hole” Is a guy that doesn’t care what she wants and makes her work for everything. He plays with her emotions, acts like a jerk and yet she thinks “she can fix him.” What is it with women always trying to ”fix” guys?

As men, we want to befriend or be like the “good guy”. Someone that is dependable and kindhearted, a “stand up” guy. Someone that always has your back. Problem is women don’t appreciate that guy or find him boring. They’ll use that guy but will fvck the other. Then years later after dating a$$holes exclusively, they become damaged and say “men are trash“, “where are all the good guys?” Um, the “good guys” are everywhere you look, you just didn’t give them the time of day because you b!tches are CRAZY!

 

[soulforge]

The problem with these definitions is that women themselves don’t know what they want. It all depends on their mood. Look at it from the male perceptive.

A ”nice guy” is like a used car salesman. He’s trying to find a connection to make a sale and will grease you up before sealing the deal. He’s not genuine and is only working you to get what he wants, a sale. He’ll make conversation and try to find a crack to work his way in.

A “good guy” is your buddy that spends several weekends helping you fix your car and only accepts a few beers as payment. He’s got skills and wants to help out because he doesn’t want a mechanic to rip you off. He’s not looking for anything in return. Helping you is his reward.

Women can sense this “nice guy” vibe too and know when they’re being worked. The guy that follows her around like a little puppy dog is annoying. He will do everything she wants without hesitation and that dries her up.

At the same time, she will flirt and sweet talk the “good guy” to get him to fix her car. Problem is, now she is acting like the used car salesman. Using her sex appeal and manipulation to get what she needs. Once she gets the car fixed, she happily drives away and fux a third guy, “the a$$hole”.

An “a$$hole” Is a guy that doesn’t care what she wants and makes her work for everything. He plays with her emotions, acts like a jerk and yet she thinks “she can fix him.” What is it with women always trying to ”fix” guys?

As men, we want to befriend or be like the “good guy”. Someone that is dependable and kindhearted, a “stand up” guy. Someone that always has your back. Problem is women don’t appreciate that guy or find him boring. They’ll use that guy but will fvck the other. Then years later after dating a$$holes exclusively, they become damaged and say “men are trash“, “where are all the good guys?” Um, the “good guys” are everywhere you look, you just didn’t give them the time of day because you b!tches are CRAZY!

Best to be the sociopathic douche then lol