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Anti-Dump's Machine (Part VIII: Approaching Women)


Master Don Juan
Jul 22, 2000
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Approaching the Women

This differs for everyone. Here is how Anti-Dump did it:

I always approach women by giving 'unsolicitated advice'. Ever have someone make a comment and you didn't ask for advice? Annoying isn't it? But it works with women. The 'advice' must be positive and you are supporting the women's choice.

Suppose she's looking at a coat. I would approach and say "that coat will definitely keep you warm this winter." She would then turn and look at me and make a comment back. Then you ask for her name.

You are not saying "That looks good on you". It's not flattery.
It has to be PRACTICAL advice. Like a better shoe polish.

An hour ago a woman in a supermarket parking lot was loading groceries into her trunk as I was walking past. She was starting to reach UNDER the cart to get the groceries. I almost said "Yea. Don't forget those. Did you ever forget stuff under there? What a pain, huh? What's your name?"

Give positive advice that HELPS the woman. It must be REAL and SINCERE. "Sometime you should take the RED bus. It will get you to London a half an hour faster.

What's your name?"

"Excuse me. You should definitely put some air in that tire (low tire). You'll get a flat soon. What's your name?"

Asking for her name will signal her you are in 'Romantic Mode'.

She has to know your intentions.
Then she will either talk or 'reject' (low interest) you.

The best places to use this are at social gatherings or fairs and events. Where there are lots of people. My examples are for the street only to show that it can be done anywhere if necessary.

I gave you the HARDEST places.

Then you ask for her HOME phone number. The actual conversation you 'carry on' before the number is something you have to INVENT yourself. I can't tell you that. It has to fit your style.

The first date should be a fun or action date. I say "Let's do comedy." It's not action but it's certainly FUN! The idea is not to have 'discussions'.

Swimming is good in the summer.
I have a row boat. "Hey, Ginger, let's take my boat out saturday.
I'll bring it by at 4:00PM."

You: "Miss Perfect. Let's rent a boat on Sunday. I'll come over at 1:00PM (no car).

She doesn't want to be bored by your stupid ideas (you know what I mean). Bore her AFTER she falls in love. Talk about things you see."Look at the size of that dog!" or "Come on. I want to buy my little brother a balloon." But it has to be the TRUTH! Never lie.

The next three dates should be like bowling, miniature golf, indoor rock climbing (Credit: Obidexx), fencing (Credit: Cecil) etc. After the date take her right home. Do it smoothly and like your still interested in her.

No kiss on the first date. You only kiss her if you think she had a bad time with you. It's a test. Sometimes she may look like she had a bad time BUT DIDN'T!

So you kiss her to see if pulls away or gives you her cheek to kiss. If she had a great time never kiss her. It makes her hope you will kiss her next time.

Or, she has to give you a second date to get one! Never discuss the second date with her. Always call. Never discuss the first date. "Let's get together some time. Want to go to dinner?"

NEVER SAY THAT. Ask for the number. Then TELL her what it is when you call.

About sex. I always go as long as I can stand it. The longer the better. I want them to WANT IT when I make my move. This is true: One woman pushed me into her bedroom and knock me down on her bed. She couldn't stand the wait! Another women snarled "Are we going to do it or what?!!!"

It's great when they WANT IT. You look for the signs. I use heavy 'touching' for about a month. They let you know when they are ready.

All women must give me an AIDS TEST result. No exceptions.

As you can see, there's no sexual harassment here. None of my advice forces a woman to do anything she doesn't want to do. If I don't get her home phone number I walk away. And so should you.
This is Anti-Dump’s Machine in a nutshell. I like how Anti-Dump does not give them the kiss or the sex. This DEFINITELY drives them nuts.

No flowers, cards, or gifts for about three months.

The fun times will make up for that. The 'nice guy' routine is over. After she tells you she loves you, THEN buy her some flowers. But don't over do it.
Dee-Zy asks about the first date. Anti-Dump responded:

Just do stuff that doesn't cost anything.

You live in Canada. "Wanda. Let's go ice skating on friday. I'll be over to get you at 7:00 PM"
I'm sure there are free or $2.00 ice rinks you could go to. I know it's summer. He,he,he!!!

What about swimming? What about volleyball? "Let's play volleyball. I'll be over at..."

Okay, these are probably not cool things to do. But I warned you I am older (boy am I older!) than you. Find COOL things to do. Any Hip-hop bands that give free concerts in your area? "Let's go see M+M. He's doing a FREE benefit in Toronto. My parents will drive us."

"Let's meet for coffee." And you will tell her everything she hates.
You: "So, I like M+M. He's cool."
Her: How could you like a disgusting person like that. That's what you like? I'm outta here."
But don’t women like men who are creative? Shouldn’t we do what women want?

Whenever you hear yourself saying "women like creativity. or 'WOMEN LIKE...' stick your finger in a light socket.

You have it REVERSED. You should be saying to her "I like skiing. Do you?" "I like bowling. Do you?"

You don't give a girl what SHE wants. YOU FIND A GIRL THAT LIKES WHAT YOU WANT. Later you ask her what she likes after she accepts you first.

NEVER cook a dinner for a woman unless you are engaged to be married! And the ring is on her finger! She has to be taken out of circulation. Imagine doing that and next week you see her with Stan the Man.

Use your CREATIVE mind to find ways for the girls to like what you want.

Otherwise you are building a road to DUMP ZONE HELL.

Hope I haven't ruffled your feathers. I used to do all that stuff buddy. Here's a tip:

Women don't give a damm about all that. All they want is a guy they can count on when their car breaks down on a dark road. Or a guy that will LISTEN (not talk) when disaster strikes their life. A man of action. A Rock. A man that can BE THERE.

Think about it.
Now I am going to quote Vassago. He will be infuriated that I am quoting him in this Anti-Dump thread which is reason enough to do so.

Personally, I think the player has a better chance of finding a long term relationship. He meets more women so he has more options to choose from, he has more game so he can get the one he wants, and most importantly, he doesn't come from a place of need. I know that when I was hooking up with alot of women I always had long term relationship options, but when I decided to settle down and find someone special, everything seemed to dry out. I have met all of my past loves at times when the last thing on my mind was a girlfriend. Women can smell neediness a mile away, and I think that is the biggest factor. Of course there is also social proof, the challenge of taming a bad boy, the primal attraction to a dangerous man, etc, that all adds to the attraction, but at the same time if you go over the edge and become too much of a male slut it will come back to haunt you.

I have noticed that the guys who get the highest quality women are those guys who you cant really put into a catagory. Guys who have one women all of time, and that one women changes every couple months until they find one that they can totally connect with. They always treat these women well, but they dont settle for anything less then the best.

These are the real players. You'll never know it by talking to them, but you will here the women talk about them because they are dying to be the next in line.
This fits perfectly with Anti-Dump’s Machine. You first need to figure out what you want and NOT COME AT A GIRL FROM A POSITION OF NEED.

A guy who puts every facet of his life into chasing sex is pathetic. But the guy going through chicks to find the one that HE wants, that is the way. I don’t consider that to be a ‘player’ but if it is, then I’m certainly a player.

Improving yourself makes everything easier but you STILL have to be SOCIAL and go out and meet all the chicks. THEY want to meet you so give them that opportunity.

The ‘seduction’ material is only good to GET YOU OUTSIDE (since that is where the girls are) and blasting your old social barriers. It is *very* limited and shouldn’t be taken seriously or (the worse) taken as a life philosophy.

The good of the PUA is how he can meet many chicks. This is Vassago's point. But this is also a core element of Anti-Dump's Machine. You will probably go through as many or even more than a PUA. The difference is that the PUA is trying to sex the girl while the Machine is trying to see if she fits into your world.

It is a huge difference.


Senior Don Juan
Jan 26, 2003
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Out of the whole of the series, I find this one speaks to me the most.

Lots of good thoughts here...so quality will come with quantity eh?

I better get crackin...:eek:



Senior Don Juan
Jan 21, 2003
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I will never cook for a woman again.... :mad:


Master Don Juan
Oct 13, 2003
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I don't know, I'm no MDJ, so I could be wrong here. But this does not seem too bright to me. Well, if it works for you its good, and if a Pook recommends it, there is some value to it. However, it doesn't seem my style, it seems so lame and dry. "Don't forget those"? I'm sure women notice the rest of the groceries they have in their cart. This just seems... incompatible with my style.


Senior Don Juan
Jan 21, 2003
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I think you missed the point, and the point wasnt to copy that line to use it on woman.


"If you love women, you must read the SoSuave Guide to Women. It's fantastic!"


Master Don Juan
Nov 8, 2003
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New Member
Jan 11, 2013
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Critics on Anti-Dump that he didn't focus on the 'attracting' part totally miss the point Anti-Dump was making (ANYONE can attract women. I was attracting women when I was even a NICE GUY.


After reading your concept how to approach women, I really felt pity on you. Such attempts and moves can easily recognize for a women. They understand what in the opposite person's mind by such stupid moves. Try behaving them normally; they will also act in normal way.

snore stop