26 and never had a gf ... very depressed about it

[bobbob]

I'm 26 and I've never had a gf. I haven't had a date in years. I feel like less of a man because of it. The worse part is I'm not that hopeful that things are going to change ...

I've read the dj bible and a lot of the posts here. They're great, I really wish I had known about this a few years ago. Back then I had much more confidence, and if I saw a woman I was attracted to, I didn't have much of a problem going up to her. Although I may have been nervous, at least I'd make the effort.

Now, I feel like I don't have a chance in hell, so I don't go up to any women I see. I know from experience that the women I'm attracted to, don't dig my type (skinny). I haven't gotten a phone number since April.

I've been working out for almost a year, and haven't put on any weight.

Sorry if this sounds lame, I just had to vent. It's frustrating as hell, and very depressing at times.

peace

 

[Slickster]

Poor attitude gets you no where

Knock it off

 

[-HPNOTIQ-]

Originally posted by Oxide
Cry me a river....oooohhhh
Cry me a river......ahhhhh
Cry me a river.................




Seriously man, wtf?

Oxide...you never pull any punches do ya bro?

But seriously bobbob..if you've spent any time on this board, reading the posts on here and understanding the stuff written..you should have known you'd be flamed for such a sappy, "FEEL SORRY FOR ME", excuse for a post.

We aren't here to be your emotional tampon. You found the site..great! You read the DJB..great! You are changing your life around...great! But hell, for you first post...you're going to post some boo woo stuff about I've never had a GF at 26 crap.

Leave the AFC talk at home bro. You want specific help..you've come to the right place...but man, leave your Klenex at home.

We don't need to be your cheerleaders...you ALREADY KNOW wtf you have to do FROM NOW ON...so stop your whining..stop feeling sorry for yourself...prove me wrong..prove all those women who turned you down wrong.

PROVE YOUR F*CKING SELF WRONG!

 

[ogre]

yo bobbob

be glad you're finding out about this stuff now. look at my age. man you are soooooo lucky. you are ONLY 26. I wish I knew this stuff when I was 26. look at my post, "tool old, too late?" Study this forum, ask questions, and get out there and practice. but don't dump your emotional puke on us, I got enough of my own to fill a freight train.

 

[Beethoven]

Originally posted by bobbob
I've been working out for almost a year, and haven't put on any weight.

If you think that working out is the best way to make yourself bigger, you haven't spent enough time here:

SoSuave's Health & Fitness Forum

Seriously, the skinny guy's battle is fought in the kitchen, not in the gym.

Anyway, I'm 26 too, and from what I've seen of women, they're happy to hook up all the way into your 30s without much problem. Check out some of JT47319's posts on the main discussion forum for what a 26 year old can do.

 

[WaterTiger]

Originally posted by bobbob
I'm 26 and I've never had a gf. I haven't had a date in years. I feel like less of a man because of it. The worse part is I'm not that hopeful that things are going to change ...

I've read the dj bible and a lot of the posts here. They're great, I really wish I had known about this a few years ago. Back then I had much more confidence, and if I saw a woman I was attracted to, I didn't have much of a problem going up to her. Although I may have been nervous, at least I'd make the effort.

Now, I feel like I don't have a chance in hell, so I don't go up to any women I see. I know from experience that the women I'm attracted to, don't dig my type (skinny). I haven't gotten a phone number since April.

I've been working out for almost a year, and haven't put on any weight.

Sorry if this sounds lame, I just had to vent. It's frustrating as hell, and very depressing at times. Peace

What a warm and compassionate bunch of guys! Bobbob, I bet you're SO glad you posted here

I also bet you think I'm going to be all sweet and comforting because I'm a woman...(evil chuckle)...foolish, foolish young man!

You're skinny and think women don't like you because of it?
Funny, skinny doesn't seem to stop 90% of male rock stars from pulling stunning women! Learn to play the guitar So you're thin! There are guys on this site who'd KILL to be thin. But they still go out and DJ. There is a guy on this site who's deaf! He still goes out and works it! There's another in a wheelchair. Does he sit there and say girls won't like me because.... NO! He goes out and TRIES! No excuses...You march right over there to that cute girl and get her number! MOVE IT MISTER!

You haven't gotten a phone number since April?
Have you asked for any? How many have you asked for? How do you expect to get numbers when you don't tell a woman write them down? I don't care if she won't like you because you're thin! That was already addressed. No excuses! If she turns you down, then tell her:
"Sorry Dude! Didn't realize you were a transvestite. Great outfit by the way. Peace!"
Then go ask another woman.

You've been working out and haven't put on any weight?
They have a great health and fitness section on this site. Read the bulking up and cutting threads. Hire a personal trainer, sign up for a work-out partner at your gym. Find the hugest, most muscle bound guy and ask him how he got that way.

Things don't just change....YOU have to change them! The universe isn't here to make you happy or provide you with oppertunities. You have to go out and MAKE your own luck. You are the Captian of your own destiny. Put your hands on the wheel and steer!

 

[ShortTimer]

Originally posted by bobbob
I've been working out for almost a year, and haven't put on any weight.

Before I saw any results I had to hire myself a personal trianer and nutritionist. It's really not that expensive, and if you don't know enough about how the whole bodybuilder diet / exercise thing works then this is a good way to start. It also helps to keep you motivated, although honestly you need for the motivation to come from within you and not be some external pressure.

 

[Bungo Pony]

I've read the dj bible and a lot of the posts here.

That's nice. Reading can be a pastime. The only way you're going to make any kind of a difference is if you kick your ass out the door and work on what you've learned here. If you don't practice what you learn, you're going to keep on making whiny posts like the one you just made. GET YOUR ASS OUT THE DOOR AND PRACTICE!

I know from experience that the women I'm attracted to, don't dig my type (skinny).

You're full of 5hit. Have you really read the DJ bible? You might want to read it again since you didn't learn a damn thing. Women don't care about looks as much as personality. Make yourself attractive through your personality and the whole issue of looks will disappear.

I've been working out for almost a year, and haven't put on any weight.

Have you been reading Maxim magazine? I remember flipping through one in 7-11 and there was an article that said "the best way to attract a woman is have a nice body". I don't know who the hell wrote that article, but they need a serious kick in the head. I'm not incredibly thin (I've got a bit of a belly) but that sure as hell didn't stop the women from wanting to go out with me. It was all in my attitude and personality. So what if you're skinny? I'd love to be a size 30 again. Be happy that you're not one of those really fat lardass guys who loses his breath from answering the telephone, and who's ass looks like six cats fighting in a bag when he walks. Take some fvcking pride in yourself.

 

[Don Ronny]

Some of the biggest players i know are skinny-assed mofos!

Stop making excuses for failure! Your problem is not that you are skinny.

Here is your real problem...

Now, I feel like I don't have a chance in hell, so I don't go up to any women I see

I bet the first time Michael Jordan picked up a basketball, he thought he didnt have a chance to get to the NBA and become the worlds best player. How did he do it? By trying and failing repeatedly.

Everytime you "fail" you learn what not to do and you change your appraoch accordingly. With each lesson you gain confidence.. Not the fake kind of confidence you get from reading a post, but REAL deeply rooted confidence based on your own progress!

Stop trying to preserve your fragile ego and go face those rejections! Seduction is a numbers game. You could randomly walk up to tons of gals and ask them out with no game whatsoever and 1 out of 10 is bound to say yes.

Stop whining and make this happen you silly B1tch!!

 

[Golden Arms]

boo - hooo !!

I am 28 and never had a gf and I don't give a sh!t ! I don't think there is much more I can add to what already has been said on this thread, so I won't repeat what's already been said numerous times by everyone else

You can't gain any weight ? What is your diet like ? Remember your diet is about 90 % of what you look like, the other 10 % is in the gym. PM me if you need additional advice.

 

[Le Parisien]

Damn I typed a very long reply and ths forum just lost it because of some timeout and ****.

Anyway, don't feel so down man, keep working on yourself and opportunities are bound to smile at you sooner or later if you are always "ready".

I'm kinda in a similar case although to a lesser degree. I do get depressed sometimes, because after all we are only human, there's only that much that we can take.
But again, don't let the negativity monopolize your life, every brief depression is just the beginning of a stronger mind and bigger determination to improve yourself and embrace life.

I was very depressed just three days ago because of something in "this" field, but now I'm back on track again. I'm not some kind of superman with a very tough mind or anything, so if I can do it, SO CAN YOU!!!

 

[WestCoaster]

How about 19-year olds in the kiddie forum?

There's a difference in the way a 19-year old writes (smart a$$) and the way others write here.

There's the kiddie forum (high school) for 19-year olds, why are they posting here?

Or they could go to the liar's forum (main board), where everyone has b-nged Brittney, Christina, Raquel Welch when she was young, and everyone in between, and they make six figures and never went to college, and all drive Lexuses.

So either reply with class or go to a different forum. The guy asked a sincere question.

 

[TooColdUlrick]

okay, bobbob, you read the Bible? you know what you need to do and how to do it. i'm sick of people coming here saying "I can't". especially since all of the evidence says that you CAN. quit being such a fukking pvssy. you will NEVER turn it around with your attitude. NEVER!

why can't people like you come here and say, "you know, i am AFC and i feel as though i've missed out. but after finding this site, i have direction and i'm so excited about making a positive turn with my life. i can't wait to get started!"

but, noooooooooooo....

i want you to rewrite your original post and make it as positive as possible. i'm not kidding. it'll be good for you.

you are allowed no more than 10 posts before your first LR (lay report). go out and get yourself an ugly azz chick and fukk her brains out. she'll thank you for it too. man, anything, just get started.


[EDIT: i take that back, ogre's post was positive, he's rarin' to go]

 

[Chrispy]

Watch the movie 'Big Fish' and you'll realize how you're thinking is weak. Improve yourself, grow bigger, and don't get caught. But when you find your woman, grab her and win her over!

I know so many people who have had many ex's but their personality is complete $h** - this includes girls and guys. So look for ways to be upbeat and look for things and people who are positive.

In times of venting, come back to the forum, and get ideas on how to be a DJ, not an AFC.

 

[WestCoaster]

Women are not the panacea to life

While many will come in here and tell you to bulk up, hit the weight room, go get numbers and try, try, try for that girlfriend, I have a different solution:

Don't try.

Oh, I'm sure I'll get flamed for this but your thinking is off. You're thinking a woman will complete you, make you whole, that women are the panacea to all your problems.

They're not. One of the foundations of DJism is a detatchment from such thinking in that what revolves around your life -- your career, your health, your hobbies, etc. -- is really your true happiness. This hit the weight room stuff is OK (I lift fairly regularly) but I've seen more guys with bad bodies who have hot women on their arms, than weight room geeks. Those guys who look average with the hot women? They're DJs, plain and simple.

Women are the nice side dish in life but not the main meal. I've preached this many times. Once you understand that you'll be happy.

All of my friends who put women first are either in bad marriages, going through divorces, contemplating cheating, are in debt, or are in misery.

My friends (and me) who have not put women first are much happier and more successful.

And believe it or not -- contrary to AFC belief -- once you quit caring so much about women, they come out of the woodwork.

Make efforts to meet women but don't make it the focul point of your life.

 

[WestCoaster]

Clarification

Oxide is right, you gotta try.

I guess my theory would be to not try so hard.

Ever notice how the great athletes don't look like they're trying, while the wannabe starts are always grimacing and flexing?

Those Olympic swimmers Thorpe and Phelps are smooth as silk in the water. They look like they're not going all out, but they are. But they're so smooth they're flying by all the flexing, grimacing guys.

So in a nutshell, yes read the DJ Bible, yes go out there and take some swings at the plate (many swings), but don't make a big deal out of it. Don't be too bummed if you get shut down, just move on. Women really aren't worth getting depressed about, and take it from a reformed AFC, I spent many years being depressed about the species of human flesh.

 

[AgonyUncle]

Originally posted by bobbob


I've been working out for almost a year, and haven't put on any weight.


peace

Get yourself a decent Winstrol stack

Hey, sometimes cheating pays off.

 

[bobbob]

Hi, to all the people who are being brutal with their posts, thanks!

I was being a little b**ch, sorry.

For real, I'm not usually like that or have that mentality. I go anywhere from depressed to positive and hopeful (and I can make that wild swing in the same day).

Please keep up the brutal posts, cause next time I feel depressed I can come back to this post and it will talk some sense into me. And motivate me.

I have one semester left in school. I am going to go all out and just go up to every single girl I think is attractive. If I get shot down, I won't give a ****, cause this is the last time I'll ever be in school (with so many attractive young women around).

If any of you feel like saying the meanest @#$% you could possibly say, call me names, whatever, please do it!! It will serve to motivate me, so I thank you in advance. Or say something positive, that motivates too. I just want to save this post for the future (to keep me on the right track)

thanks

 

[Dirtheart]

If any of you feel like saying the meanest @#$% you could possibly say, call me names, whatever, please do it!!

Your mother is a wh0re!!!!

 

[Bumble-B]

Wanting to change is one thing.

When you really want that change with everything that is in you, it's an entirely different thing. You must convince yourself that you CAN change, but you must want that change enough to be willing to sacrifice your comfort zone for it. Yes, start little by little to DO things which you don't really feel comfortable about but you know that they're good for you.

The key here is that you need to feel comfortable with who you are before anyone else can really feel comfortable with you. If you don't believe in yourself, then don't expect others to. Actually think about things you'd like to have done in your life, think about the person who you'd like to be one day and start living as if you're ALREADY there. The person who you'd like to be does certain things that make him that way, he experienced certain things that got him where to that point. Do those things. It WILL require effort on your part. But that effort won't feel like an effort once you're aware of the positive results it will bring you.

A little excersice that has helped many people to make changes: To get yourself motivated to take the effort for making changes you can start to think of yourself 5, 10 and 20 years from now if you've NOT made these changes. Really think of what you'll become in 20 years if you stay like this.... now snap out of it and think of what you can become in 20 years if you start making little positive changes TODAY. How happy you are then that you've made these changes today, how successful you will be with women, and in every area of your life. Entirely different, eh?

You have to understand that you CAN make permanent changes in your life. It is so important to start doing the things you'd be doing if you already were that ideal person you want to be. Make your own decisions based on what you believe is right for you. Decide right after reading this what steps you are going to take to become your ideal self. You should be able to think of at least 3 things you can do right now, tomorrow and the day after that. Once you're rolling there's no way to stop you!

Once you're happy with yourself, people will automatically want to know you and be your friend. You'll have women approaching you! I'm sure you've read it in the DJ Bible, but you can't hear it too much: confidence is the key to hapiness.

Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt... so I know what I'm talking about. I'm not my ideal person yet, but I'm well on the way. I hope this helps you and others who need encouragement. Sorry for the long post, I didn't expect it to become so long!

Bumble-B