Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

25 yr old + unmarried women are AFCs with no game

Pandora

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 11, 2008
Messages
3,205
Reaction score
3,112
Age
38
If you are 25+ and you are not married and not in a serious relationship then the problem is you ( as a woman). Usually these women just don't get good dating advice. I used to have female friends that i would give dating advice to. I have a little sister in her early 20s. They all called me with the most retarded ideas about what they should be doing. The advice women get from dating magazines is "Be a challenge". Some advice says " dont text back too quickly". This is all ridiculous advice. Women are even clueless about what will keep a guy. This is why many put out quickly not realizing that they are shooting themselves in the foot.

We have this idea that women are socially more advanced than men when it comes to dating. This is absolutely false. They come off as more advanced because they have sexual bargaining power. This is their only trump card. Most post 25+ have no game. They are clueless. This is why they are single and cant figure out why. I feel sorry for them because many of them actually mean well. Its just that they dont know what works to keep a man. No one teaches them. They think that putting out quickly or not texting back or playing hard to get keeps a guy.

The women that get it right are the ones that are married. These woman have true "game". These women are functional reasonable humans and are married early. They usually come from small town America and married an average dude. They didnt play too many games. They got married in their very early twenties and moved on with their lives. Getting that wedding ring from a guy that is stable and wants to provide for you is the definition of a female Don Juan. What we are seeing now is girls that are left over. The AFC of women is what is left over. These are girls that cant spot, attract (non sexually) and keep a guy to save their life. I asked one of my female relatives that is very attractive and single why she passed up good guys. She said "because they are boring". Case closed. That is a female AFC. No game. So she wont reach her goal of wife and kids.

Now a caveat to this is ugly girls. They actually have it rough. This only applies to average to hot chicks.
 

Scars

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 20, 2007
Messages
2,158
Reaction score
1,019
Age
34
Location
Phoenix
I think this applies to both men and woman. Once you're 25+, never married, and had a string bad relationships that never worked, maybe the problem is actually YOU. Or you seem to attract the wrong company. I'll be 28 in a couple days. All the girls I know from high school who were hot are either married, fat, or just complete nut cases (I think this is the kind of woman you are trying to describe.) Once you hit this age, it's really slim pickings.. you're going to end up with a chick with a lot of emotional issues and baggage or you're going to end up being a step-daddy.. straight up.

Lucky for us, men generally only get better looking with age.. woman at this age are at the tail end of their youth and are beginning to realize all those old tricks are no longer working.
 

Scars

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 20, 2007
Messages
2,158
Reaction score
1,019
Age
34
Location
Phoenix
What's equally as damaging is the influence her friends and family give. Have you ever heard of the statement "you are the sum of the 5 closest people you associate with"? I think this is entirely true in all aspects of life. If you really want to know someone.. look at the people they hang around, it should give you a pretty good idea.
 

Pandora

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 11, 2008
Messages
3,205
Reaction score
3,112
Age
38
I think this applies to both men and woman. Once you're 25+, never married, and had a string bad relationships that never worked, maybe the problem is actually YOU. Or you seem to attract the wrong company. I'll be 28 in a couple days. All the girls I know from high school who were hot are either married, fat, or just complete nut cases (I think this is the kind of woman you are trying to describe.) Once you hit this age, it's really slim pickings.. you're going to end up with a chick with a lot of emotional issues and baggage or you're going to end up being a step-daddy.. straight up.

Lucky for us, men generally only get better looking with age.. woman at this age are at the tail end of their youth and are beginning to realize all those old tricks are no longer working.
yeh bro i kinda agree with you. I know that i am messed up. Ive had good women before and i could be married. But like LARaiders85 said its not exactly equal playing field. Because i had to really settle because as a man i never really had too many options. But these women have endless options to find the guy that they want (within reason) and they still couldnt find him. Trust me if i had 100 messages in my dating inbox a month, best believe i would have found a wife by now. I think most guys would have.
 

Scars

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 20, 2007
Messages
2,158
Reaction score
1,019
Age
34
Location
Phoenix
yeh bro i kinda agree with you. I know that i am messed up. Ive had good women before and i could be married. But like LARaiders85 said its not exactly equal playing field. Because i had to really settle because as a man i never really had too many options. But these women have endless options to find the guy that they want (within reason) and they still couldnt find him. Trust me if i had 100 messages in my dating inbox a month, best believe i would have found a wife by now. I think most guys would have.
Yeah, I agree with this. I would say it looks a lot more fishy when a woman is 25-30, no kids, and never married than it does for a man in the same situation. You know these women had plenty of opportunities, it just makes you wonder why they never panned out. There is the small exception of women who decided to put their life on hold to fulfill their studying/careers, but unless this isn't obvious in the beginning, you're probably dealing with a chick who is a little crazy, and was never able to keep a man around who wanted to support her ass. Just my two cents.
 

Pandora

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 11, 2008
Messages
3,205
Reaction score
3,112
Age
38
What's equally as damaging is the influence her friends and family give. Have you ever heard of the statement "you are the sum of the 5 closest people you associate with"? I think this is entirely true in all aspects of life. If you really want to know someone.. look at the people they hang around, it should give you a pretty good idea.

Absolutely I agree. FYI if the women start telling you negative things their family thinks of you, get out right there. It's either a lie and a sign of negative triangulation, or its true and they just don't care about holding up pretenses and on top of that this type of woman is usually pretty easily influenced esp by family. While being distant from family/no friends is obviously a red flag I would say that being too influenced by family and friends can be just as negative.
I agree. I have found that crazy chicks have crazy moms that will find a reason not to like you. When i dated the BPD i met her mom. She ended up telling her daughter that i was a pervert that was checking her out ( the mom) lol. Family is a huge influence.
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,936
Reaction score
12,146
Location
DFW, TX
Yeah, I agree with this. I would say it looks a lot more fishy when a woman is 25-30, no kids, and never married than it does for a man in the same situation. You know these women had plenty of opportunities, it just makes you wonder why they never panned out. There is the small exception of women who decided to put their life on hold to fulfill their studying/careers, but unless this isn't obvious in the beginning, you're probably dealing with a chick who is a little crazy, and was never able to keep a man around who wanted to support her ass. Just my two cents.
Maybe she was "using" several men to support her a$$, why she never had a man...
 

Scars

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 20, 2007
Messages
2,158
Reaction score
1,019
Age
34
Location
Phoenix
I agree. I have found that crazy chicks have crazy moms that will find a reason not to like you. When i dated the BPD i met her mom. She ended up telling her daughter that i was a pervert that was checking her out lol. Family is a huge influence.
Maybe she was "using" several men to support her a$$, why she never had a man...
And "selling protein supplements" on Instagram.. :)
 

corrector

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 12, 2009
Messages
9,035
Reaction score
3,446
As bad as they are at this, they're even worse at maintaining relationships once they get one. They will endlessly attempt to undermine and destroy the relationship without investing in it and keeping a foot out the door at all times.
This sounds like my ex-wife. After about a month into the marriage and an expensive wedding she asked for a divorce. I remember doing most of the work and she was just giving me grief until the whole thing just atomized.
 

Serenity

Moderator
Joined
Aug 19, 2013
Messages
4,952
Reaction score
4,773
Age
32
Location
Eye of the storm
I don't think there's any significant difference being either male or female in the dating game. There's the sex card though, but the only reason that works is because a much larger portion of men than women are needy. Why it is so I don't really understand, but it does not help women in securing a good relationship anyways.

I've seen the struggles from several womens sides, they are indeed as clueless as most men. I don't think women plan on going into relationships that will end any more than guys do, it's not exactly fun for anyone to break up or divorce. They too make a ton of mistakes that ruins their chances with a guy.

It's easy to put all blame on oneself or the other, but observing these things impartially from the sidelines it becomes clear that failed couples share the blame. It takes two people doing it right to create a good, lasting and stable relationship. If one of them fails it will bring down everything, because the other person doesn't know how to properly resolve the situation and starts failing too.

I've had women trying to pick me up, while looking just fine they didn't appeal to me. They failed to attract me, but if they pushed the right buttons it would be different.

A couple of years ago a friend couple set me up with a date, she was cute but appeared really shy. I gave it a chance anyways, maybe some time would break the ice and make her comfortable. I kissed her and I fvcked her, but she was hard talking to. She just wouldn't relax and open up. My judgement was a bit weakened about her so I asked her for relationship, but it was definitely too soon. She said yes and appeared happy about it, but inside she was really insecure about it. That showed a few weeks later when I felt her drifting away, she was hard to reach and was always busy. When I realized I immediately confronted her with my suspicion, asking her if she liked me at all. Then she broke down in tears admitting to it, saying I deserve better than her. Like she had incredibly low self-esteem, that she felt unworthy of me to the point she wouldn't even try making it work. I tried calming her and turn her around, but she just couldn't do it so I accepted that. I knew she would regret it, this was a mistake on her part. From what I heard from my friends for months after this, she was still thinking about me and I just know that at some level she wanted me back. She never asked, I wouldn't have accepted it either. She fvcked up royally and wasted my time, wasn't going to allow her the chance of doing that again.

So yeah, many women too struggle with dating. They don't have such a hard time getting sex, but that's not what they value most and hope to gain through dating. They too can suffer from shyness and bad choices. I know many women who can't handle a relationship and ends up ruining it for themselves.
 

BeTheChange

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 28, 2015
Messages
1,467
Reaction score
1,139
I disagree with your definition of a female DJ. Any woman can get some stable beta herb to settle down and marry her.

A female DJ is someone with the looks, personality and finnesse to lock down an Alpha male who ALSO has the means to provide - the Harvey Specters of the world.
 

Roober

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 2, 2016
Messages
2,385
Reaction score
2,122
I don't think there's any significant difference being either male or female in the dating game. There's the sex card though, but the only reason that works is because a much larger portion of men than women are needy. Why it is so I don't really understand, but it does not help women in securing a good relationship anyways.

I've seen the struggles from several womens sides, they are indeed as clueless as most men. I don't think women plan on going into relationships that will end any more than guys do, it's not exactly fun for anyone to break up or divorce. They too make a ton of mistakes that ruins their chances with a guy.

It's easy to put all blame on oneself or the other, but observing these things impartially from the sidelines it becomes clear that failed couples share the blame. It takes two people doing it right to create a good, lasting and stable relationship. If one of them fails it will bring down everything, because the other person doesn't know how to properly resolve the situation and starts failing too.

I've had women trying to pick me up, while looking just fine they didn't appeal to me. They failed to attract me, but if they pushed the right buttons it would be different.

A couple of years ago a friend couple set me up with a date, she was cute but appeared really shy. I gave it a chance anyways, maybe some time would break the ice and make her comfortable. I kissed her and I fvcked her, but she was hard talking to. She just wouldn't relax and open up. My judgement was a bit weakened about her so I asked her for relationship, but it was definitely too soon. She said yes and appeared happy about it, but inside she was really insecure about it. That showed a few weeks later when I felt her drifting away, she was hard to reach and was always busy. When I realized I immediately confronted her with my suspicion, asking her if she liked me at all. Then she broke down in tears admitting to it, saying I deserve better than her. Like she had incredibly low self-esteem, that she felt unworthy of me to the point she wouldn't even try making it work. I tried calming her and turn her around, but she just couldn't do it so I accepted that. I knew she would regret it, this was a mistake on her part. From what I heard from my friends for months after this, she was still thinking about me and I just know that at some level she wanted me back. She never asked, I wouldn't have accepted it either. She fvcked up royally and wasted my time, wasn't going to allow her the chance of doing that again.

So yeah, many women too struggle with dating. They don't have such a hard time getting sex, but that's not what they value most and hope to gain through dating. They too can suffer from shyness and bad choices. I know many women who can't handle a relationship and ends up ruining it for themselves.
This really hit home with me with my ex. While I did have beta behaviors, our situation was almost identical, she started drifting, told me "I don't do anything for you" and "I don't know what you see in me" and things like that... I guess that is why she has the incessent snaps about "I am beautiful" and "I love me"... It was a really low self-esteem, which I had suspected...

She couldn't handle a relationship and ruined it...
 

Serenity

Moderator
Joined
Aug 19, 2013
Messages
4,952
Reaction score
4,773
Age
32
Location
Eye of the storm
This really hit home with me with my ex. While I did have beta behaviors, our situation was almost identical, she started drifting, told me "I don't do anything for you" and "I don't know what you see in me" and things like that... I guess that is why she has the incessent snaps about "I am beautiful" and "I love me"... It was a really low self-esteem, which I had suspected...

She couldn't handle a relationship and ruined it...
It was a really weird experience for me, but eventually I just thought "well, she's right though, I do deserve better".

She was the end of the line for any remnant of beta in me. I have been emotionally honest and very direct in my communication since.
 

AttackFormation

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2014
Messages
4,126
Reaction score
3,659
Age
31
Location
Sweden
If you are 25+ and you are not married and not in a serious relationship then the problem is you ( as a woman). Usually these women just don't get good dating advice. I used to have female friends that i would give dating advice to. I have a little sister in her early 20s. They all called me with the most retarded ideas about what they should be doing. The advice women get from dating magazines is "Be a challenge". Some advice says " dont text back too quickly". This is all ridiculous advice. Women are even clueless about what will keep a guy. This is why many put out quickly not realizing that they are shooting themselves in the foot.

We have this idea that women are socially more advanced than men when it comes to dating. This is absolutely false. They come off as more advanced because they have sexual bargaining power. This is their only trump card. Most post 25+ have no game. They are clueless. This is why they are single and cant figure out why. I feel sorry for them because many of them actually mean well. Its just that they dont know what works to keep a man. No one teaches them. They think that putting out quickly or not texting back or playing hard to get keeps a guy.

The women that get it right are the ones that are married. These woman have true "game". These women are functional reasonable humans and are married early. They usually come from small town America and married an average dude. They didnt play too many games. They got married in their very early twenties and moved on with their lives. Getting that wedding ring from a guy that is stable and wants to provide for you is the definition of a female Don Juan. What we are seeing now is girls that are left over. The AFC of women is what is left over. These are girls that cant spot, attract (non sexually) and keep a guy to save their life. I asked one of my female relatives that is very attractive and single why she passed up good guys. She said "because they are boring". Case closed. That is a female AFC. No game. So she wont reach her goal of wife and kids.

Now a caveat to this is ugly girls. They actually have it rough. This only applies to average to hot chicks.
Here's the causation you are looking for, which has two parts to it:

1) Feminism resents men. Women get their sense of direction from TV, movies, magazines, blogs, celebrities and their peers, and those sources will be feminist. But feminist advice will never be to do something that might create a positive experience for men to entice them to want to be with the woman, because they don't want to give men positive experiences.

2) Feminism admires and seeks to emulate a caricature of apex men, + the equality narrative. Promiscuity, status, "confidence", you name it - it's them emulating the traits they find attractive in apex men, while despising traditional notions of femininity. They then project that since they themselves are attracted to these things, men must be too. After all, they are told men and women are the same. This thinking men and women are the same is also why they think them being promiscuous is an achievement. For a man to get laid reliably it takes the traits of good looks, charm and accomplishment to different degrees, as well as active effort and the strength to handle rejection. But for women it takes no attractive traits and no effort or mental fortitude - all it takes is the decision to allow it. In fact, it takes more discipline for them to not do it than vice versa, especially with today's technology and libertine culture.

You end up with a combination of them being both clueless and resentful. Women do not get their advice from sources like this.
 
Last edited:

Pandora

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 11, 2008
Messages
3,205
Reaction score
3,112
Age
38
Here's the causation you are looking for, which has two parts to it:

1) Feminism resents men. Women get their sense of direction from TV, movies, magazines, blogs, celebrities and their peers, and those sources will be feminist. But feminist advice will never be to do something that might create a positive experience for men to entice them to want to be with the woman, because they don't want to give men positive experiences.

2) Feminism admires and seeks to emulate a caricature of apex men, + the equality narrative. Promiscuity, status, "confidence", you name it - it's them emulating the traits they find attractive in apex men, while despising traditional notions of femininity. They then project that since they themselves are attracted to these things, men must be too. After all, they are told men and women are the same.

You end up with a combination of them being both clueless and resentful. Women do not get their advice from sources like this.
This makes a lot of sense. Bro i didnt know that Suzanne Vencker had a blog! Thats amazing. I read her book the Flip Side of Feminism and I loved it. She gives me hope in women again lol
 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
15,859
Reaction score
8,562
The advice women get from dating magazines is "Be a challenge". Some advice says " dont text back too quickly".
Hmm, where have I heard that before? Sounds familiar.... I bet they hear "Be confident" a lot, too.
 

AttackFormation

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2014
Messages
4,126
Reaction score
3,659
Age
31
Location
Sweden
This makes a lot of sense. Bro i didnt know that Suzanne Vencker had a blog! Thats amazing. I read her book the Flip Side of Feminism and I loved it. She gives me hope in women again lol
It is hopeful, but also almost dispiriting to read her blog, because how many other women/channels do you see with this message? it's a microscopic niche. It makes you realize how low your odds are of finding a wife material woman, especially one who is not just pretending to be. It would almost be better to conclude that it's hopeless than to live in a purgatory.

Oh well lol, her stuff is on point. You gotta stay strong.
 

Bokanovsky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 7, 2012
Messages
4,635
Reaction score
4,193
The main problem for women in today's society is conflicting priorities. They have been brainwashed to believe that they must focus on education and career advancement opportunities in their 20's. Of course, their 20's also happen to be their prime years for attracting and retaining a "quality" man. You can't effectively pursue both of those objectives at the same time.

In addition, college is usually a ruinous experience for women in and of itself. While in college, they are exposed to degenerate lifestyles centred on partying, excessive drinking and drug use on the one hand, and intense feminist anti-male propaganda on the other. This is a highly toxic environment that many women emerge from emotionally scarred for life.
 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
15,859
Reaction score
8,562
Nah man women can get relationship easily, not just sex
I think that's true, although they have to be choosy about which type of man they pick. It looks like about 70% of the guys here have the attitude "Hell no, I will never get into a relationship with a woman, I just want a bunch of sex partners". I've always thought most men had the attitude that they enjoyed dating around, but if they met the right girl they had no problem with getting into a relationship. Now I wonder.

I wonder if modern pornography has anything to do this? One of the problems with porn is that it conditions men to be able to see 10 different naked women with a click of a mouse, so they can have trouble responding to a real woman. It feeds into men's natural appreciation for variety and multiplies it x 1000.
 
Top