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1000 approaches

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Sam_J

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Keep a solid record of your interactions, success vs failure rate, etc. Your perception might deceive you and hard data is always good to have when doing such studies.

Needless to say, yes, please report back.

Modern Man Advice
Ive been doing the same thing. 16 approaches so far, 3 gave snapchat but wouldn't add me back as a friend, 3 gave snap and did add me as a friend, 1 gave phone number, but only 1 of the 16 actually texted back to talk, and 0 have gone out with me. So 7 of 16 gave some type of contact info, 9 full rejections, but no real "successes" yet. Obviously 16 is a very low number though and I need to do a lot more. What are typical success rates?
 

Modern Man Advice

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Ive been doing the same thing. 16 approaches so far, 3 gave snapchat but wouldn't add me back as a friend, 3 gave snap and did add me as a friend, 1 gave phone number, but only 1 of the 16 actually texted back to talk, and 0 have gone out with me. So 7 of 16 gave some type of contact info, 9 full rejections, but no real "successes" yet. Obviously 16 is a very low number though and I need to do a lot more. What are typical success rates?
Success rates are subjective. How you view success is different than the next person. I say you having the cojones to cold approach and having a meaningful conversation (regardless of contact or no contact) is a success. That is much farther than most men that too intimated to cold approach.

Getting a contact is a very relative success as most women will give out their contact without a genuine intention to connect further.

However, getting the 1st date out of that cold approach is a sure success (regardless of 2nd or 3rd date). Because that means that whatever conversation you had was meaningful enough to intrigue her imagination and interest in making the effort to get to know you.

Now going back to how I started, just having the cojones to cold approach, perfecting your "game", building that confidence is a success within of itself.

The bottom line is that nowadays is so hard to connect with a stranger that we simply don't dare to have a conversation without having an agenda and that it is a numbers game. Just accumulate those numbers with the mentality that you are learning not that you are going to get laid. But that is just me.

Modern Man Advice
 

Sam_J

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Just generally speaking here...

Knock it off with the Snapchat, WhatsApp, and whatever other stupid apps for Millennials there are now.

And, you're 0 for 16. You say none went out with you.
okay fair enough, I"m 0 for 16. I disagree on the snapchat, as almost every girl 20-25 is on it and it's just another form of communication with extra features. Facebook and instagram on the other hand are stupid, timewasting apps that I'll never use.
 

Sam_J

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Success rates are subjective. How you view success is different than the next person. I say you having the cojones to cold approach and having a meaningful conversation (regardless of contact or no contact) is a success. That is much farther than most men that too intimated to cold approach.

Getting a contact is a very relative success as most women will give out their contact without a genuine intention to connect further.

However, getting the 1st date out of that cold approach is a sure success (regardless of 2nd or 3rd date). Because that means that whatever conversation you had was meaningful enough to intrigue her imagination and interest in making the effort to get to know you.

Now going back to how I started, just having the cojones to cold approach, perfecting your "game", building that confidence is a success within of itself.

The bottom line is that nowadays is so hard to connect with a stranger that we simply don't dare to have a conversation without having an agenda and that it is a numbers game. Just accumulate those numbers with the mentality that you are learning not that you are going to get laid. But that is just me.

Modern Man Advice
Thanks, I definitely need to work more on it for sure tho, still lots of anxiety and embarassment around approaching sometimes.
 

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Modern Man Advice

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Thanks, I definitely need to work more on it for sure tho, still lots of anxiety and embarassment around approaching sometimes.
It's normal. Even professional musicians get nervous before going on stage. It's what makes life exciting. But the anxiety will eventually go down and die off the more you do it.

The key is to remember that every human you see on the streets is just like you. Never put anyone (especially a girl) on a pedestal. They are not above you or below you. Forget their looks, their cars/house/etc, forget their attitude, they are normal human beings and you will always have something in common and something of value.

If it helps, make it a game. See every person as a surprise box, be excited about what is in that box. Because something in that box can add value to you as a human being and as a man. Make it a game to find out what that is.

Modern Man Advice
 

mikedee

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It's normal. Even professional musicians get nervous before going on stage. It's what makes life exciting. But the anxiety will eventually go down and die off the more you do it.

The key is to remember that every human you see on the streets is just like you. Never put anyone (especially a girl) on a pedestal. They are not above you or below you. Forget their looks, their cars/house/etc, forget their attitude, they are normal human beings and you will always have something in common and something of value.

If it helps, make it a game. See every person as a surprise box, be excited about what is in that box. Because something in that box can add value to you as a human being and as a man. Make it a game to find out what that is.

Modern Man Advice
AA never dies off, overcome approach anxiety is an ongoing process but yes it goes down the more you approach. Personnaly I like a bit AA, it makes the approach exciting,
 

Josh Davidson

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Approaches 1 & 2: Tonight I went to the bar by my house and approached two women; asking each of them if they were single. Neither one was. I would have asked them for their phone numbers if they were. They were the only two women in this small bar worth approaching. I also saw (and she saw me, but neither of us talked tonight, and I don't expect us to) the woman whose phone number I got on St. Patrick's Day, and when I tried to meet up with her she eventually texted "I'll let you know". (She just ignored me tonight; she was talking to a female friend of her's who looked [just] ok, but I assumed the woman who gave me the "I'll let you know" text would have sabotaged any attempts of mine to get with her friend.)
 
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corrector

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These women you approach. Are they on their smartphones? Do you think that's affecting your closing ratio, especially if they are plugged into dating apps and social media?
 

Josh Davidson

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These women you approach. Are they on their smartphones? Do you think that's affecting your closing ratio, especially if they are plugged into dating apps and social media?
The women were not on smartphones. I did 100 approaches once within a year and only got 1 phone number! I would have thought I would have gotten more since about 15 of them were single.
 

Mister_Skinny_Jeanz

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Social media is bullshiit. Phone numbers are the only acceptable form of communication.
idk bout that, i get the IG first , asking a random chick for her phone number works out rarely , she has to have an insane IL
 

SW15

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idk bout that, i get the IG first , asking a random chick for her phone number works out rarely , she has to have an insane IL
I've been asking for phone numbers for over 20 years. No issues at any point in time.

The women were not on smartphones. I did 100 approaches once within a year and only got 1 phone number! I would have thought I would have gotten more since about 15 of them were single.
If you're doing shiity, uncalibrated approaches, that can happen. Also possible if aiming high without demonstrating any value.
 

Mister_Skinny_Jeanz

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I've been asking for phone numbers for over 20 years. No issues at any point in time.



If you're doing shiity, uncalibrated approaches, that can happen. Also possible if aiming high without demonstrating any value.
it is what is, i get girls ig all the time , and then get the number , meeting one today she is texting me right now
 

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corrector

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The women were not on smartphones. I did 100 approaches once within a year and only got 1 phone number! I would have thought I would have gotten more since about 15 of them were single.
100 approaches in 1 year works out to roughly two approaches a week, unless you did it at one time at a huge gathering/social/party and you only went once in a year? Either way that doesn't sound like a high number of approaches, and I can see that its a low number.

If you approached 6 women per day in a year that would be 2, 190 approaches. If the first two approaches are warm-ups then you are really focusing on 2-3 quality approaches each day which would work out to hopefully 730 quality approaches and 730 daily warm-ups. Assuming you are on a learning curve and adapting then you should start seeing improved numbers.

Now the question, is can you generate a volume of that many women to approach (i.e. 4-6 women per day) using day-game without using too much of your time? Are you going to just be approaching hot women or any women? Are you wearing your best clothing and bringing on your A-game when you are doing these approaches? Watching a motivating youtube video of seeing other guys approach women? Are you going to fit it into your schedule so you have a consistent effort (ie block off 2 hours a day for approaches at XYZ location, etc....)? Would you have a journal so you can go over what you did, and what you could do better next time?

So I think there is allot of things you can do to improve your numbers. If I had the time to do this myself, I think it would be interesting to do something like that. If you have all this time and no tie-downs then you have the potential to have a great year with this.
 

Plinco

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Success rates are subjective. How you view success is different than the next person.
Had to get this off my chest. It is not subjective, it is objective because it is contextual.
 

Modern Man Advice

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Had to get this off my chest. It is not subjective, it is objective because it is contextual.
I can see why you are saying that and you are actually not wrong. However, what an accomplished man can pull will be different from what a not so accomplished man can pull. The former would consider getting her in bed success, the ladder simply getting the number success. The two subjects are simply on two different levels of accomplishment.

You can't simply deny someone new to the "game" having the courage to talk (IRL) to women of calling that a success. The same goes for so many different concepts, happiness, wealth, or even God. We all experience those things in a very intimate and personal manner. That is why I referred it as subjective.

But again, I 100% get what you are saying in the greater scheme of things.

Modern Man Advice
 
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