Dumped after 8 days

[DarwinTaurus]

Somebody contact Guinness, because surely this has got to be a world record...

I know fellow Don Juan's advocate 'No Contact' after a break up, well, my Ex and I broke up in May, not long after my Dad passed away, and after my Birthday. This was my first relationship in a VERY long time. Anyway, I went no contact, yet she ended up contacting me. We stayed in touch via text, and a few weeks ago, I had COVID. She brought me over a care package of groceries, which I thought was very thoughtful and sweet.

Wednesday week ago, she invited me over to her place for dinner, and she asked me to stay the night. Aside from briefly seeing her masked when she dropped off the care package, this was the first true time that we saw each other since the break-up. I told her that I still had feelings for her, and said I would like to try again, and was willing to take it slow (she is going through a divorce, has two kids, and is doing full-time study, on top of working full-time. She has a lot on her plate). We were going to give it a go.

8 days later, I get the dreaded break-up... TEXT! That is how she broke up with me the first time, via text, which I believe is bloody weak as hell.

I feel like an absolute fool. What happened a week or so ago? A booty call? I'm starting to think she has mental health issues.

 

[Bigpapa]

I feel like an absolute fool. What happened a week or so ago? A booty call? I'm starting to think she has mental health issues.

most likely she found another dude , as you were not a challenge anymore ( she knew that she had you as you were the one who wanted a relationship )

 

[Scars]

You were just a side piece and used for validation. More than likely she already has higher interest in another dude. Maybe he wasn't showing her enough attention or was being "aloof", so she felt vulnerable and used you to make herself feel validated. Dude probably came around again, so you got dumped.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Somebody contact Guinness, because surely this has got to be a world record...

I know fellow Don Juan's advocate 'No Contact' after a break up, well, my Ex and I broke up in May, not long after my Dad passed away, and after my Birthday. This was my first relationship in a VERY long time. Anyway, I went no contact, yet she ended up contacting me. We stayed in touch via text, and a few weeks ago, I had COVID. She brought me over a care package of groceries, which I thought was very thoughtful and sweet.

Wednesday week ago, she invited me over to her place for dinner, and she asked me to stay the night. Aside from briefly seeing her masked when she dropped off the care package, this was the first true time that we saw each other since the break-up. I told her that I still had feelings for her, and said I would like to try again, and was willing to take it slow (she is going through a divorce, has two kids, and is doing full-time study, on top of working full-time. She has a lot on her plate). We were going to give it a go.

8 days later, I get the dreaded break-up... TEXT! That is how she broke up with me the first time, via text, which I believe is bloody weak as hell.

I feel like an absolute fool. What happened a week or so ago? A booty call? I'm starting to think she has mental health issues.

Bro...she wanted sex not some heavy relationship talk. The funny thing is that the best way to get back into a relationship with an ex is by NOT trying to be in a relationship with them and just banging them and having fun with them. It ha to be THEIR idea that they want to get back with you. Any version of you trying to get back with them after they dump you is not going to work and will end up exactly with what happened here.

You made things too serious and she wanted them to be carefree.

What happened was that you are no challenge to her and she realized that things were just going to be the same as before. You are too available for her and she knows she already has you. She knows she can treat you like crap and you'll still come crawling back to her. Not attractive.

 

[DarwinTaurus]

most likely she found another dude , as you were not a challenge anymore ( she knew that she had you as you were the one who wanted a relationship )

That would be the natural response, but I'm only the third person she has been with... a lesbian relationship when she was young, then a 17 year relationship (15 years of marriage) with her soon to be former husband, and me.

 

[DarwinTaurus]

Big mistake. What happened was she lost respect once you spilled your feels and expressed interest in "trying again."

Thanks for your thoughts. I guess my problem is that I wear my heart on my sleeve. This definitely is a lesson learned. I'm in my mid 40's, and I'm still making rookie mistakes...

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Big mistake. What happened was she lost respect once you spilled your feels and expressed interest in "trying again."

That's why you never go back to an ex and I'm a woman saying this!

She probably did miss you and thought about trying again, but once you actually began pushing for it by telling her you still had feelings and wanted to try again, she switched and lost respect. It's an automatic response.

All you can do is learn from this and vow to never get back with an ex again.

She's an ex a reason, never forget that.

Women should do the same thing with men.. I've never gone back to an ex even at my loneliest point.

Cherish the memories and move the hell on.

Sorry.

.

Yes...exactly what I said above pretty much...if he wanted to get back together, the way to do it was to NOT try to get back together, keep things loose and fun, bang her and let it be her to push to get back together and even then, put up some resistance and make her chase for a little bit before giving in.

 

[DarwinTaurus]

Yes...exactly what I said above pretty much...if he wanted to get back together, the way to do it was to NOT try to get back together, keep things loose and fun, bang her and let it be her to push to get back together and even then, put up some resistance and make her chase for a little bit before giving in.

The funny thing is, after our first break-up, I said to friends that if we did get back together, she had to be the one that asked. I don't know why I let myself down.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

Somebody contact Guinness, because surely this has got to be a world record...

I know fellow Don Juan's advocate 'No Contact' after a break up, well, my Ex and I broke up in May, not long after my Dad passed away, and after my Birthday. This was my first relationship in a VERY long time. Anyway, I went no contact, yet she ended up contacting me. We stayed in touch via text, and a few weeks ago, I had COVID. She brought me over a care package of groceries, which I thought was very thoughtful and sweet.

Wednesday week ago, she invited me over to her place for dinner, and she asked me to stay the night. Aside from briefly seeing her masked when she dropped off the care package, this was the first true time that we saw each other since the break-up. I told her that I still had feelings for her, and said I would like to try again, and was willing to take it slow (she is going through a divorce, has two kids, and is doing full-time study, on top of working full-time. She has a lot on her plate). We were going to give it a go.

8 days later, I get the dreaded break-up... TEXT! That is how she broke up with me the first time, via text, which I believe is bloody weak as hell.

I feel like an absolute fool. What happened a week or so ago? A booty call? I'm starting to think she has mental health issues.

Don't mind what happened a week ago and what was going through her head. That is irrelevant and useless.

Mind your actions, and you not only broke NC but gave in and worse pushed to get back together. All are no no's. Next time, stay firm with NC. If she texts, respond with yes and no answers or simply ignore it. Up to you. If you end up in a situation where you see an ex, do not let her know how you feel. Let her wonder what is going through your head. And God-man, she broke up with you. Move on.


Modern Man Advice

 

[BackInTheGame78]

The funny thing is, after our first break-up, I said to friends that if we did get back together, she had to be the one that asked. I don't know why I let myself down.

Sometimes it's hard to stick to it when you are in the moment. Just keep your head up and remember that for next time. Making mistakes is human...making the same ones over and over again tho means you haven't learned from the first time.

 

[manfrombelow]

I told her that I still had feelings for her, and said I would like to try again, and was willing to take it slow (she is going through a divorce, has two kids, and is doing full-time study, on top of working full-time. She has a lot on her plate).

WHAT THE FUCCK?

1. In such a situation, you don't talk, but you fucck the hell outta her.

2. So you came to her while she's still in a marital relationship with another guy? So she's been having the BEST OF BOTH WORLDS until she kicked your sorry azz?

I am speechless at this point. SMH.

 

[DarwinTaurus]

WHAT THE FUCCK?

1. In such a situation, you don't talk, but you fucck the hell outta her.

2. So you came to her while she's still in a marital relationship with another guy? So she's been having the BEST OF BOTH WORLDS until she kicked your sorry azz?

I am speechless at this point. SMH.

They are going through a divorce, which I believe is actually finalized this month. Her soon to be ex-Husband has already started a relationship with someone else.

 

[manfrombelow]

Big mistake. What happened was she lost respect once you spilled your feels and expressed interest in "trying again."

That's why you never go back to an ex and I'm a woman saying this!

She probably did miss you and thought about trying again, but once you actually began pushing for it by telling her you still had feelings and wanted to try again, she switched and lost respect. It's an automatic response.

Just venting.

Even though I understand this 100% as how women function from a biological/instinctual/unconscious perspective, I still shake my head in disgust at how irrational and crazy women act. It's almost like a curse, the most fvcked-up one.

 

[manfrombelow]

They are going through a divorce, which I believe is actually finalized this month. Her soon to be ex-Husband has already started a relationship with someone else.

That's none of your fvcking business mate. You came to her while she's still "stuck" (or whatever you name it) in her relationship. So she was having the best of both worlds: She sneaked out to suck your d~ck in the morning and came home to make dinner for her children and husband (and perhaps still happily suck her his d~ck too) in the evening.

Why do I know this? Because I was exactly in your shoes. I came to this broad truly thinking she's a "damsel in distress" (HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA) that needed to be "rescued" from her "unhappy marriage" (HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA) but it turned out she kicked me eventually due to me being too needy and clingy, and guess what? She's still with her husband.

 

[DarwinTaurus]

They don't live together, and her soon to be Ex, is living with his new partner.

 

[Sgthaytham]

Big mistake. What happened was she lost respect once you spilled your feels and expressed interest in "trying again."

That's why you never go back to an ex and I'm a woman saying this!

She probably did miss you and thought about trying again, but once you actually began pushing for it by telling her you still had feelings and wanted to try again, she switched and lost respect. It's an automatic response.

All you can do is learn from this and vow to never get back with an ex again.

She's an ex a reason, never forget that.

Women should do the same thing with men.. I've never gone back to an ex even at my loneliest point.

Cherish the memories and move the hell on.

Sorry.

.

This.

As soon as she felt like you were trying to clamp her down (which by all pretences, you were) she bailed.

There might be another guy, there might not, but you blew up any chance by showing weakness, insecurity and neediness.

This is assuming she broke up with you the first time.

 

[jaygreenb]

Somebody contact Guinness, because surely this has got to be a world record...

I know fellow Don Juan's advocate 'No Contact' after a break up, well, my Ex and I broke up in May, not long after my Dad passed away, and after my Birthday. This was my first relationship in a VERY long time. Anyway, I went no contact, yet she ended up contacting me. We stayed in touch via text, and a few weeks ago, I had COVID. She brought me over a care package of groceries, which I thought was very thoughtful and sweet.

Wednesday week ago, she invited me over to her place for dinner, and she asked me to stay the night. Aside from briefly seeing her masked when she dropped off the care package, this was the first true time that we saw each other since the break-up. I told her that I still had feelings for her, and said I would like to try again, and was willing to take it slow (she is going through a divorce, has two kids, and is doing full-time study, on top of working full-time. She has a lot on her plate). We were going to give it a go.

8 days later, I get the dreaded break-up... TEXT! That is how she broke up with me the first time, via text, which I believe is bloody weak as hell.

I feel like an absolute fool. What happened a week or so ago? A booty call? I'm starting to think she has mental health issues.

You only want to keep a woman in your life who is trying very hard to keep you there, it will save you a lot of headaches in the long term. Especially if she ended it prior, she has to work very hard to get you back otherwise the same situation will result. In general it is not good to take a woman back who has left you before, rarely works. Easier said than done sometime when emotions are involved but you really have to work on your emotional discipline. If a woman isn't chasing after you her interest is most likely not high enough to retain her long term anyway.