Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Urgently need input from our experienced DJs

EyeBRollin

Master Don Juan
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Maybe not
you’ve come to the right place my guy. Regarding the OP, hang around here some more and familiarize yourself with the DJ Bible and other game literature.

You come to find that thou shall not comfort any woman that rejects us. In fact, hang around long enough you’ll actually grow to believe it’s her loss and that she’s the loser for rejecting you.
 

darksprezzatura

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Hey guys,I need your input as I have been feeling confused and sad for quite some time.
About me- I am tall and good looking,but due to my open personality I make a lot of enemies. I am 22 year old and in first year of a five year long course.The year is about to end.
The story- During the first four months I got a propose from arguably the hottest girl of our class,and even though I was unhappy with my life(don't know why) I started dating her and got into a relationship pretty quickly.We both were each others first everything,lost virginities to each other and so on.
The problem-After the first month of our relationship I started having anxiety because of her as I felt I wasn't her priority and she may cheat on me.Also,her male best friends who are pretty popular are my sworn enemies so I had doubts that maybe she could be like them.So ,to deal with these emotions I told her I wanted a break to which she said she wants a break up.So I tried beta things by saying her to give me a chance and which she arrogantly dismissed many times.She also got pretty ill during this time,which I think was due to break up. So after a week I called her to an isolated place and said I want to be back,which she shot down,so I said all the best of luck with a smile and left,and that evening she said she wants to be back!! And we got back and the lockdown started.
During lockdown we had a fight and again broke up and I unfollowed her from all social media.
So now the classes have again started and it has been difficult for me. She also looks like she isn't doing well too. And lately her male friends have filled her head with vile things about me. I have been acting totally normal Infront of her.


So,I wanted to know what should I do now?
Also,keep in mind there are very few dating options around me.
Whatever you're feeling is totally normal.

Many of us have slept with dozens of women and went through a similar phase when we were starting out - guilt, insecurity, anger, jealousy.

Meditate to calm your mind.

Realise that these turbulent emotions won't last.

Workout to release happy hormones.

Talk to new people, males and females.

Get involved in a new hobby.

You're a student, make the most of your course.

This isn't a big deal, things will fall in place, give things time.

You're well on your way to be a player elite.

There are lots of women out there, better than her, who would love meeting you, give them a chance.
 

Theoneaboveall

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you’ve come to the right place my guy. Regarding the OP, hang around here some more and familiarize yourself with the DJ Bible and other game literature.

You come to find that thou shall not comfort any woman that rejects us. In fact, hang around long enough you’ll actually grow to believe it’s her loss and that she’s the loser for rejecting you.
Thanks man. The thing is I have read DJ Bible and other literature many times,but what I have realized now is that when **** hits the fan,only thing that helps is experience. My exams are in a week,but I haven't been able to focus at all. Let's hope it changes.
 
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Theoneaboveall

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Whatever you're feeling is totally normal.

Many of us have slept with dozens of women and went through a similar phase when we were starting out - guilt, insecurity, anger, jealousy.

Meditate to calm your mind.

Realise that these turbulent emotions won't last.

Workout to release happy hormones.

Talk to new people, males and females.

Get involved in a new hobby.

You're a student, make the most of your course.

This isn't a big deal, things will fall in place, give things time.

You're well on your way to be a player elite.

There are lots of women out there, better than her, who would love meeting you, give them a chance.
That's a great reply,surely will implement these.
 

deadmasterx

Senior Don Juan
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The problem-After the first month of our relationship I started having anxiety because of her as I felt I wasn't her priority and she may cheat on me.Also,her male best friends who are pretty popular are my sworn enemies so I had doubts that maybe she could be like them.So ,to deal with these emotions I told her I wanted a break to which she said she wants a break up.
It was a smart choice. You need to develop your emotional side more before you can be finally able to date someone and get in a serious relationship.

About the fear of being cheated, I think that most guys think about that, but some comes from a place of insecurity, others think of it as a possibility. What I want to say with that is that the lower your self confidence is, the more afraid of getting cheated, dumped and treated badly you'll be, which increases the chances on you acting needy and clingy, acting as a pleaser because you don't want these things to happen.

Keep in your mind that a girl will cheat for 2 reasons: if she doesn't respect you and because she is naturally a cheater. Opportunity makes the thief, so it's always important that you have a good self confidence in the relationship, don't put her on a pedestal, keep your authority leading the relationship.

If you be able to get the mindset that if your girl is with you it's because she wants to be with you, she likes and loves you, then you'll be way more relieved. Don't force things, you don't want people in your life that are not enthusiastic and excited to be with you.

So now the classes have again started and it has been difficult for me. She also looks like she isn't doing well too. And lately her male friends have filled her head with vile things about me. I have been acting totally normal Infront of her.
There's always the crows, flying around a rotten relationship just waiting for it to be over and eat the leftovers. She's a girl, so all her friends are gonna be provinding her emotional support. It means that you, from now on, will be the ultimate villain in her friends' mouth. Crazy, right?

Actually, there ain't much you can do about that. You got together, acted weak, broke up, then got together again and broke up again... the whole thing is so messed up in many many ways.

Even if you want her back, don't fall for the illusion of action. Just back off, work on this emotional side of yours, learn to deal better with things. If she likes you, she'll reach out, no matter what her friends tell her. If she does, you invite her out for a date, sparkle the good feelings back, have fun, keep on doing it until you get her back. She'll be testing you hard, so get ready for it. You broke her heart, she'll want revenge, and if you want it to be open for you again, you better pass her tests.
 

MatureDJ

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You need to spin more plates; that solves all the problems ... unless you're sub-Chad-tier and can't get decent plates. :mad:
 

john1234

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Thank you so much guys for your output.But I feel guilty that I took her virginity and am now being like a stranger to her.So,has this happened to anyone and how did you deal with it?
How do you know this? If you genuinely took her virginity you must have screwed up pretty bad for her not to want you.

I reckon you need to work on yourself as there are many more girls out there for you. Keep many plates spinning. That's what I do now, I can't tolerate poor behaviour and will just move to another plate once they start playing up!
 

BackInTheGame78

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Thanks man. The thing is I have read DJ Bible and other literature many times,but what I have realized now is that when **** hits the fan,only thing that helps is experience. My exams are in a week,but I haven't been able to focus at all. Let's hope it changes.
Yes...there is a huge difference between knowing something you read and actually using this knowledge in practice in your own life. That comes via experience and actually using it.

Know that even when using it you will likely fail for a while until you understand all the nuances and when and how to use it properly in various situations. These are learning experiences on the path to success and should be valued because they will be your best teachers.
 

Theoneaboveall

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How do you know this? If you genuinely took her virginity you must have screwed up pretty bad for her not to want you.

I reckon you need to work on yourself as there are many more girls out there for you. Keep many plates spinning. That's what I do now, I can't tolerate poor behaviour and will just move to another plate once they start playing up!
I had unfollowed her from insta after break up seven months age and sent her a follow request just two days ago.She ignored my request.
 

Theoneaboveall

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Yes...there is a huge difference between knowing something you read and actually using this knowledge in practice in your own life. That comes via experience and actually using it.

Know that even when using it you will likely fail for a while until you understand all the nuances and when and how to use it properly in various situations. These are learning experiences on the path to success and should be valued because they will be your best teachers.
How does one develop their emotional side. I have been feeling emotionally weak for quite some time.
 

john1234

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I had unfollowed her from insta after break up seven months age and sent her a follow request just two days ago.She ignored my request.
Ignore her as well and withdraw your Instagram request.

You said you'r tall and handsome, women don't always fall for that bollocks , you have got a lot to learn. You need to spin plates and work on yourself.
Keep your chin up. You need to get laid and her memory will fade fast.
 

Theoneaboveall

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Saw her in the class today. Some other guy is trying to get her.She didn't seem too well herself.My heart is aching now. Man,this s#it sucks.
 

Roober

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A man whose life is centered on principles will always glide swiftly through life over a man who is centered on people, relationships, money, jobs, religion,or any other sources.

Find your principles, and the other components of your life (relationships, family, work, etc.) will be an accessory of your life,not the focus of it.
 

samspade

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Saw her in the class today. Some other guy is trying to get her.She didn't seem too well herself.My heart is aching now. Man,this s#it sucks.
Let him have her. You two had your time together. There's a season for everything.

Don't feel guilty about "taking" her virginity. She took yours. You're even. Put all that history behind you for now. In time, you'll focus more on the good.

Try meditation to develop your emotional side. It helps you recognize the emotions as they pass through you, but then teaches you to dismiss them as the simple things they are. You don't fight them, but you don't dwell on them.

Failing that, I dunno, smoke a J and watch "Airplane."
 

Modern Man Advice

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Hey guys,I need your input as I have been feeling confused and sad for quite some time.
About me- I am tall and good looking,but due to my open personality I make a lot of enemies. I am 22 year old and in first year of a five year long course.The year is about to end.
The story- During the first four months I got a propose from arguably the hottest girl of our class,and even though I was unhappy with my life(don't know why) I started dating her and got into a relationship pretty quickly.We both were each others first everything,lost virginities to each other and so on.
The problem-After the first month of our relationship I started having anxiety because of her as I felt I wasn't her priority and she may cheat on me.Also,her male best friends who are pretty popular are my sworn enemies so I had doubts that maybe she could be like them.So ,to deal with these emotions I told her I wanted a break to which she said she wants a break up.So I tried beta things by saying her to give me a chance and which she arrogantly dismissed many times.She also got pretty ill during this time,which I think was due to break up. So after a week I called her to an isolated place and said I want to be back,which she shot down,so I said all the best of luck with a smile and left,and that evening she said she wants to be back!! And we got back and the lockdown started.
During lockdown we had a fight and again broke up and I unfollowed her from all social media.
So now the classes have again started and it has been difficult for me. She also looks like she isn't doing well too. And lately her male friends have filled her head with vile things about me. I have been acting totally normal Infront of her.


So,I wanted to know what should I do now?
Also,keep in mind there are very few dating options around me.
Hello young man,

First off, proud of you for reaching out to the community. Men (and humans) are stronger united. We are here to back each other up. Some of us are 5 to 10 years ahead of others, and it is our duty to walk in life with you and hope you see some positive masculinity so that you can carry our torch even higher and farther. Don't ever forget that.

Secondly, what you need is to stay away from her. Resist every urge to contact her. Break all contact. This will require an immense amount of will but it WILL get easier as each day goes by. We promise it will. One day you will look back and laugh at the situation. Just whatever you do, don't let this go to waste. Learn from this.

Lastly, it is completely normal to feel this way. Especially since she was your first, and since it sounds like dating is bleak where you live you seem to lack abundance. So in that instance, create abundance from within first. That is what you need. What hobbies do you currently have? What does your social life look like? What projects are you working on? Do you have a vision for your life long-term? We need to empathetically challenge your view of the world internally and externally. More importantly, who are your major influences in your life (friends, family, mentors, positive examples, etc)?

These are the kind of questions (among many, many, many others) you need to ask yourself and tackle one by one. Now, do not see this as a chore but rather as an exciting challenge.

Our suggestion, create an abundant mindset. Build a kingdom within. Women (especially the wrong women) will be a distraction at your age. You should use your youth as an advantage to build an amazing life. You haven't experienced life fully, not even scratched the surface of what life (hobbies, passions, projects, ideas, visions, helping others, travel, etc, etc, etc) has to offer.

If you have any questions, please do reach out to us at any time.

Cheers,
Modern Man Advice
 

Theoneaboveall

Don Juan
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So,we both are head our our batch,and instead of doing things with me she does things with her male friends and acts really rude to me,what does it mean? She hasn't moved on or something else?
 
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