Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Keeping excitement in LTR

BJP1991

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 11, 2018
Messages
474
Reaction score
212
Age
32
If in an LTR (6+months, etc.), living together or just seeing one another a few times weekly, what are some ways to keep the excitement and “spark” alive?

Moreso, if you start to sense a fade in excitement, whether within yourself or your partner, what strategies can you use to keep it fresh and lively? I get sticking to purpose, working out, having your own friends and hobbies, but what about directly between you and your lady?
 

flowtheory

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 18, 2018
Messages
1,688
Reaction score
1,416
Age
35
Location
So Cal
The only advice: keep YOUR life rich and interesting to YOU. Keep your life passionate by your own standards and everything will follow. when you’re interested in your life, she will be interested in what you’re doing, and this opens the door for you to invite her in to your world which communicates exploration for her through your eyes.

When you try to spice things up with a long term girlfriend and you don’t have anything going on, it is quickly fleeting and you will both feel an emptiness which is a bit more abstract as it’s a feeling. Because this will communicate that you’re making her or the relationship your number 1.
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,936
Reaction score
12,147
Location
DFW, TX
If in an LTR (6+months, etc.), living together or just seeing one another a few times weekly, what are some ways to keep the excitement and “spark” alive?

Moreso, if you start to sense a fade in excitement, whether within yourself or your partner, what strategies can you use to keep it fresh and lively? I get sticking to purpose, working out, having your own friends and hobbies, but what about directly between you and your lady?
I think a man can keep it HOT. Theres a super long list, but I have a short list.

1. A trip or mini adventure at least once a month
2. special "date" night a few times a month. Make them surprises, I know it gets knocked, but part of this game is making memories
3. Stay on your purpose so your not up under her
4. Grooming, fitness, dress game on point and maintained
5. Activities a life of your own
6. Enough sex to keep her filled with you but not too much. In my opinion at least 3 days a week of hitting it.
7. Don't ever be stupid or manipulated by the sex, because you will lose your appeal
8. Self respect keep it, attraction depends on respect
9. We can't give too much, that's what sent alot of men here. Make sure she's giving and helping at least as much as you and possibly a little more.
 

flowtheory

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 18, 2018
Messages
1,688
Reaction score
1,416
Age
35
Location
So Cal
This will be an interesting thread.

There is a huge difference in this question between living together and seeing eachother sporadically
I think the main point of focusing on the self applies to both.

seeing each other sporadically allows one to maintain mystery because the space offers this inherently, which creates natural excitement to a certain degree. But how one shows up to the interactions conquers all; presence.
Living together unveils what it is you truly do with your time so it’s extremely hard to fake being interesting.

So one can fake purpose and being busy whilst living separately, but when things progress all will be un-masked.

dates and trips are merely surface and shallow. Things to do for entertainment. Inner game and your driving purpose is the real juice of attraction and what builds that spark. That PRESENCE everyone craves. That is the spark, the embers and the flame. Because what your asking is “how do I keep her feelings for me alive so we both feel for one another?” But the question should really be :”how do I keep my fire roaring for my life?” Your focus is already on the woman and the relationship. Redirect it.

the difference is being able to wear a suit and owning the suit like it’s your skin. And women are built to have a sense who owns the suit like skin.
 

flowtheory

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 18, 2018
Messages
1,688
Reaction score
1,416
Age
35
Location
So Cal
I think a man can keep it HOT. Theres a super long list, but I have a short list.

1. A trip or mini adventure at least once a month
2. special "date" night a few times a month. Make them surprises, I know it gets knocked, but part of this game is making memories
3. Stay on your purpose so your not up under her
4. Grooming, fitness, dress game on point and maintained
5. Activities a life of your own
6. Enough sex to keep her filled with you but not too much. In my opinion at least 3 days a week of hitting it.
7. Don't ever be stupid or manipulated by the sex, because you will lose your appeal
8. Self respect keep it, attraction depends on respect
9. We can't give too much, that's what sent alot of men here. Make sure she's giving and helping at least as much as you and possibly a little more.
Good list, but do you actually think this is possible to maintain? Sounds like a perfect life. Too perfect
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,936
Reaction score
12,147
Location
DFW, TX
Good list, but do you actually think this is possible to maintain? Sounds like a perfect life. Too perfect
Its not that much work. Half of that list is doing things for yourself that you should do as a man. The things with her, just account for making memories without doing too much.
 
Top