"Game" - defined

[Dash Riprock]

As a kid, everyone knew a guy who was a really good fighter growing up. Maybe not a bully, but you've seen him take guys much larger down and pound them. He had that certain "something." He just knew instinctively how to throw punches, counter, wrestle, etc. He was a "natural."

It's the same thing with women.

There are a few who are "naturals" with women. Maybe 1-3 % of all guys.

The rest of us have latent talent, some more than others, but we need to learn, practice, and develop. We learn what attracts females and what repels them. So "fight after fight" (date after date) you learn to become a better "fighter" (man and DJ). You started with some general talent and but practiced and learned and got better. It's NOT phony, or plastic pick-up lines, or other BS. You've tapped into 10,000+ years of generic coding on what women are attracted to in a man and you've accentuated those attributes in yourself.

You have your style, just like a boxer. Ali, Foreman, Norton, Holmes, Tyson, Holyfield--all had much different styles of boxing. All were heavyweight champions.

"Game" is you tapping into the knowledge needed to attract and keep women you desire. It's takes constant practice, just like boxing does. You keep getting better and better until, one day, you have you shot at the title--a woman you truly desire. You use your keenly developed attributes and knowledge and you don't let your (beta) guard down. You fight a good fight, you'll win the girl. Then you need to keep training (learning and applying) to keep her. You get sloppy, don't train, let your beta guard down, and someone else better will come along and take your "title."

Hope that helps.

~Dash~

Last edited: A moment ago

 

[Seattle4Life]

I think it's flawed thinking to think that there's any girl who is that special.

 

[GrowingPains]

I think it's flawed thinking to think that there's any girl who is that special.

Dash didn't say that you should think of a woman as special. He said you go into the field, try things out, adjust, try again and one day you will have honed your skill to a point where you can attain a woman that you desire. A woman that meets and perhaps even exceeds your standards.

Seattle, I think you're misunderstanding the point you're trying to be right about. Sure, you shouldn't think of a woman as the most special thing ever especially when you first meet her (she hasn't done anything to earn that) and she should never be the focus of your life. But it is possible for someone to be special to you - you're a human after all, not a Red Pill robot. Humans have feelings.

 

[zekko]

I agree with Dash. I remember when I was in my early dating years. There were no seduction websites, and this was long before the pickup community started. IIRC, Dash is an older gentlemn as well.

Every weekend we would party or go try to pick up girls. At other times I would have a girlfriend. But the point is we were constantly learning from experience. What worked, what didn't, what looked needy, what looked too callous, what moving too quick was, what moving too slow was, how different kinds of girls responded. It was a constant state of calibrating.

Even with no pickup sites, you couldn't help but learn.

 

[Dash Riprock]

I agree with Dash. I remember when I was in my early dating years. There were no seduction websites, and this was long before the pickup community started. IIRC, Dash is an older gentlemn as well.

Every weekend we would party or go try to pick up girls. At other times I would have a girlfriend. But the point is we were constantly learning from experience. What worked, what didn't, what looked needy, what looked too callous, what moving too quick was, what moving too slow was, how different kinds of girls responded. It was a constant state of calibrating.

Even with no pickup sites, you couldn't help but learn.

Great post, Zekko. Yes, all the pick-up internet info came about when I was in my 30's so I / we had many years of leaning by example and trial by fire.

A few things that come to mind my buddies and I would all agree on (80's -90's) way before the proliferation or internet dating sites or publication of dating/PUA material (notice the common denominators):

- Women had huge interest in guys who were "taken" - in marriage or just a gf
- The women we hardly cared about, but casually dated or f*ucked, would throw themselves in front of a train for us, but the ones we were really into usually dumped us at some point
- C*ocky and funny was always highly effective
- Women lost interest fast in Mr. Nice Guy, but they loved Mr. A-Hole
- (this one x100) Women had HUGE interest in guys they had to WORK for (now it's commonly called Challenge)
-"Chasing" never worked
- Women loved the forbidden fruit; you making out/screwing with your gf's best friend
- BIGGEST DIFFERENCE THEN VS NOW: To the strong, assertive, and confident went the riches. You want to screw or date a girl, you physically went up to her and asked her out whether you knew her or not. Remember, there were no dating sites. So, the quiet, introverted types never had a date and toiled in loneliness UNLESS they (gulp) showed some balls and went for it.
- I just seem to remember a lot more bar (fist) fights back then, many times over a woman. I took part in more than a few of these.

So much different now.

 

[zekko]

A few things that come to mind my buddies and I would all agree on (80's -90's) way before the proliferation or internet dating sites or publication of dating/PUA material (notice the common denominators):

- Women had huge interest in guys who were "taken" - in marriage or just a gf

The whole bit with women liking married guys had been a cliche forever. Seinfeld demonstrated it with George Costanza wearing a wedding ring. That was in 1991, but the idea had been around for as long as I remember. It far predates the internet, as do most of the PUA ideas. When I first started reading seduction material, I recognized most of the concepts from when I was younger. They either came up in conversation, or were common sayings: "Nice guys finish last", for instance.

I guess the main difference then was boys were still being raised to be men for the most part. I also remember there being more fist fights taking place back then. I don't consider myself a violent person at all, but I got involved in my share as well. But maybe they acted as necessary safety valves for the testosterone. Because we didn't have the school shootings or the random mass shootings like they do now.

Also, I was quiet and introverted (even shy at the time, but I was working on it), but if I wanted a girl, I would grab my sack and ask her. That's just what you did back then, and you didn't have to read Pook to tell you do it.

 

[Serenity]

I agree with Dash. I remember when I was in my early dating years. There were no seduction websites, and this was long before the pickup community started. IIRC, Dash is an older gentlemn as well.

Every weekend we would party or go try to pick up girls. At other times I would have a girlfriend. But the point is we were constantly learning from experience. What worked, what didn't, what looked needy, what looked too callous, what moving too quick was, what moving too slow was, how different kinds of girls responded. It was a constant state of calibrating.

Even with no pickup sites, you couldn't help but learn.

I'd probably do fine without this site, but having it sure made the process a lot faster. I think the level of determination is more important than the availability of answers. I went out and did the same as you, even though I was on this forum. It works, it just works. The words we use here to "explain" things to the newcomers are abstract, they don't really know what we're trying to say. They need experience to know, yet I find too many guys are trying to play it safe by learning the theory. That just doesn't work, even if websites like this exists there's no way around having to go through the experiences.

I'm a lot younger than you, but I get it. Reading on the internet can't substitute real world experience, just speed up the process.

 

[zekko]

I'm a lot younger than you, but I get it. Reading on the internet can't substitute real world experience, just speed up the process.

Oh yeah, don't get me wrong. I would have loved to have had this material when I was around 18-22. As opposed to having to learn my own way by trial and error. I almost wonder if I would have had the maturity to understand some of it at the time though, without having learned the lessons first hand.

 

[Serenity]

Oh yeah, don't get me wrong. I would have loved to have had this material when I was around 18-22. As opposed to having to learn my own way by trial and error. I almost wonder if I would have had the maturity to understand some of it at the time though, without having learned the lessons first hand.

That's my point, having it doesn't help that much without the experience. Going out there to challenge it or follow it is still necessary to internalize it. I discovered this material when I was 21, can't say it's a quick and easy fix. Without any prior experience the knowledge only served as pointers at best, still had no clue how to execute it but I tried. Sometimes it failed and sometimes it succeeded, I think the most important part was trying. It was still trial and error, just slightly more guided. Sometimes I wish I didn't know, it's too easy to stay reading instead of just throwing oneself into it and start collecting that sweet experience.

I didn't have the maturity to understand it, I challenged a lot of it. I'm glad I did because not everything spoken on this forum and places like it is entirely true, but some things are and I had to prove it to myself. I'm not sure you can understand most of it at all without experiences to relate it to, regardless of maturity.

My point was that being told a lot of this stuff only makes it faster to learn, it doesn't let you skip trial and error. The way you learned game is the right way, with or without internet resources.

 

[Mike32ct]

To some extent, the PUA materials have given guys “permission” to go out to talk to chicks. For some, that’s all they needed. The actual methods or techniques don’t matter much.

 

[zekko]

I didn't have the maturity to understand it, I challenged a lot of it. I'm glad I did because not everything spoken on this forum and places like it is entirely true, but some things are and I had to prove it to myself. I'm not sure you can understand most of it at all without experiences to relate it to, regardless of maturity.

I agree that not everything PUAs say is true, although to a lot of guys all of it is sacred text which cannot be doubted. Some of it is true, some of it isn't, some of it applies in some cases and not in others, some is useful in some situations and not others, some depends on what you are trying to accomplish, etc, etc.

If I were to go back in time and give myself this material, I'm not sure I wouldn't end up getting in trouble with it. Like "ending up dead outside a bar somewhere with my head beaten in with a crowbar" trouble. Some of the PUA techniques I've read would have gotten you a severe beating 30-40 years ago.

 

[Mike32ct]

I agree that not everything PUAs say is true, although to a lot of guys all of it is sacred text which cannot be doubted. Some of it is true, some of it isn't, some of it applies in some cases and not in others, some is useful in some situations and not others, some depends on what you are trying to accomplish, etc, etc.

If I were to go back in time and give myself this material, I'm not sure I wouldn't end up getting in trouble with it. Like "ending up dead outside a bar somewhere with my head beaten in with a crowbar" trouble. Some of the PUA techniques I've read would have gotten you a severe beating 30-40 years ago.

True. Besides the “looks denial” that I won’t rehash here, there is a lot of “risk of fights” denial in PUA materials. They makes it sound like it’s perfectly safe to go into mixed sets without other guys getting pissed off by your presence.

I’ve never been in a fight at a bar or club, but then I never used the PUA “Three Second Rule.” I always very carefully assess the situation to be sure that the lone wolf female is actually alone lol.

I also don’t try to AMOG other guys, eg make backhanded compliments on his shirt like Tyler suggested lol.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

Meeting women hasn’t changed all that much because people haven’t changed very much in recent history. The change has been in technology and in the availability of knowledge and material that men can learn independent from gaining experience on their own.

When my parents were in law school in the 1960s meeting women in real life was very similar to how it is now, going by the stories my parents & their friends relate. My father was a very “alpha” type man by all standards spoken about here, and always had abundance with women. Hell, my dad dated my mom for 2 years in law school, broke up with her, married another chick, and then decided he didn’t like the other chick after 6 months being married, got divorced, and went back to my mom & talked her into eloping with him over a weekend. They were then married for 20 years until my dad got involved with his mistress, divorced my mom & married his mistress, who was by his side for 33 years until his death. I will say she kept him on a very short leash, lol.

So swagger (which my dad had in spades) has always been swagger. It wasn’t any different when my ex and I were in the nightclub business 20 years ago and it isn’t appreciably different now in real life....

What’s different is technology. Technology can give you information but field knowledge remains field knowledge. Without field knowledge a man has little or no experience and you MUST get out there and get experience and learn not to be petrified of rejection.

Think of it like asking about ketchup. You want ketchup with those fries? No? Is that a big deal? Not at all. You have to learn to see rejection as asking for ketchup with those fries and not get all freaked out or butthurt about it if the answer is no.

As you get experience you’ll get more comfortable and more confident. And confidence is one of those intangible things women are deeply drawn to.

Back away from the keyboard and get out there. That’s how you learn. In the end it’s the only way to learn game or anything else.

By doing.