Former Co-Worker: Hot But Pissed At Me

[davidcarr]

The girl:
She's a seriously hot gal who worked as part of the general admin (i.e. secretarial receptionist paperwork team) in my division. This girl had a big crush on me, constantly staring and blushing if I said hello. However, on a couple of occasions, I got paperwork and emails late for some important projects which led to significant delays.
I called the admin team, not knowing it was her. I gave her an earful, going off about the delays and possible costs yada yada. They were calm and professional and said they'd look into it.

So, a couple of weeks later I found out it wasn't the general admin team, it was IT that was to blame! So I had been blaming her and her colleagues for someone else's problems. They were so scared of me by then they were afraid to correct me and let me know it was IT.

She transferred positions (probably new position paid better) but I still see her around from time to time outside of work. Surprisingly often, actually. Surprised because girls this hot usually get locked down quickly in relationships or get married and taken care of for life.

The problem:
Whenever she sees me, she makes a big deal about it, showing her displeasure: for example by turning her back quickly and folding her arms. Another time she turned her back AND held her purse in front of her face as I was passing by. So basically she becomes overly dramatic as women have a tendency to do.

I try to ignore her too but she's pretty hot and I can't always do so. Honestly I also feel pretty guilty and embarrassed about the whole thing so there's that as well. It's getting super awkward though as I see her out at least 2 or 3 times a month if not more.

The Solution:
I'm thinking about breaking the ice and just walking up and apologizing. It seems like the right thing to do, regardless. Yeah, she could be super harsh: after all, work is no longer a consideration. But she seems like a nice enough girl that she couldn't possibly get pissed off at an apology! If she vented a little, I couldn't blame her either.

I don't think she's gossiped about it or thrown me under the bus with her girlfriends. Some of her girlfriends stare at me with lust and none of them give me dirty looks.

This inicident took place a little over a year ago. She's still visibly pissed and I'm still feeling guilty and embarrassed by it. I would just like to get it off my chest. Gooder kharma perhaps?

 

[marvinlfloresq]

She's a seriously hot gal who worked as part of the general admin (i.e. secretarial receptionist paperwork team) in my division. This girl had a big crush on me, constantly staring and blushing if I said hello. However, on a couple of occasions, I got paperwork and emails late for some important projects which led to significant delays. I called the admin team, not knowing it was her. I gave her an earful, going off about the delays and possible costs yada yada. They were calm and professional and said they'd look into it.

So, a couple of weeks later I found out it wasn't the general admin team, it was IT that was to blame! So I had been blaming her and her colleagues for someone else's problems. They were so scared of me by then they were afraid to correct me and let me know it was IT.

She transferred positions (probably new position paid better) but I still see her around from time to time outside of work. Surprisingly often, actually. Surprised because girls this hot usually get locked down quickly in relationships or get married and taken care of for life.

Whenever she sees me, she makes a big deal about it, showing her displeasure: for example by turning her back quickly and folding her arms. Another time she turned her back AND held her purse in front of her face as I was passing by. So basically she becomes overly dramatic as women have a tendency to do.

I try to ignore her too but she's pretty hot and I can't always do so. Honestly I also feel pretty guilty and embarrassed about the whole thing so there's that as well. It's getting super awkward though as I see her out at least 2 or 3 times a month if not more.

I'm thinking about breaking the ice and just walking up and apologizing. It seems like the right thing to do, regardless. Yeah, she could be super harsh: after all, work is no longer a consideration. But she seems like a nice enough girl that she couldn't possibly get pissed off at an apology! If she vented a little, I couldn't blame her either.

This inicident took place a little over a year ago. She's still visibly passed and I'm still feeling guilty and embarrassed by it. I would just like to get it off my chest. Gooder kharma perhaps?

Did "she" say: I have a crush on you? Im just curious, i don't think she did.

You are attracted to her, but it's a work environment, the moment to apologize is over. You will only make things awkward.
Then she will tell her co-workers.

You are behaving like this is the only hot woman you will ever meet.

Just move on. She ignores you, too bad for her. Stop letting it affect you. Dont try to engage, just hello & good bye.

Even if you apologize and try to date her, you lack the self control to let it get to a healthy place & could regret it later. IMO
Drop it.

 

[davidcarr]

Did "she" say: I have a crush on you? Blah blah blah.

This sounds hopelessly naive. And yes, she is a woman. No need for quotation marks.

Your response is so far offbase it nearly qualifies as complete trash.

 

[marvinlfloresq]

This sounds hopelessly naive. And yes, she is a woman. No need for quotation marks.

Your response is so far offbase it nearly qualifies as complete trash.

Excuse me?

Why are you so sensitive, you asked for an opinion, don't be upset its not what you want to hear.

You said she had a crush on you, well her "behavior" is not saying that. You are projecting your agenda. Thats why I used "quotation" marks. If you do not understand something, just ask.

Worse, this happen over a year ago, correct? Why does it matter now? Why is "her" behavior affecting you? You are there to work. Drop it.
If you want to go apologize to her, go ahead,
Its kind of late now. It wont be a sinsere apology. This should of happen on the spot.

David, you are free to do what ever you want,
& make what ever you want out of this. I wasnt trying to be rude. You gave the wrong department an attitude at work, now you wanna give me crap for sharing my opinion lol.

You need self control brother. Peace

 

[davidcarr]

Excuse me?

Why are you so sensitive, you asked for an opinion, don't be upset its not what you want to hear.

You said she had a crush on you, well her "behavior" is not saying that. You are projecting your agenda. Thats why I used "quotation" marks. If you do not understand something, just ask.

Worse, this happen over a year ago, correct? Why does it matter now? Why is "her" behavior affecting you? You are there to work. Drop it.
If you want to go apologize to her, go ahead,
Its kind of late now. It wont be a sinsere apology. This should of happen on the spot.

David, you are free to do what ever you want,
& make what ever you want out of this. I wasnt trying to be rude. You gave the wrong department an attitude at work, now you wanna give me crap for sharing my opinion lol.

You need self control brother. Peace

Your take is hot garbage and I called it that. That's just honesty, not anger. You're just projecting.

You are extremely naive. No need to explain further.

 

[smokeforfun]

You sound like someone who is falling in love.
But I do agree that what marvinlfloresq said sounds harsh, but so is truth sometimes.
Maybe you can turn that around but not with an apology. You should have apologized as soon as you found out, that would have made it sound like it’s true.
Try to break the ice somehow, but care with what may be under the ice.

 

[davidcarr]

There are way too many virgins on this forum.

 

[smokeforfun]

U the man ! A real man that can’t say sorry when he is wrong. Because that is what being a man is about. But then wants to apology a year later.
Clear your head.

 

[Spaz]

Your take is hot garbage and I called it that. That's just honesty, not anger. You're just projecting.

You are extremely naive. No need to explain further.

U r the 1 being naive and a sensitive little mummy boy here.

I don't see eye 2 eye with many of Marvin's post but he's spot on in this thread.

 

[Murk]

There are way too many virgins on this forum.

says the pvssy making threads about chicks at work that don’t want him

Get a grip, this girl is actively avoiding you and I’m not surprised, your attitude stinks

 

[soulforge]

You sound like someone who is falling in love.
But I do agree that what marvinlfloresq said sounds harsh, but so is truth sometimes.
Maybe you can turn that around but not with an apology. You should have apologized as soon as you found out, that would have made it sound like it’s true.
Try to break the ice somehow, but care with what may be under the ice.

Judging by the way the OP is over reacting to the advise given to him.. I firmly believe this hot chick has DODGED a bullet.

He over reacted with hot chick unnecessarily.. and is now carrying on in the fashion on SS.

This is someone who puts his foot in, without thinking clearly first, he also has a lack of control over his emotions.

OP if your going to come on an open forum like SS, don't expect us to say exactly what YOU want to hear..

Your going to get varied opinions on here, no need to get pizzy about it.

Its been a year now since the incident, what is the point of an apology this far on.

My guess is, your want to bang this chick, so your looking for a way back in ONE YEAR later.

Move on!

 

[soulforge]

U the man ! A real man that can’t say sorry when he is wrong. Because that is what being a man is about. But then wants to apology a year later.
Clear your head.

And he claims we are the virgins? Haha

This is someone who doesn't even have the balls to say sorry, when he is CLEARLY in the wrong. Very manly indeed.

 

[soulforge]

says the pvssy making threads about chicks at work that don’t want him

Get a grip, this girl is actively avoiding you and I’m not surprised, your attitude stinks

At this rate, op is heading into STALKER territory.

Hot chick is treating op like Ted Bundy.. And runs away like crazy at the site of him!

And here we are ONE year later, op is making threads about her and getting all upset and emotional.

WTF

 

[sosousage]

So, a couple of weeks later I found out it wasn't the general admin team, it was IT that was to blame! So I had been blaming her and her colleagues for someone else's problems. They were so scared of me by then they were afraid to correct me and let me know it was IT.

wow u have biggger problems than this gal

 

[sosousage]

funny you blamed and scared little gals what would happen if they were big men?

 

[smokeforfun]

This inicident took place a little over a year ago. She's still visibly pissed and I'm still feeling guilty and embarrassed by it. I would just like to get it off my chest. Gooder kharma perhaps?

Is our fault guys. He never asked for advice. He had his problem and his solution. All he ever wanted was to get it off his chest.

 

[AttackFormation]

Put this guy on ignore.

 

[marmel75]

Judging by the way the OP is over reacting to the advise given to him.. I firmly believe this hot chick has DODGED a bullet.

He over reacted with hot chick unnecessarily.. and is now carrying on in the fashion on SS.

This is someone who puts his foot in, without thinking clearly first, he also has a lack of control over his emotions.

OP if your going to come on an open forum like SS, don't expect us to say exactly what YOU want to hear..

Your going to get varied opinions on here, no need to get pizzy about it.

Its been a year now since the incident, what is the point of an apology this far on.

My guess is, your want to bang this chick, so your looking for a way back in ONE YEAR later.

Move on!

Another troll who goes to great lengths to pretend he is not a troll. The responses to common sense advice gives it away tho.

 

[marmel75]

Put this guy on ignore.

Done

 

[davidcarr]

Judging by the way the OP is over reacting to the advise given to him.. I firmly believe this hot chick has DODGED a bullet.

He over reacted with hot chick unnecessarily.. and is now carrying on in the fashion on SS.

This is someone who puts his foot in, without thinking clearly first, he also has a lack of control over his emotions.

OP if your going to come on an open forum like SS, don't expect us to say exactly what YOU want to hear..

Your going to get varied opinions on here, no need to get pizzy about it.

Its been a year now since the incident, what is the point of an apology this far on.

My guess is, your want to bang this chick, so your looking for a way back in ONE YEAR later.

Move on!

What are you gay? You make it sound like a bad thing!

I was swamped with work and under ridiculous deadline pressure, and most everyone realized that.

She is a very subdued, calm person but is borderline making a scene every time she sees me. It's time to put it to rest and have a laugh about it. If she's still pissy after a year, AND an apology, that's her problem.