I was planning on making a charisma thread. Charisma comes from seeing the positive in any situation and charming people with it. When my life is going well there is nothing anyone can say to upset me or get under my skin. I enjoy giving and give people the benefit of the doubt. If I suspect foul play I disengage with a smile, because I'm just an extension of a natural force that will teach this person what they need to learn. It all happens very naturally and effortlessly.
When you talk with lots of girls and dismiss most of them you start to realize it's just a natural process of filtration. There's nothing wrong with you, you're upholding your standards. Personally I see myself as able to talk to anyone and make a relationship work with anyone, but I choose to hold out for qualities I adore. I trust in my ability to make good choices for my future self.
When you catch a self critical thought rejoice, as that moment of insight is a sign of mindfulness and self awareness. Realize that lessons of any kind are best learned in a calm, collected, and empowering state of mind, not a self defeating one. Also realize that you can manifest positivity as easily as you can manifest negativity. Like any undeveloped skill it will seem forced and uncomfortable at first, but the mind gets better at anything it does repeatedly. Over time it becomes second nature. If you think you're faking it then it will feel fake and hollow to you, and by effect to those around you. If you truly believe in your thoughts, choices, and actions, if you go 'all in' on positive beliefs, it will feel wholesome and fulfilling, and you will radiate that vibe to others through your subconscious behavior.
If a person is able to make me sour or angry then I've already lost. I resign at that point and take it as a sign to focus on mastering my mind. When you're slaying dragons and loving the crap out of it rejections don't register as anything negative. If anything it registers as positive. Precious time and effort saved, more freedom.
The skill of positive intention is much like improv, you learn to be quick witted. When something happens that irks me and I catch myself starting to go down a negative thought path I rejoice for the mindfulness I've developed to notice it, then think of a clever way to lift the mood. If the other person continues to try and bring the mood down it's only more practice for me. When nothing upsets you because you've gotten so good at this you'll feel invincible, and others will pick up on that. Don't do it for the attention, do it because you are more useful to society and the world in a positive state of mind, because you want to serve the world as best you can.
I'm a tall built mofo with a serious resting face, so constantly charming with a positive attitude works wonders for me. It helps mitigate any intimidation people may feel, and usually brightens their day. I actually get off to making people laugh so hard they stop breathing. It's a weird power trip that I really enjoy exercising.
I've disarmed countless situations with a simple smile and a funny observation about the environment. Positivity is infectious and healthy folk bask in it. When you radiate it effortlessly you'll find yourself in good company.