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******** Translated

Discussion in 'Don Juan Tips' started by Deep Dish, Dec 5, 2002.

  1. Deep Dish

    Deep Dish Master Don Juan

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    Do you have a girlfriend?
    [She either wants you or wants to hook up you with her friends]

    I have a boyfriend.
    I have a boyfriend.

    I have a boyfriend.
    I just want you to take the big hint I'm not interested and leave.

    I have a boyfriend.
    He's actually an ex-boyfriend in another state, but for you he will count.

    I have a boyfriend.
    Just to let you know so when you're banging me I could say you knew.

    Why don't you give me your number instead?
    So you can never call me? I will throw away your number when I get to the nearest trash can.

    I'll call.
    I won't.

    I'm busy
    I am trying to string along your attention.

    I have to study.
    I don't want you to realize the math behind what I am saying.
    [Think about it. Even if a woman were to study eight hours (and no one studies that long) and start a relative late 10:00 am, she'd still be available from 6:00 pm and later. She is essentially telling you to believe that she's studying Friday night, all Saturday, all Sunday, non-stop with no time available between studying, eating, sleeping, and breathing.]

    I need space.
    I found someone else.

    I'm not like other girls
    Who all think the same exact thing.

    Can you buy me a drink?
    Can I scam you?

    I'm tired, my back is sore.
    Massage me.

    What do you do for fun?
    Are we compatible?

    Do you smoke?
    Are we compatible?

    Where do you live?
    My place or yours?

    Do you need a ride?
    I want to spend time with you.

    He's just a friend.
    I'm gullible.

    He's just a friend.
    He's not.

    I have a lot of crap going on in my life.
    Hell is funner than you.

    I don't kiss on the first date.
    I have a 'rule' against dating you. You disgust me.

    I don't kiss on the first date.
    Challenge me.
    [Women use 'rules' as an artificial construct to gain control over their bodies of how they would otherwise act out.]

    I usually like...
    But I may hate it with you.

    I usually don't like...
    But I may like it with you.

    I have a policy against dating guys at work.
    Or how so I want YOU to think.

    I like you but...
    No.

    I have too much things going on in my life.
    ...all those other guys banging me...

    I'm not like that.
    Of course I am.

    I'm not looking for a relationship right now.
    I do want, just not with you.

    I'm not looking for a relationship right now.
    I want no-strings.

    What are you doing tonight?
    I want you to ask me out right now.

    Are you gay?
    Why don't you want ME?!
    [One of the greatest questions a man can ever be asked.]

    What kind of girls do you date?
    Do you like me?

    Can I bring friends along?
    Can I wreck your dating plans and lose any respect for you?

    I need to control myself.
    I'm a slut.
    [Goes back to 'rules'.]

    It's not that I'm a slut, I just have a high drive.
    I'm a slut.

    It's not that I'm a slut, I just sleep with all guys I date.
    While I won't sleep with just any guy, I want to sleep with you.

    It's not that I'm a slut...
    I'm a slut.

    I'm single and I can date anyone I want [said with a raised voice to make sure you hear it].
    I want you to ask me out.

    I like tall men.
    It's not that I like tall men, I just like the feeling of protection tall men provide.

    [Woman curses or otherwise has some normally negatively deemed trait revealed about her] That didn't come out right/Ignore that/Oh forget about that.
    I don't want you to lose interest in me.

    I was wearing this dress and it slid up you know where. [I heard this one yesterday and I had just met the woman.]
    I want you to notice me.
    [Women mention their body parts when they want you to take notice.]

    Yes.
    Yes.

    No.
    No.

    Yes.
    No.

    No.
    Yes.

    ------------------
    Formerly Inspector Clouseau
     
  2. Mack Of All Trades

    Mack Of All Trades Master Don Juan

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    Great post! It would be bible material, but only after you give credit to the DJ who wrote an article just like this. It is already in the bible, but you provide an excellent extension.
     
  3. Mystic

    Mystic Don Juan

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    Woah! "Are you gay" is actually a good thing? Ive been asked that twice in the past 2 months, both hot aggresive type girls.
     
  4. tweeder

    tweeder Senior Don Juan

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    LOL. Oh the famous "Are you gay?" line. I've been asked this one a few times. And what's funny is that I never got asked this question until after I found this site. Coincidence? I think not. [​IMG]

    I notice that it usually comes from women that are used to guys falling at their feet, and for whatever reason you don't give a s*** about them. Great confidence booster. Unless you never date and wear bright colored sweaters. Then you might want to re-evaluate your lifestyle. lol.
     
  5. Barbillus

    Barbillus Senior Don Juan

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    I disagree with the I have Boyfriend lines.

    Some girls say they have bf but will gladly give him up just for the next best guy.

    There are many posts in these forums discussing just this.
     
  6. MsThang

    MsThang Master Don Juan

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    While Pooks post was not only funny but probably about 85% relevant, yours are just crap. No offence, dude, but that guide is way too bitter to be helpful. I recommend reading Pooks.

    And asking if you're gay DOES NOT mean that! She usually asks this if you either dress a little too well or if she thinks she catches you scoping other guys.
     
  7. Ashlee Angel

    Ashlee Angel Master Don Juan

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    I'm in the same boat Tweed

    ------------------
    -Roman W
    Eveygirl wants to be with him, Every guy wants to be like him.
     
  8. Pancho

    Pancho Senior Don Juan

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    Hey, just thought id let you know...I study 8 hours a day sometimes lol. So dont say NOBODY does it. There are times i have so much homework, and so much studying, where I dont do ANYTHING besides eat, sleep, shower and study for an entire weekend.

    Am I abnormal...yep. But i have used that comment on other people..not because i didnt want to go out, but because i couldnt. It can be distracting if you study, then go out...cuz its really hard to go back to studying once you come back. Besides, there intermittent studying, with half hour breaks.

    Lol...sorry, I just wanted ta give you some grief, old boy. Not a bad post anyhow.

    Pancho

    btw whats up with the name deep dish..i liked your old name. Is it cuz of the whole head shaving thing, that you felt you needed to change your name as well?

    ------------------
    If all men were created equal, then how is it im better? --Pancho
     
  9. STR8UP

    STR8UP Master Don Juan

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    Take your criticism elsewhere sweetheart.

    I used to get that line LONG before I started taking good care of my shoes. And before you bring up how I may be 'affeminate' or something the like that I can tell you that is absolutely not the case.

    I'll bet you are looking for a NICE GUY too, am I right?
     
  10. oOh Nasty

    oOh Nasty Master Don Juan

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    MsThang is a guy dumbass lol
     
  11. Dario

    Dario Senior Don Juan

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    Not includinh THAT, the rest is quite good. I'll remember the "Are you gay?" question for the next time [​IMG]
     
  12. Deep Dish

    Deep Dish Master Don Juan

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    I was told the reasoning behind "Are you gay?" before I found out here.

    Women having gay friends is like whites having black friends, something of which we can use to say we have a balanced set of friends. Also, gays tend to be very intelligent, well-spoken, well dressed, very sensitive and open with their emotions, and pay attention to details (e.g. listen). Giovanni Casanova once made a thread about gay guys having women strip in front of them all the time and even begging for sex. Giovanni was onto something. You don't have to be gay or have a lisp, but if you seem gay, as in having the listed traits associated with gays, and when confronted with "Are you gay?" give an ambiguous answer ("Well, am I?"), that can open up the world of women to you. Women who ask you "Are you gay?" are attracted to you and wonder why their feminity, which normally makes men cave, isn't enough for you.


    Pancho,

    Long time no hear. I changed the name because I felt the old was no longer representative of who I am, with the old name representing my overthinking, passive, clumsy, repellant past. Deep Dish is a musical duo and the name has sexual connotation. You could say my shaving of the head, and its subsequent drastic change in my life in how I am perceived, prompted the change.


    Dario,
    There are times when a woman gives verbal resistance; "I'm not sure if I'm ready", "Let's wait", "I'm not like that", "I don't have sex on the first date", etc.; while at the same time putting up no physical resistance. There are also times when a woman will repeatedly ensure you that she really likes you, but yet when push comes to shove won't go out with you. So, indeed, sometimes 'yes' means 'no' and 'no' means 'yes'.

    ------------------
    Formerly Inspector Clouseau
     
  13. STR8UP

    STR8UP Master Don Juan

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    I wonder how I could have made that mistake, dumbass lol

    Doesn't change the fact that "he" shouldn't be criticising someone elses thread when "he" doesn't know what the hell he's talking about himself.
     
  14. oOh Nasty

    oOh Nasty Master Don Juan

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    i agree with MsThang. we don't need another "********" post when Pook already has a great one in the forums. dumbass. lol
     
  15. MsThang

    MsThang Master Don Juan

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    Sure thing, sweetheart. Dumbass lol
     
  16. Pook

    Pook Master Don Juan

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    i agree with MsThang. we don't need another "********" post when Pook already has a great one in the forums. dumbass. lol

    Don't discourage anyone. We always need more posts.

    DeepDish said,

    Women having gay friends is like whites having black friends, something of which we can use to say we have a balanced set of friends. Also, gays tend to be very intelligent, well-spoken, well dressed, very sensitive and open with their emotions, and pay attention to details (e.g. listen). Giovanni Casanova once made a thread about gay guys having women strip in front of them all the time and even begging for sex. Giovanni was onto something. You don't have to be gay or have a lisp, but if you seem gay, as in having the listed traits associated with gays, and when confronted with "Are you gay?" give an ambiguous answer ("Well, am I?"), that can open up the world of women to you. Women who ask you "Are you gay?" are attracted to you and wonder why their feminity, which normally makes men cave, isn't enough for you.

    I'm in that 'world' that gays get to be in with women. Yes, they have stripped for me and all. I just laugh at them. Stupid girls.

    A big problem I have is wherever I go (like a class or work where I am there repeatedly), girls will begin thinking, "Pook is gay."

    Yes, it can mean that you are dressing too nicely (sometimes I have my sexuality shined too far and must lower it. Sometimes I swing back to AFC style just to shake it off).

    I like dressing nicely. I feel better and everyone takes me more seriously (and girls stare, mmm hmm). But when the gay thing comes up (and it does almost all the time now), I ask the girls playfully knowing the answer already (the one they won't admit to my face).

    "Why do they keep thinking i'm gay?"

    "Well... You do dress nice."

    "What has that got to do with it? People dress nice all the time! Fine. Next time I'll come in with my worst clothes ever."

    "No, then you'll be called a 'homeless gay'." (and she laughs and rubs Pook).

    If girls ask if you are gay, remember the important thing: they are thinking of you in a sexual context. One of girls' favorite jokes is to tease a guy they like with another guy they like, pointing the two within a gay relationship. They just enjoy thinking about you in a sexual context. It is a victory.

    One problem I have now are guys thinking I am gay. Have I crossed the line? Am I now a flaming Pook? No, when I talk to them personally they respond. You will get this from guys in high school who seem obsessed with gayness and so insecure of their own masculinity (since they are still just kids).

    It's something I haven't seen talked much on this board: ENVY. The guys are envious. They hear the girls chatter, "He must be gay!" and think it seriously (because they want it to be true). They wish they were on these women's minds. They see how Pook has some special touch with the women, can talk to them with perfect ease, can play with them, etc. One guy's mouth fell open when a girl and I had a conversation completely in ******** (I've learned to speak it back to them!).

    Truly gay guys start off in a denial about themselves and then date a whole bunch of women, sleep with them, to remove doubts about themselves. Alas, they realize they are not satisfied with women and admit they go for men.

    Perhaps there is a way to turn the tables on these women. Next time I see a hot woman who is not interested in me, I will declare, "What! She doesn't want to have sex with me? She must be gay!"

    And what can they say to that!
     
  17. STR8UP

    STR8UP Master Don Juan

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    Pooks most eloquent statement to date.

    [This message has been edited by STR8UP (edited 12-08-2002).]
     
  18. djcovenman

    djcovenman Don Juan

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  19. Viroid

    Viroid Master Don Juan

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    It does mean she wants you. Would a woman approach a man and ask, "are you gay" just to see if hes gay? HELL NO!

    Its a very safe approach for a woman to make. A lot of sluts like to ask this question.

    Its happened to me before. This slut wanted me, heavy eye contact, smiles, anon messages on my phone, the whole 9 yards. We're at the bar with a large group of friends and she asks, "are you gay?" So, i put my hand on her arse and say, "no, but i do like to butt phuck women." She was hot. To bad she has an STD. [​IMG]

    ------------------
    "Fear is for...getting your confidence." -STEVEN HELLER, PhD

    "Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious!" - FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE
     
  20. MsThang

    MsThang Master Don Juan

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    I don't even know how to properly respond to the "r u gay because I want you" statement because it is surreally stupid and therefore impossible to respond to. Monstrously, atrociously retarded. How do argue with illogic?
     

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