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The significance of a "couples profile pic"

bigneil

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This is a quote from the Psychology Today article

"Recent evidence suggests that people who are more satisfied in their romantic relationshipsare more apt to post an usie as a primary Facebook profile picture compared to those who are less satisfied (Saslow, Muise, Impett, & Dubin, 2013). In other words, a person’s profile picture can be a pictoral representation of relationship closeness. The act of having your own profile photo include a picture of your partner, suggests that your own self-concept includes your partner; presenting the “self” as an “us” in a profile picture correspond with satisfaction and closeness (Saslow et al., 2013).


If your profile picture contains you and you alone, this doesn’t mean you have an unhappy relationship. The broader context matters. Couples negotiate with each other to maintain a degree of privacy with which each member is comfortable (Zhao et al., 2012). This might mean refraining from posting couple photos or status updates that reference the partner or it might mean regularly posting content that affirms the relationship. Partners must strategically balance their own and their partners’ interests to show-off or keep private their relationship with outsiders’ (e.g., friends, relatives) desires to see pictures or hear updates that say something about the relationship. The selfie versus the usie may be just the tip of the ice-berg when learning to navigate relationship presentation online."


I believe when a girl doesn't put you in her profile pic (but maybe has for guys in her past,) there are three potential reasons:

1) she's not THAT crazy about you (you may be filling a blank for her) and she questions/doubts a longterm future with you
2) she's crazed for male attention and doesn't want to end that by including you in her profile pic
3) She wants to keep things "private"
Subtitled: I'm the type of dumbas-s who wants to be in relationship on Facebook.

Photos, yes. Their whole profile and every deliberation? You want to be in touch with her aunts and uncles??

Facebook is one of the least seductive, least romantic experiences. It's by definition average. We say what pleases the most people.

My gf has no Facebook and if she did I would never friend her. That's for exes.
 

cityboy989

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Subtitled: I'm the type of dumbas-s who wants to be in relationship on Facebook.

Photos, yes. Their whole profile and every deliberation? You want to be in touch with her aunts and uncles??

Facebook is one of the least seductive, least romantic experiences. It's by definition average. We say what pleases the most people.

My gf has no Facebook and if she did I would never friend her. That's for exes.
Facebook is average? Try telling that to 99% of young women today
 

bigneil

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I'm saying the average quote on Facebook is average romantically.
  • My cat died.
  • I just ate a burrito.
  • I love this person.
  • This is my grandmother.
Don't be a moron. Do NOT be friends with girls you like romantically. EVER.

Facebook is average? Try telling that to 99% of young women today
Let me see if I have this straight:

1) You said your girl has BPD.
2) You said you are too concerned about privacy to put her photos here (on SS, a site ranked 157,000 worldwide which is hardly ever found via Google searches).
3) You want to actually be IN her PROFILE picture for everyone you and she knows on Earth to see?? (On Facebook, the #3 most popular site on Earth).
 
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I'm saying the average quote on Facebook is average romantically.

  • My cat died.
  • I just ate a burrito.
  • I love this person.
  • This is my grandmother.


Let me see if I have this straight:

1) You said your girl has BPD.
2) You said you are too concerned about privacy to put her photos here (on SS, a site ranked 157,000 worldwide which is hardly ever found via Google searches).
3) You want to actually be IN her PROFILE picture for everyone you and she knows on Earth to see?? (On Facebook, the #3 most popular site on Earth).
Lol hahahahaha
 

bigneil

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Regarding my current romance, understand: I make sure that every single word communicated in any format has a purpose, namely to seduce her. See The Demonic Power of Words in Art of Seduction.

You can't control Facebook and she can go back in your history and make judgements on comments you made months ago while in a different mood, in a different situation.

Facebook makes you look VERY average QUICKLY, and you will bore her with your random comments. You will become WAY too familiar. The only time Facebook ever helped me get laid was when a 19 year old girl (my high school sweetheart from the photos) saw pictures of a 20 year old girl I was dating and she threw herself at me. And that's if you're a photographer dating a supermodel who can impress another supermodel (both girls photos rated as high as 99) and taking them to fancy restaurants and hotels and islands. But Facebook then ruined our relationship once we cared.

Want to win her over? Unfriend her and refuse to say why. Be the ONE guy who isn't liking pictures of fluffy thinking he'll score. Romances are best in text format.
 

BeTheChange

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But you get social proof and preselection by having her there. There is no real loss on your end.
If you want to bang other women there is!

Also it's worth taking anyone who's over 40's advice on Facebook with a grain of salt. It's a generational thing. And most won't understand.

Facebook can provide a tremendous amount of social proof if used correctly.

I recently had multiple women trying to arrange dates with me after they saw pics I'd posted in Dubai partying hard with my Italian American paramour, shirtless on the beach and ocean, at the Burj Khalifa, etc. You get the point.

Girls want to have fun, they want the lifestyle. If your profile reflects this you can game them without even trying.
 
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bigneil

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Girls want to have fun, they want the lifestyle. If your profile reflects this you can game them without even trying.
What girls? Girls you've known for years and never had sex with? Girls you never met in person but friended? Girls from some far away location?

You shouldn't have any girls you care about on Facebook to begin with.

You can still impress the girls you are dating with photos from Dubai, just keep that separate from telling Uncle Leon you're sorry he got bad news at the foot doctor.
 

cityboy989

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What girls? Girls you've known for years and never had sex with? Girls you never met in person but friended? Girls from some far away location?

You shouldn't have any girls you care about on Facebook to begin with.

You can still impress the girls you are dating with photos from Dubai, just keep that separate from telling Uncle Leon you're sorry he got bad news at the foot doctor.
I don't think there's a single young adult on facebook who DOESN'T have their significant other as a friend. Like, what the hell dude?
 

bigneil

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I don't think there's a single young adult on facebook who DOESN'T have their significant other as a friend. Like, what the hell dude?
Did you just use the words like and dude in the same sentence? Jesus f*cking Christ.

What part about get off Facebook did you not understand?


Winner! cityboy989! Most like everyone else. Congratulations, cityboy989. Like, you're totally common, dude. Keep liking that stuff about her aunt and you might score some day. Might. But make sure you don't let US know who you and she are, just everyone else on Earth.

 

cityboy989

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Did you just use the words like and dude in the same sentence? Jesus f*cking Christ.

What part about get off Facebook did you not understand?


Winner! cityboy989! Most like everyone else. Congratulations, cityboy989. Like, you're totally common, dude. Keep liking that stuff about her aunt and you might score some day. Might. But make sure you don't let US know who you and she are, just everyone else on Earth.

Sorry, I forgot "like" and "dude" are way after your time.
 

BeTheChange

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I don't think there's a single young adult on facebook who DOESN'T have their significant other as a friend. Like, what the hell dude?
This is what I mean by over 40 and out of touch. I see the same issues with those who advise against texting. Its a generational thing. You need to understand the context from which people give advice. Will make your life a lot easier here.
 

bigneil

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Sorry, I forgot "like" and "dude" are way after your time.
Like... "Don't call me dude" was the #1 Heavy Metal Song of 1990 - like 27 years ago.

How old are you?

Just so you know, for your whole life, smarter people knew not to call people dude. But go ahead and pretend you are trendy with your likes, Facebook, dudes and BPD women, all without ever sharing one photo of the women (likely wrapped in sheets and with dots on their foreheads) who you whine to us about.

This is what I mean by over 40 and out of touch. I see the same issues with those who advise against texting. Its a generational thing. You need to understand the context from which people give advice. Will make your life a lot easier here.
Hmm... I'm dating a 21 year old woman - how old are the women you guys are dating?

Another moron who thinks Facebook helps you score.

Funny how you young guys don't have hotter OR younger women than I do. But you can pretend I'm out of touch and keep your fat women secret and pretend, how's that?

OOH! Your gerbil photo got a like from your cousin! Maybe THAT will impress the girl you've pined over for years and never so much as kissed.
 

cityboy989

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This is what I mean by over 40 and out of touch. I see the same issues with those who advise against texting. Its a generational thing. You need to understand the context from which people give advice. Will make your life a lot easier here.
Exactly. To old folks, "it's just facebook." Your girl can post a thousand cleavage pics, be flirting with other dudes, etc. Oh but "it's just facebook." As far as what young people post on Facebook, as you said, the older generations are too stubborn and/or out-of-touch to understand that social media holds value for young people. Most young women run to facebook for anything. So what they do or don't do, or say or don't say, can be telling.
 

bigneil

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Winner! Post most liked by men who haven't dated girls as hot as bigneil has (but who do frequent Dubai and DC strip clubs).
Exactly. To old folks...
Needle off record:
  • How old is your girlfriend? (mine is 21)
  • How long have you dated? (mine is 9 months)
  • Will you show us a photo? (mine is rated 99/100)
Prediction: (crickets from faggyboy who will report this as flaming, seeing he's a she).


Figure 1: Cityboy, BeTheChange and LaRaidersLosttoNE think the person dating this woman is too old to have any say here.
 
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greatsnake

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way too many people care about how they're perceived by their social media network. It's a matter of personal preference, but I don't if my girlfriend does/doesn't make me a part of their profile picture.
 

greatsnake

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Winner! Post most liked by men who haven't dated girls as hot as bigneil has (but who do frequent Dubai and DC strip clubs).

Needle off record:
  • How old is your girlfriend? (mine is 21)
  • How long have you dated? (mine is 9 months)
  • Will you show us a photo? (mine is rated 99/100)

Prediction: (crickets from faggyboy who will report this as flaming, seeing he's a she).

Figure 1: Cityboy, BeTheChange and LaRaidersLosttoNE think the person dating this woman is too old to have any say here.


10/10
 

cityboy989

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way too many people care about how they're perceived by their social media network. It's a matter of personal preference, but I don't if my girlfriend does/doesn't make me a part of their profile picture.
Not a matter of public perception, it's questioning the interest level of the girl. I feel it depends on the nature of the girl. Is she "showy" on facebook? Does she air alot of her laundry on facebook? Well then her not having you in her profile pic at any point, could be telling. Especially if she had an ex in her profile pic at one point.
 

randalljohnson

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Not a matter of public perception, it's questioning the interest level of the girl. I feel it depends on the nature of the girl. Is she "showy" on facebook? Does she air alot of her laundry on facebook? Well then her not having you in her profile pic at any point, could be telling. Especially if she had an ex in her profile pic at one point.
I agree with this. If the girl likes to show off her life and everything, why not put your boyfriend in your pic? As you said, especially if they've done it for an ex. Which my gf did. She can go on over these past few months, throwing around terms such as "soulmate" and "finally found happiness" but she cant do something simple like that, which most girls do? It's not the action itself that bothers me, it's the meaning behind it
 

Billtx49

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I agree with this. If the girl likes to show off her life and everything, why not put your boyfriend in your pic? As you said, especially if they've done it for an ex. Which my gf did. She can go on over these past few months, throwing around terms such as "soulmate" and "finally found happiness" but she cant do something simple like that, which most girls do? It's not the action itself that bothers me, it's the meaning behind it
Yes. They show the world what they are proud of and/or happy about… or want to advertise if it's a her only selfie.
Watch her actions
 
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cityboy989

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I agree with this. If the girl likes to show off her life and everything, why not put your boyfriend in your pic? As you said, especially if they've done it for an ex. Which my gf did. She can go on over these past few months, throwing around terms such as "soulmate" and "finally found happiness" but she cant do something simple like that, which most girls do? It's not the action itself that bothers me, it's the meaning behind it
Well, I agree with you. If she naturally posts alot on facebook, and throws terms around as you've indicated; such as claiming that you were her soulmate or that she finally found happiness, I would question why she would cycle through selfies as her profile pic, and none including you. As you said, she did it for her ex. This may be an indication that she's overcompensating her relationship with you, or she could possibly be BPD. It's not uncommon that BPD lovebomb like that, and then do a complete 180 on the guy.
 
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