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The Adventures of Christopher Columbus

ChristopherColumbus

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Well, a new entrant here, and I thought I'd make a record of my philandering adventures. Any comments and advice are welcome. I'm a bit older, in my forties, so kind of interested in getting into a relationship. These days, my modus operandi is 'spinning plates light'; I'll meet woman, mostly through cold approach in coffee shops, and seek to get them into my 'orbit'.

I try to be in contact with four or five girls at any one time in order to organize dates. I guess that should keep me from getting too needy. I have been getting a lot of dates, but they haven't really been going anywhere. Once something develops into a relationship, and I discover my America, I'll look to put down anchor for a bit.
 

ChristopherColumbus

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So I live in perhaps the most conservative country in Asia, South Korea. I have certainly found my work cut out for me as far as women goes.They are beautiful but demure. I kind of like tot think of it as a challenge. My mates go to the Philippines every semester break for a bit of 'sex tourism', but I'm not interested at all in that. I'm more of a 'lover of the chase' kind of guy.

To give you a couple of examples of how I met women recently last week:

1] Emily. A Chinese girl working here at the same university. She also happens to live in the same apartment building as me. With that in mind, I thought I should tread carefully with this girl. I said hello, and chatted to her a couple of times to build a little rapport. I felt she was attracted, so asked got her number the next time we bumped into each-other. Saw her today at university cafe, and pretty much organized a coffee date there and then. There was definitely a nice flirty vibe between us.

2] Mina. Met this girl at the local Starbucks. These days I am a lot more selective in who I approach. Now that I have zero approach anxiety, I do not approach for approach's sake. So I noticed her and took the adjoining seat. I proceeded to keep busy with my laptop for a good half an hour... without giving off the vibe that I wanted to talk to her. I then opened with something like 'You look busy'. And conversation went for there. Sleepy, sexy, sultry girl. A few texts exchanged, and a solid coffee date organized.


Through cold approach, I've found I'm pretty much securing a couple of dates a week. This takes the pressure off me when I hit the bars with a mate. Last weekend, we had a great time drinking with a few ladies at the bar due no doubt to the absence of that 'hungry' look.
 

ChristopherColumbus

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You're young enough to bang hot women in their mid-late 20s, should you choose. Doesn't sound old to me.

Drop that internal encumbrance.
Yes, I feel and look younger than my age. And most of the women I'm meeting are mid twenties thanks to a younger savvy kind of approach on my part. The thing is I actually have an older, or more 'mature', mindset, where I would prefer to meet more mature women. I am not that fussy at the moment as have a scarcity of sex though an abundance of dates... ha ha. Something has to give sooner or later.
 
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ChristopherColumbus

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Men push, and women resist is this game - but that only covers sex. With relationships, it should be the other way around.

With decent game, you'll do more than fine. You'll have options.

Have fun ;)
That's interesting. I live in a conservative city of a foreign country [Korea]. The women here seem to have been pre-programmed to think of all foreign men as players. There have been a few times recently when women have written me off as a 'player'. Hence I need to tone it down a lot... these women are quite different to the jaded women in the west.

I am now working on improving my 'game' to the local conditions:
  • spinning plates 'light' - being in contact with a few girls
  • being more selective when looking to approach new women
  • don't come across as gamey
I guess I'd call my game 'aggressive gentleman'. The women here also have fantasies about gentlemen.
 
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Scaramouche

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Dear Christopher,
Perhaps like him you have made landfall on the Bahamas...but an interesting question,coincidentally,I am going to try and land a Korean Lady tonight,she seems very nice...let's see how I go LOL.
 

ChristopherColumbus

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Dear Christopher,
Perhaps like him you have made landfall on the Bahamas...but an interesting question,coincidentally,I am going to try and land a Korean Lady tonight,she seems very nice...let's see how I go LOL.
Yes, the Korean ladies are nice... but ever so polite. I think it takes a little time for them to relax and become friendly with you. Society over here is very formal and reserved, and they seem constantly worried about what others think. I take it as a challenge.
 

ChristopherColumbus

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So I have become interested in this idea of 'spinning plates'. I can easily meet new woman and bring them into my 'orbit'. At the moment, I have about five woman I am in contact with, yet they still lie in the 'outer planet' region, and then they come and go.... more like the brief appearance of meteors really. My mission is to bring them into the 'Venus' zone with all the gravitas of my Don Juan skills!

Bora.

I noticed Bora a few days back at Starbucks. She sat there staring disconsolately out the window with chin in hand. I sit next to her, and straight away open with a smile. She smiles back. I can't remember the exact conversation, which must have been something banal no doubt, but she was soon leaning into me which showed a lot of comfort on her part. She had cute little delicate hands and the most demure smile. I find when I am really attracted to the woman, the approach tends to be a lot more successful... the gravity of attraction takes over, and then you are just along for the ride. There is no trying. We organized a coffee date there and then for the following weekend.

I text her a few days later 'Happy holidays' [it's a three day national holiday here at the moment]. She replies later in the evening apologizing for the late response. I reply, an hour later, 'Have a good time, and see you next week'. I don't like to text too much, but am one of those guys that tend to err by hardly texting at all [just to organize the date]. A lot of these woman need to build a bit of comfort through texting. That said, I am not interested in texting marathons. Will be interesting to see if this one flakes. I guess that is the importance of spinning a few plates, or having a few options on the table, as you will not get emotionally invested too soon, and get disappointed should you be blown off. These girls owe us nothing when we approach them out of the blue. Never take it personally.
 
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ChristopherColumbus

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Just a general note. I've found the 'manosphere' is an interesting place revolving around the two poles of women and self-development. I think in general, as men mature, we lean toward the second pole, where women become more and more subservient to that end. It is about control of the baser instincts to serve the nobler ones, or in a word, rationality.

Of course, this is how it should be according to the theory of the manosphere. But for those of us with uncontrolled libidos, at the practical level, it is all about women. What's interesting is the way in which this is then justified in some realistic ideology; it's all about a power struggle, it's all about the market place etc.; rationality must come down to earth, and serve the libido instead. Until it doesn't, and then self-development becomes the Trojan Horse of pick-up. The power struggle is within ourselves.:rolleyes:
 
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Julian

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coffee dates. fail. meet at night for a drink. show these chick you arent fkin around.
 

ChristopherColumbus

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coffee dates. fail. meet at night for a drink. show these chick you arent fkin around.
Yes, I have been dong both. The thing is I tend to meet these women in coffee shops to begin with. One woman I met at Starbucks was very proactive with the drinking, hauling me off to two different bars after the coffee. Still failed after a few dates. Part of it no doubt due to her being half my age... ha ha. Got to find those thirty somethings.
 

ChristopherColumbus

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I am not sure whether this be an excuse, but the woman here don't seem to be 'liberated' in the same way as western woman. It's like they are on opposite sides of the sexual revolution. There are plenty of love hotels here, and I am sure they are doing a raging business, but a LOT of alcohol is also involved. It's like the alcohol is an excuse for them to indulge the other side of their nature [but isn't it always, just more-so here]. At times it is semi-rapey as you see men dragging drunken women into hotels... all of course protesting too much.

Given the conservative culture here, it is perhaps best to meet as many girls as possible, date, build comfort, and look for the gf.
 
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ChristopherColumbus

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I've found the more 'accidental' cold approaches are the most successful ones. There is nothing forced about them. You've heard of the accidental tourist, I'm the accidental pick-up artist. It's when I'm going about the normal course of my day that I bump into someone, strike up a conversation, and then get the number. And then I think 'right, let's go out and get some more 'numbers'. This is more often than not a waste of time. The trick is to be ready at all times to switch into pick up mode.... not to be in pick up mode at all times.

I'm also working on a more social circle kind of game, where I can use the relative small size of the city I'm in [2 million] to my advantage. I have a few buddies I can go out drinking with, even though I am not a big drinker. Emily, the Chinese girl, wants to meet for dinner, but also wants to bring her friend. Fine, I will bring a friend also. Or may even flake if I have something better to do.

A Korean hottie, replies to my text and says maybe... possibly... see you Saturday. This is already a virtual flake. So I'll take a buddy to a bar, and tell her to join us for fun... and, bring a girlfriend! ha ha
 
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ubercat

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You're fishing in a nicer pond. Asian girls are my preferred poison however I've never had a KoreanI ll read your adventures with great interest. It's odd I live in Melbourne and I've never picked up in a coffee shop. Overseas Starbucks seems to be the dating equivalent of Grand Central Station
 

ChristopherColumbus

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You're fishing in a nicer pond. Asian girls are my preferred poison however I've never had a KoreanI ll read your adventures with great interest. It's odd I live in Melbourne and I've never picked up in a coffee shop. Overseas Starbucks seems to be the dating equivalent of Grand Central Station
Yes, there certainly are some beautiful women here. I like your idea of fishing... enjoying the activity, and being patient.

Am looking forward to the weekend, where I will switch gears from the coffee shop to the bar. I've recently made some breakthroughs in the way in which I approach women at the bar. The trick is to not obviously 'hit' on them, but just chat and have fun. I find they then lower their defenses and show their flirty side.
 
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ChristopherColumbus

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Attraction is like poetry. You can philosophize about it, analyze it after the event, but when immersed in the seductive dance it is all poetry. 'Pick up' refers to it as being in state, or in flow; all is like water, we are beyond the stones of logic walled up in our heads. It is to the flow of emotion that woman most readily respond. And so to inculcate in me the poetic state, I shall write a poem from time to time and post them here. Starting with this one:

The Fossicker

He saw the open-endedness of life,
Forsook careers, never took a wife.
Property, to him, was but legal fiction,
And systems no more than weighty diction;
An inner instinct would never die,
And from enclosure he’d ever fly
To gaze upon the lie of the land,
Or absorb himself in what lay at hand.

He marveled that it should be at all,
For in the intellect, there was no fall.
As for the seasons, he’d correspond;
Among them were none he found less fond,
But to each he would sing their praises
As if they’d lined up to bring him favors.
Indeed, he thought he were the richest man
There on the bank-side with pan in hand.
 
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ChristopherColumbus

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And this:

A Poet to a Philosopher at the Bar

To your 'Know!' I say No
For Happiness was sacrificed
To Reality long ago.
We no longer tell ourselves stories
About a world where all is right side up.
We no longer tell stories
Because we no longer believe
…..we lost the ability.
Knowledge has substituted Faith.
We can never know anything
Of some realm beyond,
And abolish it altogether.
And if that realm, ideal and real,
Was once the abode of happiness,
Happiness has now contracted
To be found in some concoction
Of chemicals in the brain....
Let us drink and be merry....
It is now for each one of us
To hammer out our happiness
….and ah the few who can escape
This solitude to forge a bond.
From Reality’s perspective,
Happiness is an illusion
And yet, the memory, or the instinct
Or the yearning, for happiness remains -
The ghost in the machine that echoes
In the recesses of our mind.
And the perceived discrepancy
Between the remnant and the Real
Of our lives that creates in us
A fear that we have fallen short,
That we lack that something central;
Yes, it’s the instinct of happiness
That makes us unhappy.
It acts like a persistent knocking,
Or a gnawing, on the closure
And confinement of our lives.
And so distractions are employed
In order to drown the reminder
To the fact there is more to Life.
Ha! Heresy, you will say!
There’s no more than experience!
But it was always thought so…
Poetry and philosophy,
Dreams and day dreams, and religion,
In literature all joined forces
To keep the new Orthodoxy at bay.
Of course, the Real will choose its ground
To fight on – that of Experience
And so the mind will be distracted
By some stimulus or other
In order to be occupied -
To keep it passive not active.
We become too busy to think,
And no longer trust our thoughts.
With each restless moment we flee
To distractions that promise
To comfort, but never do.
But the hope of happiness
Always sounds and posits a choice;
To mitigate our misery,
Or to mitigate distractions…
And then turn inward and hearken
To that which humanizes.
For at day’s end resides the thought
That the Real itself's imagined.
 
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ChristopherColumbus

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Starbucks Game

Geun Hye

Noticed her come in swinging the loveliest hips. And a good age for me, a mature woman in her thirties. She seats herself nearby and proceeds to get busy on her laptop. No eye contact. I get back to what I'm doing, and then notice a bit later that she re-locates to the window seats. Aha, I think, he is my opportunity. I sit between her and another guy, a bit of a tight squeeze...ha ha. I say hello to the guy, to show how friendly I am, then nip the conversation in the bud. I then turn to her saying how busy she looks. Conversation flew from there. Lots of smiling, a little bit of Kino. and she is leaning in for more.

We talking for around thirty minutes, and then I let her get back to work on her laptop. Get the number, say goodbye, and make myself scarce. Text her an hour later, she replies, I reply, she replies. Have a solidish date organized in a couple of weeks time. A few more texts just before hand might be required to secure it.

So much easier than the bars for meeting the woman!!!

Have organized a double date tonight with a friend. Tomorrow night hit the bars.
 

ChristopherColumbus

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Apogee

Autumn rain has ruined the flowers
That stood so proud in the summer hours,
And my home-bearing track is now but mud
In the aftermath of vengeful floods.

Jealous they were, of fragile beauty -
To unchecked power they gave their duty.
With the picturesque now drowned complete,
Of the memory I’ll ever speak.
 
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ChristopherColumbus

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A successful double date last night with a couple of Chinese ladies [Emily and May]. We enjoyed dinner, then went on to drinks. Afterwards, it started raining, so we had to walk home given the difficulty of finding a cab. It was quite romantic really, each of us teaming up with one of the girls under our umbrella. Luckily, it was a warm evening. Today, I received a few texts from Emily which has to be a good sign of interest.
 
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