I've heard it every possible way. Girls constantly claim they like nice guys over jerks. I'll believe that when I see it. Lots of guys claim that girls love the jerks. I've seen that enough to know it's at least partially true, but those relationships are usually really f*cked up. I've also heard that girls are attracted to a guy who is a jerk to everyone but her. Okay, yeah. But here's something interesting: the girl who is attracted to a guy who is nice to everyone but her. I try not to be an ass to anyone who doesn't deserve it, but sometimes girls think that a dry, sarcastic attitude is "being mean." Oh well, deal with it. I don't treat any girl I'm attracted to like sh*t but I often act completely aloof about them, like they don't really matter that much. Often what will happen is that right when she thinks I'm this big assh*le someone will come up to us and thank me for some nice thing I've done. This floors the girls, and I love it. - First of all, she finds out something good about me without ME telling her. - Second, it totally goes against what she was thinking and shows her a totally different side of me she didn't expect, making me a mystery. - Third, it pisses her off, which is always fun. I may have read something on this site to this effect, but basically it makes her mad that you helped someone who was in a car accident and you mentor inner city kids, and yet you make fun of her, or forget her birthday or whatever. She's like, "So you're a nice guy but you aren't nice TO ME? Why the hell not?" She starts to think you don't like her. It drives her nuts. She becomes insecure (WHY DOESN'T HE LIKE ME?) and she overcompensates by being all over you. So here's what you do: start being nice to people. Don't let people walk on you, but go out of your way now and again to be nice to someone. Volunteer. I tutor elementary school kids and work with a family center (adoptions, family crisis, etc.). There's nothing that will get a girl's heartstrings than a little kid that you tutor coming up to you when they recognize you in public. ("That d*ck, he's so nice to that little kid but he tells me I've got guy feet.") When you get approached by one of your fans (it'll happen eventually), play it off as though it's nothing. If she mentions it, just kind of shrug and brush it aside. Watch how Bill Murray handles this situation toward the end of Groundhog Day ("I have no idea what they're talking about, those old ladies have been hitting on me all night, etc.") Doing the nice things for other people really will make you feel good about yourself. I know a lot of guys here aspire to be the biggest asses they can possibly be, and that's their perogative I suppose. But if you do it like it isn't a big deal, people will talk about it. And eventually, the girl you're after will hear about it. She'll be impressed by your compassion, sensitivity, and mystery... and she'll be baffled, intrigued, and attracted by the fact that the guy she thought was a bit of a bast*rd is actually a great guy.