Recently Separated...Been Out Of The Game

[MP63]

So I'm 54 years old. But feel (and think I look) 35. I'm extremely fit. Above average looking. I dress like I'm 35 as well. I'm recently separated. Kids are out house. I'm in a nice apartment. I'm successful in business as well. I'm an entrepreneur. So what's my problem you ask? As confident as I am, I'm not assertive in talking with women...even in "my world" of the gym. The divorce looks like it's going to go through. One thing...most women run when they hear you're separated and not divorced. I'm not looking to **** a bunch of women. Not looking to date 5 girls at once. Just need some advice on where to meet them, and how to get it started. Been out of the game for a LONG time!

I would prefer a fitness-minded woman in her early 40's, but unfortunately kids come along with that and I am DONE with kids. Do not want to raise (and support) someone else's kids. Sorry.

 

[highSpeed]

Tough one man, tough one. I think at your age, I'm 43, is going to be tough to bag early 20s. Perhaps late 20s but that's still a stretch. So 30s is probably where you'd most likely start. You're going to run into a lot of chicks who have kids at that age and above. I suppose you could be honest about what your expectations are but that's only going to get you the a*hole label with most women. I think to some degree, you're going to have to put up with women who have kids. Perhaps you date them, have fun with them and wait until the kids are out of the house. You could try the early 20s route but I feel like most chicks that age are only going to see you as a sugar daddy. Fine if you only want to bang them but not that great if you want something serious.

 

[wifehunter]

You don't need to be assertive if women are chasing you. Learn how 'attraction' works.

 

[MP63]

You don't need to be assertive if women are chasing you. Learn how 'attraction' works.

That's why I signed up for this forum. Due tell

 

[MP63]

Tough one man, tough one. I think at your age, I'm 43, is going to be tough to bag early 20s. Perhaps late 20s but that's still a stretch. So 30s is probably where you'd most likely start. You're going to run into a lot of chicks who have kids at that age and above. I suppose you could be honest about what your expectations are but that's only going to get you the a*hole label with most women. I think to some degree, you're going to have to put up with women who have kids. Perhaps you date them, have fun with them and wait until the kids are out of the house. You could try the early 20s route but I feel like most chicks that age are only going to see you as a sugar daddy. Fine if you only want to bang them but not that great if you want something serious.

Like I said, I'm good with early 40's, but fit and attractive. My daughter is 19, so 20's is not in my mind. Nor really is 30's. They'll just want money, and I do not want to be a sugar daddy!

 

[AJ84]

OP you haven't even begun dating yet and are already disqualifying young women and women closer to your own age. Not a good way to start.

Keep an open mind and just get out there and date, weed them out based on your interactions with them rather than assumptions.

 

[highSpeed]

Like I said, I'm good with early 40's, but fit and attractive. My daughter is 19, so 20's is not in my mind. Nor really is 30's. They'll just want money, and I do not want to be a sugar daddy!

I'm not sure that 40s will be a whole lot different. You're looking for the undiscovered gem, those are tough to find.

 

[wifehunter]

I'm not sure that 40s will be a whole lot different. You're looking for the undiscovered gem, those are tough to find.

Yep, I may end up at 80, until then.

Can you imagine an 80yo with an 18yo!

Take that, feminists!!!

 

[AJ84]

Yep, I may end up at 80, until then.

Can you imagine an 80yo with an 18yo!

Take that, feminists!!!

Lol, I don't think feminists will care because they're not interested in 80yr old men anyway lol.

 

[wifehunter]

Lol, I don't think feminists will care because they're not interested in 80yr old men anyway lol.

Sorry...I meant 'Feminazis'.

They want to castrate all men.

 

[wifehunter]

That's why I signed up for this forum. Due tell

1. Challenge - be Mr. Impossible
2. Confidence - communcate humor and converse openly with total strangers.
3. Posture - Head up, back straight
4. Humor - be fun and playful
5. Attire - dress appropriately
6. Scarcity - sell yourself like a drug, the drug that makes people feel good from having fun.

Be awesome, be gone.

Works for me.

 

[Spaz]

OP you haven't even begun dating yet and are already disqualifying young women and women closer to your own age. Not a good way to start.

Keep an open mind and just get out there and date, weed them out based on your interactions with them rather than assumptions.

I'll go with AJ on this one.

Just play the field and find someone that makes you happy, comfortable.

 

[BeExcellent]

Keep an open mind and just get out there and date, weed them out based on your interactions with them rather than assumptions.

The above is solid advice. Don't have the attitude of "OK Boys....I'm on the prowl!!" rather just be cool and conversational and interact with women as people first and women second. Otherwise you are going to come off as horn dog Johnny and that vibe will be off putting to the better quality of women. Put yourself in target rich environments and socialize. That will go a long way toward your success.

 

[MrWood]

when you score that coffee or a quick beer date with the hot HB9 22yo you will know your doing ok.
Even if its only the date and nothing else.

At 50yo it was a real inspiration that I still got charm and game to light up a young girl like that... you can too OP!

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Like I said, I'm good with early 40's, but fit and attractive. My daughter is 19, so 20's is not in my mind. Nor really is 30's. They'll just want money, and I do not want to be a sugar daddy!

Yep, no you do not. Sugar daddy game has evolved in the last 15 years too . There's no guarantee you'll get "sugar" from her .

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

So I'm 54 years old. But feel (and think I look) 35. I'm extremely fit. Above average looking. I dress like I'm 35 as well. I'm recently separated. Kids are out house. I'm in a nice apartment. I'm successful in business as well. I'm an entrepreneur. So what's my problem you ask? As confident as I am, I'm not assertive in talking with women...even in "my world" of the gym. The divorce looks like it's going to go through. One thing...most women run when they hear you're separated and not divorced. I'm not looking to **** a bunch of women. Not looking to date 5 girls at once. Just need some advice on where to meet them, and how to get it started. Been out of the game for a LONG time!

I would prefer a fitness-minded woman in her early 40's, but unfortunately kids come along with that and I am DONE with kids. Do not want to raise (and support) someone else's kids. Sorry.

Check out the meet up groups in your area. There are usually groups that do outdoor activities. Also check out the dance meet ups. Women love to dance. And a man who can dance has an advantage in attracting women.

Reconsider your stance on not wanting to date several women at the same time (known as spinning plates). It will accelerate your learning curve, help you develop confidence, and provide you with an attitude of abundance.

You state that you are confident, yet you are not “assertive” in talking with women. Something is obviously missing there. The only way to really get over that is to just start approaching. Sometimes you’ll get blown off, sometimes you won’t. Work on developing a ZFG (zero fvcks given) attitude regarding whether or not your approaches work. You’ll eventually learn and get better.

-Augustus-

 

[speed dawg]

So I'm 54 years old. But feel (and think I look) 35. I'm extremely fit. Above average looking. I dress like I'm 35 as well. I'm recently separated. Kids are out house. I'm in a nice apartment. I'm successful in business as well. I'm an entrepreneur. So what's my problem you ask? As confident as I am, I'm not assertive in talking with women...even in "my world" of the gym. The divorce looks like it's going to go through. One thing...most women run when they hear you're separated and not divorced. I'm not looking to **** a bunch of women. Not looking to date 5 girls at once. Just need some advice on where to meet them, and how to get it started. Been out of the game for a LONG time!

So you have money, you're confident, you're in shape. Why did you get divorced in the first place? Need more details here. I'd guess you have an inner game problem, probably pretty blue pill. Don't worry though, we'll help you out. Give a run down of your marriage and your upbringing.

I would prefer a fitness-minded woman in her early 40's, but unfortunately kids come along with that and I am DONE with kids. Do not want to raise (and support) someone else's kids. Sorry.

I'd say you need to be looking for a woman that is done with kids as well (or has never had them and never wants to have them). You'll be in the same type of 'world'.

Just like we tell anyone, I'd start by reading the DJ Bible.

 

[The Duke]

I'd work on developing connections with women thru a social circle. It takes some time to develop the connections, but it's been the easiest environment for me to attract women. I'm just my cool self, converse with everybody, participate in their activities, and let the girls come to me. I've pulled 4 of them that way in the past year or so. In all 4 cases they have pursued me.

-Definitely don't share much about your divorce. Be vague about the details. Women will automatically disqualify you if they "feel" your divorce is too recent. They tend to project their own feelings and inability to put past relationships behind them and think men have the same issue.

 

[AJ84]

I'd work on developing connections with women thru a social circle. It takes some time to develop the connections, but it's been the easiest environment for me to attract women. I'm just my cool self, converse with everybody, participate in their activities, and let the girls come to me. I've pulled 4 of them that way in the past year or so. In all 4 cases they have pursued me.

-Definitely don't share much about your divorce. Be vague about the details. Women will automatically disqualify you if they "feel" your divorce is too recent. They tend to project their own feelings and inability to put past relationships behind them and think men have the same issue.

Men absolutely have the same issue lol! several posts on this thread reflect the inability to leave past relationships in the past and not project those feelings into a new relationship. The BPD threads alone lol!

We all do this from time to time.

But he should not be looking for a relationship anyway at least at this point. Be free. For sure be vague about the divorce, for dating it's really none of their business anyway and if he gets grilled by her around that then it shows she is angling for something

Just keep it light and breezy, chill and fun with more than one woman and see where that goes. For him women should be a happy distraction from divorce and a foundation from which to move on with his life.

 

[highSpeed]

Yep, I may end up at 80, until then.

Can you imagine an 80yo with an 18yo!

Take that, feminists!!!

Wouldn't that be awesome??? To rub the "feminists" (read third wave feminism, which is anything but about true feminism. I'd say more butchists) noses in it, to see you with that piece of arm candy and hear the "she's only with him for his wallet" lines? I mean who cares, she's with you right? Show me any guy whose wife is truly with him for him and him alone and I'll show you the true unicorn. How many women you know are going to stick around when you've got nothing left? Yep, you guessed it, not many.