It seems in the modern world they are the only way to meet anyone. Women are far less approachable in the real world and when they go out it tends to be to spend time with their girlfriends (brunches, girls nights out, gym classes etc) rather than to meet men.
I am not movie star good looking. But I am a decent looking guy in his late 30s (I look younger so tend to put my age as 35 to get around age filters My photos are decent and I took a lot of time to select them and asked the opinion of friends and family. I have a good job and some cool interests which give women potential conversation starters. But it is still a pretty joyless struggle.
Generally if I swipe right on a few hundred women I will get a couple dozen matches. Maybe half of these will be attractive the other half average (I am convinced that the apps match you with women you didn't swipe right on). While it is a pretty poor percentage rate I gather a lot of men hardly get any matches at all let alone with attractive women.
But I quickly discovered matches mean very little. To the extent matches message you it will generally be generic conversation starters, generic questions about my photos or interests, and generally little work with and a lot of the time after a few messages they just stop replying and I have had limited success trying to restart conversations. So unless something really resonates with them from my profile or they really like my photos it generally goes nowhere.
And of course the design features encourage flaky ADHD behaviour. Every girl and her friends know how to take good photos. So even average looking girls with make up/filters/the right lighting/the right angles/flattering clothing can look attractive and get hundreds of matches. they also put little work into the content of their profiles giving you little to work with in terms of asking questions etc. And most men out of laziness or frustration just play a numbers game swiping right on as many photos as they can.
Generally the women on these apps also seem to be very picky, narcissistic, entitled, demanding and it quickly becomes apparent they have been single for years and are serial daters. The rare ones that seem genuine and normal are usually either average looking or boring.
The whole thing is frustrating especially as I am over serial dating and hook ups and would like a meaningful relationship.
Do any guys have any good tips?
I am not movie star good looking. But I am a decent looking guy in his late 30s (I look younger so tend to put my age as 35 to get around age filters My photos are decent and I took a lot of time to select them and asked the opinion of friends and family. I have a good job and some cool interests which give women potential conversation starters. But it is still a pretty joyless struggle.
Generally if I swipe right on a few hundred women I will get a couple dozen matches. Maybe half of these will be attractive the other half average (I am convinced that the apps match you with women you didn't swipe right on). While it is a pretty poor percentage rate I gather a lot of men hardly get any matches at all let alone with attractive women.
But I quickly discovered matches mean very little. To the extent matches message you it will generally be generic conversation starters, generic questions about my photos or interests, and generally little work with and a lot of the time after a few messages they just stop replying and I have had limited success trying to restart conversations. So unless something really resonates with them from my profile or they really like my photos it generally goes nowhere.
And of course the design features encourage flaky ADHD behaviour. Every girl and her friends know how to take good photos. So even average looking girls with make up/filters/the right lighting/the right angles/flattering clothing can look attractive and get hundreds of matches. they also put little work into the content of their profiles giving you little to work with in terms of asking questions etc. And most men out of laziness or frustration just play a numbers game swiping right on as many photos as they can.
Generally the women on these apps also seem to be very picky, narcissistic, entitled, demanding and it quickly becomes apparent they have been single for years and are serial daters. The rare ones that seem genuine and normal are usually either average looking or boring.
The whole thing is frustrating especially as I am over serial dating and hook ups and would like a meaningful relationship.
Do any guys have any good tips?
