If you aren't going forward, you are giong backwards

[betheman]

I think BB is not mad that people disagreed with him. He is frustrated that they are all just as complacent as Mr. Ruby Tuesday shift manager, who by the way probably is making closer to $40,000 a year not $70,000. He is just a floor manager, which is nothing. The waiters probably make more than he does.

He is frustrated at all the thumb twiddlers on her who complain about women who aren't better than they think women should be, but don't do sh!t as a man to better themselves. He also made a realization in that frustration about himself, which he communicated here, pretty harshly but honestly.

He's on a Pook/Fingz level in real life with his achievements, and while it feels good to come here and try to provide some insight to people who aren't there yet (and quite frankly will never be), the back patting and idolization has helped him become stagnant in his own goals. No one here is really in his league, no one here is exactly his peer.

It's one thing to help another man up, and another thing to just hang out at those lower levels all of the time. You absorb from the mentality around you.

One of my favorite quotes: "Travel only with thy equals or thy betters; if there are none, travel alone." - The Dhammapada

What a load of Bull!

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Awww man, Backbreaker spitting some good game as usual.

I'd like to add one thing.

You control your life!!!!

Don't blame a girl because she left you. Don't claim she is a bpd or a cheater. Don't blame the world because you can't get a job. Don't blame anyone because your car breaks down. Don't blame your teacher for failing the test. Don't blame your parents for your mishap.

It's your fault!!! Nobodies fault but yourselves. You could drive a Porsche if you wanted too. You can own a condo if you wanted too. You can have a dime piece broad on your arms. You control your life!! Make sure you make wise decisions. Make sure to always upgrade yourselves.

Never be complacent. Life can always be better.

 

[hithard]

BB first post is a great sum up of the dangers of being complacent. As a man, having goals no matter how small stops us drifting into the humdrum of routine. Breaking down BB's post is in reality a wealth of information for anyone's relationship / or for stealing another guys girl (not that I recommend it).
And it’s as simple as break routine. As a guy finding the quickest, easiest and most productive way of doing things can sometimes spill over into all areas of my life. Doing this while you have no forward propulsion in improving yourself often leads to a rut like existence, which is ok for short stints. But don't wallow in there for years as it's a waste of life.
Guys tend to think
-if I'm loyal
-pay the bills
-work hard
That this should be enough to keep a woman interested (if you were going out with another guy it probably would be). But the fact is it isn't enough no matter how much we might biatch and moan about it. Women are emotion junkies. Reliability don't cut it

So not only do we need to have goals for ourselves we should also bring our partners along for the ride when possible (in areas that they have a common interest) to cement those feelings of moving ahead and making progress to us. So long as you are breaking up the monotony of the relationship by doing something new breaks up the ditz factor when they start a new job, hobby, lifestyle.

the girl, worked at the horse track with my wife but she like my wife gave it up, it's hard work and it's demanding work and it's not meant for women over the age of 25. she just gave it up a few months ago and she got this job as a receptionist at this office, and she has become, and without the guys Knowles she has become very crazy about a guy who works there at her office. i don't even know what the fvck he does but from what i understand he is good but not great looking, but he is very cool and from what i understand, makes very good money. drives a beamer, dresses like an adult is supposed to dress, carries himself like a man who is going somewhere.

Right there in bold is where it ended for him. She got a new job which stirs all those emotions of excitement, which if have been dormant for too long because you are a rutaholic gets amplified. If a woman moves ahead they are more susceptible to advances from men as it's out with the old in with the new mentality and it's the best time to strike from a guy’s point of view. The BF is simply put into the old life file as someone new and exciting comes along.
I don't give a fluck what the waiter guy makes, whether what she did was right or wrong- just that this is why the majority of breakups happen and guys are often clueless as to what happened.


This

he confronts her and he is crying about how you could do this to me i thought you loved me. she doesn't even blink and tells him she doesn't want to date him anymore and tells him that she will have her stuff out of his place by the end of the week.

Hits guys hard and they wonder why the chick isn't even shedding a tear. Mainly because it was over as soon as she hit her new lifestyle and left you behind.
As soon as something breaks the routine anyone's relationship can go through that danger period. It's something you should be aware of whenever your partner makes a lifestyle shift. On the flip side it's the best time to strike at that good looking taken girl who has just taking up a class in whatever as imo your chances are double in the first few weeks. Breaking routine and making her feel like she is moving forward is an easy way to the lay.

 

[disgustipated]

Coming from an poor background, then being placed in a suburban well off school I developed a distaste for those people who looked down on those with even a smidgen less than them. To this day I cringe when I have to revisit that place or places like it.

I take comfort in the fact that these same people, some on this forum, are being looked down upon as scum by the same type of people, only on a higher "level".

 

[Die Hard]

Backbreaker, I feel you've been coming to this forum to validate yourself.

You don't need to! Just be content with yourself, your life, what you have achieved and what you do from day to day.

It's lonely at the top!! So it's tempting to drop down a level or two and join in with the guys who are just below the top, so you don't have to feel so alone and can enjoy some company. But if you feel the disparage is too big, then it's okay to take a step away from them...


Keva Rosenberg from Robocop got it right:

"It's a free society...except there ain't nothing free...gives us no guarantees, you're on your own. It's the law of the jungle."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ID80fUT5SwQ

 

[disgustipated]

Now he's a waiter. Some of you are elitist trash. It's one thing to accept the rules of the game when it comes to women but to trash your fellow brother in a downtime using the same idealogy that women use in valuing or devaluing us is disheartening and sickening.

 

[hithard]

Now he's a waiter. Some of you are elitist trash. It's one thing to accept the rules of the game when it comes to women but to trash your fellow brother in a downtime using the same idealogy that women use in valuing or devaluing us is disheartening and sickening.

I don't care if he picks $hit out of other peoples shoes for a living what he does isn't important. Stop getting butthurt over perceived class warfare. Honestly if you take things as attacks instead of seeing the game at play you have the wrong mindset. I feel empathy for those in situations but if you are too dumb to learn from mistakes and grow from the situation then you get what you deserve.

 

[Jitterbug]

Leave it to iqqi, the royal gypsy bum who wasted her twenties bumming around the country with no sense of purpose and accomplishment, to lecture all of us plebs on how to succeed in life.

 

[DonJuanabe]

he confronts her and he is crying about how you could do this to me i thought you loved me. she doesn't even blink and tells him she doesn't want to date him anymore and tells him that she will have her stuff out of his place by the end of the week.

Wow. The last time I spoke with my last oneitis girl I told her that we should get back together. I didn't ask her, I didn't plead, I didn't beg, I *told* her. She said no. We talked, argued, asked questions for a short while and I realized no matter how much sense I made nothing was going to change. Here is our conversation goodbye, very much like what BB posted:

Me: If that's how you feel and you're dating someone then it would be inappropriate for me to call you again.

Her: Yes, it would be.

Me: Alright, I will not call you again.

Her: I know you won't.

Me: Promise me you'll take care of yourself, be well.

Her: I will.

Me: Bye. [click]

Notice how cold the girls are in either situation. Once they have feelings for another guy (i.e. getting f*cked) you are NOTHING to them. Women feel in the present while men are able to feel -- through logical analysis -- in the past, present, and future.

 

[Jitterbug]

Earlier in this thread, I mentioned my female friend who cheated on her boyfriend with a bum student. Her boyfriend was exactly what Young Juan said: on his way to open his own fancy restaurant, while he's managing one. Problem? He was too busy busting his arse to spend time with her!

Guys like Young Juan are still forgetting the #1 DJ rule: watch what women do, not what they say. What those women say to why they lost attraction to their guy is entirely backward rationalisation. You can't trust that information. You can observe them and conclude why the guy was toasted, but you can't draw any conclusion just from what they tell you.

 

[hithard]

Not all women are like this but most are...its latent psychopathy, an ability to shut off the conscience.

I've actually never dated a woman that was not like this but I'm assuming there are some quality women that are not like this, lol.

They simply get over you while they are still with you. There is usually a conscious decision that it's done a few months before the surprise split.

Too clarify, the real problem was that she's a slvt and got bored

The problem is the majority of women would behave in similar fashion. Boredom and routine to women is what nagging and no sex is to us.

 

[Burroughs]

@royalflush thanks man appreciate it

I am a firm believer that the age of the 'relationship' is over....we are in the era of the pump and dump, cvm on the girls face and get the hell out... if you marry a girl in this day and age you are a moron and you will see what the teeth of government feels like in due time

obviously many men have not got the memo.

backbreaker among them, notice how his anger reached the boiling point when we asked him to put himself in the place of the man (his social friend no less) that he was mocking....he became a blithering enraged person.

If backbreaker couldn't hurl stones at his perceived 'social inferior' then what is to stop backbreaker himself from oneday falling into the same circumstance.

and that is the crux of the matter, domesticated, socialized married men need to convince themselves at all costs that they haven't made a heinous mistake...so they shame and mock other men who cannot 'support a wife' or in this case a long term girl friend and call it progress.....believing that another man's failure is your success...foolish lol

they use analogies elevating themselves...i have a BMW and I started a business blah blah blah...none of it matters a bit when your women decides she is done..whether rich or poor..but if you're married the law will be on her side every time especially if you have kids

If the day comes when backbreakers wife decided to cheat on him and leave him for a richer man there is not a thing backbreaker can do about it ...he would be helpless in front of law and society.

the fear that backbreaker felt was one day it could very well happen to him.

and this enraged him so much he had to rattle off his list of accomplishments and accolades.

classic denial

 

[DonJuanabe]

They simply get over you while they are still with you. There is usually a conscious decision that it's done a few months before the surprise split.

It's more than that. In my case we had been broken up for a month and a half when I last spoke with her. You can be "over" someone but still be friendly, kind, or compassionate. These girls (and apparently most women) were not just lacking in these categories, they were stone cold, like they were talking to the sidewalk rather than a human being who cared about them. I think part of it comes from loyalty to the current feelings they have for the c*ck they're getting.

 

[Jitterbug]

Too clarify, the real problem was that she's a slvt and got bored.

Of course.

What I wrote was her backward rationalisation. He was ambitious and successful - supposedly the opposite of our guy in this story. She was hanging out with us and having a great time *without him*. We're a much more exciting bunch. She lost her attraction for him.

Being ambitious and successful might be a great thing to you personally, but it is no guarantee to keep a woman around. If she's no longer attracted to you, not only it will not help you, it will even work against you. "Haaaalf!!!" - as Eddie Murphy said.

 

[hithard]

Being ambitious and successful might be a great thing to you personally, but it is no guarantee to keep a woman around. If she's no longer attracted to you, not only it will not help you, it will even work against you. "Haaaalf!!!" - as Eddie Murphy said.

In my opinion if they don't get some of the buzz and feel you are both progressing along together then yes the above is true.

I am a firm believer that the age of the 'relationship' is over....we are in the era of the pump and dump, cvm on the girls face and get the hell out... if you marry a girl in this day and age you are a moron and you will see what the teeth of government feels like in due time

amen to that.

 

[cordoncordon]

Leave it to iqqi, the royal gypsy bum who wasted her twenties bumming around the country with no sense of purpose and accomplishment, to lecture all of us plebs on how to succeed in life.

I forgot about that one. I know I have heard enough from other Iqqi stories that I am beyond flabbergasted that she has taken the stance she has regarding this guy. She seems to be doing better now, but I'm sure she wouldn't have taken to kindly to some people talking about the way she used to live...IE living and sleeping in a van for example.

 

[cordoncordon]

Too clarify, the real problem was that she's a slvt and got bored.

Bingo, end of the fvcking discussion.

 

[iqqi]

I forgot about that one. I know I have heard enough from other Iqqi stories that I am beyond flabbergasted that she has taken the stance she has regarding this guy. She seems to be doing better now, but I'm sure she wouldn't have taken to kindly to some people talking about the way she used to live...IE living and sleeping in a van for example.

When you say "some people" you are talking about yourself, I don't really see anyone else bringing it up over and over again. But then again you have always been obsessed. You have more issues than BB, that is why he doesn't want to hang out with you in real life.

You keep bringing up a period of time in my life that lasted about one month, do you want to talk about it or something? I've already said that it was a purposeful catalyst for me that resulted in success... not all of us have significant others that get jobs across the country making over 100k, and then leech off of her, cheat on her, and make a mockery of ourselves, CC.

And how are you criticizing this chick in the OP when you did the same thing, but kind of worse actually? Keep in mind I have not even had an opinion on her or the OP, only BB's exit. Let's stay on topic, lol.

 

[cordoncordon]

When you say "some people" you are talking about yourself, I don't really see anyone else bringing it up over and over again. But then again you have always been obsessed. You have more issues than BB, that is why he doesn't want to hang out with you in real life.

You keep bringing up a period of time in my life that lasted about one month, do you want to talk about it or something? I've already said that it was a purposeful catalyst for me that resulted in success... not all of us have significant others that get jobs across the country making over 100k, and then leech off of her, cheat on her, and make a mockery of ourselves, CC.

And how are you criticizing this chick in the OP when you did the same thing, but kind of worse actually? Keep in mind I have not even had an opinion on her or the OP, only BB's exit. Let's stay on topic, lol.

IQQI you have a long list of examples in how you used to live...poor, white girl living with a black family in the ghetto, no jobs, driving a beat up old van, drinking/drugs, leaving home to run off with some circus performer and live like a gypsy...just to name a few, that you should never ever ever downgrade or disparage how someone else lives. Im really surprised that you of all people are the one criticizing the guy...especially when he has a very decent job. When you met your current bf in Chicago you were living out of a van and had no job.....according to your logic, he should never have dated you because you were "beneath him". But he dated you because he liked you as a person. Not your job or your bank account or what you drove.

Just because you have had a little success now, when you are what..in your 30's? That does not make you The Queen of England that can pass judgement on her subjects.

Like I said and have always said about you, you are a drama queen to the extreme, which is why you showed up here and said the opposite of what most are saying. Life that boring these days that you need to resort to your old ways to get a thrill?

 

[Atom Smasher]

He is overly sensitive and if he doesn't get his way at times he takes his ball and goes home. Which tells me he at times is here more for the idolization rather than truly helping guys out. I think he starts out doing that, but then as his fan club grows he gets more and more into it. Then someone disagrees with him and he goes bye bye again.

Normally I just let hissy-fit guys fade into the sunset to lick their wounds, but since BB has declared what losers he thinks we are, I feel justified in adding my opinion here.

BB's problem is that he says too much in his posts. He would be better off stating his purpose succinctly, waiting for others to respond, and then adding more. As it is he shoots his entire load at once with over-editorializing, thereby making his points thin and opening himself up for people to reply with differing perspectives, hence making him feel he has his reputation to defend.

It's definitely not cool to slam one's peers and then go storming off, but that's just what some people do when pressured or challenged.