Have been dating a single mother... my story..

[Tenacity]

I'm in BOLD

Ok guys, so I have been off of this board for about 4 months now because I started dating an incredibly beautiful single mother. I'll try to make it short.

PROS:
She likes to fvck so much that I can't keep up. This is a good thing because it is always available when ever I want it. She literally will do what ever I want, like seriously, everything . It is pretty awesome. Never had better sex, ever.

She cooks me dinner every night and cleans up my place and hers. Really clean is nice as the lazy ex never cleaned even though she chose not to work.

So far she has been really easy to get along with, I knew her in high school and dated her then and she is still the exact same, so that is a plus. If she didn't have the 2 little ones then I would definitely keep her long term, no marriage, but as long as it could last.

These are very low level PROs, when I say low level these are things that ANY girl with at least mild interest is going to provide for you in the early stages of the relationship. The sex will be more frequent, her attitude is usually great and she might do things to help you out here and there such as the cooking, cleaning, etc. This usually would drop off as you go further into the relationship but even if it doesn't, it's still nothing special to where this chick should be labeled as special.

CONS:

She has a crazy manipulative ex husband. And they are going through the custody process for the kids. Considering he is going to be involved in the kids life for the rest of their life, I DO NOT want to take the 3rd wheel role of the step father who has no disciplinary authority, especially in this time and age where allegations of anything will get you put in jail. Don't need that **** in my life

How do you know SHE'S not the crazy and manipulative one? Why are they getting a divorce? And of course you would be the 3rd wheel unless the chick manages to screw another Father out of being able to see his kids that often, then you will take on the "New Father" role.

Her kids. I already touched on this, but damn, being around 2 loud, crying, obnoxious noise machines that sleep probably 1 hour total a night is not something I can do anymore, especially since they are not my kids. I get along with them fine, but tiny tots still in diapers are bi-polar as hell, one minute you are the best thing ever, the next minute they hate that you took the toy they gave you to play with and cry bloody murder, lol.


Sooo... I think I am done, which really sucks because she is by far the best woman I have met. But, I can't imagine raising another 2 kids ever. I thought I would give it a try and see since I have been there and have done that, nope, it aint happening. I would rather be single and alone then to deal with 2 little kids again.

It's funny that just because a chick gave you some a.ss and cooked for you, that you get THIS pvssy-whipped into being willing to take on the "New Father" role? Don't you think that's a little overboard? The kids have a Father, and unless the guy is REALLY this bad person she is trying to make him out to be, he's the one that should be Fathering his kids. Were you thinking of moving in with this chick and her kids or something?

Please chime in if you guys have similair stories. It's too bad because I really like this girl, but the baggage is real, thought I could carry it but it's wearing me down.

I know what you mean, mostly EVERY chick I meet has baggage, either in the form of kids already or the chick is just NOT managing her weight properly or the chick has BAD finances. It's like there's always something big and glaringly wrong with every chick you meet (at least for me anyway) which is why I settled in that it's best I just date and do relationships only, and not marry, make kids nor do any cohabitation.

Be careful though about considering becoming someone's Step Father. If you and the chick were to break up she might be able to argue that you pay child support for kids that aren't even yours.

 

[latinnova]

Thanks for your replies, and as you guys said there are a lot of con's, and this blends in when I said in my first post "I am done with the relationship" . Who said I was moving in with her? I sure as hell never did. Again, just stating what my experience was. That's funny how you guys hammer me about it by simply regurgetating what I already said. Anyhow, I got some great ***** out of the relationship, it was fun while it lasted, and its time to move onto what ever is next. I will continue to post my future experiences and you guys feel free to comment and necessary.

 

[Sik]

Latinnova,

I think you're getting a decent deal, overall. I'm seeing a single mother of two myself, but only about once per month. Her kids are like 4-5 yrs old, one is OK, the other has issues. For our 'dates' she gets a sitter and then she comes over to Pound Town. Sometimes we get dinner first, but not always.

It's a train made of vagina, you may as well ride it until it's off the rails.

Maybe I'm just a really optimistic guy and I don't see all the negativity some posters have. Hell, I've been pounding this broad out for about two years now! This is while I'm having plenty of other broads in between "dates!" I'm having a blast!

Now, I rarely play with the kids but I have before. I'll even pay for the sitter just so I can do my deep-well exploration on her ass for the night. Whatever it takes, man. Enjoy the ride!

 

[MOTU]

Sorry I missed this for so long...

LatinNova, my GF of almost 10 months has 2 young kids and mine are grown, let me share some thoughts.

First, the warnings above are all somewhat valid. There is definitely some drawbacks to dating a woman with kids. I think you have to be objective, move slow and make sure you really know what you are getting into if you turn it into a long term thing. Don't compromise; if the kid thing drags you down, move on.

You also have to be clear about your role in her life and in her kid's lives. Really put some thought into this, not just for now but also think about the future if your relationship progresses. And talk explicitly with her about your expectations. Don't leave this unspoken - that's a recipe for disaster.

In my case, I have been married 2x and wife 2 had no kids and was a stepmom to mine when they were teenagers. GF's first husband had kids when she married him. So we both have experience with step parenting and have talked about how we see the role of the step parent (though not in the context of her and I getting married or something).

I also think you have to go really slow. It kind of worries me that you are spending the night around her kids so fast. I didn't even meet my GF's kids until we had been dating for three months or more. And they didn't spend the night at my house until after six months. I never stay at her house. And I only see her kids 3-4x per month.

Anyway, I think you take single mom relationships super slowly, for the sake of the kids at least. If you are going to be around those kids long term, you need to develop your own relationship with them on your own terms.

Ok guys, so I have been off of this board for about 4 months now because I started dating an incredibly beautiful single mother. I'll try to make it short.

PROS:
She likes to fvck so much that I can't keep up. This is a good thing because it is always available when ever I want it. She literally will do what ever I want, like seriously, everything . It is pretty awesome. Never had better sex, ever.

She cooks me dinner every night and cleans up my place and hers. Really clean is nice as the lazy ex never cleaned even though she chose not to work.

So far she has been really easy to get along with, I knew her in high school and dated her then and she is still the exact same, so that is a plus. If she didn't have the 2 little ones then I would definitely keep her long term, no marriage, but as long as it could last.

CONS:

She has a crazy manipulative ex husband. And they are going through the custody process for the kids. Considering he is going to be involved in the kids life for the rest of their life, I DO NOT want to take the 3rd wheel role of the step father who has no disciplinary authority, especially in this time and age where allegations of anything will get you put in jail. Don't need that **** in my life

Her kids. I already touched on this, but damn, being around 2 loud, crying, obnoxious noise machines that sleep probably 1 hour total a night is not something I can do anymore, especially since they are not my kids. I get along with them fine, but tiny tots still in diapers are bi-polar as hell, one minute you are the best thing ever, the next minute they hate that you took the toy they gave you to play with and cry bloody murder, lol.


Sooo... I think I am done, which really sucks because she is by far the best woman I have met. But, I can't imagine raising another 2 kids ever. I thought I would give it a try and see since I have been there and have done that, nope, it aint happening. I would rather be single and alone then to deal with 2 little kids again.

Please chime in if you guys have similair stories. It's too bad because I really like this girl, but the baggage is real, thought I could carry it but it's wearing me down.

 

[Albatross953]

Glad you're back Latin, I remember your thread. You like her, she likes you so just keep hitting it. Don't worry so much about the kids or the ex. Let her do that heavy lifting.
what you should worry about is not getting serious with her, as mentioned above getting roped into support of any kind. And don't get her pregnant....

 

[ZTIME]

Ohhh Boy! I have way to much experience with these types of relationships! Way more than I should.

Consider it a great experience that you got to hook up with an old high school friend that is still hot and Fu**s like the devil. 4 months isn't too long of a period of time, and it sounds like you're already over it.

For future reference...A lot of the advice on the con's of this situation are pretty accurate.

Picture 1 year into a relationship with this girl when you run out of new stuff to talk about, and suddenly all of your conversations become a one way ***** session where she dumps all of her kid and ex problems on you.

Sex becomes an issue because she's too stressed and she's already got you roped into her world and doesn't need to put out as often.

The cooking and cleaning goes away due to lack of time and too much stress.

The worst part is that once she feels comfortable she'll start to physically let herself go. She no longer needs to keep herself fit and hot because she feels that she has already found the replacement dad for her kids, and the partner she needs for support. (she's forgetting of course that she is taking away everything you ever liked about her to begin with).

Now I'm sure that every guy says that this will never happen to them, or that their girl is nothing like that, but in my experience that's the way it happens.

Now, there will be lot's of guys that tell you to keep doing her and to enjoy the ride. The truth of the matter is that if you get free cheese from mouse traps, you're eventually going to get your finger snapped.

Enjoy moving on. There is a lot of fun and trouble out there to get into!

“People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.”

 

[MatureDJ]

You sound like overexcited teenager who got first BJ.

She doesnt fvck you royally :

because are amazing
because you blew her mind
because you seduced her
because you are sex-god
because you are better than other guys
...

But because she is single mom and she needs somebody to take the shytty job of rising not yours kids.She hopes you will be this employee and your payment is dinner and pvssy.Enjoy your sex but there is nothing amazing about it.There is no need to boast about it under disguise of 'sharing' experience.There is no magic.No secret.No game.Simple exchange of resources.Thats it.

BINGO! This is like boasting of shooting fish in a barrel - only you are shooting sp3rm, and might add to her brood, thereby making you want to settle down with her, being the dutiful beta male to her brood. I'd rather bang a single mommie pro.

 

[latinnova]

The posts after my last post were real informative, thanks for the insight guys, there was a lot of useful information there. I agree with all of them.

I set my parameters very early in the relationship. I explicitly explained that I am not the father to her kids and I would never expect her to think I am and I will walk at the first sign of her trying to get me to be daddy. I am not waking up with them, putting them to bed, cooking for them, baby sitting them nor ever providing for them, all caring and finances that deal with the kids are on her and her ex. However I don't mind saying hi to them and playing around with them for a quick second cause I don't have a problem with kids in general, but when the whining starts, I'm done in a quick second. If she did not agree with these parameters then I said that we should go ahead and go our separate ways to save ourselves time.

I also let her know that I was never going to get married again, no matter if she thinks she can manipulate me into doing so or think I am going to change, I made it clear that I am not. She knows clear as day that I mean I will walk the moment any of these things I mentioned happen. Its kind of like the dread game I guess, so she has been treating me like royalty and I will walk this road of the king for as long as it treats me well, and move on when it does not. This option of being able to walk out with no ramifications is incredible, a power that I did not have when I was married to the psychopath.

So to sum up I am getting the best pvssy ever, along with other pvssy on the side, though the other pvssy does not come close to this single moms. I am under no obligation to stay and can walk when ever I want. No draw back for me, so I will ride this wave until it crashes. Also, it is impossible for me to add to her brood, I'm snipped.

 

[Albatross953]

Does she know you're snipped? Brilliant idea for guys in our position.

 

[LiveFreeX]

I started dating an incredibly beautiful single mother

Run away screaming. :crackup:

 

[glass half full]

I've been doing the same thing as you. Everything is the same except her kids are older, way past diapers. And she only has them on weekends. The oldest two are 12 and 16. They are at the age of being fun to be around. I like teaching them stuff. The youngest is 8; she's tolerable, quiet, and mostly just watches princess movies. I never had kids, so I guess there is a novelty to it.

Any single mother who is smart is going to fvck your brains out. It's the best thing to do for the sake of her kids.

To my dear ex- Did you read this sh!t ? put up with her two total snots and hardly put out...hope karma catches you!

 

[Bible_Belt]

I dumped the single mom. After three kids, she had a vag like a weak handshake.

 

[greatsnake]

You sound like overexcited teenager who got first BJ.

She doesnt fvck you royally :

because are amazing
because you blew her mind
because you seduced her
because you are sex-god
because you are better than other guys
...

But because she is single mom and she needs somebody to take the shytty job of rising not yours kids.She hopes you will be this employee and your payment is dinner and pvssy.Enjoy your sex but there is nothing amazing about it.There is no need to boast about it under disguise of 'sharing' experience.There is no magic.No secret.No game.Simple exchange of resources.Thats it.

Damn, this is a reality check ...

 

[Milano]

My first girlfriend had a kid, most painful experience in my life. Its a great life lesson but single moms are the disease of this era and are pretty much dirty sluts noone respects, not even themselves. They are living in constant fear cause of all the rejections they are now experiencing relating to their kid and its affecting their confidence. In one way they know the kid is ruining their life, on the other hand the kid is all they love, what a horrible feeling.

Whereas before they could fuk the gym hero at school and even date him, now a guy like that would barely sleep with her once and gtfo. Her trick is to go down a few levels, meaning dropping the bad boy and looking for a provider. You have been selected to parent her lucky strike, as a man with dignity you should ofc accept the s3x and gtfo.

I see so many of them on tinder and it always makes me laugh when I think about how they must go down in quality if they want to hold on to a man, but many dont want to accept the cold hard reality lol. I find it funny because it reminds me of many of us in hear who used to have blue pill mentality and didnt know why we got nothing from women, women with kids are probably the closest thing to a miserable blue pill man we can get. Some justice restored by nature haha

 

[MatureDJ]

Haha, what is said above is true. Its a fvckfest of epic proportions.

Also, something else bothers me, a lot. The little boy is a spitting image of his father, its literally the closest thing I have seen to a mini me of anything. So every time I see the boy I just see the dad looking at me. I think its evolution kicking in and it just doesn't sit well with me at all, its a no go for ltr. Though I will see ho long this wave shall roll.

It is exactly evolution; it's your genes crying out to you to not waste your time & energy on some other man's genes.

 

[greatsnake]

2 months after breaking up with the single mom, I see things more objectively. Here are some things that I've realized:

- financial strain
- my freedom would have gone out the window
- the single mom while dating is fun, but as the relationship settles the reality is different.
- random outings wouldn't be a possibility
- things would have to be planned around the schedules of the kid
- dealing with someone else's drama
- everything is about scheduling
- sex wouldn't have been a priority.
- the routine would have killed me




all of this in exchange for sex .....


a lot more will pop up as time goes on, but the negatives outweigh the positives......

 

[YawataNoKami]

Single mothers are always in Walle Seeking Mode...........ALWAYS. You are her future wallet.

 

[BeExcellent]

I DO NOT want to take the 3rd wheel role of the step father who has no disciplinary authority

I can't imagine raising another 2 kids ever. I thought I would give it a try and see since I have been there and have done that, nope, it aint happening. I would rather be single and alone then to deal with 2 little kids again.

This isn't surprising. I wouldn't want to deal with someone's children either if they were that little. Hard enough dealing with your own. They mess diapers, barf, cry and scream at that age and they do NOT sleep and they do NOT mind. No thank you. So honestly this means she is NOT a cool chick because she does NOT meet your most basic criteria. So obviously you gave it a shot against your better judgement.

Here's the thing. When you find out someone does NOT meet your hard and fast criteria, you have to next the girl. She can't suddenly become childless again. She is forever stuck with the kid's father too as far as you know. Way too much drama to become ensnared in.

Once single parents have children who are older things are different/better. Children of any age are management intensive but it's far simpler when they are older and in school and have some of their own interests and activities (i.e. they are less dependent on the parents for everything). I honestly believe that single parents need to focus on being great parents first and not worry about the dating scene, especially if the children are very small. I'm totally with Dr. Laura on that one. I myself date, but I have no illusions about the fact that I'm a single parent, and that this is not something men without children want to deal with. I also have the ability (due to my professional endeavors) to have a social life that does not include my kids because it's in a different location entirely. I've never introduced any man I've been on a date with to my children, although they know I date. Their father has never introduced the children to anyone he dates either. We have an unofficial agreement that unless a relationship is quite serious that the children do not need to be exposed to people we date...and the people we date do not meet our kids. My ex husband feel exactly the way y'all do about someone else's children. No thanks.

The other thing is that if you have sufficient financial means you don't NEED someone else to take care of you and pick up the tab for yourself OR for the children. I get from what I read here that many, many women are indeed looking for a provider who isn't the father.

So you have to screen. If they have children already and you either don't want to raise the children, be involved in the raising of the children and/or the kids are of such an age where they are going to require too much time away from you so she can parent well (because you'd never want a woman who doesn't parent well either - what if she had your kid!!!), then you just really should move along.

Even if you want to just enjoy sex for a while, what is your goal? To tie up time you might otherwise use to come across someone better suited for you? Never waste time with something that can never go anywhere. Now if she's merely a plate and you are actively seeing other women or seeking other women, that's one thing...but just remember that if the sex is on tap and really good, you are likely to get attached in spite of yourself.

And then you end up posting a thread here

 

[Dr. Reed]

There has been a lot of discussion of the personal downside of dating a single mom. However there is a larger and more important issue: The negative impact on society.

Anyone interested in a deeper discussion of this problem, please read the first chapter of a book I am working on. Rational actor modeling explains perfectly why women do these things (Murray and others are a good source for this discussion).

For those of you who read my lengthy post about the marginalization of men should know that enabling single parent women contributes (and reflects) everything that is wrong with our society. Children of single parent "families" have much, much worse life outcomes. In terms of education, crime, earning, drug and alcohol addiction...it is a long list.

50% of marriages end in divorce, and the ability of a woman to find partners is glorified in our culture. That is part of the reason why 70% of divorces are filed by women. They know they will continue to collect the paycheck of the man she reproduced with. They will get the house. They also know that there will be many weak men that are more than happy to be with her. I call them men who raise other men's sperm.

Compounding this problem is the fact that these variables exacerbate the problem of unmarried women have children to begin with. We live in the "You go girl" dystopia created by the war on men. I am woman hear my roar, I don't need a man to have a baby, I do not need to be selective about who I open up my legs to. The welfare state will support me and the laws that protect me are massive and ubiquitous.

Before the modern welfare/man hating state, a woman would actually have to be intelligent, discerning, and selective in her sex choices. Furthermore, she would have to be a good wife and mother if she wanted to be successful. She had to be a descent kind, loving, and giving person. There were consequences if she treated her husband like ****.

To days, there are financial and cultural incentives. The rise of the baby momma state is just basic economics 101. There are a thousand reasons to treat your man like ****.

The consequences in the modern world are consequences for the man from the strong arm of the state.

As men, it is critical for us to put a stop to this. Yes, you can **** a woman who would have been far out of your league pre baby, but now you can make it with an 8.

The laws morals of our society will not change, even though this phenomena hurts our society, hurts men, hurts children, and in the long run hurts women. It hurts everyone, that is why you must stop enabling this insanity. Do not love and or enable these women.

 

[glass half full]

The above poster is correct, society is what started these problems. It won't get any better now, it is ingrained. Nobody cares anymore, that's the fact.
Make it with an 8 now? Doubt it....girls (I refuse to refer to them as "women") always know their sexual market value. They prop each other up. Digging gold with their similar friends is now their mission.

These girls have made themselves pump and dump material because they chose the bad boy first. Or, maybe they themselves are the bad girl...nobody thinks about that. If a man is not 6'4", a "10" and makes a six-figure income, he is a piece of ****.

The consequences are not just from the strong arm of the state, they are the result of fifty years of Feminism. They create their own problems, and over the years have cunningly found ways to blame men. Which robs the normal, good man of his dignity and his life ambition which results in a pump-and-dump necessity if a man is to enjoy sex, instead of in a marriage. I raised two boys whose father taught them at an early age that I am terrible...think about the man in the movie "Home Alone"...yes that's what living through their youth was like for me (but not quite that extreme...). Between them and my now ex-wife's "grrfriends", who chastised me because I was "low value", I had a stroke at 44yo.

I am a good looking 5'6 guy. she is 5'1. They convinced her she should be with a guy at least 5'10. This is a big ****ing deal nowadays to sluers like them. Never mind that one of them had no visible chest and another was overweight and past her prime. I wasn't perfect and I had to go. You can imagine how I feel about them, they are lucky I am not crazy. I have custody of my 16yo daughter, had to move in with my parents in order to pull that off in my State. I will never marry again, from now on "girls" are disposable toys.