Dating efficiency and cost management

[LJBFB]

So, I have dated about 10 women this month, and seen most of the ones I wanted multiple times. I was able to bed 3. I thought I had a couple more ready to jump on the team but $hit all seemed to fall apart quickly.includong losing my main plate and now just one consistent dtf. So now that I am almost starting over I want to improve. All else equal, I would prefer and do lean towards drinks. This with or with or without apps usually runs 40 to 80 bucks with the average girl not splitting bill. I make good money and can easily afford this, however doing this most days of the week is not conducive to current financial goals including student debt payoff. The advantages of drinks is that it is much easier to close ( kiss or f). Only one first date drinks converted to ONS (not necessarily my top goal). However when you know the date is a dud from the beginning its wasted resources. It wouldve been better suited for coffee- quicker and cheaper. The question is should I use coffee more to screen for 2nd date drinks and potentially miss on the potential intimacy building drinks is better at. I'm assuming the answer lies in my interpretation of the girl and how easy she may be prior to date and in the strength of the current plate rotation (i.e. if I have enough others spinning strong) I can be more patient and focus more on finances. Suggestions other than I am way too over-analytical?

Also how does one aquire/develop a true Fbuddy/booty call? I've rarely had access to a girl intimately that didnt require routine spending (usually food).

 

[Fruitbat]

OK, so I take my hat off to 10 women in a month. If I get 3 I am doing well.

If you are looking for fvck action then it has to be alcohol. I find it almost impossible to get ONS or any rapport without a few drinks.

It all comes down to what you are screening for. I am looking at LTR/family. So, I am screening this out online. I used to take whatever date comes along, based mainly on looks. Now, I am getting less dates. I am basically qualifying women early. I have a few essential screens, and I am only now investing time and money in women who are suited. I am doing what chicks do, and have done to me.

I have had so many wasted weekends when I knew, deep down, that the chick wasn't in the same place.

The arrangement often is an "attention for sex whilst we look for something better". I decided sex just isn't that important, not anymore, I can always pay a hooker. At £80 ($100 ish) for a pro who does it when you want, it's probably cheaper than dating. The cost of a meal, drinks, I have spent well over this, and you have no guarantee, and I can attach to women easy. Not actually banging hos, but I remind myself of this when I consider dating women just for fvcks.

If your bag is fvcks, why not spend on the hottest ones, or the most fun? 10 women a month is too much hard work, you are losing time to improve yourself IMO

 

[LJBFB]

10 may be overkill and of course id prefer to average 8s instead if 7s and get younger ones, but its a start. As I get a few on repeat I can entertain new and higher quality prospects while dropping to maybe 2 or 3 new a month when I get 3 others secured. Idk how to improve myself career and fitness is completely on point. Career is a waiting game or I move to a new locatio for any more improvement. I do approach when I go out, but dont quite have the wingmen Id like. Maybe I over rely on OLD but it seems better suited for me.

 

[Fruitbat]

10 may be overkill and of course id prefer to average 8s instead if 7s and get younger ones, but its a start. As I get a few on repeat I can entertain new and higher quality prospects while dropping to maybe 2 or 3 new a month when I get 3 others secured. Idk how to improve myself career and fitness is completely on point. Career is a waiting game or I move to a new locatio for any more improvement. I do approach when I go out, but dont quite have the wingmen Id like. Maybe I over rely on OLD but it seems better suited for me.

Career and fitness are just improvement for getting laid. They are quite hollow, yet very important. Are fvkcs, 8s or 9s the only place to improve? learn a foreign language, learn an instrument. I always went this route and ngelected fitness a lot, that's my error, but it makes a more rounded man. All about balance. Career and fitness are just 2 cornerstones, but many, many men have this. It's the things on top of this which secure the quality woman.....and even some quality women have done the hot guy or career guy to death.....as long as these are solid, having some unique things seems to be actually very attractive to women.

 

[Fruitbat]

I encourage you to pursue the 10s. Reduce the qty. and focus on 2-3 max. My max is 3 women at a time, and I meet nearly all of them via OLD. At any given time I can log on and easily score 3 dates. The 3 who make the cut are the women I consider as the hottest and most interested in me. Anything beyond 3 at a time is overkill for me.

I find even with 3.....do you ever get the time when you say "Yeah, you were saying last time x,y z....." and they are like "No, that wasn't me dude"

Happens a lot to me, I had 3 very early days plates and I kept mis-remembering big stuff, like the place they grew up etc.

10 plates and I would need a spreadsheet to remember stuff about them!

I would also need a shot of testosterone because satisfying 3 women a week is easily enough....more than enough.

 

[wjh]

I'm using OLD as a backup plan. I'm working on a few things on myself post-divorce, but I have had bad experiences with OLD. Ideally I want quality over quantity plates, it's just more my speed and I'm finding that the fear of in-person rejection is still something I want to be better at dealing with, I just feel like it's a more natural place to be as a man and for filterig out poor quality and disinterest quickly.

 

[LJBFB]

Not all 10 women are "plates." Some ghost me some I lose interest or never get physical with. Those are dates. Plates Id define as being sure of their sexual availability to me. If i had 10 gaurenteed lays Id prob not be enetertaining 2 or 3 new dates a week. I have a high drive but noone needs 10 regulars. I had 2 and other I thought that were close but my interest fell over time and theu didnt make it easy enough. Combine that with some flakes and I was glad that I never stopped lining up more. The work never ends but mostly im more satisfied than from any ltr before this. Yes I am trying to increase quality and i know I can but prpgreas is slowing.

 

[EyeBRollin]

I go on 2-3 first dates per week.

Keep a rotation of 3-4 max. Make the drink date 1 drink each. Only take out the best ones for a second date dinner.

Focus on her interest level it's how you get the most bang for your buck. If she ever flakes after you've met her, she's gone.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Do you want a 10 or 3 chicks buying you gifts, ****ing you senselsss and begging for your time? Choices, my friend.

 

[LJBFB]

Thanks for the comments. very true... a high interest 7 may in fact beat a 9. Problem is that none of these girls are even close to my last 2 ltrs which came through the scarcity of serial monogamy. I assume that as long as I keep a rotation the quality will improve. Recently I hooked up with an ex I hadnt spoken to in a long while, a girl that deserved to be left behind, and it has made me question the quality im getting lately as she is easily the most attractive female ive interacted with and she reached out to me. Nonetheless I have kept my distance from her since, despite irrational thought of a repeat hangout potential future. If it happens, I will at least make her do the initiating.

Next step is to build a social circle. I shall join a rec sports league that does after game drinks. tbc...

 

[marmel75]

So, I have dated about 10 women this month, and seen most of the ones I wanted multiple times. I was able to bed 3. I thought I had a couple more ready to jump on the team but $hit all seemed to fall apart quickly.includong losing my main plate and now just one consistent dtf. So now that I am almost starting over I want to improve. All else equal, I would prefer and do lean towards drinks. This with or with or without apps usually runs 40 to 80 bucks with the average girl not splitting bill. I make good money and can easily afford this, however doing this most days of the week is not conducive to current financial goals including student debt payoff. The advantages of drinks is that it is much easier to close ( kiss or f). Only one first date drinks converted to ONS (not necessarily my top goal). However when you know the date is a dud from the beginning its wasted resources. It wouldve been better suited for coffee- quicker and cheaper. The question is should I use coffee more to screen for 2nd date drinks and potentially miss on the potential intimacy building drinks is better at. I'm assuming the answer lies in my interpretation of the girl and how easy she may be prior to date and in the strength of the current plate rotation (i.e. if I have enough others spinning strong) I can be more patient and focus more on finances. Suggestions other than I am way too over-analytical?

Also how does one aquire/develop a true Fbuddy/booty call? I've rarely had access to a girl intimately that didnt require routine spending (usually food).

Damn not sure where you are at but when I took a woman out for drinks on the first date it rarely cost more than $20..usually if we ended up having a second drink she would offer to pay for it...not all the time but probably 80% of the time...

I know in a lot of the big cities drinks are more than a meal here would be and that is fvcking ridiculous...

 

[ubercat]

Yeah I think the drink driving limit is so low nowadays that bars have to make a killing on every drink. Taking them to a meal on a first date forget it that's a $100 night.

 

[ubercat]

And for fvck buddies go to professional type networking events and pick up the driven career girls. You'll have to listen to all their feminist b******* but even career girls pink bits need attention once in a while.

 

[breadd80]

It doesn't really matter, this is purely an economic decision for you, not a DJ decision.

Would you rather throw a few extra bucks at drinks to save the amount of time it takes you to get the lay? Or are you tighter on money and need to start out with a coffee?