Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Be Warned !

Married Buried

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expos said:
This is sadly, the story of A LOT of marriages these days. The divorce rate is close to 54%. ...that's right...it is more likely to FAIL than succeed.

That's true... if you marry an American b!tch. Marry a foreign woman and the chances are much higher. The true divorce rate with American b!tches is 70 percent. The divorce rate with foreign women is 20%.

Why do you think that is?
 

expos

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Malice said:
That's true... if you marry an American b!tch. Marry a foreign woman and the chances are much higher. The true divorce rate with American b!tches is 70 percent. The divorce rate with foreign women is 20%.

Why do you think that is?

I have no real clue. I have had one experience with a foreign woman - she was Vietnamese - and she would not leave me alone. Constant texting, calling, emails. I didn't even have to game her...and I wasn't attracted to her...so it made her work even harder to seduce me.

Divorce affects everyone. Poor, rich, ugly, beautiful. There are no guarantees that the woman you love will stand by you and you can't control what goes on in their heads. They will leave you for someone richer. If you are richer, they will leave you for someone who is better looking.

This is just the way it is. I'm finding it almost impossible to screen women these days...
 

betheman

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techno1 said:
OK BOYS>>... this is how it goes.... any married guy over 40 will agree.... especially if he has kids...

SO : When you are with a girl, it's just you and her... that is one thing... totally different to marriage... and a world away from marriage or LTR with kids....

It's you and her... She's in love with you, you care (and maybe provide) for her... great..... you think you've met your match....

She's your friend, confidant, lover, partner... she helps you around the house, shares the chores, maybe earns a little money, helps pay the bills, you can trust her.....

Fantastic....

Except this is a temporary situation....

First you get married, or at least get more committed... slowly your lives intertwine... maybe you sign a lease or buy a house together, your possessions, furniture, belongings, start to merge... you're getting exited about the future.... she's getting more comfortable... she doesn't need to work quite so hard to be sure that she's got you snagged.....

she can slack off on sex a little... perhaps she doesn't feel like it she won't make the effort.... perhaps she won't help out around the house quite as much, perhaps she won't dress as nice, perhaps she'll spend more of her money on herself..... more time with her friends or family... she'll put more demands on to you....

effectively she will start to lean on you.... start to use the relationship rather than contribute to it.

ops.....

and this is before children come along....

she may swear blind she doesn't want kids.... but as she passes 30 that will creep up on her... accidents can happen subconsciously if not on purpose....

if the urge for children is open and conscious, she'll subtlety push it on you, women are very clever manipulators.

women sometimes laugh between themselves, about how stupid men are.... and men are stupid in regards to women and their games....

i'm not saying this spitefully i'm just explaining to guys out there how women function.

women are out for themselves for what they want, and they play a long slow game, it's not done on purpose, they don't even know they are playing it half the time, and much of it is simply the natural function of the procreation of the species, that ultimately uses men as providers and fools them with sex, and the promise of life long companionship....

even if you don't have kids, she will be comfortable once you're in a long term relationship...

YOU have to make her work for it.... You can make it more difficult for her, make sure she carries on serving you, and contributing.....

There are theories about making marriage work and ways of spicing things up, and it can work it's true ... but for an independent, ambitious or creative man, marriage is a compromise... and not in a good way... it's one that leaves a good man "compromised"....

You may remember that great handsome guy in school who had a girl friend long before everyone else... he was always having sleep overs and snogging sessions with her.... but somehow around her, she seemed to make him weak.... sappy..... she had him wrapped around her finger... he was her puppy dog....

this is what women naturally do to men.... they use them..... men are a vehicle..... a means to an end..... it's just the natural mechanics... it's not done on purpose.....

NOW we get deeper into it....

Once a girl has a child... she is now a mother and a woman. That is TOTALLY different to the girl you once knew. When that baby comes out of her... she might as well be dead.... That girl is no more....

First of all... a woman who has a child will always love that child more than her husband... you are now no#2... sorry boy.....add a second kid and you are now her no#3..... down you slip.... add a nanny or house keeper and you're beneath her too... since the nanny is vital to your baby momma's care of the children and YOU ARE NOT ... not so much boy.....

sorry.......


down you slip......

children need constant attention, care, birthday parties, Christmas presents, school concerts... she loves her kids more than she loves you.... children NOT a husband makes a woman complete.....

Did you enjoy your childhood and school years ?

nah... pretty mundane and crap right..... well guess what.... she did.... and she's happy to be back in all that childish world, because in truth.... she thinks much like a child does... but she's also a mother.... she's your mother now..... you are roped to school functions, other kids birthday parties, minding the kids and all manner of tedious and mundane chores.....

now the nagging starts... you'll feel like the unwanted teenage step son, except where is dad to appeal to... oh you're dad... so how come momma won't listen...... ah well she's an empower woman now, a mother and it's just so wasy for her to put the fear of god into you, and control you.... just as your mother programed you to be controlled when you were a child....

it's a mans world.... ha.... when you are in it... but in the home it's a woman's world.... and you were programmed to submit, night and day for years by your own mother... years you cannot even remember....


oh well... at least you still have your good old friend and horny girl in bed....

WRONG!!!

she's had kids now, she doesn't need any more sex.... anyway.... she'll be too tired for sex most days, and most likely packed on 10+kg.... cellulite, flabby belly.... she might pretend she doesn't care, and she might not, but one way or another her loss of her looks also massively increases her insecurities... you know all those women body issues... well add the square root for a 35+ mother of two and add it again for every year after that......

insecurity breeds fear.... fear breeds all kinds of problems..... unspoken,complex ones that a poor logical male can never get to the bottom of.... he will die of cancer or a heart attack digging to the bottom of her issues..... there is no bottom.....

you're like the frog, you got cooked..... the water got hotter and hotter, the years slipped by and suddenly you are stuck with an angrier, bossier, more entitled version of your mother......

i can assure you there is no more miserable and tedious place in the world than a sexless, marriage, lauded over by her jealousy and insecurities....

and you thought you were getting married for companionship, trust, great sex,

hahahahahaha....

NO!

Understand that you are getting married to be the work horse that supports the family.

You are getting married so SHE can have a nice comfortable life... your life is not so important, it's the children that are important now.

You can look forward to creaking about when you hit 60 and they leave home, you can reminisce about the good old days before you had kids. You can remember the hot one night stand you had when you were 23... you can remember your buddies they are all fat and married too now, John died of a heart attack last week.... you'd lost touch.... you can have some memories.... ok..... like a guy in jail can remember before he was locked up....

you can have some hobbies, you're retired now, but remember most of your working capital was spent on the kids, so you'll only have a meager pension... maybe you can afford a cheap set of golf clubs or some crappy little sailing boat. you can go and lick your wounds on your own.... and she can make snide jokes to her friends as you come into her house....

Oh yes, make no mistake... the married home is her house.... absolutely.... what were you thinking of.... oh you thought you could share....

hahahahhahahahaha

You thought you could share you're life with your lover and confident...

But your lover and confidant is not your mother, or your baby momma.

OPS

Where did you go wrong.

OH Sorry... 75+ just hit...

G A M E - O V E R
this is a good post, a cautionary tale if ever there was one, do I have my own bad experience to back it up??? actually no, Ive got 4 kids, all grown up now, sometimes I look back and wander how life might have been if I never had them, do i regret having them? no fvcking way, I wanted them...that is the key, I was never pressurised into it, I never got the ..."I want a baby" speech, never, we just reached a point where it was the right thing to do. I wanted kids and she loved kids, I knew she did, no regrets.

however, Ive been around a while, Ive seen other relationships, the issue about the woman/girl wanting a child or to be a mother is such a strong biological urge, the female can and will if need be, use some very underhand tricks to achieve her goal, and often, having the child IS the goal, not having sexy time with you or making you happy, making you happy is the route to you coughing up your seed and then becoming the provider. ive seen so many women change so much once that child is on its way, the whole game changes for them and she is in the driving seat, if you get a woman like this, your screwed, you will be relegated to drone status.

how do you 'select' one who you want to have kids with, who wont sh!t on you once they arrive?( there are women who dont relegate you)
1, make sure it is what you want and that you are not just going along with her plan, to keep her happy, if you are being pressured, alarm bells should be going off!

2, if, as others have said, she lets slip the 'my children talk' , the alarm bells should now be accompanied by sirens

3, does she come from a good family? has she got good genuine values, not 'borrowed' ones? what are her role models, mother, sisters who have kids? if you cant assess this, you may be taking a bit of a gamble.

4 is her desire to be a mother taking hold of every damn conversation, this will tell you what you are in store for.
 

expos

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betheman said:
1, make sure it is what you want and that you are not just going along with her plan, to keep her happy, if you are being pressured, alarm bells should be going off!

2, if, as others have said, she lets slip the 'my children talk' , the alarm bells should now be accompanied by sirens

3, does she come from a good family? has she got good genuine values, not 'borrowed' ones? what are her role models, mother, sisters who have kids? if you cant assess this, you may be taking a bit of a gamble.

4 is her desire to be a mother taking hold of every damn conversation, this will tell you what you are in store for.
Christ, my ex-wife failed on all four of these. A good thing I never knocked the cvnt up.
 

CrimsonPanther

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very good post OP, this is the story of 60+% of marriages.
some people like living in the delusion they will be different, but problem is, this is not up to them, it is up to the woman. and in the moment you fully trust a woman, you are lost.
women are there to be enjoyed not to be trusted.

and the problem is, that these type of guys are being like females. they use shaming tactics to drag others into their fantasies, and if you don't want children, they say you don't deserve any, in a very manipulative way. they have zero respect for other people's choice, yet they expect respect from others for their choices. just like women do.

this has nothing to do with being alpha/beta/the whole greek alphabet, this has everything to do with one's intellectual capacities, and the ability to reject reality for temporary illusion of validation.
 

LiveFreeX

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Techno, you are likely the stupidest human being on Earth, I wish there was an award I could give you for that.

WTF is the point to life if you don't have children??? Humanity would cease to exist. Children are not that expensive dude, my wife, mother and father all grew up in poorer areas.

If anyone else is deluding themselves that women don't want children, let me just point this out.

THEY HAVE NO OTHER PURPOSE OR THEY WOULD BE MEN.

What is with the number of retards here who come on SS and bash children... are you all so narcissistic that you can't imagine sharing your life. I am scared of anyone who says they don't want children, that usually means they are heavily damaged in some way and couldn't care for them properly.

You are buying into feminism hook, line and sinker. PUA and the endless circle jerk of childless sex is nothing but an illusion. You build wealth for what purpose??? What is your motivation to work at all without children? You might as well live in a van down by the river. You will not be 21 forever.
 

john1234

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So true! this post makes me think because my LT GF wanted a kid and tried to reverse the reason on. She said that she wants me to have a kid so that I can experience the feeling!?

I almost bought it.
 

typical

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PairPlusRoyalFlush said:
Hard to believe that the answer is for the species to cease reproducing...must be another way...

Harsh bitter truth isn't it, you can thank feminism for that and blame the previous generation for producing weak men who couldn't provide a proper masculine role model for their children. You think most of us would be here if we actually had a decent masculine role model ? Hell my father was alpha as fu(k yet still society and its brainwashing turned me into a AFC in my early 20's with oneitis for a woman who was well beneath me and all aspects.

Yes there is a way to get married have kids and come out with a decent relationship go read rollo's blog and book for more insight,for me after the dj bible and the book of pook rollo's blog was the best read ever.
 

Paintballguy

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What OP described is exactly why my longest LTR only went 2 years. Everything is great during that honeymoon phase until the chick sets the hook. Then, it's just a downhill slope from there. There are good women out there, but they are very rare nowadays especially in the US.
 

YouWontTrackMe

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This is a great post and a lesson for everyone.

However

Two reason this happens, IMO:

- Men get attached to investments. Whether it's a business, house, car or wife, we become BETA about it.
- Lack of understanding when it comes to women
 

Frogster

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Coming from a guy OVER 40 I'd like to provide a little input.

First, sex after marriage DOES decrease. As in immediately. Yeah, you'll get some your wedding night, but that has nothing to do with her desire for you. She doesn't want "No sex on the wedding night" hanging over her head for the next 40 years. You may even notice the a decrease in sex DURING the honeymoon. So, I would say MOST women use sex to get the ring.

Now, where I believe the OP is off. His analysis is great from a guys perspective, but look at it from your wife's perspective.

A married couples Libido is rarely in tune. When they're young, the guy wants it all the time, and after 39 the girl wants it all the time. (At least from my experience.) That natural imbalance will cause "issues" within the marriage, no matter how old you are.

What most guys don't understand is the following:

Periods
PMS
Urinary Tract Infections
Yeast Infections
Indometriosis
A VAST number of other things that go wrong with women parts.
Your LAZY @ss stopped courting her after you got married.
Your LAZY @ss sits on the couch while she does all the house work.
Exhaustion from work.

Since she most likely has a weaker libido at a young age ALL of the above factors figure into her desire for sex. Most of these issues have NOTHING to do with you.

Then along comes the baby.

Underscore EXHAUSTION on the above list. And add "Baby Weight", and a sh!t load of other issues that go wrong with women parts. She no longer feels sexy, because she has lost her figure, and her t!ts have started to sag.


HOW YOU PARENT YOUR CHILDREN HAS A DIRECT IMPACT ON YOUR SEX LIFE


Here's a BIG KEY to raising healthy children, and having a healthy marriage.

You have to set the FRAME.

As a couple, you have to agree that the child will NOT be the center of the marriage. You as a couple are the marriage. This will help the family in a number of ways. One, the child won't grow up as a "Self Centered Brat", who believes the world revolves around them. And Two, what happens to the marriage after the kid leaves the nest? A child centered marriage, will most likely fall apart, whereas a couple centered marriage will continue to thrive.

A young child will find comfort in the fact that Mom and Dad date and flirt with each other. Unfortunately, a toddler is too young to understand. Part of parenting is prioritizing YOUR relationship OVER the relationship with the child. Which means you will need to spend couch time with your wife, while the little brat is throwing a trantrum on the floor, because you won't pick him up. However, once they understand "couch time", they will quickly accept it. In fact, they will find security in knowing that Mom and Dad are in love, while all of their friends parents are divorced.

The key to parenting, is being strict when they are young, and loosening the reigns when the child demonstrates responsibility. If you try the opposite, and try to crack down on a liberally parented child, you will only receive REBELLION.

You have to DATE your wife. The relationship and your love depends on it.

Once you're in your late 30s, your libido will slow down, and her's will speed up.

If she has a lot of women's issues, PUSH for a Hysterectomy. This will get rid of all the women's issues, and will DRAMATICALLY improve your sex life. Having a wife in her late 30s, or early 40s without girl parts is AWESOME.

Once menopause sets in, her libido will weaken, but by that time, so will yours, and you will have lived a happy life.

:up:

If you don't value her, or respect her. Then marriage isn't for you. Find a handful of slvts and fvck them as often as you'd like.

:p

Hope you enjoyed my two cents.
 
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