Herb
Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 9, 2016
- Messages
- 78
- Reaction score
- 18
- Age
- 34
Not that there's much I can do about it at this point, but I feel like venting about this ****block experience I've had recently, and am hoping people have tips about ways to avoid a similar experience in the future. This weekend, I was going out to a cool club and was having a great time, just grooving and dancing. I had some goofball friends come along with me but they were mostly doing their own thing. I started dancing with and and talking to this one super hot chick there, who was barely 21 if that. She instantly gravitated toward me and we hit it off pretty well. She was with a friend too, who was less attractive but not too bad. After just a couple of minutes, she asked if I wanted to ditch this place and come with them to another place, possibly a hookah bar. I was playfully coy for a bit, saying eh, I'll think about it.. I'm having lots of fun right here too, what's in it for me. Eventually I let them “convince me” to go with them, and they were quite excited. As they went for a brief bathroom stop on the way out, my one ****ing friend who was like creeping in the shadows behind us and listening in on our interaction followed me on the way out, saying, “hey man I'm coming with you”. I told him hell no and physically tried blocking him, knowing that he'd probably screw it up, but he insisted, saying he would either wing me or try to get with the “uglier” one. The only help he actually was the entire night was that he luckily somehow remembered the girls name I was talking to (which I had forgotten after a few minutes) and reminded me, despite the fact that he was just overhearing us while dancing nearby and hadn't engaged or talked to them directly. When they came out of the ladies room, I asked them if it was okay if he came along, and they were like “sure!”, and we left together.
We walked part of the way and took a cab the rest of the way. On that walk the hot girl's attraction went up even higher with me since it turned out we had a lot of interests and experiences in common, and I was able to connect with her emotionally on some things that were really important to her, like a trip to her favorite country, a certain music festival in the desert where we both did life-changing psychedelics, and humanitarian aid/development work we had in common. She was like bumping all into me on the walk and sorta holding on to me, clearly displaying numerous other IOIs in body language. Meanwhile, my friend was not doing so well with the other, and I could tell it was quickly deteriorating. Five minutes into it, I could tell she visibly didn't like the guy, but he seemed oblivious at the time. Everything he said seemed out of tune with what they were all about.
At the hookah lounge, we ended up just getting two separate ones (they probably did this so they could have an opening to bounce if needed), but they let me share with and hit theirs. Though I was doing good, mixing genuine, interested conversation with the occasional jokes and teasing, my friend kept giving out a bad vibe as the night went on, involving off-color racial jokes and a very cynical, disdainful, almost misanthropic demeanor, like he didn't really care about anything in the world (he does this on purpose thinking it works lol). Both the girls were more interested in me at this point than him, with their responses enthusiastic toward everything I said and rather the opposite to what he said. When we had some time alone, I tried hinting to him that he should either change his attitude or consider moving on and leaving me with them; by now, he acknowledged that they didn't like him but said he was too deep into it to just leave now. When he went to the bathroom, the girls even told me that they thought he seemed odd, mean, and uninterested (the other girl especially felt uncomfortable), and because of that were going to head out soon, but she told me I was cool and wanted to get to know me better. Turns out she lives like less than five minutes away from me in the same neighborhood (an out of the way area where there's mostly just old people, what are the odds). I got her number and then we paid and left the hookah place (I never paid for anything of theirs that night, come to think of it; we just split it evenly).
She even said that I should try to time my Uber Pool so that I would end up in the same car with her since we live practically in the same area. Unfortunately, I was a bit late on it and it didn't work, but I told her good night and got my own ride, leaving my friend to walk home alone, since he didn't live too far. I thought about just hitting her up right after to meet up at one of our places, but remembered she had a college class at like 8:45 in the morning as well.
The following evening, on Halloween, I texted her, connecting my opening line to a joke that we had the night before. But I haven't heard back in over two days... I don't get it. I feel like I did most things right, especially in contrast to my companion. Could it be just that by association with my friend, she decided to not want anything to do with me, after thinking about it the next day? I probably should have called instead to distinguish myself, but college students at that age text more often. Anyway, he later acknowledged that he probably ****blocked me but never really apologized, just saying, “ah forget it, there will always be more, let's go out again tonight buddy”. Yeah right. I'm done going out with this guy... even though he is normally a pretty good friend, he just tends to have bad people skills. A chance with a girl like that who also actually has a lot in common with me and lives nearby doesn't come up often. And yes, I know it's not a big deal overall but it was infuriating at the time.
Obviously, there's no point in continuing to try to contact her, but I guess if I've learned anything from this experience, it's not to take go out with *******s and to go for it as soon as you have the opportunity.
Anyone else have bad wingman and/or ****block experiences where a so-called friend ends up screwing you, intentionally or not?
We walked part of the way and took a cab the rest of the way. On that walk the hot girl's attraction went up even higher with me since it turned out we had a lot of interests and experiences in common, and I was able to connect with her emotionally on some things that were really important to her, like a trip to her favorite country, a certain music festival in the desert where we both did life-changing psychedelics, and humanitarian aid/development work we had in common. She was like bumping all into me on the walk and sorta holding on to me, clearly displaying numerous other IOIs in body language. Meanwhile, my friend was not doing so well with the other, and I could tell it was quickly deteriorating. Five minutes into it, I could tell she visibly didn't like the guy, but he seemed oblivious at the time. Everything he said seemed out of tune with what they were all about.
At the hookah lounge, we ended up just getting two separate ones (they probably did this so they could have an opening to bounce if needed), but they let me share with and hit theirs. Though I was doing good, mixing genuine, interested conversation with the occasional jokes and teasing, my friend kept giving out a bad vibe as the night went on, involving off-color racial jokes and a very cynical, disdainful, almost misanthropic demeanor, like he didn't really care about anything in the world (he does this on purpose thinking it works lol). Both the girls were more interested in me at this point than him, with their responses enthusiastic toward everything I said and rather the opposite to what he said. When we had some time alone, I tried hinting to him that he should either change his attitude or consider moving on and leaving me with them; by now, he acknowledged that they didn't like him but said he was too deep into it to just leave now. When he went to the bathroom, the girls even told me that they thought he seemed odd, mean, and uninterested (the other girl especially felt uncomfortable), and because of that were going to head out soon, but she told me I was cool and wanted to get to know me better. Turns out she lives like less than five minutes away from me in the same neighborhood (an out of the way area where there's mostly just old people, what are the odds). I got her number and then we paid and left the hookah place (I never paid for anything of theirs that night, come to think of it; we just split it evenly).
She even said that I should try to time my Uber Pool so that I would end up in the same car with her since we live practically in the same area. Unfortunately, I was a bit late on it and it didn't work, but I told her good night and got my own ride, leaving my friend to walk home alone, since he didn't live too far. I thought about just hitting her up right after to meet up at one of our places, but remembered she had a college class at like 8:45 in the morning as well.
The following evening, on Halloween, I texted her, connecting my opening line to a joke that we had the night before. But I haven't heard back in over two days... I don't get it. I feel like I did most things right, especially in contrast to my companion. Could it be just that by association with my friend, she decided to not want anything to do with me, after thinking about it the next day? I probably should have called instead to distinguish myself, but college students at that age text more often. Anyway, he later acknowledged that he probably ****blocked me but never really apologized, just saying, “ah forget it, there will always be more, let's go out again tonight buddy”. Yeah right. I'm done going out with this guy... even though he is normally a pretty good friend, he just tends to have bad people skills. A chance with a girl like that who also actually has a lot in common with me and lives nearby doesn't come up often. And yes, I know it's not a big deal overall but it was infuriating at the time.
Obviously, there's no point in continuing to try to contact her, but I guess if I've learned anything from this experience, it's not to take go out with *******s and to go for it as soon as you have the opportunity.
Anyone else have bad wingman and/or ****block experiences where a so-called friend ends up screwing you, intentionally or not?
