Anyone ever get tired of starting over again and again?

[XFORCE]

Do I have to live in New York or something?

I live in NJ and am in NYC all the time. There are a TON of women here BUT the level of entitlement (among other things) is off the charts. There's a rampant attitude of wanting the boyfriend treatment but not wanting to put in the work to become a girlfriend.

 

[sosousage]

commitment kills attraction for woman, so she respects you less, more red flags appear, and then done. if you want to commit you need to find a way to bring steady flow of attraction. and dont worry, these "taken already, healthy women" arent much more healthy than these that are single. they all are selfish.

just have more IDGAF attitude

 

[XFORCE]

commitment kills attraction for woman, so she respects you less, more red flags appear, and then done.

I've seen this from my friends (who are women) who were all crazy about getting engaged or married. The most zealous ones are already divorced or in the case of two of them, went nuts while they were engaged and cheated on their men. When I asked them why, they simply said their men bored them and it (whatever "it" means) wasn't what they expected.

 

[sosousage]

I've seen this from my friends (who are women) who were all crazy about getting engaged or married. The most zealous ones are already divorced or in the case of two of them, went nuts while they were engaged and cheated on their men. When I asked them why, they simply said their men bored them and it (whatever "it" means) wasn't what they expected.

yeah they rationalized it in their heads, they also felt no guilt when cheating

but theres not much you can do, will you stop loving women? no of course. if you dont want to get burnt then theres polygamous way.

maybe if society wouldnt be so forgiving for women then next generations wouldnt feel so entitled to cheat (i know its in our genetics, but we can try to push it out)

 

[guru1000]

Does anyone else just ever get tired of having to start over and getting to know a girl and sift through her red flags, her history, her family, her friends and her orbiters ? Just going through all that bull**** again is exhausting to think about.
The benefit of having a long-term relationship is building a bond and a friendship through that loving relationship and it is hard to let it go, however it is much more difficult to start a new with somebody else who will probably just disappoint you with her red flags and will end the connection early on.

I say if you were in your 20s find a girl who is just out of college yet to be divorced or have kids and have all that damage. However if you're in your late 30s then you're pretty much ****ed because any choice you have is a woman that's probably divorced with kids and a ****ty ex-husband u have to deal with. However if you can pull a girl in her late 20s Who is not damaged then congratulations. I am a week from 39 and dated a girl 26 to almost 30 with a kid , divorced and damaged beyond belief,( NPD princess syndrome). So any chance you have is a single girl with no kids mid to late 20s. That is the unicorn good luck


me, I got a German Shepherd instead.

1) I enjoy starting new rapports/relations. I would encourage you to eschew comfort (of relationships) and embrace challenges in your life. This will direct your mindset toward dating/plate spinning as the superior strategy to LTRs, and, ironically, will have more girls, as a result, seeking LTRs with you--as you have now become the untamable free tiger.

2) I'm older than you, and probably date 10-20 (often around 10) new girls per month. All the women I date between 24-34 have no kids and no previous marriages. An LTR would be a serious compromise of abundance. This line of thinking manifests in my behavior/attitude which is the primary driver for women chasing, and their LTR pushing.

 

[exhausted]

1) I enjoy starting new rapports/relations. I would encourage you to eschew comfort (of relationships) and embrace challenges in your life. This will direct your mindset toward dating/plate spinning as the superior strategy to LTRs, and, ironically, will have more girls, as a result, seeking LTRs with you--as you have now become the untamable free tiger.

2) I'm older than you, and probably date 10-20 (often around 10) new girls per month. All the women I date between 24-34 have no kids and no previous marriages. An LTR would be a serious compromise of abundance. This line of thinking manifests in my behavior/attitude which is the primary driver for women chasing, and their LTR pushing.

You have unreal mental energy..
i could not care any less to not talk to a girl and having to go through all the bs and efforts with all their stress and drama they require.

They arent worth the disappointment to me at this point.. or the time they take up.
Work.
Gym.
Box.
Dog.
I am fulfilled.

 

[BeExcellent]

Its funny. I so enjoy the stimulation of meeting new people and being in social situations that it has become second nature to me. I used to be painfully shy and I still recall what social anxiety was like (and it was awful) but I learned decades ago that nobody gives a crap about me and mine the way I do so I learned to love myself first and from there is an outpouring of positive energy that people really enjoy and are attracted to.

Every once in a while I'll run across a person who thinks they are going to re-frame me by making an off hand remark or a back hand manipulation. I recognize the structure of these sorts of covert efforts and either call them out directly with humor and a smile or I'll appear to agree and then go about doing whatever it was I intended to do. In other words I demonstrate my own self mastery regardless of what any body else thinks.

You can never know just who you are going to run into. I have set people up to have business conversations with one another, introduced people who ended up dating, I wing for people (men or women) and I just enjoy being social. I also enjoy being alone. When you get to a place where you genuinely love yourself, you radiate this outwardly to everyone around you. You become contagious in a good way. People are drawn to that sort of energy and this in turn makes interactions with people you've never met that much more effortless. It becomes a positive feedback loop. Just keep going and putting yourself out there. Mind your own attitude because that is where the rubber meets the road. Attitude frames your subconscious mind, which is the master of your internal self dialogue. You want deeply internalized (+) self dialogue.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I live in NJ and am in NYC all the time. There are a TON of women here BUT the level of entitlement (among other things) is off the charts. There's a rampant attitude of wanting the boyfriend treatment but not wanting to put in the work to become a girlfriend.

So how have the men adapted to counter this?

 

[ubercat]

@mrgoodstuff We've become DJs. With the average phone zombie attention slore we've learnt how to trigger their attraction and pump and dump.

For the guys like myself who like LTRs we've learnt how to set up and manage a rotation of plates which ensures anyone girl is never getting more attention than she's worth. So now you have both the funnel and the means to qualify the leads into good prospects or discards.

We've learnt how to dominate them in the bedroom and treat them like the slvts they want to be.

And in a relationship we've learnt how to hold frame and maintain polarity.

I'm not a million miles away from the kind sweet guy I used to be maybe just a 1000. My girlfriend calls me don bi - Northern tiger. She thinks I'm tough and masculine with a gentle side that she can bring out of me. Of course reality is more complex than that but she's manufactured the image she needs.. perfect

We have this principle in the martial arts if somebody tries to hit you with a fast combination of punches treat it as one punch, e.g. jam it so they can't punch, zone away, use their energy to feed hand ,,traps and counterpunching, attack their legs, use their arm as a pivot point to move behind them so your past the weapons etc.

It's kind of the opposite with women. It's a homoeopathic principle a little bit of poison taken regularly makes you stronger. Focusing on one woman will make your head spin, engaging casually with groups of them maintains the correct attitude.

 

[guru1000]

How many hours per week do you work?

Mo: 13
Tue: 13
Wed: 12
Thur: 9
Fri: 4-5

Fri night - Sunday = All play

You have unreal mental energy..
i could not care any less to not talk to a girl and having to go through all the bs and efforts with all their stress and drama they require.

They arent worth the disappointment to me at this point.. or the time they take up.
Work.
Gym.
Box.
Dog.
I am fulfilled.

I have an extremely high sex drive. I really enjoy the process. I'm never disappointed as IDGAF, truly. No stress, no expectations, no worries. Women are my entertainment: Just pure, adulterated, shameless fun.

 

[guru1000]

That's like the absolute ideal schedule for dating haha, nice

I started my business working 12-hour+ days, 7 days a week, for five years. It was not fun, but I was married back then so I didn't need to concern myself with women. When I became single again, I hired 1 or 2 F/T employees to assist in my workload, and free up my time. Best investment/decision I ever made.

 

[XFORCE]

So how have the men adapted to counter this?

Go for volume over quantity. There are some that are worthwhile but the unfortunate thing is that they're surrounded by the awful ones that taint them.

 

[exhausted]

Mo: 13
Tue: 13
Wed: 12
Thur: 9
Fri: 4-5

Fri night - Sunday = All play


I have an extremely high sex drive. I really enjoy the process. I'm never disappointed as IDGAF, truly. No stress, no expectations, no worries. Women are my entertainment: Just pure, adulterated, shameless fun.

Well said and good system.
Hopefully i am on the same path.
I'm not depressed or down more energized and happy to have time for myself instead of sacrificing for an unappreciative mood disordered woman..

 

[exhausted]

Good. That means you are moving on in a healthy way.

Never been a relationship where I wasn't relieved on some level by breaking things off. Chill for a bit until you start getting bored, then jump back in.

And remember the pain in the arse of having to build up momentum over again the next time a woman tries to coax you into being exclusive.

Appreciate it.
I have no choice but to move on. Love isn't enough. When someone has a disorder nothing you can do if they won't put in the effort to grow.

 

[QuadDeuces]

Yes it sucks.

 

[noBSgames]

I'm 32 and I just don't have the time for it.. I just got out of a 2 1/2 year relationship with a BPD ex so right now pretty much anything will set a red flag off for me.

Really right now I don't have the time to devote to a girlfriend it's almost November and I'm going to be crazy busy at work last thing I need is a girl nagging me why I can't come see her after doing 10+ hour days or 60 hours a week.

 

[resilient]

It’s almost November and I'm going to be crazy busy at work last thing I need is a girl nagging me why I can't come see her...

heh... not to mention getting dragged to holiday parties with her coworkers, her family, friends (that you may or may not like), Christmas shopping, festivals, and whatever you’re probably not invested/interested in.

I can remember my ex dragging me to multiple department stores year after year looking for the perfect dress, and accessories for the Christmas holiday work party. She tried on tons and tons of dresses and nothing ever satisfied her (despite my approval) so we would go to store to store to store. I had to excercise a lot of patience. For some reason, she could never shop alone. I wonder if many women are like this......

 

[noBSgames]

heh... not to mention getting dragged to holiday parties with her coworkers, her family, friends (that you may or may not like), Christmas shopping, festivals, and whatever you’re probably not invested/interested in.

I can remember my ex dragging me to multiple department stores year after year looking for the perfect dress, and accessories for the Christmas holiday work party. She tried on tons and tons of dresses and nothing ever satisfied her (despite my approval) so we would go to store to store to store. I had to excercise a lot of patience. For some reason, she could never shop alone. I wonder if many women are like this......

Ha in my case of doing that she was shopping for her replacement and little did I know I was approving it

 

[Roober]

What do I struggle with the most? I like to travel. I like to see new places. When I get a new woman, she wants to see all the places I have already been because often they don't travel. I will revisit places I enjoy (Hawaii, San Diego, Monterey, Las Vegas, and New York) with the new woman, but she will be on her own for everywhere else.

So, for me, it is travel and establishing routines... things as simple as "who is cooking dinner?" or when they come for dinner, they need to help cook and clean.... things like that...

 

[ubercat]

Yeah I'm bringing the girlfriend back to meet the family this year. It's close to 2 years now so she's earned something. And my sister on a visit practically invited her so it was a bit hard to dodge.

There's only so many touristy things to do in Auckland so I will have to go to them all again and pretend I have never been there with any other girl of course.