Anti-Dump's Machine (Part I: Interest Level)

Discussion in 'Don Juan Tips' started by Pook, Oct 16, 2003.

  1. Pook

    Pook Master Don Juan

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    Before the posts of Anti-Dump slip away forever, there ought to be a recollection of what he said. The length of these posts is to provide a summary, and quotes, of Anti-Dump’s Machine!

    This is Anti-Dump's MACHINE. Anti-Dump was interested in filtering out the non-interested chicks and finding the one he wanted. This is why Anti-Dump was not Doc Love. Doc Love was interested in boosting a female's interest level through using challenge and such. Anti-Dump wasn't interested in boosting women's interest levels; he only wanted a chick for himself. His 'machine' was not to make women interested, it was to separate the wheat from the chaff.

    Anti-Dump’s Machine is not ‘everything’. You still must build yourself up and create a life. Anti-Dump’s Machine is a good system to find an INTERESTED chick and keep her for an LTR and eventually marriage.

    For example: If a girl goes back to her ex, most guys think the chick is broken. Anti-Dump would see it as a DUMP. But does the guy see it as a dump? No, his VANITY is in the way. He and the other guys just conclude the women are ‘broken’ or ‘mad’.

    If this guy had used Anti-Dump’s Machine, he would never have been in such a situation. In other words, girls are not CRAZY, you just weren’t MAN enough for her.

    Most guys get a girlfriend and get that stupid smug look on their face. “I got a girlfriend.” But does she like you or is she really just bored? Anyone can get women. Remember, even AFCs can get women. PLEASING them cannot be the barometer of success. Pleasing YOURSELF is in what you want.

    This also applies to the Urban Breed, who get together with their friends to tell how many chicks they’ve ‘scored’ just like chirpy chicks telling each other how much they’ve gotten from a guy. When we play this game, we just go in a circle boosting nothing in our lives but vanity.

    Anti-Dump and Interest Level

    If you asked Anti-Dump, “What ought I to do to please the women?” he would reply:

    “What! Please the women? Stop looking from the perspective of the woman and start looking at what pleases YOU.”

    This is where most guys get Anti-Dump wrong. These guys (Speed Seductionists, etc.) keep trying to CREATE romantic interest. “I will give the women a chance to get to know me.” Anti-Dump isn’t interested in CREATING interest because it has to already be there. This confuses many.

    Let us say a cool guy uses Anti-Dump’s Machine. He finds a girl that loves him. Now let us say a bum on the street uses Anti-Dump’s Machine. He finds no girl that loves him.

    “See! See! His Machine doesn’t work!”

    Fools! You are placing the success on obtaining women, not on obtaining INTERESTED women. It is not a black and white world of “Success = Having Women” and “Failure = Staying Single.” No, it is “Success= Not being attached to UNINTERESTED women.” and “Failure = Being attached to an UNINTERESTED women.” Being in an unhappy marriage is worse than being single.

    In both the cool guy and the bum’s examples, Anti-Dump’s Machine worked. The Machine is not to get you a woman, its purpose is to WEED OUT uninterested women. If you are the street bum, no women will be interested in you. The machine is not the failure, the man is.

    Now if the street bum recreated himself and became Cool Guy, the machine will throw up an interested women eventually.

    It is that simple.

    You pick the dates YOU want at first. She needs to like your style.

    Exactly! YOU are the focus, not the girl. She needs to like who you are, not you to mold yourself to her pleasures. You guys are not ‘creating’ interest, you are just deceiving yourself. Why do people deceive themselves? Because it flatters the ego.

    Women who won’t let the men lead (at first) are scared of being women. You need to avoid them.

     
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  2. Pook

    Pook Master Don Juan

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    It is as if the dog women want to be treated like beauties (with flowers and chocolates) while the beautiful women want to be treated like dogs (mistreated, hurt, kicked).

    Stop being sappy not because it won’t get you hot chicks but because it’s so disrespectful to yourself. You start awarding flowers to women who have not earned them.

    I would also add sex and boy toys. Yes, women DO use guys as sex toys. You want to stay away from such chicks because it is impossible to have a healthy relationship with them (a woman ought to be giving, not taking).

    To sum up:

     
  3. Eyecandie4ya

    Eyecandie4ya Senior Don Juan

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    Priceless!

    The most precious thing that we have is our time, so we might as well make sure we're not wasting on non-interested females.

    No matter how beautiful she is.
     
  4. ShortTimer

    ShortTimer Banned

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    Can I get a hallelujah?
     
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  5. darwinian_sympathiser

    darwinian_sympathiser Don Juan

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    Dear Pook,

    I had a thread here somewheres where I defended Anti-Dump's advice, but it was a partial defence and I never finished it since I had other things to do - and still do. You have almost finished it for me.

    However I like to add the following:

    Interest level is a very weird thing, and maybe we may never understand it really. I'm of the philosophy that you cannot make anyone interested in you - that is you cannot "willing" boost anyone's interest level in you. They either like you or they don't and I've learnt that the hard way and through bitter experience. Also I usually find that it is none of anybody else's business who is interested in who - and of this I will talk about later

    The human condition is vain. Most of us delude ourselves into thinking that we're so special because, ultimately, we are the one and only person we will ever really know. That's just the human condition and how each and every one of us handles that is our choice and our choice alone. I don't mean to be rude and I don't mean to be brutal but ultimately you can only choose the things that life offers you. Like Deep Dish says in his powerful "Women are simple" thread, the women you get are a reflection of you, you cannot create interest when it's not already there, no more can you turn something on when it's already on.

    I believe in building myself up and creating a life, but I also believe that the woman that I will end up with will accept me regardless as I am (minus extreme cases like being extremely poor and being in a constant state of drunkeness when we meet). I believe that women have no control over who they are attracted to just as men have no really control over who they are attracted to. And that's why we have this incredible mess.

    The other thing I like to add about the human condition is our own vanity. I've seen it in myself and in others and it is truly disturbing to say the least. Sometimes the problem in getting women lies not in the women themselves but actually other men who see you as their rivals.

    Humans have a tendency to be hierachical - regardless what we say to the contrary. For examples of this you only need to look at women's obssession with thinness in the western world and how each and everyone of us rate other people's physical status and attractiveness. I have totally fallen out with friends because I managed to attract the person they wanted as well, and they can't stand knowing this and cut off all contact. At the other end I have felt a brutal rage that I never knew I could feel when a colleague gave his opinion that such and such a girl was too pretty for me to have. The rage did not come out at the time but took about a day or 2 to surface as I realised it was a mark of total disrespect and I have never been on good terms with him since. And I also was angry at myself for not have the guts to tell him to go fvck himself about it.

    I suppose I grew up when I realised that your life is the only life you really know and even though there are certain things that you cannot change no body has any real right to judge you, and likewise you don't really have any right to judge other people, especially when it comes to love. And love crops up in the most absurd situations, and always least when you expect it.

    My advice is simple to take what life offers you and never, and I mean ever, be ashamed of what you are because at the end of the day we all have to bow down to nature in the end. Men may do as they want, but they can't will what they will, as Schopahauer once put it.
     
  6. Survivor

    Survivor Master Don Juan

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    For the record, Anti-Dump was the most influential poster in this site's history. I'm glad to see Pook resurrecting some AD's old stuff.

    I once posted to AD about a six year oneitis I once had. (yeah, six years) I complained that while I no longer chased after the girl, I was still alone and not attracting any other women. I was in what one can call a "Wilderness Stage". AD responded with:

    I did'nt fully get the gist of what he was saying but in retrospect I now understand. At the time I was not attracting any women, but I had to learn to develop PATIENCE, and stick with it.

    I don't know what Part II is gonna entail, Pook, but hope you discuss what I call the "Wilderness Stage", when one has learned to "next" disinterested women, but has not yet developed qualities needed to attract interested ones.
     
  7. Pook

    Pook Master Don Juan

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    Darwinian

    Good post. I agree that I think the biggest issue that keeps people back is their vanity.

    If you go to Nice Guy and talk of the truth, he will not hear you. Why? He KNOWS he is correct. What keeps a nice guy being a nice guy is his own vanity.

    We decieve ourselves more than anyone else does.

    I've noticed that the older and more mature posters seem to tip their hat at Anti-Dump.

    Survivor

    I don't know if Part II will fit your requirements, but I gathered all the Anti-Dump material I could to frame it into a unified thought, a machine as Anti-Dump says.

    Actually, a lot of his stuff was surprising and informative to me even though I've been here years. There are some interesting nuggets of gold that I've never seen.

    There will be around 10 parts. And ALL of it is GOLD :)

    To Everyone

    If Anti-Dump gave you advice and such, post it. Let's get all the information out that we can.
     
  8. simplyme

    simplyme Don Juan

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    and exactly this makes the whole thread and the machine irrelevant. Except a few players, I think, that there is not one in this forum, who had not spent years trying in vain, to find out, why not a single even remotely attractive woman was attracted to him. Some of us found the reason and the solution and give others advice, others are still struggling.
    This post should better be, HOW the street bum became the good guy. THAT would be an interesting thread.
     
  9. Survivor

    Survivor Master Don Juan

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    My point exactly. But lets give my man Pook some time. After all, AD never really gave alot of initial posts. Most of AD's tips were responses from other posters, which makes his posts more difficult to find.
     
  10. darwinian_sympathiser

    darwinian_sympathiser Don Juan

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    Dear Survivor,

    oneitism is nothing to be ashamed of, it's just something you want and cannot have . . . . I too suffered from it in my youth. The lady in question had no interest in me whatsoever. I tried all I can to make her interested in me but I could never do it. I had a school friend who gave me these silly trashy views that teenagers and young people give when they say what attracts them to one another:

    "really its down to character"

    He also had the cheek to indirectly imply that I could have gotten her interested in me if she had gotten to know what I was like. Thoughts like this and what I saw in trashy movies and drama series dominated my thoughts. I was so p*ssed off and angry and under incredbile rage (and this lasted for 2 years) that I set about learning all I can about love and had come to give a partial mathematical proof of the brutal conclusion that love was deeply prejudiced and vain. By this I mean that I found out that none of us really have any real control over who were are interested in and who we are not. When you are sexually interested in someone you are just sexually interested in someone and you can't help that. Our preferences and what we find attractive paint our own vanity, they taint our own identities and how we see ourselves. This is another aspect of human nature that I find quietly disturbing.

    I'm not ashamed to say on this site that I am of the view that love is vain and deeply prejudiced. For if it were not there would be no such thing as love. I have never fallen in love with someone just because of their character or because of their other intrinsic qualities and I seriously doubt anyone else has either. I can't help being attracted to certain women that I find sexy and act cold to the ones that I find physically repulsive, because I know that women have the same kind of behavioural repretoire towards us men.

    Some people go through life, get the oneitis, and she wants him too and live in maritial bliss. They then delude themselves for the rest of their lives that it could not have been anyone else. Such is the amazing feat that human vanity can scale. But deep down all of us want this to happen to us. For the unfortunate others this does not happen and we feel as the result of the oneitis not loving us back is generally anger, hurt and a lot of pain, along with social withdrawal and a more cynical outlook on life.

    Then there are the dangerous as*holes (some of whom posted on this site) and one I know in particular that no matter what the signs were from the person in question they still can't accept that she's just not interested. They totally delude themselves and wait years in vain hope that something might change or the right situation might occur for them to get together with this person. These people are nearly on the edge of stalking and this is truly disturbing. I'd like to quote bondjamesbond of what he says about it:

    "A real man knows when to walk away and stop wasting time. The idiot will drum up a hundred reasons in his head why a chick is acting cold towards him but will never accept the bottom line: She doesn't want to f**k with you."

    But I'll give love one thing though, one bit of hope and lee way that might recompense it for the hurt it has caused to many. When proper love does happen it has a devastatingly magical quality. There's this girl I see from time to time. She showed all the signs of interest to me initially but I was cold to her and she was p*ssed off by that. Gradually she broke down my barrier but before I could get together with her she had already moved on (I decided to get round to talking to her only after about 5 months of her showing the signs). Every time I bump into her it's like nothing ever matters, and she stills smiles at me and I still go all awkward around her not daring to speak to her knowing that she's already spoken for now. I try to hate her as much as I can when I don't see her around but what I do bump into her my mind short of likes changes . . .

    I'm a mathematician. I'm train in wanting to find the truth - regardless whether it be politically correct or not. Regardless of who's feelings I hurt. Regardless of what trouble I get into. I make mistakes like everyone else, but as I age I make them a whole lot less, and am honest enough with myself to admit to them. Some people never do. Some people get what they want in life and don't want anymore and their lifes are, to all intents and purposes, sorted so they will never feel most of the frustrations that some of us reading this feel. Those are the lucky ones. For the rest of us we play the game, hoping that we might find someone who makes us feel the way we want to feel. . .
     
  11. Matt Rogers

    Matt Rogers Master Don Juan

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    I'm curious, once a high interest level is established does it dissipitate over time?

    To give you some context. This girl was really interested in me this summer at work: smiling at me, saying how she knew she liked me when I gave a a rare compliment, accidentally brushing past me, and when I mentioned a girl I went on a date with during that time, she was really inquisitive about the girl, and my reasons for not pursuing that particular girl. As at the time I was not interested in her, I was friendly and polite but did not pick up on her hints or go out of my way to talk to her. One evening on her birthday a group of us went out for ameal and drinks and I got rather drunk, and she began her questioning about what my type was (did she want me to describe her?) I listed attributes of my favourite porn model -long blonde hair, long legs, good at cooking, basically everthing she wasn't.
    At the end of the evening she tried to kiss me goodnight, but I gave her the cheek brush and left. She was rather cold for the rest of the time, and made a vague suggestion about meeting up at university sometime.
    I happen to be up at her uni for a debating competition in Nov so I suggested we meet for a brief coffee and a chat, which she agreed too, but I am not sure whether she thinks we have ended up as just friends, or whether she secretly retains the high interest level and would fall into my arms, the moment she thinks i reciprocate this interest.

    Sorry if this deviates slightly from the thread, but as I am not sure what ADs Machine would say on this problem.
     
  12. Clint Eastwood

    Clint Eastwood Don Juan

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    Yes, unfortunately high interest level sometimes does dissipate over time. But, worse than that, I agree with Doc Love that most men over-rate a woman's Interest Level in them. I guess it's our ego. We think we're so great that everyone should love us. She tells us that she loves us. So, she must really love us. Right?

    Wrong! Sadly, there are many women married to men that they never even loved. I've heard women say this. I've heard my own mother say it. Don't be deluded by the Hollywood Romantic Myth, that all marriages involve two people that loved each other at one time.

    If a woman really, and truly has high interest level in a man, it won't be easy to dissipate it if you have any good sense about relationships. And, this site can give you that. What it can't give you, is the ability to judge whether or not she really has high interest level.

    That's where Anti-Dump's advice is so helpful. Keep reading these great posts that Pook brought up, and then go out and use this stuff in the real world to gain experience. I've been doing this stuff for a few years, but I don't put enough effort into it. I need to start putting a lot of effort into it, if I'm ever going to have a chance at finding Miss Right.

    But, be warned that even with this knowledge and the experience you'll need to gain, there is no gaurantee that you'll have a woman with truly high interest. This is what separates the men from the boys. The boys can't stand to be alone in life, so they'll eventually settle for a woman who may not have high interest just so they can be married. The men would rather be alone, than to spend their days with a low interest loser.
     
  13. One on One

    One on One Master Don Juan

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    Great post. The only flaw I see in AD's reasoning is that a girl may have valid reasons for rejecting your dates. I do not always want a girl that is identical to me. If she is turning down simple dates like coffee or dinner, then that is a problem, however if she is turning down skydiving or water-skiing, then I don't see the problem there. I'd probably find it cute that she is scared to do those things. The key is why she is turning the date down.
     
  14. jenna

    jenna New Member

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    Really good post!!I have warned male friends over and over again not to waste time on someone who has no real interest. But as someone said,male ego gets in the way,and any slight positive attitude makes some men keep trying.

    If a woman does not show interest. If she is too busy to go out with you or cancel dates.....leave! Believe me. If a woman likes you,she will cancel whatever she had planned to spend some time with someone she just met.

    The more time you invest in trying to get her to see what a great guy you are, the less likely you are willing to admit to yourself she is not interested. Do not make excuses for her.

    There are too many women out there. She is either interested or she is not. Otherwise......next. Dating is a numbers game for men and women. If you make yourself more physically appealing to the opposite sex the numbers will be greatly in your favor. You only have a few minutes initially to get her attention.
     
  15. Ricky

    Ricky Master Don Juan

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    Brutal but true in a way.

    But you know what, when you are a guy that has invested alot of time into getting a great career, great body, and great sense of style and fun, why shouldn't you expect to attract and create interest in alot of women?

    And this is exactly why, if you meet a girl that flat out isn't interested even with all the positive traits you have, you shouldn't waste your time with her.

    Noone needs a high maintenance partner. There are both men and women that fit that role.
     
  16. Lifeforce

    Lifeforce Master Don Juan

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    bump
     
  17. Omega

    Omega Master Don Juan

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    and if she won't sign prenups, RED FLAG.

    Beauitful.
     
  18. S0LID

    S0LID Master Don Juan

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    Just a few questions,

    If you phone a girl, and say "lets play pool" and she says, "no I don't fancy pool", then you reply, "o I was realy looking forward to playing pool, I'll give you a call another time". What if she then gives in and says "ok, ok, i'll play pool" (maybe says it with some attitude). What is the best thing to do then?

    Also you say hot girls here compliments so often it's almost meaningless, yet i have met many girls who are hot and dont know it! What to do then?
     
  19. A-Unit

    A-Unit Master Don Juan

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    Re:

    I agree very much so with Anti-Dump and believe it's about finding what you like. For one reason or another, perhaps TV, society, familial brainwashing, or just NEED, guys feel they have to maneveur and seduce. With that mindset, you do what it takes to get the END goal, while not enjoying the MEANS to the goal.

    It's like...

    Wanting to be rich, but despising the whole journey on the road to BECOMING. Or lifting, and wanting a better body, but HATING the 1 or 2 hours you put in doing it. That's ludicrous?!

    If she doesn't do NOW what you want, why bother? If you envision going to the big city clubbing with her, and all she wants are small dates in her favor, HOUSTON WE HAVE A PROBLEM.

    I envision travelling the world, going to company events, skiing, going to Pro Golf events...if I can't even get a girl interested in coffee, or pool, or going with me to the mall, then what is she doing with me??

    If a girl says that to you, bring her along. Go as planned and see how she behaves. If she's uptight because it WASN'T what she had in mind, tough luck. Ask her what she had in mind. Find out, so you can honestly bridge the gap or move on.

    It's ok to compliment, just don't make it the only thing you have to say. Women want to hear compliments from men THEY RESPECT; otherwise they're meaningless as a way to pick her up.

    A girl I'm dating has DD's. Never before has a guy commented on who she is as a person. NEVER! I wouldn't be dating her still if I wasn't attracted to who she was. Sure, a 5foot blonde with cannons the size of melons and a tight portuguese butt is a sight for any guys' eyes, BUT, she knows this. She's gotten it almost everyday of her life. And compliments aren't FEELINGs. They don't invoke a sense of manliness if that's all the ammunition you've got. Besides, that sort of aloof attitude is appreciated by women. You must BELEIVE and not just HEAR...

    "Sure, I've dated and met alot of cute girls, but I something more than just a pretty face to look into. I need someone with substance, personality, that will keep my attention longer than 1 date."

    NOW, you're picky, you're setting the bar.

    In business, the best marketing standpoint you can have is to SET the STANDARD and tell people what it OUGHT to be.

    So you say...

    *Here's what women deserve.
    *Here's what I offer.
    *Here's what I expect.

    If you boldly proclaim what women want...

    *Attractive, well-kept guy.
    *Has goals, beliefs, values, and is solidly grounded.
    *Keeps his word.
    *Knowledgable and protective.
    *Fit and intelligent.
    *Expects respect.

    Now you KNOW what women desire, she must KNOW you are those things or how else would you KNOW them?

    I've done it quite alot, because it's what I know and believe...I state that to elicit what SHE wants, and can PROVIDE.



    A-Unit
     
  20. Bonhomme

    Bonhomme Master Don Juan

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    Props for bumping this timely (for me) thread, SOLID.

    This brings to mind the South Indian monkey trap. The trap consists of a hollow coconut that has some rice in it, and a hole large enough for the monkey's hand to get in, but too small for the hand with a handfull of rice to get out.
     

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