10 things to look for in a wife

[Jitterbug]

I'd like to replace the list with just #3 on it and "#0: She doesn't own a smart phone". That should cover everything else on that list without having to spell it all out.

 

[SamTheHobit]

Don't you think if she's a virgin into her 20s it already takes care of a few things on the list?

 

[JoeMarron]

What would you recommend a man do if he's found a woman with all of these qualities, he wants to have a family one day, yet he's young and inexperienced? Many men here preach the importance of getting your life in order, sowing your wild oats, etc. before settling down. However, like you said a woman like that is a needle in a very large haystack. I imagine a man might regret not cashing out on a good thing while he had the chance.

 

[Colossus]

Don't you think if she's a virgin into her 20s it already takes care of a few things on the list?

Yes.

What would you recommend a man do if he's found a woman with all of these qualities, he wants to have a family one day, yet he's young and inexperienced? Many men here preach the importance of getting your life in order, sowing your wild oats, etc. before settling down. However, like you said a woman like that is a needle in a very large haystack. I imagine a man might regret not cashing out on a good thing while he had the chance.

That's a tough call, but I would err on the side of getting more experience. 22 is WAY too young to be considering marriage and I think you'd regret it. No one ever said "gee, I wish I would have gotten married a decade sooner".

 

[Oxide]

Is the original poster married? Has he been?

 

[JoeMarron]

That's a tough call, but I would err on the side of getting more experience. 22 is WAY too young to be considering marriage and I think you'd regret it. No one ever said "gee, I wish I would have gotten married a decade sooner".

Alright lets play devil's advocate here. This is true but I'm sure there's also men who has said, "gee, I wish I would've stuck with that awesome chick I dated a few years ago." I know this is a scarcity mindset. There's several billion women in the world but the wife material ones actually are scarce. (I know someone's gonna bring up the foreign women argument. Not everyone has the desire to leave their homeland just to find a wife.) What does experience even mean? Experience in knowing how to deal with women? If a man is planning on marrying the woman he's with, how is experience with other women going to benefit him? As far as experience in seeing what kind of woman you like, if you already found one that's wife material then I don't see the point of that. Its like buying a car that you've fallen in love with, it meets all your needs yet you sell it because you want experience with other cars. Also I'm not recommending getting married that young. However, if a dude that age has already found a worthy wife then there's nothing wrong with dating her for a few more years before he marries her.

 

[Aubree]

Just to add, she should be wise. A wise person makes good decisions and gives good instruction.

 

[Bible_Belt]

"Don't bore me" is the only thing on my list. I'm sure I could find a nice young Pentecostal girl who meets every criteria on this thread. And in five minutes, I would be bored out of my mind.

 

[( . )( . )]

"Don't bore me" is the only thing on my list. I'm sure I could find a nice young Pentecostal girl who meets every criteria on this thread. And in five minutes, I would be bored out of my mind.

Then may I suggest a male friends for that. Chicks are not really designed for scaling mountains , slamming back booze, friendly sparring or to ponder Socrates Apologia with you.

It's not a womans job to "thrill" you. That bullsh!t meme was started by moustached lezzo's trying to sell equalism.

 

[speed dawg]

Then may I suggest a male friends for that. Chicks are not really designed for scaling mountains , slamming back booze, friendly sparring or to ponder Socrates Apologia with you.

It's not a womans job to "thrill" you. That bullsh!t meme was started by moustached lezzo's trying to sell equalism.

Bible Belt's response was nothing more than his way to excuse himself from the aforementioned rules. His own rationalizing, if you will.

 

[speed dawg]

Great list. Men would be saved so much headache if they just followed these simple rules.

Having said that, my girl is divorced and that is the only one she violates. In fact, the only reason I chose her despite this flaw is that she married younger and spent very limited time being single (carouseling).

This is where #4 comes in, IMO. Obviously not many can meet all these requirements. I preferably want a woman who has been around enough to at least not be boy crazy, or leave for the first mother f*cker who is better looking than me, not sure if I'm communicating this the best way or not, but still. It's just reality, but single digit partners nowadays should almost be considered a virgin. Though personally I would prefer under 5.

 

[Bible_Belt]

leave for the first mother f*cker who is better looking than me

Getting thoughts like that out of your head is more important to a relationship than any woman's trait mentioned on this thread. Male insecurity is the cause of just as many breakups as the long list of things we hate about women.

 

[speed dawg]

Getting thoughts like that out of your head is more important to a relationship than any woman's trait mentioned on this thread. Male insecurity is the cause of just as many breakups as the long list of things we hate about women.

Most definitely, male insecurity is the #1 cause of breakups.

But predictably, as I stated in the post, I communicated this wrong, thus giving guys like you a way to attack. If you think for one second that your girlfriend/wife won't be tempted by someone of higher value than you at some point in your life together, you're nuts. That's your ego/pride talking, pal. You aren't the best, you aren't the most alpha, etc. Even if you're doing everything right.

At some point, we have to hold women accountable for just thinking with their emotions. They should be expected to use at least a minimal level of rational and moral judgement. I mean, you're making these women out to be some brainless being that's completely at the mercy of a male's 'security'. F*ck that, they have to show some initiative as well. It's not my job to live their life for them. That sh*t has been going on way too long.

 

[Bible_Belt]

If you think for one second that your girlfriend/wife won't be tempted by someone of higher value than you at some point in your life together, you're nuts. That's your ego/pride talking, pal. You aren't the best, you aren't the most alpha, etc. Even if you're doing everything right.

First you said better looking; now you say "higher value." The latter is much more intangible, and a matter of perception.

At some point, we have to hold women accountable for just thinking with their emotions. They should be expected to use at least a minimal level of rational and moral judgement.

That's like saying we need to stop holding pigs accountable to gravity and start expecting them to fly. Women are never going to be logical; they are always going to make decisions on emotion. And I'm glad! That's why I don't need to be rich, handsome or fit to get women. The only competition I need to win is the one for one girl's emotions. And I damn well ought to win, because I should know her better than anybody. If another guy did ever happen to beat me at that game, he would be making her happier than me, and if you cared about someone enough to be with them in the first place, you should be happy they're happy. With that attitude, there is no outcome that justifies fear or insecurity, and you escape what we agree is a leading cause of breakups.

 

[speed dawg]

That's like saying we need to stop holding pigs accountable to gravity and start expecting them to fly. Women are never going to be logical; they are always going to make decisions on emotion.

Women are human. Women are people. They aren't aimless animals meandering around 100% at the mercy of their emotions. More so than men? Obviously, that's the difference in masculinity and femininity. But the ability to use good judgement is exactly what separates the quality from the non-quality, in men and women.

 

[Colossus]

Women are human. Women are people. They aren't aimless animals meandering around 100% at the mercy of their emotions. More so than men? Obviously, that's the difference in masculinity and femininity. But the ability to use good judgement is exactly what separates the quality from the non-quality, in men and women.

Totally agree. I have to remind myself of this from time to time. When you become too entrenched in Game you start to look at women as almost sub-human; or another species. They aren't, they are just our human counterparts.

Women tend to be better at certain types of skills such as subtlety/subterfuge, social intelligence, and intuition (coming to a correct conclusion based on subconscious factors rather than intentional reasoning).

They lack, however, the ability to be introspective, systematically objective, and prospective in their thinking. They very much let things 'happen' to them, and rationalize it afterwards. That's why I think men make better leaders and decision-makers; because we excel at these types of thinking and make more reliable evidence-based decisions.

I think it's an oversimplification to just say "women make all decisions with their feelings." They do, but not to such an extreme degree that they shouldn't be held accountable for irrationality and stupidity like the rest of the adult world.

 

[CostaDeSol]

4. Preferably a virgin, or single digit partners.

I’ve talked about this at length in other threads and my blog, but I cannot overemphasize the value of finding a girl who has NEVER had another man before you. Not only is she physically untainted, but her ability to bond with you is undiluted and pure. You can teach her sexually and never worry about her having hang-ups or wonder about her hazy sexual past.
Now, obviously finding a virgin with all these other attributes in this day and age is like finding a needle in a hayfield. The fewer partners the better. Evidence has shown that the more sexual partners a girl has had prior to marriage, the higher the likelihood of marital dissolution. I would suggest <5 partners.

How exactly do you screen for this? I know this has been touched on before multiple times, but i don't think i've yet heard on how you make sure your girl is like this.

btw, i don't want to derail this thread, so if you have any threads that can answer this question just send them over to me

 

[Colossus]

How exactly do you screen for this? I know this has been touched on before multiple times, but i don't think i've yet heard on how you make sure your girl is like this.

btw, i don't want to derail this thread, so if you have any threads that can answer this question just send them over to me

It's an ongoing process. You probably arent going to figure it out in the first 6 or so dates, unless she outright confesses she is a virgin....at which point you should still be skeptical.

Throughout dating women will drop clues to their sexual past. Use a combination of the information she shares and your gut feeling. Never take her professed "number" at face value either; almost every female on earth will understate it.

 

[CostaDeSol]

It's an ongoing process. You probably arent going to figure it out in the first 6 or so dates, unless she outright confesses she is a virgin....at which point you should still be skeptical.

Throughout dating women will drop clues to their sexual past. Use a combination of the information she shares and your gut feeling. Never take her professed "number" at face value either; almost every female on earth will understate it.

I see, but i think its going to be very difficult to know for sure that your girl has been with a low number of men.

 

[soulforge]

wow thats a great list... i wish i had found this forum a couple of years ago.

this is a list i compiled around me ex, and only a year ago i was ready to marry her.

01. age 46

02. 4 kids aged 9, 15, 17, 21

03. 2 different dads, one upto his eye balls paying child support

04. mum was a alcoholic, wore the pants in the relationship & quite agressive

05. dad died at an early age

06. type of guys she goes for, bodybuilders, doormen, club djs

07. does not like to be told what to do by a man, fiercly indepentend & fiery

08. her group of friends, mostly single mothers, drinkers, slags

09.defo cannot depend on, in a crisis situation, probably leave you to rot

marriage material? or future suicide material?

met her on POF case closed