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Were His actions Innocent?

DreamyChick

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What do you think?

I have this guy friend. We have been friends forever it seems and I have never had to worry that he was putting the moves on me because he told me it would never happen because he was only interested as a friend, but now I am wondering if he tried to pull something over on me this past weekend. He invited me over, and not long after I got there, He told me I looked good. He never comments on how I look so I was somewhat surprised. At this point he's just working on typing up some stuff for his grandmother and chatting with me. Not long after he gets bored and puts the stuff away. He's drinking beer and I noticed when I came in he picked up my favorite beer and soda. I am amazed that he remembers ect. I took a 6 months hiatus from him because I liked him more than I wanted to and we had some other issues. When I asked him why he contacted me again He said he realized that us not being friends was stupid and he missed me and knew I missed him. But anyway all the talk doesn't really matter.

Then later he leads the conversation to talk about sex and how far I have gone with a guy. I repeatedly tell him that I am uncomfortable doing so and hes like it's alright by the end of the night you will and true to his word he keeps trying. So finally, I am like I have no interest in sex and don't plan on having it and his eyes got big. Of course I was fibbing but I wanted him to drop the subject. This only futher intrigued him. My innocence always has. He told me I was lying but half believed me so he set out to test me which I totally didn't see coming. He jumps up from his side of the couch and sits next to me puts one hand on the back of my neck and the the other hand on my thigh sort of moving it up a little as a tease.

I was in shock so I couldnt say anything. I immediately felt nervous and he was looking at me. Then I was like see I am not reacting meaning I am not asking him for more and hes like oh but you are. I was trying to play it cool so then he stops and he starts again. This time he put his leg on my leg that he was rubbing and kept rubbing my neck looking at me I blushed. So he was like okay this is my conclusion you got excited your heart rate and breathing increased.

So insisted it was bc I was freaked out that I was in flight response mode and he said well you didn't say anything true at first and then I did and he was like no it excited you. I said but I didn't react. So basically I half way was still able to convince he I wasn't ever going to be interested in having sex with anyone. He kept saying I was in denial and I wanted a romatic relationship and I do but I was trying to get him off the topic and telling him to stop talking about it wasnt getting me anywhere. But guys he was right. I just didn't want him to know how he was getting to me.

But then get this made the mistake of asking for a message and he gave me one two actually before we called it a night.

He didn't kiss me or anything or touch me inappropriately but I get the feeling that if I would have even hinted that I wanted to test our boundaries he would have been up for it. I dont know maybe I am overreacting but when he gave me the massage he was pretty through rubbing me everywhere down my back right to where my waistband was and a little below, no touching on my butt but on my outer hips and inner thighs at one point and somehow I felt like we were still playing with fire. at one point he pulled my shirt up so he could have contact with my skin on my back and said it was so I could get the full effect. But he made it sound very innocent said he gave massages all the time. he gave me another massage before I went home as well. Before I left he hugged me and that was that.

Was this all innocent?
 

uzio

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He wants to bone you.
 

Bloke

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

I'm a moron !

I didn't look at your username & thought you were a dude. :nervous:

:crackup:
 

tosh

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This is absolutely priceless.

Have you ever wondered why girls are so easily led and why escalating rapidly and using Kino works wonders?

This post shows what's going on in a girl's head when you do these things. She's scared, but excited, doesn't know what's happening, and even though she hasn't made up her mind whether she will allow herself to be ****ed, she will go as far as you decide to go.

Just read that again! At no point is there a hint of her having any say in what's happening. She's just watching, waiting for the guy to take it all the way.

I've found this very illuminating. Like seeing into a girl's head. Thanks!

Oh and yeah.. I agree... He wants to bone you.
 

Big Eee Zee

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step back and look at this from someone elses perspective.

you make intelligent posts, so i know you know something about whats happening here.




Of course not!






If anyone else had posted this, you would have said the same thing as me. dont let your personal attachments cloud your perspective,
 

flu

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uzio said:
He wants to bone you.
WHAT?! Noooo... nooooo.
He wants to know you better so he can be a better friend.

No, hell no. Of course he wants to bone you.
 
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DreamyChick, why are you asking guys on a forum to attract women, how to attract guys? It's like asking a girl how to attract another girl. Like a great don juan knows how to get a girl interested, a great woman don juan knows how to get a guy. Let me ask you this? What you are doing on here, lol?
 

Docs

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I love this post. You know you wanted anything he wanted to deliver, hiding behind that mask of 'I'm confused, all weird feely'.

You know you want him ;)
I just didn't want him to know how he was getting to me.
I get the feeling that if I would have even hinted that I wanted to test our boundaries he would have been up for it.
^ - Not really, you just held back. You know damn well if you really wanted to kiss him, or he kissed you.... it works both ways.
 

spider_007

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The minute he grabed your inner tie, you should have stud up and told him "that's enough"....that's if you really wanted him to stop.

oh and ya, ofcourse he wants to bone you. That's a stupid quiestion.
 

DJDamage

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This is clearly a guy with an agenda that is trying to hook up and bone you (no surprise there).

What he is doing (i did this back in my AFC days when i had a girl-"friend") is slowly but surley increasing kino (touching) from non sexual to sexual. He is doing it slowly because he doesn't want to scare you off (he is hoping that as you get comfortable to his touch he can advance in territory). Don't be surprised if next time he would start "massaging" you and his hand accidenlty hit your breasts or he would start kissing you on the neck, hoping that this will turn you on and you two are going to fvck.

DJD
 

Slique

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Nope, not an innocent act at all.

You know the song "Bump and Grind"? (by R Kelly I think), well that's what it reminds me of.

"My mind's telling me 'no', but my body's telling me 'yes'"

Maybe you guys should talk further? Perhaps something good might come out of it.
 

Faded Image

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DonJuanForever said:
DreamyChick, why are you asking guys on a forum to attract women, how to attract guys? It's like asking a girl how to attract another girl. Like a great don juan knows how to get a girl interested, a great woman don juan knows how to get a guy. Let me ask you this? What you are doing on here, lol?
The priciples work the same playa. What is preached on this board is actually the things that my X-Wife was doing to me which caused me fall head over heels in love with her. When she kicked me to the curb, it only made want her more and I went through the extreme to get her back (never did). Once you realize how the science of this sh*t works, you should be able to answer questions whether it's from a man or a women.

Oh by the way DreamyChick, If I was him, your post would have been titled "How can I get him off my mind" lol.
 

SamePendo

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Hows your uncle?
The reason for your hiatus is. . . ? Good to see you.

Yeah he wants sex.
 

far from average

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DreamyChick said:
...I took a 6 months hiatus from him because I liked him more than I wanted to and we had some other issues.


But guys he was right. I just didn't want him to know how he was getting to me.


But then get this made the mistake of asking for a message and he gave me one two actually before we called it a night.

[Is it all just innocent?]
Do you mean to tell me that you have read this forum enough to post over four hundred times, and you're still asking that question? Explain to me a few things:

1. What were your other issues?

2. Do you want to have sex with him? It sure sounds like you do.

3. Why was the massage a mistake?

What is actually going on here? What do you really truly want out of this? Are you afraid of something?
 

DreamyChick

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Answers

far from average said:
Do you mean to tell me that you have read this forum enough to post over four hundred times, and you're still asking that question? Explain to me a few things:

1. What were your other issues?

2. Do you want to have sex with him? It sure sounds like you do.

3. Why was the massage a mistake?

What is actually going on here? What do you really truly want out of this? Are you afraid of something?

QUOTE=far from average]Do you mean to tell me that you have read this forum enough to post over four hundred times, and you're still asking that question? Explain to me a few things:

1. What were your other issues?

2. Do you want to have sex with him? It sure sounds like you do.

3. Why was the massage a mistake?

What is actually going on here? What do you really truly want out of this? Are you afraid of something?[/QUOTE]

1.What are my issues? Let's see. For starters like I said I never thought we'd wind up in this situation, because when he knew I wanted him he didn't want me. He just wanted to be friends. If I want to be with someone I want the total package but he brags about being with all these girls like you all do. He told me we'd never happen. So in away I assumed I was safe to be attracted to him from a distance. I am innocent compared to most girls he dates, but he's always talking to me about how I need to experiment. But I want to be able to trust in a guy that he's looking out for me and not just looking out for himself. There is also a major problem with what he pulled that night. He won't talk about the girl I've seen him out with. I wanted him but I restrained myself because I don't know the status with her. I don't want to be the girl that sneaks around. I don't want him to know how much effect he had on me that night. I suspect that he was teasing me. But yet I felt like in a lot of ways he was wanting me to communicate verbally about what I wanted but I wasn't going to do that given the circumstances.

2. If circumstances changed and I felt like he really cared for me I'd probably sleep with him so yes.

3. The massage was a mistake because I really liked it and I felt guilty given the circumstances.

Again, I never thought I'd be placed in the situation where it was like wow this isn't adding up I don't think his actions are innocent. I value our friendship more and I am scared to open myself up to him like that especially when I don't know how he really feels about me.
 

DreamyChick

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tosh said:
This is absolutely priceless.

Have you ever wondered why girls are so easily led and why escalating rapidly and using Kino works wonders?

This post shows what's going on in a girl's head when you do these things. She's scared, but excited, doesn't know what's happening, and even though she hasn't made up her mind whether she will allow herself to be ****ed, she will go as far as you decide to go.

Just read that again! At no point is there a hint of her having any say in what's happening. She's just watching, waiting for the guy to take it all the way.

I've found this very illuminating. Like seeing into a girl's head. Thanks!

Oh and yeah.. I agree... He wants to bone you.
Right on Tosh. He had me very curious about how far he was going to push the boundaries but then he did a lot of holding back too like he was waiting for me to ask for more. So I got really confused at the same time so that's why I came on the board asking were his actions innocent bc I am after all inexperienced and didn't really trust my gut. He was very subtle with everything so it was kind of hard to read him.
 

SamePendo

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:cry: Did you guys notice how she ignored me?
 
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