Building the Bullpen

[prosemont]

Baseball and women are the American man's favorite past-times. For obvious reasons, every DJ should concentrate on having several women (relievers) in play concurrently. I call this building the bullpen. Here is your roster:

1. The Starter. We are always looking for the starter, the one who we're going to pitch regularly, the one that builds our confidence and in whom we're confident. Our shining star if you will. One that will lead to or is a LTR. And, until the ring goes on (or even after it does depending on your make-up) you'll want to have an assortment of go-to relievers for specific or general usage.

2. The Strong Reliever. The strong reliever is the kind of woman with whom you actually become friends and with whom you build an honest, caring, and sexual relationship. You recognize the strong reliever because she cares about you and vice-versa and usually is very sexual. This is the type of woman with whom you have a LTR as friends with benefits, someone who may have her own LTR relationships and who knows you have yours, but the level of trust is such that neither of you would ever interfere with the other in this regard; but, rather protect and cover for each other if the need arises.

3. The Middle Reliever. The knuckle-baller, curve-baller, sinker-slider, junk-baller. This is the category where most of the women in your bullpen will fall. This is the masses. Women you choose for various reasons to fill various needs and desires. Some may make great sex partners. Some are understanding and not bad in bed. Some have great chests, some great behinds, some great eyes, lips, or the like. Some may just be cool to hang out with. Some may have money or prestige. Or you just have a great connection. These are also the ones that are easily cast aside. You don't mind losing these at all. Take 'em or leave 'em. This category, as a class, aids you in your cool aloofness and self-confidence that allows you not to be a AFC, even with your starter or closer herein mentioned.

4. The Closer. This is your 8 or 9 or the girl who fvcks you like you've never been before. This is the stuff of passion, but also the stuff that does not meet the requirements of becoming a starter. She might be too high-maintenance, too b*tchy, too selfish, too nutty, too ... whatever. But, she's a great ride. This is the type of woman that can come in, under pressure, and throw 100 mph fast-balls for an inning or two but cannot hold out much longer. Most closers don't have much endurance nor do you want or expect them to, which is why they don't make LTR material. Your middle relievers are key to giving you the objectivity to not rely too heavily on the closer and misleading yourself into thinking that the closer might be LTR material when you know damn well that could be dangerous or problematic.

Live well, my brothers, and seek to continually build yourself a large, well-rounded bullpen. Always look for women on waivers, make trades, and continue scouting for more and better talent.

[drixsa]

nice, this has been the story of my summer

[Don_Marko]

BUMP!

This is a good post

[Six-String Samurai]

Wow, can't believe I missed this thread the first time around... this is great stuff. I love analogies that really make sense like this one.

[Create Reality]

Good idea, though it sounds like it takes a LOT of effort to pull off successfully. Eg. Remembering names, Numbers. But mainly Time Management. This sounds like a style more suited to an experienced player then our average 21-year-old.

I bet it's a ****load of fun

[pimp in training]

i have a brunette ill trade you for a blonde

[disciple]

It's starting to cold here in New York and I'm focusing on building my winter line-up of chicks.

I'm holding team tryouts right now. LOL!!!!!!!

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by pimp in training
i have a brunette ill trade you for a blond

I have a bunch of blonds, I'll trade ya'. I'll trade double for brunette Latina with bodacious ta-tas!

[Rob]

that hit's home.

BUMP

[RiceHapa888]

I'm building my bullpen right now- I have a starter, closer and middle reliever but I need a strong reliever........

[jiza101]

I guess i would understand it better if i played baseball

[FunnyCide]

love the analogies man, the same could be applied to a conversation tip.

I made some off season trades to dump the huge salaries for pitchers with heart. I think I'll have a shot for the world series title next season

[squirrels]

I love this tip.

[blueangel83]

HAAAHAAAHAAHAHAHAHA HA HA HA!

This is too funny.

[ShizamDaMan]

Rockin good sports analogy. I need to get it in gear for spring training

[MightyMate]

Dope post. I have no 4th point atm. Even tho my point 1 is like 4. But its LTR so..
Imma fix it!

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Bumping because it is a d@mn good analogy.

[brosnake]

This is easily my favorite tip ever. If everything in life was boiled down to a baseball analogy I would be a whole lot smarter. Heh, now that I think about it, I got a righty coming outta the pen and onto the mound in about 10 minutes.

I think I'm gonna nickname all my girls after real baseball players. I know a Latina that would fit the nickname 'K-rod' real well.

[Permission]

This is the best tip on this forum. 5 stars.