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Old 10-13-2011, 02:59 PM   #1
Zarky
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Question erg.. how to nicely dump some single moms

So I found two recently divorced single moms on POF that I wanted to pump and dump to help earn my 40x40 (40 women fvcked by the age of 40) badge. The pumping worked out fine, the only problem now is dumping them.

They're really nice and one even has started having her puss lasered hairless to make her more attractive to men, so I don't want to be too cruel. It's a great puss BTW.

They're texting me all day long and it's really getting on my nerves and interfering with my time with my two real girlfriends. But they're so... well.. pathetic and really quite decent to me that I don't really want to crush their souls even more than they've already been crushed.

One found out her husband was cheating and divorced him. At least that's what she says. The other... I'm not sure her story. But they're both rather bitter divorces and they're fighting over stupid sh!t like a cat. Literally. The one chick hates her husband so much that she's fighting him in court over custody of a cat. They've spent $thousands on lawyer fees for this cat.

Anybody have some decent ways of dumping these broads without making new life enemies?
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Old 10-13-2011, 03:04 PM   #2
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You just have to do it politely but directly. Of course they're going to feel bad, but that's life. These women I'm sure broke plenty of hearts in their salad days. Try not to get wrapped up in how bad things are for them - they're going to get over you eventually.
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Old 10-13-2011, 03:34 PM   #3
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Think of them giving the LJBF card to dozens and dozens of nice guys at high school or them dont picking up the phone cause the guy wasnt cool enough.

Think of them being responsible for their condition istead of being victims of fate.
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Old 10-13-2011, 04:17 PM   #4
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NICEly....stop it!

if you need to, end it, they will take solace in calling you every name under the sun to their friends, you will be Hitlers darkest shadow by the weekend, dont worry about it, its always your fault
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Old 10-13-2011, 04:22 PM   #5
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Thanks guys I appreciate it. I had to dump a few younger single chicks back in '08 when I was dating like 6 at a time and I didn't really have much of a problem with it.

But these chicks are so pathetic it's like punching a sick dog in the face.
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Old 10-13-2011, 04:23 PM   #6
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I would advise to never lead a woman on in the promise of a relationship or monogamous commitment in order to secure sex. You wouldn't want that done to you. There are plenty of women out there that are just looking to hook up or date casually that it shouldn't be necessary to resort to toying with somebody's emotions in order to get laid.
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Old 10-13-2011, 04:44 PM   #7
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thanks for taking the opportunity to give us a morality lecture. It's really not related to my situation because I don't promise anybody anything.
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Old 10-13-2011, 04:53 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zarky
thanks for taking the opportunity to give us a morality lecture. It's really not related to my situation because I don't promise anybody anything.

Did you let them know you only wanted to "pump and dump" them and had no interest in them beyond sex?

There's a lot of complaints on here about women we encounter being selfish, entitled, etc, and rightly so. Based on your description of their behavior, they certainly seem to be under the impression that more than sex was on the table. Whose fault is that? Yours or theirs? If you made it clear you wanted to only casually date and weren't looking for anything serious, then I don't see you having done anything wrong. Leading people on is wrong, whether it's a man or a woman doing it.
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Old 10-13-2011, 04:57 PM   #9
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There's no easy way to dump women. You just gotta do it. I tried to be as nice as possible to the last woman I dumped. She treated me pretty good, but she got too goddam fat. Lesson learned from that one: NEVER dump a woman while she's in your house. Do it over the phone. I've heard people say that a REAL man dumps a woman in person. That's a woman's opinion. If you dump them over the phone, your 5hit has less of a chance of getting stolen or wrecked.

Just tell them that you don't think you can date her while she's going though her divorce.

Think up the nicest 5hit to say of why you're not working out, and drop it on them. They won't be happy, but you'll be free of them.
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Old 10-13-2011, 05:20 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Findog
There's a lot of complaints on here about women we encounter being selfish, entitled, etc, and rightly so. Based on your description of their behavior, they certainly seem to be under the impression that more than sex was on the table. Whose fault is that? Yours or theirs? If you made it clear you wanted to only casually date and weren't looking for anything serious, then I don't see you having done anything wrong. Leading people on is wrong, whether it's a man or a woman doing it.
Heh. You clearly haven't read my other posts here. Your morals have no influence on my life. I'm completely amoral. Or to put it another way: whatever I do is "right," by the simple fact that I did it. That's my morality. People can dig it or not, I don't give a fvck.

However I recognize that psychology is different than morality, and just because I'm amoral doesn't mean that I have no concept of pain in other creatures. I guess it's more accurate to say that I've made up my own moral code, and on one hand lying to women, and yet on the other hand trying to dump them without causing too much pain, are not incompatible in my own moral system.

But I certainly don't subscribe to any moral code that's outside my own. And mine can change whenever I want it to.

In this case I'm looking to let them down a little bit easy, or at least as easy as possible. I'm thinking I'll tell them that work has picked up and that I'll be too busy for a rel'p. Didn't really convince the younger chicks in '08 but maybe it'll work with these broads.

Quote:
Just tell them that you don't think you can date her while she's going though her divorce.
This isn't a bad idea, but it puts it on them. I'd rather put it on me so she can't come back 2 months from now and say, "I'm all divorced now!"

EDIT: Looks like I hit my 10 posts for today, but I think upon editing this post I answered the post below it. Findog was being somewhat annoying, but on the other hand he/she/it made me think deeply about my own morality. And I realized that I'm not "amoral" but that my code of morals is not like anyone else's. Which is fine by me It also reaffirmed to me that outside codes of morality, be it a religion's, society's, a culture's, or another person's, may have some indirect influence on mine but not much direct influence. I can disregard others' morality with ease, as long as I'm smart enough to conform in such a way that will keep me out of jail or court, etc.

For example, Findog made a blanket statement that "Leading people on is wrong, whether it's a man or a woman doing it." My morality says, "I can lead women on if I want to, though I will try to prevent them from doing it to me as best I can." My morality doesn't assume that what's right for me is ok if everyone did it That's one difference, there are likely many others. But to summarize this post I can say, "Preaching to me about morality is a waste of time, as I do not and will not recognize your morals as being influential upon me if they differ from the ones I already have."

EDIT 2: Interestingly I found this...

"In 1883, Friedrich Nietzsche published a book called Also Sprach Zarathustra in which he elaborated his ethical ideal, the ‹bermensch. The name came from the concept about ordinary humanity believing there would be no morals or reasons to live if there was no Other to define morality and reason. Transcending this illusion makes one an "over-man".

"This was a person, or for us, a character, who rejects the norms of society and lives by his own moral code." From http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Ubermensch
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Last edited by Zarky : 10-13-2011 at 05:56 PM.
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Old 10-13-2011, 05:38 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zarky
Heh. Your morals have no influence on my life.

In this case I'm looking to let them down a little bit easy

You describe these women as "pathetic" and liken them to "sick dogs." Why are you concerned about how they will take being dumped since you don't care about them? You got what you wanted and now they have no more utility to you, so why are you even bothering to ask what's the best way to "let them down easy?" What difference does it make to you?

You can either be upfront about your intentions with people and let them decide whether or not it's worth it to spend time with you, or you can pretend that you want to get to know somebody and go through courtship rituals and then "pump and dump" them once you get what you want. But if you choose the latter, why even bother with the pretense that you want to "let them down easy" and not hurt them? Who are you kidding?

It's a free country and not everybody wants commitment and monogamy. Some people want to play the field and enjoy their freedom. More power to you if you don't want to f*ck only one woman. There's plenty of women out there that are up for casual sex and not looking for a relationship either, so I don't see why it's necessary to get involved with and deceive women that are looking for those things.
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Old 10-13-2011, 06:25 PM   #12
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Dear Zarky,
Well just do Nothing.......They will get fed up with texts that never get replied to and give that silly game away....Human relationships are a bit like Chemical reactions.....You stir the chemicals together in the retort and there is a sense of inevitability even predictability in the result.....That is of course,if you are clever enough to understand the Chemistry involved...Same with people if you have been around long enough,you see the same little games being played out,often with new repetitions,but the theme is the same,the wheel just takes another turn....So your little Affaires de La Coeur are winding towards their conclusions....Napoleon,who I believe Back Breaker also respects,used to say of correspondence...something along the lines of "Unless the matter is of life threatening importance,I leave everything for a Month,by then half of the issues will have sorted themselves out without any intervention on my part,a further quarter will have evolved to situations with an obvious response,and so I am left with a Quarter of the letters needing considered replies".
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Old 10-14-2011, 08:14 AM   #13
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Come on man, your tag line says "I have 15 years experience with this stuff" yet you are asking advice on dumping someone? You know what to do.
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Old 10-14-2011, 09:31 AM   #14
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Go AFC, let them dump you

SH
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Old 10-14-2011, 12:02 PM   #15
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Findog has a point....If all these women are is a piece of ass it should be easy.

tell them on the phone that you are not looking for a relationship whatever you want to do with that..is whatever. Put the ball in their court

Wash your hand sof it..it's easy. I think you have feeling that's why...who are you kidding? you care about them..you f#cked up.
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Old 10-14-2011, 03:18 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zarky
They're texting me all day long and it's really getting on my nerves and interfering with my time with my two real girlfriends. But they're so... well.. pathetic
This is what you run into when you are banging women just to achieve some sort of number for your merit badge. You're banging women you wouldn't otherwise be interested in.
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Old 10-14-2011, 05:02 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zarky
This isn't a bad idea, but it puts it on them. I'd rather put it on me so she can't come back 2 months from now and say, "I'm all divorced now!"

I've never had a woman do that. The most she'd do is message you to say 'hi'. When that happens, you just ignore it.

Quote:
Come on man, your tag line says "I have 15 years experience with this stuff" yet you are asking advice on dumping someone? You know what to do.

I don't care what anybody says, dumping women who have emotional energy invested in you is fvcking difficult. You know they're going to try and hang onto you, and when you don't let them, who knows what they're gonna do.
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Old 10-16-2011, 05:29 PM   #18
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Say 'GTFO!'
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Old 10-16-2011, 10:29 PM   #19
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If you never agreed to an exclusive relationship (which it doesn't sound like you did), I prefer to do it "female style"

Female style is when you communicate your lack of interest by no longer being available to her.

Bottom line is you don't owe either of them an explanation

Oh and divorced women and women going thru a divorce don't qualify as "single moms"
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Old 10-17-2011, 06:46 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SecondHalf
Go AFC, let them dump you

SH

M ight work, but then again at these broads ages, they might thinking he is long for a ltr, or **gulp** marriage!
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