Kissing - Tips and Tactics

[Nine Breaker]

You're finishing up a brilliant date with a knockout babe tonight. You, being the gentleman that you are, are giving her a lift to her home in your car (or walking her home etc..). You finally get to her place, and you realise that you could be in line for a first kiss with this babe...

WHAT DO YOU DO?

Everyone has their own style of kissing - there isn't a "right way" about doing it, although there are things that can make you a BETTER kisser than the rest. Here is a sizable outline of things you can do that will aid you in becoming a tonsil-tennis champion in no time.

1 - WHEN to kiss

[1st Date]: Do not think that you are obligated to kiss a girl at the end of a date. This is never so! Generally, the better the date goes, the better your chance (and the more expectant the woman will be) of getting that first kiss in at the end. You should be able to tell if she is wanting you to kiss her, usually via strong eye contact and kino on her part - increasingly stronger towards the end of the date. Do not be surprised if SHE initiates a kiss, but don't expect her to do so.

[In General]: Don't expect too much macking to happen in public places, since many out there see it as bad manners. When you notice that she will want to kiss you every time you pay her a compliment - that's one of many signs that the two of you are on the road to becoming a real couple.

2 - BEFORE a kiss

Keep your mouth clean! Would you want to kiss your girl, and find half a cow stuck in her teeth? She wouldn't want to find anything in your teeth either. It's more than common courtesy, it's common oral hygene.

Keeping a breath mint or some gum with you can be a handy tactic, but use is right after a meal - and not when you're walking a girl up to her front door. Actions speak louder than words, and that action screams you expect a kiss - and this can be a turn-off for the girl.

3 - SIGNS to make a 1st kiss

[From Her]
--> You and her enjoyed the date immensely.
--> She gives you strong eye contact at the end of the date, accompanied with friendly (yet slightly seductive) smiling.
--> She is using kino on you towards the end.
-->She feels relaxed and safe around you. ie: a strong rapport.
[By You]
--> You do all the above on her.

4 - HOW to kiss

A) Accept the kiss: When you kiss a girl for the first time, don't try any fancy moves or heavy tongue use. You want to see what SHE is going to do, and when she does - you can compliment her mouth movements. While this might not be the best kiss for you, it will certainly be good for her. And when a girl thinks you're a great kisser, you've got her wanting more from you.

B) Length of the kiss: A first kiss probably shouldn't be a long one, unless you've played all your cards right and she is VERY interested in you. Always be ready and willing for her to pull away when she has had enough - you don't want to force her any further than she is willing.

C) Breathing: For an "extended" kiss, try to remeber to breathe!!! Do this through your nose, and try to avoid snorting / wheasing / loud sniffles. And remember that if she suddenly tries to pull back, it might just be to take a breath - so let her be able to pull out. Nobody likes blacking out from a long kiss!!!

D) No slobber!: Wet kisses come from dogs, not people. Generally, if you see the girl you've just kissed wiping her mouth (and possibly even her chin) then you should cut down on the mouth movements and/or tongue.

5 - HANDS and Kissing

Something that many AFC's overlook is that, when you are kissing a woman, you still have hands which can be put into use. Whether that use is good or bad depends upon you, and can ADD to the kiss tremendously.

For a short kiss, you shouldn't have to worry about where the hands go too much. Placing them on her hips or around her back are suitable.

For longer kissing (ie: making out), your hands can make the difference between a waste of time and having your woman going even further for you. If you recall from other sexual-based posts, a woman's body is basically one big sensory centre - you can arouse her via kino relatively easily (hence the success of kino!). Feel free to do some "exploring" with your hands. Rub them up and down her arms, shoulders, her back, her abdomen, and her breasts - but don't spend too much time on the breasts. Like I said before, the whole body is your aim, not just the bouncy bits.

6 - WHERE to Kiss

Whether out in the school yard, hitting the clubs on a saturday night, or simply hanging out at your place, you will find that one simple tactic at any of these places will help you get those lip muscles some exercise - get the two of you alone together.

This isn't always possible, so don't fret at a lack of options, there is always another day (and another girl) When in a situation with people around you (a party or social group, whatever) you'll find that the best way to get the two of you alone is to say something such as "It's too loud here. Let's find somewhere quiet where we can talk" or simply "Can we speak in private?" It isn't great DJ material, but it does the job.

The idea now is to talk with the girl in a situation where it's just the two of you. Talk about whatever the heck you want to, it's your call. Just remember that 70-30 ratio (you know about it, right??) and you're right. What you're looking for is strong eye contact as the conversation flows along. Eventually, the two of you are going to pause talking, and just be staring at eachother. This is THE moment to plant that first kiss! Trust me on that. She'll probably see it coming, and if you've played your cards right, she'll WANT it coming her way.

Now, try to keep the kissing somewhere private. You don't want others (ie: friends and relatives) cutting in and killing your moment. Besides, couples that put on gratuitous "public shows" don't get good points in the reputation department, and it can offend others.

Advanced Kissing Tactics

1/ The Silent Kiss

AIM: To go from talking with your girl, to making out/love.

REQUIREMENTS: This tip assumes a strong degree of rapport between you and "her". Good with a g/f, not with a stranger.

METHOD: Imagine you and her are haing a coffee at home. Keep strong eye contact. Put down your drink, and hers too, without saying a word. Then slowly, but surely, put your arms around her and kiss her. Use your hands to caress her body throughout the kissing, and slowly progress as far as you'd like to go. Take your time.

ADVANTAGES: The strong eye contact is a great show of confidence, and the method in general shows her that you are a strong man - always attractive to women.

2 - The Non-kiss Kiss

AIM: A unique way to first-kiss a girl.

METHOD: Say this: "Hey, I bet you that I can kiss you on the lips without even touching you!"

She is obviously going to be curious as to how you could achieve this one. If she wants you to kiss her, she won't refuse. If she does, leave it at that.

If she agrees, kiss her on the lips - and make it a damned good one! When you're done, simpy say "hmmm, guess I can't".

ADVANTAGES: A way of avoiding any awkward pre-kiss moments for those of you who hate 'em.

[UPDATE]3 - The Hand Kiss

AIM: A simple method that separates you from the pack.

METHOD: Ideal for introductions. When introducing yourself, grasp the woman's hand just after you have spoken and gently kiss her hand (above the knuckles). Be sure to maintain a decent level of eye contact during this move.

ADVANTAGES: One thing that many couples notice is that there was something that made their first meeting "unique", something a little more special than saying "hello" to eachother. This method takes full advantage of this occurance, and can aid in raising interest levels within the first few minutes.


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More tips have and will still be added later on. If you have anything to add on the topic, share the wisdom here!

Take it easy.

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Since the moment of your birth, you have been destined to die. Nothing you can ever do will change this from happening.

However, you CAN change what will happen from now until then, but only if you dare to try.

DO YOU DARE?

[This message has been edited by Nine Breaker (edited 07-13-2002).]

[This message has been edited by Nine Breaker (edited 10-21-2002).]

[This message has been edited by Nine Breaker (edited 10-21-2002).]

[Aztec]

A rudimentary skill every DJ should possess.

Excellent job!

[Vatican]

Ah, I love suddenly changing from teasing/funny mode into serious/passionate mode. Love that transition. If you've ever done it you'll know what I mean.

[Lilredplaya]

Ah, I love suddenly changing from teasing/funny mode into serious/passionate mode. Love that transition. If you've ever done it you'll know what I mean.

Ha, I feel ya man, I know exactly what you mean. I think you should go post this is the Highschool forum. Many of the kids there have been questioning this exact topic, ie. kissing, when to, etc.
Excellent post.

If you give me permission, Ill do it for you.. Giving you full credit of course. http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/smile.gif

[This message has been edited by Lilredplaya (edited 07-03-2002).]

[bartender]

I need this. I'm still a lousy kisser. Thanks 9Breaker.

[zinc]

The slobber thing, that just apply to a first date? I find it extremely arousing when somebody really goes for it, like kissing right around the outskirts of the mouth with a lot of tounge.

I hope they feel the same... otherwise I've been messing up. Again: this isn't on a first kiss? Thoughts?

[Vatican]

Go ahead, Lilplaya

I hereby renounce all rights to anything posted by me anywhere on sosuave.com in the past, present, and future. Do with it what you will.

I just went out with a chick that pushes her whole face against me when she kisses. WTF???

[Lilredplaya]

Thanks, Ill do it. Very good post.

-Red

[lot]

maaaan, i don't really know... so i will ask,,
i don;t know if i am a good kisser.. i really don't, well i belive that you can kiss better with some girls, don;t knw.. my opinion
i heard about guys who sad that this girl\s kiss sucks, and from others that she rulez.. so, is hard to tell
whatever, i am not very sure about the lips ,when your tounges are in contact, what is the best way to do it..? if u know what i mean, if u don;t.. well... this is it, i can't explain better

[Nine Breaker]

Well Lot, that isn't really something I'm able to help you with.

Let me explain...

It IS entirely possible to be a good AND bad kisser. It all comes down to each person's personal opinion about kissing - how they like to do it, and how they like to receive it. This means that you're never going to become a "perfect" kisser. You'll always have some girl who doesn't like how you do it.

Kissing is as unique as each person on this planet. Everyone has their own "way" of doing it. There isn't a "right" or a "wrong" way of doing it, but there are ways to be a more appealing kisser. This is what I have tried to outline in the initial post.

I do understand what you're trying to say. In the end, it all comes down to your own style of kissing, which is something that nobody can kiss you. The best advice I can give you is to try to kiss the way you'd like to be kissed in return.

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Lilredplaya, if you'd like to post this in the HS forum, then you are free to do so. Just keep in mind that I do intend to update this post every now and then, so it might be better just to direct the young 'uns this way instead.

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Zinc, "the slobber thing" is something that you should generally go by, but once you and a girl are comfortable with eachother and like that way of kissing - then go for it. I find that since most women aren't big on slobber, it's wise to hold back on it for a bit. Especially on a 1st kiss!

Take it easy.

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Since the moment of your birth, you have been destined to die. Nothing you can ever do will change this from happening.

However, you CAN change what will happen from now until then, but only if you dare to try.

DO YOU DARE?

[Nine Breaker]

Updates have been added to the thread.

Be sure to read "HANDS and kissing" and advice on The Hand Kiss.

Happy reading.

[Pro]

I have only really kissed one girl I thought was a Great kisser. I have had some evil kissers as well, but like was mentioned kisses are all about opinions and what you like. Most of the girls I got with like that I didn't really see as great kissers, but they weren't that bad and hey, I was kissing hot chicks. It was cool. http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/smile.gif

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"If you do something, you'll reap rewards."

"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face" -Eleanor Roosevelt

[oreo_renegade]

now i have a question, where do u kiss?

i mean like at work, skool, dates, dances, etc.

and do u necesaily have to date the perosn to kiss them? i have a couple of chicks that i could kiss, but they are friends lol

also this one time me and htis one chicks were looking in each otehres eyes, and i wanted to kiss her so bad, this was in class by the way, and i tihnk she felt the same thing, cuz she sorta leaned at me and moved her head to the side, but then blushed and went on back lol
she had a bf too, i think she membered him lol

neway, im a kissing virgin, so thats why im asking where u can kiss, cuz im not allowed to get out of hte house, to do anything, ever, ive left my house like 2 times without my parents in the past 7yrs, and abut 6times withthem in the past 7yrs(or with supervision, to a friends house to do homework.)

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"... I'm tensed a bit,
and tempted,
when I see the sins,
my friends commit,
I'm infinite... "-EMINEM

[Nine Breaker]

Originally posted by oreo_renegade:
now i have a question, where do u kiss?

i mean like at work, skool, dates, dances, etc.

and do u necesaily have to date the perosn to kiss them? i have a couple of chicks that i could kiss, but they are friends lol

I have added a new section, entitled Where To Kiss in the main article above, under point 6, to answer your question Oreo_Renegade. That should help you (and others) out. Happy Reading.

To answer your second question, no. You don't need to date a girl to kiss her. As long as you can tell she wants to be kissed from you, that's all you need. But then, that's an entirely different topic. Make sure you are certain that the girl wants to do "that sorta thing" with you (read up on tips and the DJB to know more) because you run the risk of ruining a friendship.

That old phrase "Friends that play together, stay together" isn't always true, y'know.

------------------
Since the moment of your birth, you have been destined to die. Nothing you can ever do will change this from happening.

However, you CAN change what will happen from now until then, but only if you dare to try.

DO YOU DARE?

[mystik]

what do u do when ur gf doesnt mind kissing in public but you do? such as that we'd be in a group chatting and she just suddenly turns and want a kiss?
for me i feel that its bad manners because it makes those around us feel awkward, but she loves it.

[Raoul]

I'm a bit late reading this, but it's still a great post. Thanks Nine Breaker!

One thing I would add though : If you're with the chick you want to smooch in a group, and you've basically been kinoing each other and she's been making eyes at you, a good line to use to get her in private is this :

Once we've been flirting heavily or whatnot, I'll simply give a cocky smile (something like a devilish grin) and just whisper to her "Let's go for a walk". No asking, no nothing, just that line, then take her hand and start walking off.

The great thing about this is that we'll actually BE taking a walk, and while the manner you delivered the line makes it seem that you're going to smooch, you're acting cocky and funny and she's not sure what to really expect. Then when the oppourtunity presents itself (usually during more kino - like tickling) you go for the smooch. It's also advatageous because if you've wandered off far enough, you can continue with making out if there's no one else about.

- Raoul

[Tryin to Grow a Chin]

Everytime you go out on a 'date' you are feeding the Feminazi/AFC war machine.

Don't go on dates. 'Hang out' and seduce her instead.

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"Chivalry isn't dead; it just smells AFC." - Tryin to Grow a Chin

[a denial]

About time someone put on a kissing thread.
Thanks

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It's not what they take away from you that counts.It's what you do with what you have left.

There is only one sucess-to live your life in your own way.

[Ivan Drago]

Originally posted by Tryin to Grow a Chin:
Everytime you go out on a 'date' you are feeding the Feminazi/AFC war machine.

T2GC, I've noticed you have been using this "Feminazi/AFC war machine" term in all your latest posts while I doubt you have any idea what you are talking about.

I have dated a few feminists and they have very little in common with AFCs. For instance, feminists prefer to pay for themselves while AFCs believe men should pay on dates.

Another thing is that most feminists hate "The Rules", while "The Rules" could only work on AFCs. Other feminists hate men to begin with so they wouldn't have anything to do with AFCs in the first place.

I am not sticking up for feminists or AFCs here but I see no reason how these two can be grouped together. Care to explain?

By the way, does your screen name imply you are trying to look like Jay Leno http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/biggrin.gif Please explain that too