question about friendship with other males in a competitive world

[rocco]

This is just something I wrote in my blog tonight. I went to a party to see old friends I haven't seen in a long time. We had some, I guess you can say, some "bad blood" between us in the past mostly because of conflicting ways we viewed our friendship I think. I thought they might have changed but I don't think they have. Although this is not necessarily a dating question, but more of a friendship question.. I was wondering if It was in my best interest to have this kind of point of view about what friendships really mean? Or am I out of sync with how the world really works?

That town is filled with snobs. always competing who has the most materialistic wealth, and (what they consider) the "coolest" friends. watch out for back stabbers. They are all so catty towards eachother too. glad i'm not engulfed in that sphere of influence anymore. Hanging out with them, left a bad taste in my mouth a day later. Obviously there are some trust issues I have with them. I tried though.

I should not leave my defenses down with these type of people. They have a very "game" mentality atleast from what I've seen when they are in their groups. I on the otherhand came with a very down to earth mentality, which is probably not a safe way of approaching this type of group dynamic. Instead of going to see old friends, it was like going to a job interview as I was meticulously, in a very sly way, checked off as being "not one of them." After reflecting on the event, That is the vibe I felt from them.

Just had to write this down, and put this issue to rest in words. Now I can focus on what's really important, my goals.

[samspade]

You're selective about the women in your life, why wouldn't you be selective about the men in your life?

Don't suffer fools. No one is making you hang out with people whose priorities are not in synch with yours.

I live in a metro area of 20 million people, and although I have dozens upon dozens of friendly acquaintances, I can count on one hand the people I would truly call "close friends." You need a filtering process for ALL of your relationships - not just the romantic ones.

[Warrior74]

Social groups always look for the outcast. The true nature of that group is in how they deal with him when they find him, and that's usually up to the alpha leader of the group. If he lets that person be ostricized, then that's what kind of people they are, if he opens up and invites the person in...they become kinder people. I've seen it everywhere from the hood, raves, corporate functions and social events. People really are sheep you know. They follow the leader.

Those people aren't friends. They are aquaintences at best, enemies at worse. True friends try to bring you up in the world regardless of what other people think.