Gawd, get a load of some of these sad and especially ignorant replies in this thread. Are we men or boys, gentlemen? It seems the latter. Inform yourselves.
Having said that,
joe, you could have done a search on the web. Plenty of sources available with good info on the subject.
Cold sores are caused by variants of the herpes virus family, called herpes simplex. Herpes simplex resides in the human nervous system, and that's how it survives in a human host. For people with cold sores, the virus lies dormant in a facial nerve near the nose.
That means once you're infected, you'll never get rid of it because there are no vaccines. The only thing to "prevent" outbreak are inhibitors that prevent spreading. These are salves you smear on a beginning cold sore, when there are no blisters yet. It slows down viral reproduction.
Even when treated, said blisters may occur. These are filled with a fluid that contain the herpes simplex virus. It is especially this fluid that's highly contagious. Contact with it causes instant infection, also "down there". So, you can develop genital herpes, for example, if someone with cold sores gives you oral sex and viral particles come in direct contact with your skin down there. (That doesn't mean that using a condom or any other protection will make it safe! On the contrary. See further below.) Beating your meat when YOU have the sores is also dangerous; you can give yourself genital herpes.
However, it's not just the blisters that are dangerous. You also risk infection during the pre-blisters period, when there's some red swelling where blisters are going to form, and during post-blisters period, when there are scabs. You risk infection during any of these periods, if you come in skin-to-skin contact with these spots.
So, DON'T kiss a person with cold sores, or even when the outbreak is starting (red swelling) or healing (scabs). DON'T let them perform oral sex on you, not even with condoms or protection. None at all, just to be safe. DON'T beat your meat, if you have them.
Now, people who carry the virus aren't filthy people, to be avoided like lepers, like some try to suggest. Yeah, when they've got the sores you should avoid contact with their face, drinking glasses and utensils they use. But once the sores are completely gone, they're normal people again like you and can be touched and kissed as at will.
Also, when someone has cold sores on their face it doesn't automatically mean that they have genital herpes too. Sores and herpes are caused by the same viral family, but having cold sores does not mean you have "herpes". That's the reason they make the distinction between "herpes" and cold sores.
Cold sores occur occasionally, not all the time. Usually after periods of stress, exhaustion, or when your immune system has suffered a blow due to medication or illness. Hence the name
cold sores. It's usually a side effect of being ill, as the virus sees its chance to strike when the immune system is already occupied. (In my language the name for the sores includes our word for fever, for example.) Events like sunburn are also know to facilitate an outbreak of the virus. The skin is fatigued and the virus strikes.
Some people have cold sores once or twice a year, others once every decade, and yet others never get them, despite being a carrier. Just like some people are ill often, and some never. Every person and body is different, so your mileage may vary.
Lastly, don't poke fun of the sores. People feel bad enough already for having ugly blisters or scabs around their mouth or nose because somewhere in their lives they simply kissed or got kissed by a person who had them and they weren't aware of what they were, or the carrier was ignorant. Usually the person who infected them was a loved one. I carry the virus and I got it from my grandmother when I was a few months old baby. She felt it okay to kiss me despite her having scabs and despite my mother protesting. Thanks grandma!
Some facts:
- An estimate of 50-90% of the population is infected with the virus, depending on country. That means good luck to those who feel they shouldn't get into a relationship with person who carries herpes simplex. It could easily be you. And who knows? Maybe you're a carrier too. You just never had an outbreak. Very well possible.
- Yes, herpes simplex is a Sexually Transferable Disease. It's not AIDS, or gonorrea or genital herpes though. Don't stigmatize it. Especially because a lot of people are carriers, usually due to no fault of their own.
- The virus was probably spread so widely in times when standards of living and hygiene were much lower than now (like the Middle Ages and before that), and when knowledge about virusses and infection vectors were limited to non-existant. I.e. we have our ancestors to thank for it.
Some tips:
- It's best to avoid any contact with the face, drinking glasses and utensils of any person with cold sores until they're fully healed. If the person with sores is your partner, make sure he or she doesn't touch the location of the outbreak and have them wash their hands frequently.
- No kissing.
- No oral sex from the person with the sores. Not even when using protection. Just to be safe.
- Don't beat your meat if you have the sores. You CAN give yourself genital herpes down there.
- Healing usually takes about two to three weeks.
- Consult your doctor if you're unsure of what to do.
It's safe to date someone with cold sores and it's also safe to treat them as a normal person instead of a leper. Just don't kiss, face cuddle or share food, drinks and utensils. And make sure your date deals with his/her sores responsibly (i.e. washing hands thouroughly before holding them with you) so you know he/she is conscious about the dangers and can be expected to act responsibly towards you. In fact, someone who is aware and responsible will either tell you upfront to postpone the date, or inform you of these things before or during the date. If they don't, be careful.
Disclaimer:
I'm no medical professional and you should not take the above info for granted or authoritive. Consult with your local medical healthcare professional if you want to be certain about how to deal wisely with cold sores.
