ex-girlfriend's gifts to me

DJArlington · 08-02-2008, 05:23 PM

my ex gave me a ton of cards (like she wrote 100+ cards over three years, etc.) and DVDs etc. All that **** reminds me of her - can I just throw it out? She said she did not want me to throw the stuff out and instead just ship it all to her (she lives on the other side of the country). I dont care either way, just wanted to get your opinions on this.

samspade · 08-02-2008, 06:39 PM

It's not her prerogative, it's yours. She gave you those things as gifts. If you want to be civil and ship them to her because she can't live without reminders of you (even though you couldn't care less about them), it's not such a big deal and costs a few bucks. If you honestly don't give a f*** about her, it's up to you to throw it all out. That can be very therapeutic.

If the DVDs were gifts, they're yours. If they're on loan, just send 'em back.

I might add, if you're thinking about tossing everything, you might just put it in a box and put the box in the basement or the back of the closet for a while. People throw things out when they're pissed and later regret it.

STR8UP · 08-02-2008, 06:57 PM

The past is the past. Why would you want to hold onto all of that stuff?

My last LTR took it upon herself to use a whole pad of post-it notes to write "I love you" "I miss you" "I'm sorry" and stick them in every last nook and cranny of all of my possessions.

It's been three years and I STILL find those stupid things from time to time. If I ever get a live-in gf again I'm gonna have to explain the situation up front cause who knows how many of those things are still around.

Warrior74 · 08-02-2008, 07:14 PM

I got a box with old letters from girls all the way back from highschool. But do what you want. who cares what she wants. Its on you.

DJDamage · 08-02-2008, 08:25 PM

Throw the cards to the trash and sell the DVD's or give them away to someone.

Da Realist · 08-04-2008, 10:19 AM

Keep them and do what you want with them unless it's something she has to pay for or its part of some written agreement. If she wants something to remember you by, she should be coming to beg you to take her back.

SharpGame · 08-04-2008, 12:48 PM

If the DVD's suck, give them away. If they're good keep them. As for the cards, I'd put them in a box and tuck them away somewhere you won't see them for a few years. No sense throwing away memories. You might enjoy reading them when you're older.

FM 3321 · 08-04-2008, 06:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DJArlington

my ex gave me a ton of cards (like she wrote 100+ cards over three years, etc.) and DVDs etc. All that **** reminds me of her - can I just throw it out? She said she did not want me to throw the stuff out and instead just ship it all to her (she lives on the other side of the country). I dont care either way, just wanted to get your opinions on this.

It looks like you do care hence this thread. I wouldn't pay money to ship that crap to her. Why did you guys break up in the first place? It happens to all of us but it looks like you still have deep feelings for her.

Jitterbug · 08-04-2008, 07:11 PM

If the break-up was amicable then I'd ship them back to her. If not, burn them.

When I read the thread title, I thought you got some other kind of "gifts" from your ex.

DJArlington · 08-05-2008, 10:44 PM

It's a long and complicated relationship, we've been on and off for years for various reasons. I do want to commit to her but my family hates her guts and they'll pretty much go nuts if get back together with her (but honestly that's the least of my concerns); additionally, I've had doubts about her because she kept in touch with ex-boyfriends but looking back may be i overreacted. i don't know what's going on anymore. she the type of person who keeps in touch with everyone that was in her life, including ex's so it always put me in a weird position. when we started dating, she flew cross country to say goodbye to one of the guys she previously dated before me, but then she and this guy sometimes email each other - it's all innocent stuff in the emails (i've seen them) - but it bugs me that they are still in touch. i come from the attitude that an ex is an ex, don't stay in touch what's the freaking point. shoot me now.

womann · 08-06-2008, 07:51 AM

I can remember fist glancing through it amazed at the number of women this man has amassed throughout the decade. Even more so to my amazement was the fact he was able to get all of his women to unclad themselves for his photo-lens. Not an easy task for a novice. At any rate, a great collage of his triumphs and tribulations in the young age of the seventies, how love has effected his art, the times, and women in general. I was sold on the story. I believed it till the last page.

08-02-2008, 05:23 PM	#1
DJArlington Don Juan Join Date: Jul 2002 Age: 35 Posts: 156	ex-girlfriend's gifts to me my ex gave me a ton of cards (like she wrote 100+ cards over three years, etc.) and DVDs etc. All that **** reminds me of her - can I just throw it out? She said she did not want me to throw the stuff out and instead just ship it all to her (she lives on the other side of the country). I dont care either way, just wanted to get your opinions on this.

08-02-2008, 07:14 PM	#4
Warrior74 Master Don Juan Join Date: Mar 2008 Age: 38 Posts: 4,786	I got a box with old letters from girls all the way back from highschool. But do what you want. who cares what she wants. Its on you. __________________ Confirmation bias is the biggest problem on this board. Be more like scientist and less like religious zealots. Belief is not enough. It never was and never will be.

08-02-2008, 08:25 PM	#5
DJDamage Master Don Juan Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Canada Posts: 5,674	Throw the cards to the trash and sell the DVD's or give them away to someone. __________________ Nice breakdown on how to talk with hot women: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zorEMHb3o0Y

08-02-2008, 06:39 PM	#2
samspade Master Don Juan Join Date: Jan 2008 Age: 37 Posts: 2,284	It's not her prerogative, it's yours. She gave you those things as gifts. If you want to be civil and ship them to her because she can't live without reminders of you (even though you couldn't care less about them), it's not such a big deal and costs a few bucks. If you honestly don't give a f*** about her, it's up to you to throw it all out. That can be very therapeutic. If the DVDs were gifts, they're yours. If they're on loan, just send 'em back. I might add, if you're thinking about tossing everything, you might just put it in a box and put the box in the basement or the back of the closet for a while. People throw things out when they're pissed and later regret it.

08-04-2008, 10:19 AM	#6
Da Realist Master Don Juan Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Memphis, TN Posts: 807	Keep them and do what you want with them unless it's something she has to pay for or its part of some written agreement. If she wants something to remember you by, she should be coming to beg you to take her back.

08-04-2008, 12:48 PM	#7
SharpGame Don Juan Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Wisconsin Age: 37 Posts: 82	If the DVD's suck, give them away. If they're good keep them. As for the cards, I'd put them in a box and tuck them away somewhere you won't see them for a few years. No sense throwing away memories. You might enjoy reading them when you're older.

08-04-2008, 07:11 PM	#9
Jitterbug Master Don Juan Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Australia Age: 30 Posts: 3,117	If the break-up was amicable then I'd ship them back to her. If not, burn them. When I read the thread title, I thought you got some other kind of "gifts" from your ex.

08-05-2008, 10:44 PM	#10
DJArlington Don Juan Join Date: Jul 2002 Age: 35 Posts: 156	It's a long and complicated relationship, we've been on and off for years for various reasons. I do want to commit to her but my family hates her guts and they'll pretty much go nuts if get back together with her (but honestly that's the least of my concerns); additionally, I've had doubts about her because she kept in touch with ex-boyfriends but looking back may be i overreacted. i don't know what's going on anymore. she the type of person who keeps in touch with everyone that was in her life, including ex's so it always put me in a weird position. when we started dating, she flew cross country to say goodbye to one of the guys she previously dated before me, but then she and this guy sometimes email each other - it's all innocent stuff in the emails (i've seen them) - but it bugs me that they are still in touch. i come from the attitude that an ex is an ex, don't stay in touch what's the freaking point. shoot me now.

08-06-2008, 07:51 AM	#11
womann Banned Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 21	I can remember fist glancing through it amazed at the number of women this man has amassed throughout the decade. Even more so to my amazement was the fact he was able to get all of his women to unclad themselves for his photo-lens. Not an easy task for a novice. At any rate, a great collage of his triumphs and tribulations in the young age of the seventies, how love has effected his art, the times, and women in general. I was sold on the story. I believed it till the last page.