Can one recover from "Auto Rejection"?

Every seasoned DJ knows that attraction has an expiration date.

Everyone seasoned DJ should also be savvy enough to know that they should just approach the girl, and avoid auto-rejection in the first place.

In any case, what if you were put in a place where... because you didn't approach the girl and express your interest (IE by asking her out for a cup of coffee), she went into auto rejection and has gone cold and distant.

Before, she'd give me 3-4 second stares, smile, even wave. Now, she won't even make eye contact.

This is most likely a sunk ship, which is fine. But has anyone ever turned around a chick who went into auto-rejection before? If so, how did that happen/

Insouciant said:

Every seasoned DJ knows that attraction has an expiration date.

Everyone seasoned DJ should also be savvy enough to know that they should just approach the girl, and avoid auto-rejection in the first place.

In any case, what if you were put in a place where... because you didn't approach the girl and express your interest (IE by asking her out for a cup of coffee), she went into auto rejection and has gone cold and distant.

Before, she'd give me 3-4 second stares, smile, even wave. Now, she won't even make eye contact.

This is most likely a sunk ship, which is fine. But has anyone ever turned around a chick who went into auto-rejection before? If so, how did that happen/

Click to expand...

I dont get a feel for the exact circumstances.. was this a woman you saw somewhere regally? Or just some chick you saw from a distance in a club one time???

Because the two scenarios are kinda different. In a club, you can sometimes get away with making excuses for not seeing her do something or whatever or even that your shy, so you didn't approach, its possible to turn your disinterest to an advantage, obviously..The push pull thing.

...If however this was an ongoing situation where the chick had been giving you IOI's over weeks or months...and you never approached, and now she has gone cold...well clearly she will think you were not interested, but worse that you didnt step up and reciprocate in all that time, which would have been manners..Women take this as a diss and insult..obviously. She basically feels like a fool now because you dissed her, when she was basically hitting on you...

If its the long term scenario then you can tell her, you noticed her and really wanted to talk to her but that the whole time you couldn't because you had a Gfriend... This is your most plausible excuse for ignoring her..Dont say your shy, that's just a playful line for a club...women dont want guys who are too shy to approach them...so even if thats why you backed off, dont let on.

Girls get REALLY pissed off when you don't make a move I've noticed. They turn their attraction into hate for you really fast. Just make it a law in your mind to bust a move when things are alive and hot. If you don't care or find her attractive, fine, who cares, but if you do, it is in your best interest to say hello and ask for a date.

The answer is that you will seldom turn things around. It looks off: Oh, now you decide to go for it when she's pissed at you??? It's expired, too late, it's past it's prime. Just own your decision and next time...you know better.

One must strike while the iron is hot.
But - you already know that.

To turn this girl around, you'll need some help, I'd say. Social proof ( and I'm not talking about facebook crap) can win her back over to you. You just need to show her how fun and exciting you are. To just display this on your own is going to seem a bit lame and desperate. But to be hanging out with your friends and let her see you. Then, invite her into your world. If she passes, c'est le vie. That's life in the big city. Next!

VladPatton said:

Girls get REALLY pissed off when you don't make a move I've noticed. They turn their attraction into hate for you really fast.

Click to expand...

Yep. Give it up. Find somebody else. You're wasting your time.

She's already put you in a box in her mind. The way she sees it, she gave you the BIGGEST come on ever, IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY, and you blew her off (in front of everybody) like she was a piece of gum on your shoe.