Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

How to handle the talk about your preferences in women if it comes up in real life

HowardHughesDicaprio

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 14, 2014
Messages
203
Reaction score
8
what I've found over the years is that in our politically correct society, having a preference for particular kinds of women is just inviting trouble. I prefer white women almost exclusively as a middle eastern guy and have mostly dated white girls (along with some latinas that looked white), the only other race of women I am open to being with are middle eastern women. When in the past I have been asked about my preferences in girls or what kind of girls I like, I have answered honestly. Now unfortunately in the past it has seemed like a bad idea.

I have had quite a few women interested in me that were not white and when they asked me questions like if I am into their race (black women are the main ones doing this) I answered honestly and said no. Sometimes this has ended up in hell, I'll just say that there are quite a few people uncomfortable with the fact that I date white girls and have a preference for them and sometimes they make it the subject of conversation.

Quite a few do a lot to try and get me to change my preference (tell me how bad white girls are and make me feel guilty for pursuing them) and at times this has ended up in girls who were interested in me throwing a tantrum because I didn't want anything to do with them.

What my question is, how do I handle this situation? If I hide my preference and lie then the girls who like me will get the wrong message and go after me but if I say I am only exclusively interested in white girls then that results in anger from people.
 

Eph

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 20, 2012
Messages
542
Reaction score
32
This is one of those times when it's better to answer without straight-up saying it. They get to save face, you don't have to deal with "ego-preservation mode".
You should expect this if you're giving them an honest answer. The truth hurts and people can't take it. Scratch that, their ego can't take it. So, give them a way out by implying you only like white girls without actually coming out and saying it. There will still be times when people feel rejected by you, and try to get you to reconsider, but there's no way around it.
 

HowardHughesDicaprio

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 14, 2014
Messages
203
Reaction score
8
Eph, can you give me a good example of this? I have found some ways around it when people ask me what kind of girls I like, most of my answers are indirect and I do not come out and straight up talk about race. The problem is, and again I only encounter this with black women, when people ask me if I am into a particular race directly.

The problem is if I say that race doesn't matter to me then the girl thinks I am interested which most of the times (come to think of it all the times), I am not. Now if I answer saying no then the tantrums and the whole trying to get me to reconsider thing starts. How should I answer the question in that situation to let the girl know I am not interested in her without it turning into race? To be fair, most of the women that ask questions like that are generally lower class and not attractive, I doubt a Megan Good lookalike would ever ask that question.
 

Eph

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 20, 2012
Messages
542
Reaction score
32
If they specifically ask about their race, you could probably get away with saying "I've never dated ___ women before". But, obviously, you're likely to get asked why. You could play the "that's a little personal" card. You can just about say anything (or nothing at all) as long as you don't come out and say you don't like their race. It's hard to pull off but the best thing to do is take a page out the women's playbook. You're not saying no, but you're not saying yes either. Of course, this is only if you would rather not hurt feelings. If you really don't care, you could sternly say you're not interested.
 

SmooveMooves

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 9, 2013
Messages
1,453
Reaction score
698
Location
NY
Stop being so timid and stop being passive aggressive.

Alot of guys are too timid, too afraid to "offend" or "hurt" feelings.

I say fvck her, what she thinks, and her ego.

I run into this problem a ton, especially when a black chick finds out my dating history.

I'm a black dude that doesn't prefer black chicks unless they meet my extremly high standards. (to them) and once they find out I only mess with almost any other race except them they flip sh1t.

Random Black Chick: Why don't you ever date black girls Smoove?

Smoove: Uh... cause' I prefer other chicks.

RBC: Wow! How can you not date your on race?!

Smoove: Wow! Because black chicks aren't what I'm interested in!

***

The point here is, don't talk around it, tell her/them straight up, give her a reason. She can't be mad at you for a preference, its the same as chicks not dating a dude under 6'0.

Most likely this won't do anything but put her into qualifying mode where she'll be trying to prove to you that she can be the special black chick that broke your preference barrier.

She tries to start an arguement, tell you how white women are so bad?, shut that sh1t down. You tell her you know firsthand how other women are cause' you experienced it firsthand.

Tantrums? A woman wouldn't dare try this with me, she knows better. Alot of the stuff you guys let women get away with has to due with your Dominance/submissive relationship.

You are man, you state your opinions, ideas, and preferences at will.
 

Cremasta

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 5, 2003
Messages
964
Reaction score
39
Location
Australia
I usually answered something along the lines of "I just like women who turn me on, but I've always thought that mixed-race girls can be pretty hot! As long as they've got big boobs, I'm happy."
 

HowardHughesDicaprio

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 14, 2014
Messages
203
Reaction score
8
SmooveMooves said:
Stop being so timid and stop being passive aggressive.

Alot of guys are too timid, too afraid to "offend" or "hurt" feelings.

I say fvck her, what she thinks, and her ego.

I run into this problem a ton, especially when a black chick finds out my dating history.

I'm a black dude that doesn't prefer black chicks unless they meet my extremly high standards. (to them) and once they find out I only mess with almost any other race except them they flip sh1t.

Random Black Chick: Why don't you ever date black girls Smoove?

Smoove: Uh... cause' I prefer other chicks.

RBC: Wow! How can you not date your on race?!

Smoove: Wow! Because black chicks aren't what I'm interested in!

***

The point here is, don't talk around it, tell her/them straight up, give her a reason. She can't be mad at you for a preference, its the same as chicks not dating a dude under 6'0.

Most likely this won't do anything but put her into qualifying mode where she'll be trying to prove to you that she can be the special black chick that broke your preference barrier.

She tries to start an arguement, tell you how white women are so bad?, shut that sh1t down. You tell her you know firsthand how other women are cause' you experienced it firsthand.

Tantrums? A woman wouldn't dare try this with me, she knows better. Alot of the stuff you guys let women get away with has to due with your Dominance/submissive relationship.

You are man, you state your opinions, ideas, and preferences at will.

WOW dude, nicely done man! Except I do suffer from women throwing their tantrums at me.
 

bdymstr

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 25, 2014
Messages
13
Reaction score
0
Location
New York
Being a black male who has interracial dated for close to 30 years, (mostly Asian & Caucasian), it all comes down to the comfortability factor. If there is no interest, I won't date you, simple as that. Being older, (50+) affords me the luxury to date who I prefer to date, not to conform to some outdated notion.
 

HowardHughesDicaprio

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 14, 2014
Messages
203
Reaction score
8
Tictac said:
"You are not for me" is all you need to know or say.

The rest is you being too concerned what other people think of you which is a total waste of time and life.
wow man, thanks, perfectly said!
 

Zarky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 13, 2010
Messages
3,245
Reaction score
88
Location
SoCal
Your response should be tailored to increase the asker's likelihood of giving you what you want, especially if it's a woman.

Typical dude's mistake: thinking honesty or dishonesty is important. What's important is the effect of your communication upon the listener, insofar as how it increases the chances of them doing what you want them to do.

Now are you starting to understand? ;)
 

HowardHughesDicaprio

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 14, 2014
Messages
203
Reaction score
8
Zarky said:
Your response should be tailored to increase the asker's likelihood of giving you what you want, especially if it's a woman.

Typical dude's mistake: thinking honesty or dishonesty is important. What's important is the effect of your communication upon the listener, insofar as how it increases the chances of them doing what you want them to do.

Now are you starting to understand? ;)
I do not understand.
 

Greasy Pig

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 22, 2009
Messages
1,687
Reaction score
105
Location
Australia
My ex asked me this one day and I innocently said that I didn't really have a preference, I'm attracted to a wide range of women.
She blew her top and said if I didn't have a preference, I must just be a man wh0re who only wants to get his dyck wet.
She's probably right....
 
Top